CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

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LUCIA HAD GOOD STAMINA FROM ALL THE YEARS SHE HAD SPEND IN THE WILDERNESS, WALKING A FEW FLIGHTS OF STAIRS SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN A PROBLEM. But with the amount of blood she had lost, the woman was out of breath after six flights.

The woman wasn't the only one getting tired, before her, Ellie was panting loudly as she held onto her side. Joel, who wasn't doing much better had to hold onto the railing to support himself. Having to rush up due to an emergency was a lot less difficult than casually strolling up the steps.

"Hey, you know that guy who said he was hurt?" began Ellie, once they reached the twelfth floor. "How did you know it was an ambush?"

Joel halted his steps, trying to catch his breath as he leaned over the railing to look at the girl backwards. Lucia stared up at him through the dark, head cocked to the side to await his answer. He knew this had to come out eventually and he might not have cared as much to admit it before, but Lucia's confession in the woods had shaken him.

He was ashamed, even if he had never harmed her or her brother himself. He hated himself for it, but there wasn't anything he could do to change his past. If he could have done anything about it now, he would have. It still haunted him to this day.

After a moment he decided, "I've been on both sides. It was a long time ago. We did what we needed to survive."

Lucia's blood had ran cold and even in the darkness he could see her tanned skin had gotten even paler. The woman was looking at him with an unreadable expression on her face. Lucia knew he had a past, it was evident in the way he carried himself, but she hadn't expected him to be a fucking raider himself.

"You and Tess?" her voice faltered, teeth clenched together.

"And the people we were with." he confirmed, looking down in shame. "My brother, too."

"Did you kill innocent people?" wondered Ellie.

Joel just stared at her, unable to form words but that was confirmation enough for both of them. It wasn't as if Lucia hadn't killed people, she had done that plenty of times. But each time it was for survival, never for anything else. These raiders, they killed for sports, hell they even enjoyed it. It was difficult for her to picture Joel doing the same.

"Is it haunting you?" muttered Lucia. The smuggler inclined his head and she chewed at her bottom lip. "Good. Now move, I need to lay down."

That was that. He had expected something much worse but he stepped aside when she passed him on the steps with determination. Ellie was quick to rush after her and after a moment even Joel trudged behind them further up the stairs.

Lucia couldn't hold him accountable for something he had done many years ago. Especially since they hadn't even known each other. He hadn't harmed her or her brother so she had no reason to be angry with him. She wasn't. It was just the fact that he hadn't told her earlier when she had confessed her past to him. He should have told her then.

Many pants and sharp pains in the side later, they had reached another floor and Joel pressed himself to the door and it opened. He was the first inside and led himself slide down the wall in exhaustion.

"Thirty-three floors. That's good."

"It's gonna have to be." breathed the man, eyes closed.

The teen chuckled and hit his boot with her own shoe, grinning up at Lucia who was holding onto her arm. "Come on."

"Gimme a minute."

"Get up, you lazy ass."

Joel looked affronted as he stared up at the teenager, who had outstretched her hand for him to take. With a quick glare, he took her hand and pushed to his feet. His back was aching and he grunted, lines appearing on his dirt filled face.

"Lazy ass." he scoffed, rolling his eyes as they walked down the hallway. "Fifty-two years old, you little shit."

"You definitely look it." Lucia voiced, raising a brow his way.

The smuggler swirled around and met her eyes but his scowl disappeared from his face when he noticed the slightest upturn of her lips. They were alright and he felt his shoulders relax slightly. He squinted his eyes and took a step toward her, eyes raking over her face.

"I don't know," he grimaced. "is that a grey hair?"

The woman smacked his hand away when he reached for a lock of dark hair and Ellie howled with laughter, trying to suppress them by smacking her hand over her mouth.

"Very funny, old man." she glowered.

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THE FLOOR WAS CLEARED, NO INFECTED OR HUMANS BESIDE THEM RESIDED THERE. There was a single old office room at the back of the hall and Joel smashed the window beside the door with his elbow. Shards shattered and fell into the bin behind the glass.

"Place seems secure." said Lucia, checking to see if there were any holes in the walls for others to crawl through. There were no secret hidings spots and she felt relatively safe since they'd gotten to Kansas City.

It was fairly clean, probably not touched since the world went to shit. They could make some room on the floor and use the pillows from the leather couches to create a comfortable place to sleep on. The couches themselves were small and if Ellie huddled her legs to her chest she might have fitted.

"Joel? What are you doing?" Ellie tried to get the smugglers attention when he emptied the bin on the floor in a small path toward them. Glass stuck to the carpet and Lucia sat down on the couch to go through her backpack. He didn't hear the teen. "Joel?"

"What?" he demanded, as if she had shouted at him.

"What are you doing?"

Lucia found the last of her water and downed it, her throat raw from the events of the day. The woman tossed the bottle back in and slid down the couch, making herself as comfortable as she could in the middle of the three makeshift beds. Her arm ached but it was manageable and she made sure to place a pillow underneath to elevate her limb.

"I don't want someone sneakin' up on us while we're sleepin'."

"Oh," she emphasised with a nod as she sat down on a pillow. "I get it. Crunch, crunch, crunch. Are you sure you're gonna hear it?"

"Of course i'll hear it. That's the damn point." he sassed, hand on his hip.

"Okay," Ellie held up her hands in defence and slid down the pillows to lay on her back. "well, good night."

Joel shrugged off his jacket and shook his head as he mumbled a silent 'good night' himself. He curled it up and used it to support his head as he laid down with his back toward the two women. It had been a strange night and all Lucia wanted to do right now was sleep and sleep. There was no awkward silence in the room, something they had often had since their journey had started, but as they had grown to live with each other it had gotten a lot less uncivil.

The smuggler was starting to open up and Lucia found that she didn't mind being around others as much as she had continued to tell herself when she lived in Boston. Company didn't make you weak, it made it easier.

"Hey," Lucia opened her eyes and glanced toward Joel, right arm resting behind her head.

"Yeah?" Ellie was the one to reply.

"When we were talkin' about hurting people what did you mean it wasn't your first time."

Lucia didn't have to look at Ellie to see that her face had gone sour, bad memories plaguing her mind. The teen was silent for a moment before she wiggled around and ended up on her back, staring at the white ceiling above. "I don't want to talk about it."

Joel turned his head slightly and said, "All right." Another moment passed and he sighed, turning around on his other side with his arms crossed as he looked past the brunette toward Ellie. "You don't have to. I'm just sayin' it isn't fair at your age, havin' to deal with all of this -"

"So it get's easier when you get older?" she asked.

"No, not really." he denied. "But still."

Lucia was too tired to join in on the conversation so she kept quiet, listening to the soft tones of their voices. Her eyes were still open, peering through the window on the other side of the room as she tried to see the stars, but it was cloudy and none of them popped through.

"The reason I asked wether you'd hear the glass or not is 'cause we noticed you don't hear too well from your right side. Is it 'cause you were shot there?" wondered Ellie, turning back on her side to look at him.

"Probably more from shootin'." he declared, twisting back around so he was laying on his right ear. "So if you wanna keep your hearin' you stick to that knife."

Ellie raised a brow and turned her gaze on the woman beside her, watching as the blood had stopped flowing down her arm. Lucia seemed to be deep in her own thoughts, fingers running absentmindedly through her dark hair as she scratched softly at the skin of her scalp.

God, Ellie would do a lot of things for another hot shower right now. She felt dirty and wanted to wash her greasy locks, she was sure the woman felt the same. The girl grinned, scrunching up her nose as she looked back at the man.

"Joel?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?"

"What?" he turned his neck slightly, confused. Ellie noticed the woman beside her flicker her eyes toward her as well for a moment.

"Yeah," she confirmed. "It runs in your jeans."

Joel gave her an incredulous look and fell silent. Even Lucia had a strange glance on her face, brows slightly turned. Ellie's face turned red as she tried to hold in her chuckles, but Lucia was the first to break as she huffed out a laugh, followed by another. The woman smacked a hand over her face and shook her head in amusement.

"Jesus," grumbled Joel as he turned his back to them but his snicker didn't go unnoticed by them. He didn't want to laugh, he really didn't. It was dumb and he hated that pun book of hers, but he couldn't help himself. "that is so goddamn stupid."

"You laughed motherfucker."

"I didn't laugh." he retorted, but he betrayed himself when another one left his lips. "Jesus, i'm losin' it."

"You're losing it big time." Ellie beamed, eyes bright with mischief.

"Who'd have thought?" teased the woman beside him as she turned her eyes to the back of his head. "Joel Miller, the big bad smuggler, chuckling like a little girl at stupid puns."

"Shut up." he said, but after the words left his mouth the three of them ended in fits of giggles. It was exactly what they needed. It felt natural and Lucia felt her heart rate slowly settle to a comfortable thump within her chest.

The smile didn't leave her lips as she fell into a dreamless slumber, Joel and Ellie still bickering back and forth.

I said we were meeting sam and henry this chapter but it will be next one, sorry! hope you enjoyed this chapter.