The first thing i noticed, was how heavy my head felt. A groan escaped my mouth as light blened my eyes. Some muffles reached my ringing ears. Was that voices? My sight didn't got any better, but at least the pounding in my head eased.

"Hope?" Echoed through my ears into my head for a thousand times. Like the words started to spin and fly around, bounce off of my skull and multiply. "Hope, you awake?" Again, they repeated repeatedly.

A slight breeze hit my skin as some noises I recognized as steps got softer which each one the person took.

Another time I started to open my eyes. It felt like I was having a hangover, though I never was really drunk. I suppose that's what a hangover felt like. Just maybe even worse. I rubbed my eyes and blinked multiple times to clear my vision. Obviously I was in my room, lying on my bed. The sun was shining through the window and painted golden shapes onto the ground. What a beautiful view.

Without a hurry, I sat straight up on my bed. My blanket slid down my upper body and landed on my legs. I don't remember covering myself with my blanket. Nor do I remember going to bed. I looked down. I wasn't even in my pajamas. How?

Before I could start to set up theories, my mom entered the room, followed by Elliot. A black arm string to support the shoulder where the bullet hit it. I bet a giant plaster is hidden under his shirt. "Honey, how do you feel?" "Huh?" Her voice still seemed to be far away, though the repeating stopped. Luckily. "I asked how you feel." She repeated.

Yeah, how do I feel, actually I didn't even know. "I don't know." "Mom gave you two of those pills, though you nearly choked on her attempt to give you water to swallow." "Elliot!" She said frantically and spun her head to my brother. "Ah" My lips still were a bit apart, but I couldn't care less.

"Mom did you accedantily gave me vodka to swallow the pills? Would explain why I choked." I blurted out. "What!?" Hysterically she spun back around to me. "Have you gotten insane? Why would you ask, or even assume that?" "I think I have a hangover." In disbelief, both Elliot and our mom looked at me. "I'm gonna call a doctor." With that, she left. "How do you know how a hangover feels like?"

"Well," I started "I can only assume how a hangover feels like, but head is pounding and that's what they all say." At that, he just palmed his face. "Scoot closer." "Why?" "Just do it, Hop."

A warmth feeling rushed through me at the nickname he gave me years ago. He hadn't called me that in a while, but as he wished, I scooted closer to him. "Closer." Again, I scooted a little closer. "Jesus, Hope, what don't you understand of 'scooting closer'" He said angrily, but I knew he wasn't really mad.

He stood up and approached me. As he stood right before me, he reached out with his hand. I cringed at that and slapped his hand away. "Ew, what is with you?" A very deep, annoyed sigh left his mouth. "You are being dumb. Hold still." I furrowed my eyebrows as he touched the side of my head, than the other one.

Pain shot through my head. I winced at the sharp pain and jumped back. "Dude, that hurt." I looked at him in disbelief. Why did he do that? "You hit your head." Than it made sense. I wasn't even hungover. Was that a good thing? Probably. "What now?" I asked, trying to get my brain to function through the, the what? Fuzziness? I don't know, but I know it was tiring to concentrate.

"I'm gonna tell mom. Stay here." He left and I looked around the room again. I don't want to go. This is my home. Even with the memories. Maybe moving would help Elliot, but not me. No therapist had asked me and said it would be good for me, though I wouldn't go see a therapist anyway. I was doing good by myself.

By now the golden shapes turned orange, meaning the sun was going down. Again? I kinda lost track of time by all that passing out. My eyes traveled to my nightstand. A package with the inscription 'Benzodiazepines'. The medication. Against my panic attacks. The one that my thoughts go away and let my head feel light. The ones that help me feel better.

They already were in my cicle, so I didn't have the urge to take one, but just in case I opened the small bottle and took a few out. As fast I could I hid them in my drawer and laid down again, facing the white ceiling. How often will I get the chance to look up there? After we move, I will have to let this place go. I don't want to, but I have to.

I sigh and heard moms footsteps going up the stairs. I know she will open my door in a few seconds, and, she did. "Honey, you hit your head when you passed out, the medication I gave you mixed with the pain you had wasn't the best combination, but the doctor said you should rest and it would be fine. Oh, and only take one of them at a time. How do you feel?" She started and never stopped.

I raised my hand, signaling her to listen. Not in a mean way, though. If I did that, I wouldn't have a hand anymore.

"Mom, I'm fine. Like, as fine as I can be with a hurt head, but you can leave me alone." Before she got mad, I added a 'please.'

"Alright, the doctor said it doesn't sound like you have a concussion or something and if you don't feel better tomorrow than you have to go, but okay, I leave you alone. Love you." She smiled one of her warm smiles, which you can only smile back to. "Love you, too."

She closed the door as I started my tv. I wouldn't call us rich, but we definitely had enough money to live a life with a few advantages. I continued to watch 'Outer Banks' until my eyelids got heavier by the second and I yawned now and there.

A little later than usual I went to sleep. The two pills I had must've still be working, 'cause I feel like I'm not thinking any thoughts. They just came and they left. And that was wonderful. Just a little, small peaceful smile entered my expression. Right now, I don't have to worry about anything. Nothing. Just, well, nothing.

//°°\\

A/n:
It may be a little while, but here is chapter four. I wasn't really motivated, but if everything goes as planned, the whole story starts to really evolve.

I can't wait to introduce Thomas to the story!

And I know this chapter isn't much, but it's a start to something.

Have a great day/night.

X WrittenBy09