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Not being able to handle myself in stressful situations had proven to be one of my worst qualities, but finding a way to fix that flaw had also proven to be just as difficult as the emotions that came with my stupid teenage angst. Why messing up in this way came to me so easily still baffled me, as I wasn't an unreasonable or rigid person in any sense. Still, I found myself snuggling against a pillow, crying my eyes out.

Things had been going so well for me here, but a sudden spur of pure and utter sadness had taken over my body once I came into contact with the bed. The soft pillows drew me in as I cried. My voice was silent as I sobbed.

I couldn't let my mates see me like this, I just couldn't do that to them. I had been working so hard here, to build a good life for myself and this little vampire family I had grown to love. Just stupid teenage emotions. God, get a hold of yourself before you make them think that you're a crybaby. I'm not a crybaby...

"Cara mia?" I wanted to bash my head in and run to my mate at the same time. Caius was standing at the door, watching me as I curled myself up on the bed.

"My darling mate, what's wrong?"

His questions remained unanswered, with me simply rubbing my head into the scented pillows that my mates had left for me to snuggle with while they went to trial. Lord, they were the best smelling things, their scent like a drug to my nose as I inhaled savory mint and flowers. According to them, I would also be able to leave a mark for them, but I did not know what I smelled like and could not tell the difference between our scents.

"Please," he pleaded with me, now standing next to the bed. I looked up at him with puffy eyes and watched as he moved me closer to the middle of our shared bed. I smiled sadly at him as he joined me in the blankets. "Are you okay, my darling Astraea?"

"I don't know," I sniffled into his chest, wanting him to wrap his arms around me. Feeling my body tense, my mate did what I needed him to do, pulling me into a comforting embrace. "Everything feels weird."

"That's the bond, mia cara. It will get easier, I promise. I should have known that your emotions would be out of touch for the first few months of our courtship. It was what happened with me as well with Aro and Marcus. Do not fret, cara, you are safe here in the castle," Caius rubbed his hands down my back, soothing me into his embrace. I buried my head into his shoulder, my tears still staining my rosy cheeks. "Do you wish to talk about it, amore, or do you wish to sleep?"

"Just don't go," I pleaded with him, not wanting him to leave the room without me. Frankly, I wanted to stay huddled here forever, even if that was not possible. "Don't leave me."

"Amore," his voice was low and sweet as he kissed my head, breathing out, "I would never leave you. Never. I'm yours, belissima."

"I missed you," I whined into his hard chest, "I missed you so much today. I hate it when you leave."

Caius gave me a look of understanding, kissing my cheek. A low purr rumbled from his chest as he held onto me, not leaving my side. He would have to leave to go back to work, but all I wanted was for him to stay. Stay, stay here with me. Lord, I sounded clingy, but it was all I ever could want. A mate, a vampire mate, here to hold me whenever I needed attention (which I hated to say, was quite often).

The blankets that held me tight in an embrace of its own shuffled as Caius made room for himself, making sure that all of those blankets did not suffocate me as he joined me in our shared bed. The golden sheets swirled around us as I calmed down, snuggling myself into his much colder self.

Even when my mates were cold, they lit up a fire inside of me that I wasn't used to at all. Being a passionate person when it came to my studies came easily, but when it came to romance... well my romantic life up until this point was in all ways nonexistent. I had never had a crush, let alone a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I truly had no clue how to be a mate or a queen, but I was thrown into the two jobs two weeks ago and would have to make do with my new life, new emotions and all.

"Why do you have to leave?" My mate let out a low growl at my question and peppered the sides of my face with sweet kisses. "You always leave to go to trial. I hate it so much. I hate it when you three leave me in here. I get so lonely."

"We do not mean to let you become lonely, il mio amore, we only wish to keep you safe," Caius tried to placate my upset, which didn't work and actually upset me and my sensitive emotions further. "Amore, it is a dangerous world when it comes to trial. We miss you as well and would much prefer to spend every waking moment of our immortal lives right next to you, but duty calls. Humans being near criminals... it would be highly unsafe."

"You three get to be together and I don't get to be with you," I sniffled, my chest tightening with jealousy. "I want to have time with you. Is that so much to ask?"

"No, amore, it isn't too much," I frowned as he pulled me up on his chest, allowing me to rest my entire body on his. Laying on top of him was something I did quite often. It was comforting and helped me sleep through the night with less nightmares of what had happened on my birthday, which still plagued me weeks later. I would never forget that afternoon, it had changed my life forever.

"I'm being clingy," I realize, pulling away from him. Caius growled and pulled me back to him, running his long and slender fingers through my platinum blonde hair. "Nooo, I look ugly, go away..."

"You look gorgeous," he denies, kissing up and down my collarbones. "I think you're tired and need to go to sleep."

"No I'm just sad and need snuggles," Caius chuckled and pulled me up to face him, looking me directly in the eye. I felt as my heart started to beat faster, those red eyes of his turning my entire face scarlet. "Why do you do this to me? What have I ever done to you?"

"Shhh, don't be difficult, amore," he shushed me, placing a hand on my reddened cheek before pulling me into a passionate kiss. I closed my eyes, enjoying our clashing lips as I layed on top of him.

A loud knock on the door interrupted us, making Caius let out a feral growl as he yelled, "Who is it?"

Aro and Marcus came into the room, blinking a few times as they took in what as laid out before their eyes. The latter smiled and grabbed another blanket from their closet, placing it on the two of us. Aro fitted it around us before giving each of us a kiss on the cheek.

"We didn't mean to disturb you, tesoro," Marcus soothed our mate's short temper, running his fingers through Caius' shoulder length blonde hair, "Aro and I were simply worried by the sudden upset that rolled through the bond about fifteen minutes ago and wished to check on Astraea. You also need to come back-"

"No," Caius snapped, holding onto me with newfound strength.

"No?" Aro repeats, looking at the two of us with curiosity, "Amore, we must do our duties to our coven. I understand that it is hard to do so when our darling is inside of this room, away from us, but we still must remember that we are kings and the vampire world needs us."

Being alone, it was always one of my worst fears. I couldn't just be alone when I wanted to be connected to my mates in ways I didn't fully understand. Their touch came with comfort and relaxed me into long stretches of sleep. I didn't want to be alone in this room. It hurt me to be in this room all by myself, even if my mates had given me things to do with myself while they did their jobs as kings.

"Aro, please-" Marcus starts, but is cut off by our mate.

"Amore, they need to know the truth. We have jobs to do that cannot be interrupted like they just have been. We have ways that we have done our jobs for the past three millenium," Caius let out a loud hiss at our mate's words, tucking my head under the blankets we were wrapped inside. Aro sounded less than impressed as he said, "Caius, get yourself together and ready for the next trial-"

Our blonde mate let out one of the most aggressive hisses I had ever heard, even angrier than some of the feral cats that lurked around the city at night. All I could hear was a few shuffles before someone, most likely Aro, pulled the blankets off of my face. I whined and batted his hands away from my face as he tried to situate my hair, which was almost falling into my eyes.

"Stop it, Caius," Aro snapped as Caius tried to stop him from moving my hair out of my face, "Don't you hiss at me either."

"Aro, you're upsetting them," Marcus lightly moved Aro out of the way and sent me an apologetic look. "My love, you can't separate them right now. If Astraea was upset she will need one, or to be frank all of us to help her. You know how this works. It is harder since she is human and our bond is incomplete, but we cannot allow her to upset herself through the bond," Marcus turned to look at me while I huddled myself in as much blanket as I could get my hands on. "Amore, what made you so upset? You... the bond told me that it was quite severe."

Looking at my careful mate, I reach out for him, wanting more of his soothing comfort and honey-laced voice. Caius softened once he saw my hands reaching out to our shared mate, allowing Marcus to take my warm hand and place a gentle kiss on my knuckles.

"Tesoro, what has been bothering you?" his voice was genuine as he spoke, tantalizing in his own right.

"I'm lonely," I admitted, "I miss you three all the time and there's no pillow that can replace you while you're gone."

"Amore," he whispered, moving closer and slipping himself onto the bed (much to Aro's dismay). "We do not wish for you to be lonely while you are here with us in the castle. Do we not spend enough time together?"

I shook my head, knowing that all of their free time was spent with me. It was ridiculous that I would want this much attention. I had never longed for the attention of anyone like I longed for theirs. Their attention, their approval, their love, I wanted it all.

"It's not fair on you three," Marcus shook his head at me before snuggling up into my chest, purring. Aro looked down at the ground before doing the same, keeping himself in-between Marcus and I. Their distinct purrs calmed my senses, making me want to sleep instead of speak. "Now I'm tired."

"We shouldn't leave you in here during trial," Aro mutters.

"Trial is dangerous," Caius whispers, running his hands through my hair, "I miss you during the daytime as well, γλυκιά μου, but to have you in there... you could be hurt. The mere idea of it is too painful."

"Keeping Astraea safe also means keeping her happy," Aro reminds our mate, "If she is not happy then her being safe means absolutely nothing. Mental and emotional security should be our top priority right now."

"If she did come to trial, who would guard her?" Marcus asks. "She would need to be with us as well as multiple of our best guards to ensure she stays safe near those wretched criminals."

"Jane and Alec are still on guard duty during trial, they could be her personal guards for the time being," Caius suggests, snuggling even further into the blankets and pillows that smelled of mint and our mates.

At that, it was done. I would be accompanying my mates to trial.

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From what I had learned about what went on in a vampire trial, I could deduct that things usually did not end so well for criminals. Of course, the only real experience I had with a genuine trial was the one with the Olympic Coven.

I had to give my mates some due credit, they ran the vampire community with little uprising on anyone's part. It was smooth, succinct, and with little failure. Having a vampire that could literally see into your memories to tell if you're telling the truth or not is something that the human community could use to their benefit, seeing as so many people go to jail for crimes they did not commit.

"Tesoro, we must go now of we are to make it there in time," Marcus called out from the doorway into our bedroom. Rushing to grab a coat before we left, I saw the smirks on my mates' faces at what I wore. A light yellow dress with hints of gold looked good on my slim figure. "You look divine, mia regina."

"Let's go, amore," I heard Caius whine and complain from the same doorway. I chuckled, walking closer to them, eventually meeting their much taller bodies.

We walked all the way down the hall before it really hit them that I would be in a room full of vampires, some not even trained in extreme control, for an extended period of time. Aro had gone a bit rigid in his stance, barely breathing, which was a bit concerning even if he lacked the actual need to breathe. Marcus had become much more protective, something that Caius had done as well. Both of them stood by my side and huddled their bodies around me so as to not allow anything to be able to touch me.

I was almost completely out of sight when we got to the large doors that led into the throne room, which was also used as the room for trials. Many guards turned to face my mates and I as we passed, bowing their heads in respect as Aro opened the doors, allowing me to see what was going on inside.

Pinned down to the floor was a red-haired vampire. Who he was or what he had been accused of didn't concern me as I watched him growl and hiss at Demetri and Felix, who were holding him tight so he couldn't try to escape.

"What the hell?" he blurted out as he took a sniff of the air. "Why is there a human here?"

"That human is your queen and you shall show her respect," Aro said with a commanding tone, walking over to his throne and taking a seat. Marcus walked with me over to his throne where he sat down. I smiled and happily sat down on his lap, looking out to see the red-haired man snarl at the mention of a human queen.

"You can't have a human for a queen! We are vampires!" Caius hissed at his words, taking a step towards him as he spoke. Marcus had to take in a deep breath of unneeded air as the man started to harass me, "She isn't supposed to be here. You don't allow humans in the trial room. I demand to have her escorted out immediately before she becomes a snack."

"If you even dare to put a hand on my mate I will make you wish you were never born," Caius snarls in his face before ripping one of his arms clean off his body. I fidgeted uncomfortably as I saw his right arm roll onto the floor with a loud cracking noise. "That is my mate, your queen, and the most precious thing in this room right now. I don't care if she's human, she's mine."

"You can't-" Caius ripped the left arm off this time, making the young looking vampire scream in pain.

"I'll do whatever I please to anyone who calls my mate a snack. I'll have you know she's a full course meal that will never be eaten by the likes of you," My blonde king sneers before looking up at Felix, "What has he been accused of?"

"Feeding inside of the walls," my mates hissed in disapproval. Locals were to be protected, and if he fed off of anyone that was here, especially if they were a local, he would be killed immediately. Dangerous game. You played a dangerous game and I think you're about to lose.

"Aro," Caius looked at our mate, "Check him."

The raven-haired king stood from his throne, making his way to the alleged criminal faster than my eyes could comprehend. Taking his hand, I could see my mate's eyes gloss over as he took in all of the man's thoughts and memories. They would forever be ingrained into his own memory as he could never forget a single detail as a vampire.

"Indeed. We are lucky that it was not one of the locals, but a tourist family that he fed on. A shame, you were so close to the walls of our territory, you should have just gone a few miles north to be safe. Alas, now you must die," Aro sighed dramatically before ripping off the man' head, allowing Demetri and Felix to rip up the other parts of him. "We get so many of these cases. You would think that after so many years they would learn. I thought we made it quite clear that nobody is to hunt inside of our territory."

"We did, amore, people are just stupid," Caius snarks, making his way back over to Marcus and I. "All safe and happy, my Astraea? Make sure that you keep her warm in here, amore."

"I know, tesoro," Marcus replied, lazily throwing his cloak over my body.

"I'm good, Caius," my blonde mate smiled before kissing my hairline, standing right behind us. "Do you have any more trials for the day?"

"No, that was the last one, amore. We have the rest of the day off."

With that new knowledge I hum, not knowing what else to say next. There were a wide variety of things that we could do, with me sleeping being one of them. My mates seem to love to watch me sleep. As Aro put it, it was like watching an angel rest, whatever that meant. Both Caius and Marcus liked to cuddle with each other and me when I would sleep, making sure that I was as comfortable as can be.

"If you have any energy left we could go and show you some of the more magical parts of the castle that humans never get to see," Marcus suggested. Magical parts... what could possibly be more magical than the castle itself? Full of vampires... wait does that mean that there are potentially other magical creatures out there? That would be amazing!

"Would they get mad at us for telling her or do you think we could get away with it?" Aro asks, a small look of worry on his face. "I mean, the wise child could yell at us for such an act. I would not wish for an angry visit from her."

"Speaking of the wise child, she comes every summer. She will be here soon enough," I was so lost as to who or what they were talking about. "Oh, tesoro, the wise child has been a friend of ours for many years now. We met her when she was a mere twelve year old coming to Volterra for a summer trip with her classmates. We can explain somewhere more comfortable if you would like."

"You know, that may be necessary considering she will want to see the animal room," Caius points out. "Some of those creatures will be hard to explain away without some context."

"Wise child and creatures can be saved for our bedroom, I want to go back to our bed."

 "Of course, cara mia. Ooh, let me carry you this time!"

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