Book Name: Unidentified Darkness

Author: VArmyGhost

Reviewer: Anika FrozenHeartsGalaxy

Cover: 01/05

The cover theme is dark which somehow matches the plot but it's too black that I could only make out women's eyes. The font used for the title is too blurred and it ruins the attraction of the whole cover at first glance, even though the image isn't in bad quality if we look closely. Font style used for the author name and quote above are the best.

Title: 4/05

The title is rare, mysterious and gives insight into the dark plot and It is indeed relevant.

Synopsis: 7/10

The quote and plot summary in the description is thrilling and drives the readers toward the story but there are ellipsis mistakes. Make sure to use just three dots at the end of the sentence.

Execution: 8/10

I love how you spun the story making it look like Misa was the main protagonist first. But after she left, the story focused on Stella, even though Liya's character is very attention-grabbing and I think it's her in the book cover judging by how you always described her appearance in the story. At this point, I don't think anyone is supporting lead as they were the main protagonists of their own story and this is very intriguing. Misa was 16 years old while Stella was just one year older than her. After 2 years, they should be in high school or college, basically seniors. The first fight between Taekook and Liya was boring because you didn't put much effort in making the mood compared to the other missions that had too much climax and they were very fun and intense to read, especially how they rescued Stella from Shark. In conclusion, Every aspect of the plot book just improved as the story went on. I suggest editing your previous chapters.

Plot: 14/20

The exposition of the story was a little bit boring and very rushed, but if we read the story further It get very interesting and thrilling. The plot is quite rare with a lot of twists and turns. But sometimes you gave obvious hints and due to which we readers already knew what was coming next so we didn't feel any suspense. In chapter 2, you already revealed that Taehyung is someone dangerous through Jungkook so the readers knew he was faking, it wasn't shocking at all when he showed his true colours. 

Writing Style: 9/20

Your writing style lacks details. Some descriptions are well-explained but mostly aren't. Your way of explaining things and scenarios are too rushed. When you narrate a scenario, you have to create an imaginary world in the reader's mind through your writing skills and if you ruin it by rushing things then the reader might become confused and hence lose the interest. For example, when Stella went to Liya's house, I thought she would cook food in her house but then I suddenly realized she just brought food from her home because you didn't mention her carrying it until she placed it on the table. Also this part in chapter 3, "I stopped what I was doing and got ready to attack'' What she was doing? If you backread, you will realize you didn't mention anything about her doing so. Also Liya went to wash up and came back after barely 1 minute.

Grammar & Vocabulary: 5/20

Grammar:-

The book is full of past tense. I suggest re-edit your writing style to Present Simple Tense. The main use of the past tense is for finished actions in the past or past continuous if they are still occuring.

Chapter 1,

And scrolled through the her Instagram 

Reviewer: Definite article with that pronoun is mistake

Chapter 1,

She started yelling at Misa 

Reviewer: She yelled

Chapter 1,

Misa muttered under (my) breath

Reviewer: wrong usage of adjective. It was 3rd person pov. 

Chapter 1,

I want to discuss something important with you so (came) home as soon as possible 

Correction: Come

Chapter 2,

The boy turned his toward us

Correction: The boy turn toward us

Chapter 3,

(I) came beside me and slumped his arm on my shoulder

Correction: He

Chapter 4,

I sighed and started making way toward the headquarters

Correction: I sighed and made my way toward the headquarters.

Chapter 4,

(cuz) its better to be early than to be late

Reviewer: Don't use short forms

Also make sure the headings are bold because most of the time they weren't

Ellipsis:-

Ellipsis is three dots used at the end of a sentence to indicate nervousness or thoughtfulness. More than three dots is wrong. 

Chapter 1,

Well you see....dad called me

Chapter 3,

Nice to meet you Stella, hope we get along.....

Chapter 3, 

What the most important work I forgot is......Making dinner for Liya

Punctuation:-

In many places, you gave space before the quotation mark. Kindly avoid doing that.

Chapter 3,

Then what should I do...." I asked looking at her

Reviewer: Add question mark at the end of question.

Chapter 3,

"How long it has been since you last slept"

Reviewer: Same mistake here.

Chapter 4,

"Yah!!...where were you?!?" She (said) between her sobs

Correction: She asked

Spelling Mistakes:-

There are a bunch of spelling mistakes in your book and they are very noticeable. Kindly re-read your draft before publishing it.

Chapter 1,

I smiled trying to (lighted) the mood

Correction: lighten

Chapter 2, 

I turned (arond) and saw all the girls drooling over him

Correction: (around)

Chapter 2,

His eyes were (res) as he bared his fangs

Correction: red

Chapter 3,

Well seeing how (wierd) she is, I'm not even surprised anymore

Correction: Weird 

Chapter 3,

I (stared) walking angrily

Correction: started or start

Chapter 4,

I (side), hugging her tighter

Correction: Said

Chapter 4,

Everyone was wearing a mask quit similar to mine

Correction: (quite)

Capitalization:-

First letter of names, word at the beginning of sentence, action tag or dialogue should be capital.

Chapter 3,

With the help of jimin.... I passed it and I'm glad.

Reviewer: Capitalize first letter of name.

Chapter 3,

I had to cook for (liya) afterall

Chapter 4,

Jungkook stood up, nudging (taehyung) to do the same 

Characters & Development: 5/10

Misa described Stella as someone crazy at the beginning and she definitely was very enthusiastic and energetic at first. But as the story goes on, she seemed very timid and weaker than everyone, her original personality dramatically changed. Overall, all character's power, personality, true identity, dark secret and past were entertaining and mysterious plus they fit in the plotline. Sometimes emotions weren't described well because of the writing style and sometimes their reactions were unrealistic or none. When Taehyung got shot, Jungkook suspected Misa after recalling Taehyung's doubt toward her but at the same moment when she started crying, he felt bad for her. It totally looked like an instant mood swing.

Total: 53/100