AS EVAN WALKED away from Stephanie's room, storming down the stairs on his way to Keira's memorial, Stephanie exhaled as she looked down at her hands. She tilted her head to the side, thinking about Keira. As she thought about how mean she had been to the younger girl, she felt tears stinging in her eyes. She regretted everything, down to the very last words she had said to Keira, even if they weren't said directly. Stephanie knew that Keira had figured out who had put the posters up, and when she saw how it affected Keira, Stephanie felt the first ping of guilt she had felt in a very long time. She had caused the downfall of someone's life over some stupid posters 'exposing' Keira for what she was - what Stephanie didn't want to come to terms with. She had driven a girl to suicide, something that never should have happened, and when Stephanie heard of the news, she realized something.

She had used the means of inflicting pain upon Keira to cope with something she couldn't accept herself for, and it made her feel disgusting. She took a long, hard look in the mirror that day as her mascara ran down her face and growled at the reflection that she didn't want to see.

"I'm a monster."

That's what she was, and with everything that happened in the weeks since Keira's death, Stephanie couldn't take it anymore. She drew in a shaky breath as she grabbed a pillow, hugging it to her chest as she sobbed, one word echoing over and over in her mind.

Monster.

>>>>>>>

Angelica trudged home after going to Monica's house, the tears staining her cheeks threatening to freeze as she walked through the cold air. Her and Evan had split up after leaving, their plans for the day ruined by the news they received. She sighed as she walked up the porch steps and through the front door.

"Back so soon?" Monica asked as Angelica stepped into the house. As she shut the door behind her and Monica saw the weak half-smile she was forcing, tears staining her checks, she rushed over, "Oh, honey, what's wrong?"

Angelica took one step before falling into her mother's arms, sobbing into her shoulder as Monica told her it would be okay. She cried for a while before she stopped, feeling numbness wash over her like ocean waves lapping at a sandy shore. As she adjusted her head on Monica's shoulder, she drew in a shuddering breath, a few last tears streaking down her freckled cheeks.

"Mom," Angelica croaked, her voice breaking as she blinked a couple of times.

This didn't feel like reality. It felt like some sick dream that Angelica couldn't wake up from, and what she was going to say next furthered that point.

A few minutes later, Monica responded, "Yes, Angel?"

"Keira," Angelica tried to say, then paused, "Keira, she was..."

She couldn't bring herself to tell her mother, the words feeling like burning bile coming up, but she had to say it one way or another. Drawing in another shaky breath, Angelica prepared herself to speak as her mother pressed her to continue.

"Keira what?"

"Sh-she was murdered, M-Mom," Angelica explained in voice that wasn't her own, feeling guilty for not being able to feel anything at the moment, "Keira w-was murdered."

Monica let out a short cry, the words hitting her like a stab through the heart as tears started to stream down her face. She buried her head into Angelica's hair as she held onto her like she could never let go, "Oh, Angel, I'm so sorry..."

And the two embraced each other, mourning the loss of a best friend.

<<<<<<<

Meanwhile, as Angelica returned home, Evan did also. He had his hands in his pocket and head down as he walked through the door, tears streaking his cheeks. He was angry - furious - at the person who would kill his best friend, at Stephanie, at Deputy Howard, at the world.

His mother called to him from the kitchen, but he was too busy kicking his shoes off to care. The racket he was making as he trudged up the stairs was quite the sound, but everything was quiet to him. His ears wouldn't stop ringing, the sound of Deputy Howard's voice echoing in his voice again and again as time moved in slow motion.

Evan couldn't believe his best friend was murdered, he couldn't face the harsh reality that the murderer could have been anyone - even someone he was close to.

Before storming into his room, Evan decided to pay a visit to Stephanie. He had so much to say to her now, more than ever, and all of it was going to be said, no matter if it belittled his older sister. She had belittled his best friend up until her untimely death, and in his fury, he thought she deserved some of that too.

He stopped in the doorway of Stephanie's room, seeing her sitting on the bed with her back to him. Drawing in a wavering breath, he sniffled, then spoke.

"Are you happy?" Evan questioned forcefully, "Keira was murdered, you-"

He stopped in the middle of his sentence with wide eyes as Stephanie looked over her shoulder. Her blue eyed gaze stared into his, shining with tears. Her eyes were red and puffy, her cheeks glossy from crying. Evan quietly gasped, and it was then that he realized that her shoulders were shaking when he had first walked in.

Evan couldn't quite wrap his head around what was going on in here, but as Stephanie gave him a weak, shaking smile, he stepped closer.

"Hey..." He breathed, his voice nasally, "A-are you alright?"

Stephanie shook her head in response, patting the spot next to her as she sniffled. As Evan sat down next to Stephanie, she felt the bed dip at the end from the added weight.

"Steph, what's wrong?" Evan asked, and even though he didn't like his sister sometimes, he hated seeing her in a fragile state like this. It made him hurt for her.

Stephanie blinked back tears before responding, looking down at her hands as an indescribable ping of guilt spread throughout her chest, "I'm a monster."

Evan was taken aback, his response and tone of voice showing this, "Why would you say that?"

"You're going to hate me for this," Stephanie let out a cold, emotionless laugh as she tucked a strand of her disheveled brown hair behind her ear.

"I'd never hate you," Evan reasoned as Stephanie shook her head, hating how hard she was being on herself at the moment.

Stephanie shrugged, sighing. She didn't even know where to start with everything she needed to tell her younger brother.

"I'm sorry," She started after a brief moment of pause, her voice breaking as she continued, "I never m-meant for anyone to get hu-hurt when I put the p-posters up. I never meant to drive her to suicide - or m-mu-murder for that matter, as from what you s-said when you came in... I n-never meant to hurt anyone..." She let out a sob, then continued, "I- It wasn't supposed to go this way... Evan, I'm sorry - I regret everything," She stared into his eyes, and as she went on, he understood what she was going on about, "I never meant to hurt her, but I couldn't accept myself for what I figured out I was. We were the same, we both considered either gender as an okay option, but I felt disgusting in my own skin to admit that... so I turned to inflicting pain on Keira to mask it - I used my insecurities to belittle someone else for the same thing... and I can't help but think it got her killed. The group I was in... they wouldn't accept me for who I was... I faked liking the people I dated, it was a facade for who I really was and I feel disgusting for it. I just wish I could have realized what I was doing sooner... I could have told her that I cared..." Stephanie looked down, tears falling from her cheeks and onto the pillow in her lap, then whispered, "I'm so sorry..."

Evan listened to her, absorbing every word. At first, he didn't quite understand what she was saying, but as she went on, he wanted to hurt her for what she had been doing. He tensed up, trying not to lash out, but seeing how it affected her as she finished confessing everything, he couldn't find it in his heart to blame her. Of course, she bullied Keira to no end, exposing her and getting under her skin, but she had realized where she had been wrong. She apologized for her mistakes, and though it would take a while, Evan decided to forgive her. He would never forget what Stephanie did, but he could forgive, even if it wasn't going to be easy.

Smiling weakly at his sister, he pulled her into a hug as she cried. She accepted, falling into his hold. Her arms loosely lay around him, returning a small hug. Evan thought of everything that had happened in the past month as he cried with her, facing the new reality that he was living.

As they sat there, embracing each other, it was the first time Evan saw Stephanie for who she was; human.