TWO. tape deck
THE SPRITE IN HER CUP was slowly going flat, but Lorraine didn't care much. It was a slow day for a Saturday, with the only customers inside the Dairy Queen being two boys that looked about 10 years old.
They were never especially busy, but on a Saturday in early September, people usually were eating as much ice cream as they could before it got too cold. She was the only person behind the counter. Shane, her manager, had offered to cut both her and Garrett, the only other person working, because of how empty it was. But Lorraine needed the money, so she let them both go and took on the responsibility of watching the store.
She had her calculus flash cards in her hand, absent-mindedly twirling her straw around the cup. She had a leg dangling off the counter where she was sitting, right by the till.
"I don't think you're meant to be sitting on the counter."
Lorraine knew Lottie, but she didn't know her well. They didn't have any classes together, but they were both on the JV soccer team from the time they were freshmen, and they both made varsity as juniors.
Lottie was always nice but Lorraine made almost a concious effort to make sure the two of them were never alone for longer than five minutes. She was a good player, and she'd never done anything to suggest she had a single mean bone in her body.
She was wearing a sweater despite the fact that it was nearly 80 degrees outside, powder blue and ribbed over the top of a collared shirt. Even in the air conditioned Dairy Queen Lorraine felt sweaty wearing jeans and a short-sleeved top.
"I don't think you're supposed to be in here," Lorraine said, aiming for an air of casual nonchalance. "We're closed."
"It's 10 am," Lottie said, tucking one of her dark curls behind her ear. "What if I want a blizzard?"
Lorraine hopped off the counter with as much grace as she could muster, which honestly didn't feel like enough. Not in her Hysteric Glamour t-shirt with chocolate sauce on the sleeve.
"What kind?"
Lottie ordered the first thing she saw on the menu and they stood there in silence while Lorraine made it. Lorraine never really knew what to say to Lottie, that was the main reason that she tried to limit their contact as much as possible.
Lorraine wasn't really friends with anyone on the soccer team other than Mari. They were all fine, but they were teammates, not friends.
She handed Lottie her ice cream, feeling like it would almost make her too big of a loser to tip it upside down. Lottie raised her eyebrows but didn't say anything.
Lottie threw down two bills and Lorraine went back to her studying, trying to make sure Lottie was unaware of how uncomfortable she was in this interaction.
Lottie came from money, everyone knew. She didn't brag about it, but there were signs, Lottie lived in Pineridge, the wealthiest part of Wiskayok, she drove a BMW to games, she gave out Tiffany bracelets at the end of every season. She didn't talk about having money, but everyone knew that she did. If she wasn't so nice and such a good soccer player then the other girls would probably all hate her, but she was, so they all pretended that she wasn't as rich as she was.
And there Lorraine was, wearing a visor and making her ice cream.
The boys left and it was just Lorraine, Lottie and Tara Kemp blasting through the shitty radio. Normally Mari would be there scabbing for as many free cheese curds as Lorraine was allowed to give her and then as many as $10 could get her. But since she was helping her dad with their garage, it was just the two of them, for some reason.
Lottie seemed to have no intention to leave, not even when she finished her blizzard. Lorraine didn't really care, not when they sat there in almost silence. She studied while Lottie did god knows what else.
Lottie left after a while and Lorraine finally put the bills in the register. There was a $5 for the Blizzard and the other bill was a $20 for her tip.
If it had been Taissa giving her a 400% tip she would have been a little bit ticked off. But Lottie was a lot nicer than Taissa.
The next time she saw Lottie was at practice the next day, and aside from a slightly longer smile in greeting, neither of them acknowledged the interaction.
Lorraine was working after school Monday and this time Mari did join her. Mari sat on a chair that she'd dragged right next to the register and ate chicken strips that were meant to be for salads, but Lorraine didn't really give much of a shit about it, so she let her eat them; she actually payed for them.
There was a BMW in the parking lot, but nobody got out of it. Mari went to the bathroom after about two hours and Lorraine used that as her opportunity, whipping up the same blizzard she'd made for Lottie earlier, and stood in front of the car.
Lottie looked up from her book, startled. "Oh, shit. You didn't have to," she took the ice cream with one hand and started rifling through her purse for her wallet.
"You payed for it last time," Lorraine shrugged. "$15 is still a massive tip. You're good."
She saw Mari leaving the employee bathroom, and gave Lottie another smile before ducking back inside. "Where did you go?" Mari asked, a handful of oreo crumbs in her hand. She tipped it back into her mouth and Lorraine shook her head.
"I went to go see your mom," she replied. Mari pestered her for another fifteen minutes and then got bored, leaving her alone. The next morning when Lorraine opened her locker there was a $10 bill inside.
She didn't really know why Lottie had taken a sudden interest in the Dairy Queen. Not even the owner had an interest in it, not since the '70s, at least. Training was ramping up in preperation for Nationals that weekend, and she didn't really have as much time to work as much as she used to.
She started sleeping at her own house more and more. She'd had to crawl out her bedroom window several times to avoid meeting her father in the living room, but she made it work.
Louisa sent Mari to school with extra food most days, concerned that Lorraine wouldn't be eating enough now that she was living at home.
Lorraine hated to tell her to stop, that she could afford to buy her own groceries. She couldn't, of course, but Louisa didn't need to know that. She'd arrive home to an empty house, empty rooms, empty closets, an empty refrigerator. Her few possessions that she'd either been gifted from Mari's family for her birthday or she'd saved up and bought with her own money were kept clean. Mainly because if she left anything of value out her father would pawn it.
That had been the final straw.
Her father had pawned the bracelet that Lottie had gotten her at the end of the season last year. She'd left it in the bathroom, wanted to take it off before she showered, and the next day her father had bought himself and every other patron at JJ's a round. The rest of the money he'd got from the pawn shop had been used to actually settle his tab. It was a $500 bracelet.
Lorraine had cried, not because she particularly liked the bracelet itself. But Lottie had tried to do something nice for her and she'd ruined it by being so careless. There was no way that she could ever earn enough money to pay Lottie back for the bracelet, or even just buy herself a replacement. It had LT engraved in it, and Lorraine had never received a gift like it. She probably never would again.
She knew Lottie's family could afford it, Lottie herself loved to show her love for the people around her, but Lorraine would have to save for over a month and that was if she got good tips. Most weeks she took home about $85, but depending on how well people had tipped her it could be anywhere from $60 to $100. In the first week of summer most years she'd make almost $250, and she literally buried it in a hole in the wall behind a poster of The Cranberries, keeping it in a shoebox.
If she got the scholarship and the early acceptance to Yale then this would be her last year in Wiskayok. She had been saving for the last four years at the DQ and the last six years babysitting her neighbour's daughters. After this year, she would be on her own and the house would really be empty.
She wondered sometimes if her father would even notice.
Every minute ticked down until the minute that she as able to move out. She was 18, she could technically do whatever she wanted anyway, but all her mail from school got sent to her place, the school required you to live within the district to go there, and if they found out that she had moved out, she'd most likely be homeless, and then it was goodbye WHS.
It wasn't high school she would miss, no, fuck that. But she would miss the Yellowjackets. Not the actual members of the team, probably not. To be honest, most of those girls were kind of bitches. But they were the best varsity girl's team in the state, and they just had to win state finals in three days to prove it.
She had her last practice before states the next day, and she knew Coach Martinez would decimate her if she was anything but her best, but Lorraine couldn't sleep. So, she took her car and drove to the only place she knew she wouldn't be disturbed.
The WHS parking lot. The likelihood of running into anyone that she knew in the parking lot of her high school at 3am on a Thursday morning was pretty unlikely. She would sometimes just come and sit in her car. She'd turn it off and bundle herself in blankets, her breath so cold that she could see it.
Her older brother had taken her here when she was only in middle school, they'd get in his car, just as cheap and shitty as hers and he'd tuck her in on the backseat, sitting on the floor between her seat-bed and the front seats. They'd listen to the tapes he had, mostly old sports broadcasts.
Michael's walkman was in her glove compartment, a collection of his old sports tapes still there. She hadn't touched it in nearly a year. Instead, she sat in silence, allowing herself to close her eyes.
Bright light hit the side of her face, and she squinted.
Lorraine thought for a second that she'd fallen asleep and was now definitely late for school. But then the light passed and she realised something equally as panic inducing. Headlights.
Could be the cops, if it was then forget nationals - she'd be kissing states goodbye. But then the car pulled up right beside her and Lorraine felt the stress physically leave her body. A silver BMW.
She glanced over at Lottie through her window, rolling it down. Lottie followed suit.
"You stalking me?" She was only half joking.
"No," Lottie said. Lorraine believed her. "I'm not upset to see you, though." That was all it took, Lorraine wrapping herself in blankets and slipping out of her car. Lottie unlocked the doors and she climbed into the passenger seat.
"What are you doing here, then?" She asked. The heat was on.
Lottie looked straight ahead. "I didn't really want to be at home," she said quietly. She glanced sideways at Lorraine. It was no secret that her mom had left, but that was where she'd stopped it. There were rumours, of course, that Jean was a hooker (untrue), that her father was an alcholic who beat her (half true), but no one knew the full story. Not even Mari. She already felt like she was mooching. "Sorry."
"Please don't apologise to me," Lorraine looked down at her lap. Her walmart pyjama pants against Lottie's real leather seats.
Now that Lottie wasn't looking right at her, she was close enough that she could really finally look at her. Lottie was quiet, she was kind, and yes she could be a bitch just like every teenage girl, but Lorraine had never noticed how sad her eyes were. "Fine, fuck you. I'm not sorry."
"That's more like it," Lorraine sat back. "I don't accept."
The time on the dashboard clock ticked over to 4AM. They had practice before class in 2 hours. Neither of them said anything.
────────── ⋆˚✿˖° author's note
i wrote this in my college library so that's how dedicated i am to homosexuality truly. i'm actually a fan of this chapter, i listened to a lot of baby queen while writing this and i honestly feel like 21st century! lottie would love baby queen, it just felt very much like her. i hope you enjoyed this!! only one more chapter and then state finals and episode 1 starts!! love u
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