❝ETERNAL FLAME❞
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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ chapter eighteen,
Gilmore Girls — Season One

January 5th, 2001

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[ LUCY'S POV ]

I DRAG THREE BAGS OF CLOTHING into Lorelai Gilmore's house in the early hours of the morning. Lorelai is organising the town's charity sale— something I admire because it's a difficult job— and I fixed up three bags of clothing to bring here after my father came back to the diner after disposing his own two bags.

I push open the door, and I'm greeted by bags, boxes, and galore. I'm not sure how Lorelai will organise all this, but I have admiration and sympathy for how she plans to deal with this.

"Hey," I call, hoping someone hears me. "I come bearing bags!"

I cross into the living room, finding Rory and Lane standing in the midst of the boxes. "Hey, Lucy," Rory says, waving her hand towards me.

"Where do you want these?" I ask, lifting the bags and failing to hold up her bags due to the weight of them.

"What's in them?"

"Clothes," I answer.

"Clothes can go right over there." I follow Rory's finger and I throw the three bags on top of the boxes and bags that are already stacked on top of one another.

     I have every intention of leaving but Lorelai rushes down the stairs, and when she swings around the banister, she nearly crashes straight into me. "Oh, Lucy, hey." Her hand touches my shoulder and I smile.

     "I dropped off some stuff," I say, pointing to my bags.

     Lorelai moves towards my bags, and I'm not surprised that Lorelai would want to look. She always ends up buying more stuff than she sells because when she sees a cute sweater or a pair of jeans, she has to have them until they're thrown into a charity sale the following year.

     Lorelai is pulling out one of my old t-shirts with a peace sign splayed across it. "Oh, I'm having this," she says, holding it up to her body to see they're similar in sizes.

     "Mom—" Rory begins.

     "This is gonna be a very special night. And you know what a very, very special night deserves?" I watch as Lorelai scavenges through another bag of clothing.

     "What?"

     She pulls out a hot pink dress from one of my bags. "A new outfit!" she declares. "Oh, how can you throw this away, Luce?"

     "Oh, now that you mention it—"

     I jokingly reach my hand forward and Lorelai yanks the pink material back into her hands. "Oh, no you don't, Missy. You gave it away."

     One thing Lorelai Gilmore always does well is recognising a good outfit from a mile away, even in bin bags. She's continuing to rummage through the bags when I leave the house. I say my goodbyes to Lane and Rory, not wanting to disturb them as they have a lot of preparation before the rummage sale on Sunday if Lorelai doesn't buy the entire lot.

     I, unlike others, didn't like to hold onto my old clothes, neither did my dad. When I grew out of my baby clothing, Dad had already thrown them away without consideration. The only piece of clothing he did keep from my childhood was a sweater I knitted with Maisie.

     Dad didn't keep old toys and clothing because he wasn't planning on having another kid to pass the clothes down to so he was quick to throw away all my old momentous. Photos of me were the only sentiments that he would keep over the years, and even then, we didn't look through them regularly. We aren't exactly a sentimental family.

     Upon arrival at school, I find Addy and Nathan by my locker, and I push past them before they lock lips and prevent me from getting into my locker. "Hey, lovebirds. Are you excited for tonight?" I grin, nudging Addy who hits her head against the lockers.

     "Oh, I can't wait."

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     MS. SLOANE WILL BE DROPPING ME AND ADDY OFF TONIGHT in New York, and my Dad will be picking us up. Until then, I had to do a shift at the diner, meaning I had to indulge in a very uncomfortable conversation with Miss. Patty who— shockingly— knows about me and Tristan.

     The thing is, I don't know how Patty knows. Tristan hasn't visited Stars Hollow officially, even though I'm ready for him too, and now the entire town knows that Tristan and I are together. Honestly, I don't mind the town knowing, but I don't want them to pester the poor boy when he eventually visits.

     My dad bought me a cellphone— exciting, right?— and the first number I added was Tristan's, and since getting the phone, we haven't stopped calling each other. I've told him about my dad knowing, and he seemed pleased. I then told him that my dad wants to meet him which he's slightly terrified for, but he's also excited.

     So after he returns from his family holiday in London, he'll be coming to Stars Hollow for the first time, and he'll meet my dad. Scary, right?

     I also warned him that the entire town knows about us— whatever we are.

     "Tell me why it's so shocking that I'm dating someone?" I ask myself, my voice louder than I intended it to be. The diner is bustling with people right now, including Rory Gilmore who sits across from me, and I smile pathetically at her.

     I hear Rory chuckle, and I shrink behind the counter, clutching the counter with my hands. "Don't worry, they did the same thing when they found out about me and Dean," she says, and I feel somewhat better.

     I lift my head, and I smile at Rory. "Yeah..." I sigh.

     "I don't think anyone in this town can imagine two perfectly respectable teenage girls dating." I hum in agreement because Rory is right. This entire town looks at me and Rory like we're valuable, and they can't imagine anyone, let alone a guy being anywhere near us. We're the town's daughters, and everybody is here to protect us with their watchful eyes.

     "They need to mind their own damn business," I mutter, and I realise I sound just like my dad.

     Rory lifts her coffee cup, saluting me. "Thanks for taking the heat off me."

     I chuckle, feeling a little better about all this. "How long did it take for people to stop staring at you and Dean?" I ask, mainly because I want to know how long I have until Tristan eventually runs away because he's scared of this town.

     Rory crosses her arms, taking a second to actually think of the answer. "A month... maybe two. I learned to ignore it."

     "Teach me your ways, Gilmore," I beg.

     Silence falls between us, and I move away for a second to grab my own cup and pour myself a coffee because I believe that'll cure everything. When I step back to Rory, I place my cup down and turn to Rory who asks, "So, you and Tristan? How did that happen?"

     I chuckle, a little caught off guard by that question. "Oh, uh..."

     "Sorry, it's none of my business, I..."

     "No, no, it's fine," I interrupt with an awkward laugh, shaking my head because I don't mind her asking. "We met at Addy's dance classes. She teaches these classes in Hartford every Friday, and he takes his little sister to them— sweet, right?—  and I met him there. We call each other and it's really great, and I..." I pause, realising that I've gone down a tunnel of rambling to Rory Gilmore of all people, but Rory is grinning, obviously amused. "Sorry."

     "It's okay," Rory laughs, and I smile despite feeling embarrassed. "He's been different in school, and I imagine you're the reason." I blush, finding it sweet in a way, and Rory catches the reddening of my cheeks. "Oh, you really like him," she toys, and I scoff.

     "Shut up," I insist.

I pour Rory another cup of coffee and she thanks me quietly. We take a sip of our drinks, and I'm about to speak but Rory thankfully talks first. "Someone put a rummage sale sign up in your window," Rory tells me, but I already know because I remember seeing it on my way in. "You should call the cops, we know how Luke feels about public displays of town affection."

"I think Lorelai asked him to put it there." Dad mentioned it this morning after he stopped by to drop off a couple bags.

"He said yes?"

"Oh, yeah," I chuckle. "Of course he did. He can't say no with her."

Before either of us can continue our conversation, Lorelai walks in and takes a seat next to her daughter. She's dressed in a rather outgoing, eye-catching outfit, but from the look on Rory's face, I can see that she doesn't like it.

Dad walks back into the diner to rush a couple plates to the customers. "Margaret Atworthy just dropped off three boxes of city council potholders and begged me to take her grandson. People are getting crazy, man," Lorelai announces, throwing her bag down on the counter.

She removes her coat, and I look to what she wears underneath. I think I recognise the sweat shirt underneath the coat but I can't place my finger on where exactly I've seen that sweat shirt. "What are you wearing?"

"Hey, we already argued about the sweatshirt," Lorelai defends.

"Yes, but we have not argued about the hat." I  move my eyes to look at the hat, quite amazed that someone can pull this off but if anyone can pull something off, Lorelai Gilmore certainly can.

"What hat?"

"The one on your head," Rory says.

"It's great, isn't it?"

"As nice as it is that you're trying to single-handedly rebuild the bridge, you have got to stop buying other people's junk," Rory insists, and it's surprising that Lorelai hasn't bought up all the town's junk.

"Money goes to charity, I look cute. Case closed." Dad finally steps over to us and presents a cup of coffee towards Lorelai, and I smile over in his direction. My smile falters when I find my dad's eyes are fixated on Lorelai's outfit, and his facial expression twists uncomfortably. "Oh, finally, the coffee cavalry arrives."

"What the hell do you think you're wearing?" Dad asks, and I tilt my head at the sudden outburst he appears to be having.

"A hat."

"Take that off," he demands, pointing to the sweatshirt Lorelai wears, and I look to Rory with a tight-lipped smile.

"What?"

"Now that is not yours. Take it off."

"I'll have hat hair," she complains, but Dad doesn't appear to be talking about the hat.

"I'm talking about the sweat shirt!" he yells, and I flinch at the increased volume of his voice.

"Dad, calm down," I warn.

"That is not yours."

"No, I found it in the bags of stuff for the sale," Lorelai claims, but Dad remains frustrated, and I'm still confused. Where have I seen that damn sweatshirt?

"Oh, so you just find something, and you take it? Is that it?" My eyes move to stare at the sweatshirt, the rhinestones, the pattern, the colour, and it all starts to click into place, and my eyes widen. Oh.

Lorelai continues to defend herself, which isn't surprising. "No, I paid for it."

"So that makes it alright?"

     "It makes it legal. What is the matter with you?" Lorelai looks between me and Dad, hoping to have an explanation but I remain silent because I'm not entirely sure whether I'm allowed to mention the reason for his outburst.

"Nothing. Nothing's the matter."

"Luke..."

Dad slams the pot of coffee down, and I flinch. "Pour your own coffee." He storms off, heading towards the stairs that go up to our apartment, and I let out a sigh as I look between Rory and Lorelai, seeing that both Gilmores are extremely confused.

"I'm sorry about that," I mutter as I begin to back away. "Uh, I'll talk to him."

As I walk up to the apartment, I fully grasp why Dad had his outburst. I know that there's a story behind the sweat shirt Lorelai was wearing, and it's always been a sore subject to talk about. Nobody ever talks about it because the story behind the sweat shirt left my dad with a broken heart— a broken heart I failed to understand at eleven-years-old.

     I push open the door— the one Dad slammed earlier— to the apartment. He's pacing up and down the length of the room, and this feels all too familiar. Five years ago when Rachel left, Dad did the exact same thing of pacing up and down, trying to collect himself.

     At eleven-years-old, I didn't know how badly affected my dad was by Rachel leaving, but now that I'm five years older, I can see that it impacted him more than he'd like to admit. He was always so good at ignoring his feelings, at bottling his emotions up, but I can often see right through him. I know my dad.

     I close the door behind me, and I cross my arms over my chest. "Dad, I know that Rachel—"

     "Don't say her name," he demands, and I scoff. He takes a seat at the table, and his head falls into his hands.

     I move to take a seat with him. "Dad, come on," I plead, trying to bring a calming tone to my voice to see if he'll speak to me.

      "Lucy, I don't want to talk about it, okay?" I fall silent, my eyes falling to stare at my hands that sit on my lap as I twiddle with my thumbs, something I used to do as a kid when I was uncomfortable and lost for words.

     Dad looks to me, and he sighs. I think he feels guilty for not speaking to me, for not confiding in me when all I want to do is understand his hurt. "I'm sorry, kid." He sounds genuine, and I lift my head. "You were there, Luce, you know exactly what happened."

     Of course I know the story, the town knows the whole story. Rachel, one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen, more beautiful than the princesses I read about as a kid, broke my dad's heart five years ago, and the breakup was messy. Rachel loved my dad, Dad loved Rachel but Rachel traveled a lot, and she was never in one place for too long. Sure, she stayed in Stars Hollow for quite some time but in the end, Stars Hollow didn't suit her. She wanted to leave but Dad couldn't uproot his life, especially when he had me to consider.

     People always imagined that my dad and Rachel would get married. Yes, I liked to imagine that my dad would get married one day, but Rachel wasn't the right person, not for him. I really did like Rachel, don't get me wrong, but she and my dad weren't destined to be in the end.

     Since the breakup, I haven't been introduced to any woman my dad shows remote interest in. Also, I don't think Dad has even considered another relationship since Rachel, and I guess I don't blame him.

     "There will be somebody out there for you, you know?" Dad hums in response, and I know he doesn't want to discuss this with me but I still talk. "And she'll be great, and she'll make witty jokes and drink a ridiculous amount of coffee— more than me, and she'll—" Dad glares at me, and I grin because I'm just describing Lorelai. "Sorry... I'm just saying that there's a person out there for everyone, okay?"

     Dad nods. "I know, kid. I know."

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     THE SEATS THAT ADDY AND NATHAN BOUGHT FOR MY BIRTHDAY are perfect. I've never been so close to a stage in my entire life— unless you count the stage at Miss. Patty's, but this is far better. I haven't shut up about these seats since we arrived ten minutes ago. I've already thanked Addy a million times, hugged her twice as much, and bought her most of the merchandise.

     We're now wearing t-shirts, bracelets and ridiculous headbands to fit the part of "crazed fans."

     We're eight rows away from the stage, and thankfully no tall people are blocking my view. Surprisingly, we aren't the only Stars Hollow folks to be in New York tonight.

     Rory is here with her mom and Sookie. She's behind us with three girls I don't recognise so I assume they're friends from Chilton. I honestly didn't expect to see Rory, but she was quick to say her hellos to me and Addy when we showed up after her.

     I knew they had something tonight, but I find it baffling that they had this exact Bangles concert the same night as us. Anyway, I say my hellos to her, and I smile politely at her and her friends.

     "Oh, this is Paris, Madeline, and Louise." Rory points to each of her friends, and me and Addy follow her finger. "Guys, this is Addy and Lucy, they're friends of mine from Stars Hollow."

     "Lucy..." I look towards the blonde girl— Louise— who looks me up and down, and I already know that she knows me. I'm a little afraid for what she's about to say, but then all she asks is, "As in Tristan's Lucy?"

     "Uh..." I chuckle awkwardly, a little surprised that she said that. "I guess."

     "Wow." I peer over at Madeline, and the two girls grin wickedly. They don't grin in an evil way, more of a "I can't believe it's you" sort of way. They look at me like I'm some sort of celebrity, and maybe I am in the Chilton world. "He never stops talking about you," Madeline drones, and I feel my cheeks heat from embarrassment.

     "He's, like, crazy in love, girl."

     Addy nudges me, and I roll my eyes because Tristan isn't in love with me. We haven't even discussed what we are to each other, so I don't even know if he's my boyfriend to begin with. I don't say any of this to Madeline or Louise, and the girl next to Rory— Paris— doesn't even spare me a glance. She just seems... frustrated by my presence, and I don't wish to ask why.

     Before anymore words are shared, the lights dim and we watch as the iconic band take the stage. My mouth falls agape in utter awe, because for as long as I can remember, I have been dying to see The Bangles live.

     My dad was never one for concerts, meaning I never went to them as a kid. Honestly, the idea of actually going to a concert terrified me when I was younger, but now that I'm here, I don't want to leave. I can definitely see myself going to concerts in the future.

     The beginning of "Walk Like an Egyptian" begins to play, and I cuddle my arm around Addy as we begin to sing along to the song we used to blast out as kids. We sway side to side, and we sign poorly. Well, Addy sings perfectly— as always— and my voice goes up and down at ridiculous tempos.

I do wish Nathan was here. He's a fan— even if he won't admit it— and I know he desperately wants to be here. We're going to buy him a shirt so he can remember the day that Addy and I went to this incredible concert.

     Following on from "Walk Like an Egyptian," they play numerous other songs until we reach my favourite of all time— "Eternal Flame."

     Me and Addy are sitting down, and we sing openly and proudly. "I believe it's meant to be, darling," I sing, swaying my head side to side. "I watch you when you are sleeping."

     "You belong with me," Addy sings on, and her voice is quite literally angelic. She should sing and dance on Broadway, she'd be a hit. "Do you feel the same? Am I only dreaming?"

     "Or is this burning an eternal flame?"

     I thank Addy again— six times— when we're leaving the concert, and we're stepping out into the brisk, cool air of New York City.

     One day I'd love to visit New York properly. Addy and I have already make plans to visit again soon so we can check out Juilliard. She wants to see the school she'll hopefully be attending in two years, and I want to see her face light up the second she walks inside.

     My dad is picking us up outside the Pastorella Theatre, and he should be arriving any minute. There's some traffic but we've scouted out a place where he can park— hopefully.

     "Thank you again," I tell Addy, nudging her as she leans her body into me. She's exhausted, and I know the second she gets into the car, she'll fall straight to sleep. Me and Dad might have to carry her into the freaking house later.

     Addy hums softly. "Well, I love you," she tells me, and I lean my cheek against her hair. "And I had a really great time tonight."

     "So did I, Ad."

     Any day I spend with Addy is a good day, and she knows that to be true.

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authors note:

chapter is very rushed at end.. kinda didn't know what to write about the concert

also i've officially wrote all of season 1 but haven't published it hehe. it's just being edited and stuff but i'm trying to post a new chapter every 2-3 days...