˖ ࣪ AGAIN, AGAIN, 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡
AGAIN. . . !

━━━━━ ( 019. real life )
✶ ・・❛ BEGGING ON YOUR KNEES. ❜

( ☾ )

CLEMENTINE ADJUSTS THE dress hugging her hips, letting out a frustrated breath as jax leads her into a living room jam-packed with at least one hundred people.

she has hated parties ever since the very day she was born honestly. she will never not hate them. she hates the overcrowded rooms. she hates the drama. she hates the noise. she hates the anxiety that comes with it. she hates all of it.

here she is though, being dragged right into the center of one.

jax stops walking once he reaches a group of his football friends and she rolls her eyes, disconnecting her hand from his and glancing around the room.

it's when she sets her eyes on bianca stood next to a table full of drinks with manny and gian that she suddenly has a reason for being here.

her face lights up at the sight of them and she taps on jaxs shoulder to let her know where she's going but he's so engulfed in conversation from his friends that he doesn't even turn his head. she sighs and turns around, heading for her friends without telling him since he won't even give her an ounce of his attention.

he's gotten so indifferent with her recently. he used to only ever act like this every now and then but now it seems like she's lucky for him to be in a good mood. it's probably because of chris' sudden return to her life but it's not like that's her fault. she wishes he could just communicate his insecurities instead of taking his anger out on her.

all of those thoughts leave her head though, once she reaches her friends. bianca's face immediately lights up. "clementine!" she exclaims, announcing her presence to gian and manny who hadn't noticed her yet.

manny instantly gives her a warm smile and gian grins and wiggles her fingers at the girl in a wave. "hey guys." she smiles brightly at them before turning over to manny and raising her eyebrows. "is this your first boston party, manny?"

"it is," he confirms with a grin, glancing over to gian before speaking again. "gian invited me because she 'didn't want to put up with finnley by herself.'"

bianca chuckles at that and gian nods her head like the point is valid but clementine just narrows her eyes at her. "you say that like you don't secretly love when he flirts with you."

gians jaw drops in offense and bianca covers her mouth to laugh. "woahhhh," manny chuckles.

"what?" gian manages a cough. "that's just.. not true."

"yeah, alright," clementine chuckles. "when are you gonna tell him you want him?"

gian rolls her eyes, now not bothering to keep her guard up and instead crossing her arms. "never," she responds with a shrug. when clementine frowns at her, she points to somewhere behind her. "he seems to be enjoying himself how he is right now."

clementines eyebrows furrow and she turns around, following where gian is pointing towards and sighing when she finds the sight of finnley making out with some random girl on a couch.

she wishes finnley wasn't such a man whore sometimes so gian could just admit that she secretly likes him. her face scrunches up the longer she watches... that before she gets an idea. she suddenly turns back to gian and gives her a look that says 'watch this' before she turns back around.

"finnley!" she calls out, ignoring the immediate 'what the fuck's she gets from her friends. finnley luckily hears and pulls away from the girl he was busy making out with. his face is an annoyed one as he glances around the room and when he finds clementine, he gives his middle finger and turns around to continue kissing the girl.

clementine though, just simply rolls her eyes, knowing him better than that. it's when she shouts, "gian's over here!" that he pulls away from the girl once again and turns around completely, this time his face the exact opposite of annoyed. the girl he left behind scoffs and says something clementine can't decipher but he just shrugs and begins walking towards where all the girls stand.

clementine smirks and turns back around to face gian whose jaw is currently dropping. "you were saying?" she raises her eyebrows, instantly earning laughs from manny and bianca.

finnley soon reaches the group after she's spoken, a grin now on his face. "hey guys," he says first, addressing everyone before his eyes focus on gian specifically, his voice growing lighter. "hi, gian."

gian tilts her head at him and even though clementine knows she always tries her hardest to hide it, she can see the hidden amusement in the way she holds back a smile. "hi, finnley."

the group begins some random conversation in which finnleys eyes are always only on gian, making clementine all the more amused. she zones out of whatever they're talking about, instead noticing how much more noise is coming from the kitchen of her house. her eyebrows furrow slightly. she does need a drink...

before she knows it, her curiosity and her need for a drink gets the best of her and she excuses herself from the group. she weaves through the crowds to get to the kitchen and things are much noisier in the crowded room.

she can't figure out why everyone's so much louder in here though, so she just sighs and settles for finding a drink. she doesn't want alcohol, just a soda or something.

it's not until she's made her way to the fridge and is looking over her choices of drink that she suddenly figures out why everyone's so chatty in here.

"well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" clementine's eyes are instantly clamped shut at the infuriating sound of chris' voice. there's no fucking way.

( ☼ )

CHRIS WATCHES WITH A grin on his face as clementine completely freezes from the sound of his voice. she definitely didn't expect him to be here tonight, along with the other hundred people who keep looking at him like he's some sort of never seen before art exhibit.

he can hear clementines sigh as she grabs a drink and closes the fridge door, giving her view of where chris stands behind it. chris' grin instantly widens at the sight of her pretty face.

"hi, clem," he speaks softly, honey practically dripping from his lips with his sweet tone of voice. he glances over the drink in her hands, looking back up to her amused once he sees that it's a pepsi. he doesn't say anything about that though, instead allowing his actual thoughts to leave his head. "you're looking pretty," he compliments her. he allows his eyes to wander over what she's wearing. she's wearing the dress she was wearing when they met for the very first time. chris noticed as soon as he spotted her walking into the room. he wonders if she remembers the significance of it. "as always."

her eyes glance over the features of his face for a second before she gives him a tight lipped smile. "my boyfriend told me the same thing." she emphasizes the word and chris' lips are instantly set into a thin line. "which, by the way, he's going to be pissed when he sees you here."

all he does is roll his eyes. "your boyfriend this, your boyfriend that," he complains, stepping back to lean against the counter behind him as clementine crosses her arms. "that used to be me, you know?" the corner of his lips turn upwards at the way clementine instantly narrows her eyes. "let's talk about that instead."

chris knows he honestly should've seen it coming when her next words are, "let's talk about how you broke up with me on christmas eve." chris presses his lips together as she tilts her head at him. "that was—"

"stupid of me," chris finishes for her, making her roll her eyes. "my one, great regret," he continues on, only receiving a blank look from her. he wants to see her face change, so he takes a step forward off of the counter he was leaning on. he steps towards her and looks right into her eyes when he says, "i'd do anything to take it back, you know that."

she looks over his face once before scoffing. "well, that's never gonna happen."

chris doesn't back down though. of course he doesn't. "what do i have to do to make up for it, clem?" he asks softly, making her eyebrows raise at the audacity he has to ask that. he remains the same though and asks again, "what do i have to do to get you to forgive me?"

clementine narrows her eyes at him. "i'd like to see you begging on your knees," she tells him sarcastically, reaching her hand forward to pat his shoulder as he raises his eyebrows. she then removes her hand and takes a step back. "then we'll talk."

she begins to turn away after she's said that, but she honestly never should've said it in the first place because chris has never been one to back down from a challenge.

"alright."

clementine pauses her movements, slowly turning back around from where she was attempting to walk off. once her eyes are back on him, chris does something he never thought he'd have to do. he slowly lowers and drops to his knees. he drops to his fucking knees for clementine in the middle of this high school house party.

clementines eyes instantly go wide and she begins looking around panicked at all the people now looking at them. "chris," she whispers like he's a psychopath. "what the fuck are you doing?"

"i'm begging on my knees, baby," chris' voice is especially smooth as all he manages is a shrug. "just like you said."

clementine's face instantly scrunches up from the pet name. it doesn't scrunch up like how it does when jax calls her it though. it doesn't scrunch up because she's disgusted. it scrunches up because she's flustered.

chris has honestly never been a fan of pet names and he could've sworn just a month ago that he'd never be caught dead using them, but now, seeing the way they make clementines face go just slightly red in the way it never does because of her boyfriend, he decides he loves using them.

she pinches the bridge of her nose, trying to not lose her mind at the way literally all eyes are on them and chris on his knees right now. "chris, i was being sarca—"

"i'm sorry," he cuts her off without a care, wanting to do exactly what she said even if it was delivered as a joke. her expression falters so chris grows more serious when he says, "please forgive me," he begs. he's literally begging on his knees.

clementines eyes soften for just a moment. it's only a few seconds before she hides the same softness but it's too late, chris saw it. she shakes her head at how much of a fool he's acting like right now, but still, she gives in. "okay, chris," she sighs. "i forgive you." chris' face instantly lights up and she rolls her eyes, stepping forward to manually pull him off of the ground herself. "now get up, you fucking maniac."

"alright, alright," he chuckles, not even having a care that everyone around them just watched him do that. he stands up straight and she lets go of where she pulled him up by his arms. "so," he grins at her. "you forgive me, huh?"

"yeah, chris, sure," she tells him what he wants to hear with a roll of her eyes, his grin not faltering. "i forgive you or whatever," she says it like it's a pain for it to leave her lips. "can you stop acting like an insane person now?"

"i was just doing what you told me to, babe," he shrugs easily, resisting a smirk when her face scrunches up the same way it did before.

"don't call me that."

"why?" he challenges. "too scared to admit you like it when i call you it but you don't when jax calls you it?"

clementines eyes are instantly narrowed at him but honestly, he can confidently say they both know what he said is the truth. her body gives it away every time the word leaves his lips.

"you're crazy."

"you love it."

"no, i don't, actua—"

"the fuck are you doing here, sturniolo?" the voice of an ogre (jax) cuts off clementines angelic voice, instantly making chris want to rip his hair out. he presses his lips together and looks past clementine to now find her beast of a boyfriend stood a few feet behind her.

"oh, me?" chris responds, noticing the way clementine is looking at jax in a pleading way not to make a scene but his eyes aren't even on her. chris steps forward, coming closer to jax. "couldn't resist the opportunity to see clem."

jaxs jaw clenches so hard so fast that it's honestly a bit laughable. jax takes a step towards him and chris rolls his eyes at the way he tries to make an intimidating face. "how many fucking times do i have to tell you she doesn't want you, bro?"

chris raises his eyebrows at him, not even faltering from his words. instead, his eyes glance over to clementine to make sure she's not in the middle of them. she's taken a step away and is now stood against a counter with her arms crossed, so chris looks back to the atrocious beast in front of him. "oh, you speak for her now?"

"i do actually," jax responds without missing a beat, making chris scoff.

"that's not something to be proud of, bud," chris bites back, feeling the anger creep up his spine at the way he talks about her like she's an object so openly. "no one wants a controlling little bitch as a boyfriend."

"really? because you're the single one here, not me, bud," he uses the same mocking nickname he did and steps forward to get all up in his face when he says, "and who's gonna be taking her home tonight? because i know it sure as hell isn't going to be you." his voice is only loud enough for chris to hear, making his blood boil even more.

"oh, are you?" chris challenges, not afraid to get all up in his face as well. "because i can already smell the beer on your breath," he tells him quite plainly. "you wouldn't want to crash that car you spent all your daddy's money on, would you?"

'ooo's and 'ah's come from the somewhat crowd around them watching them and chris smirks at the way jax's face drops. he steps away from chris with anger written all over his face and chris knows he's won.

chris: 1. jax: 0.

"stay out of my fucking way, sturniolo," jax practically growls at him, not even bothering to come up with an actual response to what chris said. chris rolls his eyes and watches as jax steps away and turns towards clementine. "c'mon, baby," he calls for her, reaching his hand out for her to take.

clementine has to pull her eyes off of where they were on chris for her to even look at him, making chris smirk. once she realizes what jax said to her, her face scrunches up in the bad way—with disgust. she covers it up though, with a smile. she takes his hand and allows him to lead her out of the room.

chris tries not to feel defeated as he watches them walk away together. no matter how many arguments he wins against jax, he knows he'll never truly feel like a winner until he's got his girl rightfully back in his arms.

he's about to sigh and turn away when suddenly, he catches sight of clementine turning her head to glance back at him as they're walking away. chris instantly smirks at the way she chose to look back at him one last time. 'bye, baby,' he mouths teasingly, simply unable to resist.

clementine instantly rolls her eyes, but chris swears he can see a blush forming on her face before she turns her head back around.

"I HATE HER AND HER stupid blonde hair, and her stupid dumb face, and her dumb red lipstick, and her absolutely hideous dress, and her ridiculously ugly shoes, and her—"

"stori," chris cuts off the complaining girl sat next to him on the couch. "i need you to shut the fuck up."

astoria rolls her eyes in response to him, crossing her arms and leaning further into the couch cushion behind her. "you just don't get it, chris. she infuriates me. every single time i see her i just want to rip my hair out."

"i literally do get you though," he tells her, glancing over to her and now taking his turn to roll his eyes when he finds them staring daggers into bianca's back for absolutely zero reason. "that's exactly how i feel when i see clementine. just admit you want her."

astoria is instantly scoffing like he just said the most insane thing to ever be said. "that is the absolute most repulsive thing you've ever said," she tells him with disgust written all over her face. "i could never want her and her stupid fucking blonde hair."

chris blinks. "you're blonde too thou—"

"ugh, shut up, chris!" she cuts him off frustratedly, suddenly standing up from the couch and storming off. chris chuckles as he gets left alone on the couch by himself. astoria is one crazy gal.

his laughter dies down and he sighs, now adjusting to the comfort of being by himself. his eyes begin roaming through the crowds of people spread throughout the huge living room and it's no surprise when he manages to spot clementine in the very back. she's sat down on a chair in the corner of the back of the room as jax is busy playing some drinking game with all of his friends. chris frowns.

he begins internally debating how to somehow swoop in and save her like the hero he is when suddenly, his thoughts are cut off when some random girl sits down next to him.

he reluctantly takes his eyes off of clementine and glances over at the brunette girl, realizing how close she sat to him. "hi." she grins, chris instantly noticing how drunk she is.

"hi," he responds back shortly.

she's very straight to the point when she says all cheerily, "wanna make out?"

chris' eyes widen at her abruptness and clears his throat, managing a shake of him head. "oh, i'm taken, sorry."

"what?" her face falls, making him realize she already knows who he is. "since when?"

"since always," he shrugs, his eyes accidentally making their way back to where he knows clementine to be.

the drunk girl follows his line of view and scoffs. "seriously?" he doesn't like the disbelief in her voice when his eyes flicker back over to her. "by her?" she speaks questionably. "i thought you guys broke up like months ago."

"yeah," he nods his head before turning back to continue staring at clementine peacefully. "still hers though."

the girl next to him scoffs once again and looks over to clementine as well. this time, she raises her hand to point at jax who's currently taking a shot. "her boyfriends literally right there," she speaks obviously.

"i know," chris sighs, looking back at her and grinning because honestly, he can't help it. "what a challenge, right?"

when all the girl does is roll her eyes and get up to venture elsewhere, he isn't surprised.

( ☾ )

CLEMENTINE SIGHS TO herself as she's currently making her way up the staircase of this random guys house. she's just too annoyed with her drunk boyfriend right now. everything he says makes her want to die. she can't stand the slurred words.

she runs a frustrated hand through her hair and finally reaches the second floor, finding a sitting area before the hallway that leads to all the bedrooms and walking towards one of the couches.

she freezes though, when she finds matt currently leant against the wall next to the couch, busy scrolling through his phone with a red solo cup in his hand.

"oh," she accidentally says out loud. holy shit, why did she just open her mouth?

matt pauses, slowly glancing up to find clementine and awkwardly clearing his throat. "oh," he says the same thing, turning off his phone and sliding it in his pocket. "hey."

"hey," she responds shortly, not really sure what else to say since he's practically like a stranger to her now. she sighs and steps closer to him since they're talking now and glances down at the cup he's holding, raising her eyebrows. "you're drinking?"

"what?" matt furrows his eyebrows at first before realizing she's looking at the cup he's holding. "oh, no," he answers. "it's water. you know me."

clementine hates the way her heart does a little ping at that because honestly, does she? she gives a tight lipped smile. "i did once."

matt's eyebrows scrunch together at her comment, making her want to slap herself for even saying it in the first place. "what's that supposed to mean?"

"nothing." she attempts to shrug it off.

"no, what?" matt encourages to go on, making her sigh.

she takes in a breath before letting out something she never really planned on being honest about her feelings on. "you know, you guys all like to act like i'm the devil for never reaching out after chris and i broke up, but you never did either," she tells him, not even trying to be rude, just being honest.

matt's face falls and clementine suddenly feels like the air is even more awkward. this is a reminder on why she should never be honest about what she feels, she thinks.

she sighs and begins to turn around and walk away from this awkward interaction, when matts voice makes her freeze. "you're right."

she pauses, slowly turning back around. "oh?"

he takes in a breath, scratching at the back of his neck for a second before deciding to be honest too. "look, clementine, you think i've been cold towards you because i'm bitter, but that's.. not it."

clementines eyebrows raise, surprised on how he's even addressing how cold he's been. "what do you mean?"

"i get why you did what you did," he shrugs, catching her completely off guard. "i understand why you've changed so much."

"what?" she asks, almost in disbelief. "you do?"

"yeah." he nods. he takes in another breath before being honest once again. "i just..." he trails off for a moment, looking elsewhere so he doesn't have to look at her eyes. "feel guilty."

"what?" clementine is completely surprised by his words, looking at him like he's just told her he lives on mars. he sighs at the look she's giving him, but still, she continues questioning him. "why?"

"because i'm apart of the reason you're so different now," he shrugs.

clementine frowns, suddenly feeling defensive. "i'm not different now."

"you are," he tells her blankly, making her frown deepen. "and it's partially my fault."

"how would that be your fault?" she challenges him, just genuinely not getting where he's going with this. honestly, she's lucky he's even got his walls down with her right now since it's been so long the pair have even had an actual full conversation like this.

"you needed a friend—or at least a shoulder to cry on, and i wasn't there because i prioritized my brother over you," he explains, the guilt he feels becoming obvious from his soft tone of voice. clementine frowns as he goes on, "i was a bad friend and i didn't notice you had distanced yourself so much until you had already moved on with your life."

"oh..." she trails off, unsure of what else to say because she had no clue he ever felt this much remorse for how things ended for the group of friends. she notices the guilt written all over his face and sighs, "it's okay, matt. genuinely."

matt takes in a deep breath before letting his guard completely down with the girl he used to know like the back of his hand. "i'm gonna be honest," he starts, making her eyebrows raise before he continues on. "i miss you, clem," he tells her honestly, making her eyes immediately soften from his gentle voice. "nick's too hurt to admit it and 'stori's too stubborn, but i'm not," he explains. "you were like my sister, and i miss you."

clementine smiles at him, not realizing how much she had wanted to hear those words until she heard them. "i miss you too, matt," she tells him honestly, her heart feeling twice as big in her chest. "always."

"yeah?" he gives her a small smile.

"yeah." she nods her head, her smile growing soft.

the small smile he was originally giving her grows into one twice as big and he offers her one last sweet look before stepping forward to assumedly head somewhere else. "see you around, clem."

she grins, feeling lighter at the way matt, for the first time in a long time, feels like more of a friend than a stranger. "see you, matt."

after he's gone, she sighs. she decides she'd rather have some fresh air after that conversation than sit in this living room. she wanders through the hallways and finds the door to a balcony that wraps around the back of the house.

her eyes widen a little bit. she hadn't even known this house had a balcony.

her eyes widen a lot a bit. why is chris literally everywhere? why is he already on the balcony?

💌

had to do the double update for the cuntinatoes 🍅

matt + clem 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

chris dropping to his knees mid party like a psychopath 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

see ya next chapter 😏😏😘😉

<3
jaden