People. Humans. Celestial beings. Gays. Fanhumans. Do you realize what this is?
This is the fiftieth one shot in this book. The big Five-Oh. Like what the frick frack paddy whack bone crack chicken smack nickel back extra snack? Like this is insanity.

So, for this special occasion, here's a special (and meta) one shot.

(And I'm editing it later give me a chance)

•••

Jeremy has never had a hangover. Precious little boy has barely touched drink. But he imagines this feeling is like a hangover. A hangover times a million.

His head thumps sensations right down to his toes. His heartbeat is tuned out by high pitched ringing in his ears. His back, his knees, his shoulders, it's like his attention is drawn to every part of his body.

Jeremy's eyes flutter open. This . . . yep this is his bed. He knows his ceiling anywhere.
He peels himself from the bed, the headache pounding with every movement he makes. Now that he's on his feet, his room seems to look . . . different.

That poster looks new. And is that a new desk chair? The walls seem to be a different colour too . . .
Jeremt shakes his head, which turns out to be a bad idea considering he's more hungover then a lightweight on Spring Break. He stumbles out of his bedroom.
There'll be some painkillers in the kitchen. And walking to the kitchen isnt that hard . . . right?

And then Jermey nearly falls down the stairs.
Yay.

He manages to make it to the kitchen in one piece, where he successfully finds some painkills for his headache. And, hurrah, they don't work at all. He's about to make himself a mug of coffee to wake himself up, when his Dad interrupts him.

"Morning Jeremy" he yawns, walking into the kitchen.

"Morning Dad" Jeremy says, his voice raspy and hoarse.

"Wait a minute" Mr Heere halts, furrowing his confused brows. "Jeremy, shouldn't you be at work?"

Thank god he wasn't drinking anything, because he would've choked on it.
"Work?"

"Wow, you are super out of it today, aren't you?" Mr Heere grabs a bowl and a box of Lucky Charms. "Your shift at Five Star Rentals started half an hour ago. Remember? That new movie rental place?"

"Sure sure of course" Jeremy lies. "I'll get going . . . I guess . . ."

Jeremy abandons making coffee, instead taking his dads car keys from the counter. Lucky for him, he slept in his clothes. Sure, he smells like an armpit but that's the least of his concerns right now.

"Oh and Jeremy" Mr Heere calls after his son as he opens the front door. "Don't forget to thank Heidi for getting you that job in the first place"

Jeremy stops with one foot out the door.
"Who's Heidi?"

Mr Heere pulls a face.
"Wait did you take last night? Remember Heidi? Your stepmom?"

Jeremy's eyes go wide and his mind goes blank.
"St-stepmom?"

"You're gonna be late for work, Jer. Actually, you're already late for work. Just haul ass and apologize"

Jeremy closes the door behind him. Heavy breaths pant from his trembling lips. Stepmom. This Heidi person. His dad remarried.
Something is wrong. So god damn fucking wrong.

Jeremy drags over to his dads car, climbing inside. Five Star Rentals. His job?
Fuck it. I'll just drive around for ages. I'll find it eventually.

But then the weirdest thing- well, based on how the day is going, it's not the weirdest thing ever. Something strange happens. Muscle memory takes him right into town. Right outside a blue store front, with yellow block letters.

Jeremy stops the car, and he's almost out of breath. The bell above the door rings as he enters the store. It's a classic movie rental place. Rows and rows of DVD's and a counter at the back.

"Jermey! Damn, I thought you weren't gonna show up today"

A guy in a blue vest steps out from behind the counter. His long brown hair falls in front of his eyes. He makes his way over to Jeremy, and on closer inspection, the guy has black nails.
He claps Jeremy's shoulder, making the boy jump.

"Wow, you okay there?" His name tag reads Connor.

"Yeah. Y-yeah. I'm sorry who are you?" A panicked Jermey asks.

Concern falls over Connors face.
"You okay Jeremy? You need to go home?"

Jeremy's breathing quickens, alarms flying through his head.
"I'm so confused" he says.

"Are you hungover? What did you take?" Connor asks.

"I'm sorry, but who the fuck are you?" Jermey nearly hisses.

"I'm your boss, Jermey. My name is Conor Murphy" he explains.

Jeremy splurts out a laugh, surprising them both.
"Yeah. And I'm Heather McNamera"

Conor raises an eyebrow.
"Who?"

Jeremy rolls his eyes, relaxing. This is all a prank, simple as.
"Listen, I know you're not Conor Murphy. I'm not a dumbass, I'm a theatre nerd. So I know that Conor Murphy is fictional"

"Okay you're totally out of it" Connor sighs. "Since you're here, you might as well work. What about you pick up some coffee, yeah? I'll write down the order, you just have to go to the café and get it"

Jeremy nods, his panic gone. This is totally a prank. What's next, Jared Kleinman selling bathbombs on street corners?

Conor scribbles down an order on a scrap of paper, handing it to Jermey with a twenty.
"The cafe is just across the street, okay?"

Jeremy takes in Conor's concerned demeanor with a skeptical look.
"Sure"

He nods accusingly, before basically running out the store. As soon as he's out the door, two things hit him.
The first thing is the heat. The sun beats down in bullets. It has to be at least 400 degrees out here.
The second thing that hits him, is a person. He ran right into them, sending them both sprawling.

His butt hits the pavement, sending a jolt up his spine. He opens his mouth to apologize, but instead his jaw just hangs open.

"MICHEAL!"
Jeremy leaps off the ground, tackling his friend into a hug.

Micheal laughs loudly, relief washing over him. He hugs back tightly.
"Holy shit Jeremy I'm so happy to see you! Now get your ass up youre crushing me"

The lanky boy climbs up, pulling up his friend. The pair both look a mess. Micheals hoodie looks like he threw it on haphazardly, same with his glasses. His curly hair is an absolute mess.

"Today has been the weirdest day ever it's insane" Jeremy garbles.

"Yes! Same! Apparently I have a job! But my mom didn't tell me where so I've just been wandering around" Micheal admits.

"I work here, according to my dead. But that's not the weirdest thing. My boss, is Conor Murphy"

"As in the dead kid from Dear Evan Hansen Conor Murphy?"

"The one and the same. I work, for a fictional character-" realization hits Jeremy like a truck. "Dude. My dad said that I have a stepmom. Named Heidi. Evan Hansen's Mom is named Heidi"

Micheals jaw drops.
"Your brother is Evan Hansen"

Jeremy rubs his temples.
"I need drink. Apple juice drink, of course"

"Come on, we're not unpacking all of this here" Micheal grabs Jeremy's arm and drags him down the street.

"And where the fuck do you think you're taking me?"

"The best place ever. My basement of course"

•••

Micheals house is not the same.
The outside, to start, is painted light blue. It was never ever ever blue. This has got to be illegal or something.

Micheal pushes open the door like he thinks it's booby trapped. The door creaks loudly, really helping the atmosphere.
Micheal creeps into the house, gesturing for his friend to follow. The pair tip toe down the hallway, holding their breaths.

Why are they so scared? Not a fucking clue. With all the weird stuff that's going today, the last thing they want is another bombshell.

The basement door. It's three feet away. Relief begins to wash over them when a voice slices through the silence.

"Micheal? Shouldn't you be at work?"

Micheal halts, turning to face his confused mother. His jaw drops as he panics.
"I . . . i um uhh . . ."

His mom raises an eyebrow, before noticing a stunned Jeremy behind him.
"Oh hi Jeremy, didn't see you there. Don't worry, I'll get out of your hair"

She smiles a knowing smile, grabbing her handbag. She let's out an, "oh!", before producing a phone from her bag.

"Picked up your phone today, Micheal. All fixed and working. and Jeremy, are your family still up for coming over to dinner?" She asks.

"Uhhh yes?" Jeremy replies.

"I was going to make spending nice but Micheal here broke the oven. I hope they don't mind pizza and chips"

"I'm sure it'll be fine" Jeremy tries to reassure her.

"Okay, I'm off. Will be back soon with the pizza. Use protection!" She slams the door behind her.

Jeremy's face burns red as Micheals eyes go wide.
"Nope" Micheal throws up his hands. "Not going down that rabbit hole"

He leads his embarrassed friend to the basement, where they both crash on the couch.

"This can't be happening. This is just too fucking weird. First, there's fictional characters in real life, and then your mom telling us to use protection? What does she even mean-"

"Uh Jeremy?" Micheal cuts him off, holding up his phone.

The wallpaper is a picture of the two of them. Seems pretty normal, apart from the fact that Jeremy is kissing Micheals cheek, a rainbow flag on their shoulders.

Jeremy's eyes go wide. "You don't think . . ."

Micheal unlocks his phone and opens his camera roll. Selfies of him and Jeremy. Peace signs and thumbs up. And then, in all it's glory, a picture of the two boys kissing square on the lips.

"Woah . . ." Jeremy's lost for words.

"So we're-we're dating?" Micheal says.

"I don't think friends casually make out with eachother" Jeremy jokes, immediately regretting it.

Micheal raises an eyebrow, before gasping.
"Oh my god . . . MY MOM THINKS WE'RE GONNA BANG! Holy shit I want to die . . ."

"This has to be some sort of alternate reality, right? How else could we have jobs and know the characters from musicals and be dating?"

"This is fucking lunacy" Micheal rolls of the couch, landing on the floor.

Jeremy lies down on the couch, parallel to his friend- no, his boyfriend? Even thinking about it gives Jermey this weird sensation.

The lanky boy snaps his fingers.
"What if we're in another universe?"

"Bitchdafuq?"

"Think about it: how else could all this be real? The Dear Evan Hansen characters in real life, us dating. It must be a parallel universe. Either that or we're sucked into a fanfiction"

"Hey" Micheal says. "You know how Dear Evan Hansen is a musical, but obviously they don't know that their lives are a musical. What if, our lives are also a musical? And that's why we're paired up with DEH?"

Jeremy rubs his temples.
"That hurts my head. So much"

Micheals mom, Maria, gets home earlier then she thought. The two boys are still in the basement, trying to wrap their heads around the whole situation. She knocks on the door and calls them up.

Micheal gets up first, offering Jeremy a smile. Jeremy returns it, sending Micheal a psychic message of, "Come on. Let's do this"

The pair walk upstairs, sitting down at the kitchen table. Two large pizza boxes and a box of chips stand in front of them. They sit next to each other, Maria opposite them.

She raises an accusing eyebrow.
"Everything okay with you two?"

Micheal answers to quickly.
"Yep. Tooootally fine"

"You Guys haven't acted this squirrelly since you first told As that you're dating. And that was over a year ago"

Over a year. Jeremy clears his throat, reaching for a drink. It's like there's a frog made out of sandpaper in there.
His actions totally don't help their, "we're totally fine" act.

Maria says reassuringly and softly, "if you guys are broken up or having problems or something, you can tell me. It's perfectly okay"

"Don't worry mom, we're fine. See?" Micheal takes Jeremy's face in his hands and kisses him softly.

He only intendeds for the kiss to last a moment, but it stretches out. And damn, is he grateful for those extra seconds. Jeremy's cheeks are only tinted pink, and he's grinning like a fool.

Their eyes meet and don't pull away. Brown meets blue in total harmony- until the doorbell interrupts them.

"That'll be the Heeres. Don't worry I'll get it" Maria stands up from the table to get the door.

As soon as she's out of earshot, Micheal turns to Jeremy.
"Hey man I'm sorry about that. It was just to get her off our backs you know-"

"Micheal. Shut up. It's fine" Jeremy smiles.

A chorus of, "hello!"s fill the house. In steps Jeremy's dad, Paul, and a nice looking woman who Jeremy can only presume is Heidi. She's followed by a shy looking boy in a plain t shirt, with a cast on one warm-

"We're about to have pizza with Evan Hansen" Jermey breathes.

Everyone sits around the table, clapping the boys on the back and saying hi. Evan sits to Jeremy's right. Evan treefucking Hansen.

Everyone is quick to dive into conversation, grabbing chips and pizza slices. Even Evan starts talking to Paul like it's no big deal. Micheal notices how uncomfortable Jeremy is, and leans over to him.

"You know we can skip this dinner right? Pretend we're gonna fuck or make out or something" Micheal whispers in his ear.

Jeremy snorts, which turns into a coughing fit. His (boy?)friend slaps him on the back as Jeremy swigs down a drink.

"You okay there, Jer?" Heidi asks.

"Yep" He croaks, taking another drink. "Food went down the wrong way"

The dinner- if you can even call it a dinner- goes by fast. Everyone scarfs down food and chats happily. Soon, all the pizza is eaten and it's 1am. Social events last forEVER. As the Heeres start to say goodbye, Micheal offers Jeremy a lift home.

The pair get into Micheals PT cruiser, and follow Paul's car to Jeremy's house. They cruise down the quiet road in silence. The air hangs thick.

"Mind if I pull over?" Micheal asks.

Jeremy shakes his head. The car judders to a stop as he pulls in on the side of the road.

Micheal turns to Jeremy, trying to muster up the courage to say, well, anything.
"Listen Jer. This whole day has been fucking barbaric. Like whatever fanfiction we're in, it sure as hell is a shit one. But . . . um . . . damn I'm not really sure how to say this. Uh. I'm . . . glad that we're dating in this universe. Or story. Or whatever"

He looks down at his hands, panic screaming through his mind.

"You like dating me?" Says Jeremy's voice.

Micheal doesn't look up.
"I mean, we haven't really done dating style things at all today. I mean, we kissed, and I defiantly liked that-"

He winces at his own words, regretting saying too much. He doesn't notice Jeremy crack into a small smile.

"Are you saying that you like me, Micheal Mell?" He says cockily.

Micheal rolls his eyes.
"Well if you're gonna be a dick about it, then yeah. I guess. I think all I'm saying is that I don't mind if we're stuck in this universe if we're together. Like romantically"

Jeremy grabs Micheals face, startling the boy. He squishes his cheeks together as Micheals eyes go wide.

"Worst comes to worst, and we're stuck here" Jeremy smiles softly. "At least I got a boyfriend like you"

His cheeks burn red as Micheal starts up the car again. The drive back to Jeremy's house is peaceful, contrast to awkward. Jeremy starts to nod off, drifting into a relaxed sleep. He's completely knocked out by the time Micheal pulls into his driveway.

Being the gentleman he is, Micheal scoops Jeremy up in his arm, and quietly takes him into the house. He meets Paul at the top of the stairs, where he whispers that he's just gonna our Jeremy to bed. Paul gives him a thumbs up.

He lays his friend down on his bed, kissing him gently on the forehead.

"'Night Jer"

He gets up to leave, but Jeremy stirs.
"Get your ass back here you dick"

A startled Micheal creeps towards the bed. Jeremy grabs his hoodie and pulls him onto the mattress. He snuggles up under Micheals arm, before falling asleep again. Micheal smiles sweetly. He cuddles his friend until he also drifts off into a peaceful slumber.

"IT WAS THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT- TELLING ME WHAT YOUR HEART MEANT-"

The alarm on Micheals phone jolts the two boys from their sleep. Jeremy groans and tries to nuzzle back into Micheal, but the Filipino is already sitting up, grabbing his phone off the ground to turn off the alarm.

He freezes.

"Uhhh what noooww?" A cranky Jermey groans.

"Dude look"
Michels shows Jeremy his lock screen. The picture of when him and Jeremy got matching Pac Man tattoos. Now rainbow flag. No kissing on the cheek.

"Woah" Jermey sits up next to him.

Micheal opens his camera roll. No kissing or couple photos. Just memes and videos of them doing stupid shir.

Jeremt snatches the phone and opens google. He types in, Dear Evan Hansen.
Dear Evan Hansen is a stage musical with music and lyrics by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul, and book by Steven Levenson- reads Google.

"We're back? Out of the fanficiton?" Jeremy says, grinning wildly.

"We're home" Micheal smiles.

With a holler, Jeremy jumps into Micheals arms, tackling him into a hug. He pulls back only to kiss Micheal hard on the lips. When he pulls away, fear is drawn over his face.

Micheal just laughs at him.
"Dude, yesterday I confessed my love for you, and you're getting embarrassed over one little kiss? Come on, you can do better then that"

Jeremy wraps his arms around Micheals neck, pulling him into a deeper kiss with a smile. Micheal holds his waist and kisses him sweetly.

Jeremy has never been hungover, had sex, or even dated someone before. But with all the crazy shir that's happened to him in the last twenty four hours, this is the most normal thing he can think of. 

•••
*what the fuck did I just write*
Wasn't as Meta as I thought but don't worry, lots of Meta ones to come.
Seriously though. 50 one shots? At 23k reads? It's a shame that you can't see how much I'm freaking out right now.
Love you all so much and expect more weird stories in the future
- Avery <3