A Chapter| Chapter Seventeen

"And this is my boyfriend, Rafe, who is a little camera shy." Lila laughed as she took her documentary, Rafe hiding his face with a pillow from where he laid under her.

"He didn't really like me at first but now i'm his favorite person, tell them." Lila said, pushing down on his rib slightly as he jumped as slapped her leg.

"Tell who?" he asked confused, moving the pillow to reveal his tired and messy hair.

"Tell the camera, when I get my own ghost hunting tv show people are gonna wanna bang me every chance they get, gotta show em i'm not on the market." Lila said, slapping his chest as he groaned and looked at the camera.

"She's not available, folks." he said, throwing Lila off of him as she took his place on the coach, turning her camera back around to face her as he walked off.

"See, Kooks aren't always that fun but I like him. You guys can meet Sarah pretty soon, she's my girlfriend." Lila said knowingly into the camera, giving it a wink.

"Lila, she is not." Rafe said in jealousy as he searched through the cabinets.

"She is, but don't tell him. See you later for some serious ghost hunting business, bye." Lila grinned, waving as she shut her camera off and sat up.

"Why do you like ghost so much?" Rafe asked confused, tossing her a granola bar as she caught it quickly and hummed.

"I dunno, I guess when I die I would want someone alive to care enough to try and talk to me, it's dumb but maybe they're lonely." Lila explained with a shrug of her shoulders, sitting at the bar as Rafe looked over at her with a grin.

"Wanna come golfing with me? I can teach you." he offered while reaching over to grab her hand. Lila raised a eyebrow with a hum.

"Can I drive the golf cart?" she questioned.

"No." he said sternly.

"Oh my god, this is so much easier then driving a car!" Lila cheered as she pushed the peddle of the expensive golf cart, throwing the two over a hill.

"All right, Lila, you're gonna wanna slow down a little right he-" Rafe began before Lila laughed as she turned the golf cart sharply, causing him to grip the sides harder.

"Where do we park?" Lila asked, waving at a old couple who looked at the two like they were crazy, swerving and speeding through the course.

"Right here! Right here!" Rafe said despite it not being the place he wanted to park, just wanting her to stop driving.

"That was so much fun." Lila giggled as she stopped the cart, putting it in park and turning it off. Rafe was out before she was, grabbing the clubs that were tied to the back as Lila waved at a few people.

"Lila, hey, focus." Rafe said, snapping his fingers at her to wave her over. Lila hurried over, the golfing outfit she borrowed from Sarah's closet fitting her perfectly, one of Rafes snap backs on her head.

"Woah, this is like in star wars!" Lila said loudly, waving the golf club around like a lightsaber, pretending she was frightening off people. Rafe slapped his forehead, grabbing her arms to lead her over.

"All right, stand, not like this, Lila, no, like this." he scolded her, kicking her feet apart and gripping the golf club in her hands, guiding her perfectly.

"Okay now you're just gonna wanna try and hit-" Rafe began, putting the ball on the ground, falling backwards as she hit it before he was out of the way. The ball flew yards away, a good hit.

"Woah! Babe! Did you see that?" Lila giggled proudly, looking down at him from where he sat on the golf course.

"Yeah, yeah, that was good." he said with a laugh, standing and deciding not to mention how she needed to wait until everyone was out of the way.

"That was powerful, I can just feel this hulk smash strength running through my veins." Lila explained with a shake of her arms, a grin on her face as Rafe shook his head at her, getting his own club to knock with hers.

"This place is gonna hate us." Lila said later on that night as she laid by Rafes side, looking up at the stars that formed above them.

"It's all right, my dad pays this place a shit ton." he explained with a sigh, his  hand reaching for hers as she toyed with his fingers.

"Your dads a jerk, i'd never kick you out." Lila said as Rafe chuckled at her words, looking over at the side profile who was focused on the stars.

"I'd hope not." he states, looking back up at the stars.

"You're lucky. Your moms seem to really love you, seem to appreciate the things you do." Rafe said, his eyes sad but she didn't notice, feeling his hand tighten around hers was enough to know.

"It seems that way but it feels like they're kinda controlling. I love them to death and i'm thankful for everything they've done for me but it just feels like they want me to be a certain way. Like they wanna pick my friends, pick what I do with my life, pick what happens to me and don't bother to ask what I want. Do you know what I mean?" Lila asked, looking over at him, already having him staring at her as he nodded his head.

"I guess I never picked up on that." he said with a blink, thinking Lilas home life was so perfect.

"Well I didn't think your dad was so bad until you started telling me all those things about him, now I hate him." Lila said as Rafe chuckled as her words, turning his body some so he was facing her more.

"Yeah, everyone does. It feels good to talk about it though, I never really do with anyone else." he said, pulling her hand closer to rest on his face, running small circles, a comforting acting they'd both got into.

"Everyone has A Chapter they don't read out loud." Lila explained with a small smile, letting him know it was okay, reassuring him it was fine.

"What's yours?" he asked her curiosity, scanning her eyes as he saw them go blank, sitting up quickly.

"Lila." he said worried, sitting up with her as Lila looked at him, guilt and pain dancing in her eyes as Lila exhaled.

"I can't say." she explained with a hard swallow, watching Rafe shake his head.

"Course you can, it's just me." he explained, shaking his head while reaching for her hands, waiting for her to put them in his. And she did.

"If I tell you.... you can't tell Sarah because that means it could get back to the pogues and I- I cant afford to lose them either." Lila said as Rafe nodded quickly, waiting for her to go on.

"Last year... on my sixteenth birthday, my moms got me a car. It was a cheap one but I loved it, it was exactly what I wanted. I had two friends, Sydney and Willa, we weren't friends for long but we just bonded so fast and they meant so much to me. And then-" Lila began, stopping herself as her eyes watered, the next words haunting her.

"What?" Rafe asked her, urging her to go on as Lila looked down for a second to pull herself together.

"And then I had a twin brother. Logan. He was two minutes older then me, he acted like he was two years older then me though." Lila laughed slightly, tears falling down her face as she whipped them away quickly.

"I didn't know you have a brother." Rafe said confused, trying to catch her eyes as Lila sniffled.

"Had." she corrected him, the pools of chocolate in her eyes meeting his ocean blue ones, the gloss and redness effecting the both of them.

"Logan never got his permit or license, he hated the idea of driving for some reason. I stayed on top of it though, I got my license the second I turned sixteen, so excited to drive this car that looked fifty years old with a shitty paint job." Lila paused her story, letting go of Rafe's hands to pull her legs closer to her chest, hugging herself as he sat up straight, ready to grab ahold of her if she needed it.

"And then i'm driving, i'm driving down a empty road where no one ever came down. It was dark and I didn't turn the headlights on, I didn't think I needed to. Logan was in the passengers seat, turning the radio up and switching songs every few seconds. Sydney and Willa were in the back, talking to me as we laughed at god knows what. And then because I didn't have the headlights on, I didn't see the stop sign , I drove right past it just as a truck was coming on my left." Lila explained, sobbing as she stopped the story, looking down into her lap as she squeezed her knees closer to her. Rafe blinked, scooting closer to her to rest his hands on top of hers, rubbing small circles, opening his mouth to speak but she cut him off.

"Sydney was impacted with the truck immediately, it hit on our side of the car, smooshing the two of us in. It killed her, immediately, they say so she didn't feel any pain." the blonde added in, gripping her boyfriends hands as she cried again, not even bothering to whip her face.

"Logan... he didn't have a seat belt on. He went straight through the window shield, he flew a few feet away. My moms didn't wanna tell me but he suffered, he didn't die immediately." Lila said before she couldn't take it, hyperventilating as her breathing was scarily uneven.

"Lila- Lila- hey, hey, hey, you gotta breath, take a breath." Rafe said worried, moving quickly to hold her, rubbing her back until she let out another sob, getting a breath in as her heart raced.

"I killed them, Rafe. It was my fault, it would have taken two seconds to turn on my lights, just two. But I didn't because i'm selfish and a idiot. And now my brother and Sydney are dead, completely dead, they aren't gonna come back." Lila spoke through her cries, leaning into Rafe as he shhed her, holding her body close and rocking her.

"It's all right." he tried to reassure her even though he knew it wasn't. Pressing a kiss to her forehead he let her cry like he did last night, doing exactly what she did to calm him down.

•••••
there's her backstory i've been hinting at the whole story. it made me sad to write it ngl:(