[mystery gang]

Taetae:
y'all I had a dream where Jungkook asked me out but it turns out he was just an alien who wanted to obtain data on humans for his alien race who wanted to invade us and I don't know how to feel about this

YourHobi:
did u say yes

Taetae:
ur missing the main point of the story

Chocochip_kookie:
Tae I'm not an alien I swear

Handsome_face:
smth only a real alien would say

Chocochip_kookie:
rly
then what would a human say in this situation pray tell

Handsome_face:
I'm not gonna pray tell anything u alien

Blue_ribbon_mochi;
wow I can't believe Jungkook's an alien

YourHobi:
right?? so scary
even more so since he's in the same class as us

Handsome_face:
what if yugyeom is an alien too?

YourHobi:
I wouldn't put it past him

NamJune:
what's going on dudes

Handsome_face:
Joonie Jungkook is an alien can u believe it??

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
Joonie?

Taetae:
Joonie?

YourHobi:
Joonie??

Chocochip_kookie:
Joonie?

YourHobi:
hush alien
jin when did u start calling Namjoon Joonie??

Yoongi:
what's this?

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
(°o°；）Yoongi Jungkook is an alien !!

YourHobi:
no hold on Jimin we'll go back to that
Jin?? hellooo

Handsome_face:
it was an accident

Yoongi:
was it tho

NamJune:
lmao yoongs he did the same thing the other day 2

Handsome_face:
I what

NamJune:
at the cafe? u stopped by for lunch and called me Joonie when I brought u ur food

Handsome_face:
oh fvk u caught that
it was an accident 2 I swear

YourHobi:
JINNIE

Taetae:
r u sure u went there for lunch or did u rly go for snacc
insert wink emoji here

Handsome_face:
y am I in this group chat

Yoongi:
I ask myself that every day

YourHobi:
jinnie what were u doing at Namjoon's cafe huh

NamJune:
it's not my cafe lmfao

Handsome_face:
I was having lunch did u completely skip over that part

YourHobi:
I did yeah

*

*

[Hoseok and Seokjin private chat]

YourHobi:
u can tell me honestly here tho did u actually go to see Namjoon again

Handsome_face:
I did yeah

YourHobi:
I knew it

Handsome_face:
not a word in the gc do u hear me hobi

YourHobi:
yep yep

*

*

[mystery gang]

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
wait is that y u were laughing when u passed by me at work Namjoon?

NamJune:
yeah lol

Handsome_face:
I'm sorry I rly didn't mean to call u that it slipped out idek y

NamJune:
relax jinnie it's cool

Taetae:
Jinnie?

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
Jinnie?

YourHobi:
Jinnie??

Chocochip_kookie:
Jinnie?

YourHobi:
hush alien

Chocochip_kookie:
wtf with this discrimination

Yoongi:
u guys do realize joon was doing that as a joke right

Taetae:
or was he

NamJune has changed their name to Joonie

Yoongi:
ok Joon wtf

Joonie:
what I kinda like it
problem?

Yoongi:
should I change the chat name back to namjin wedding plans

Joonie:
ur hysterical

Yoongi:
thnks

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
can we go back to the first topic now??

Yoongi:
which is?

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
Jungkook is an ALIEN!!!

Yoongi:
oh that's right u did mention that

Taetae:
im sads
I trusted u Jungkook

Chocochip_kookie:
Tae it's not true I would never do smth like that

Taetae:
what ask me out

Chocochip_kookie:
no, lie to u about not being an alien

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
so u would ask him out then

Chocochip_kookie:
why tf is everyone here so quick to jump on this train

YourHobi:
what train

Chocochip_kookie:
u know what I'm talking about
nvm
I'm not an alien Tae

Taetae:
prove it

Joonie:
yeah prove it

Chocochip_kookie:
oh cmon Namjoon not u too

Taetae:
I'm waiting

Chocochip_kookie:
tae we've spoken in person i look human don't i
and I'm capable of laughter and emotion isn't that proof enough

Taetae:
I still don't believe u
I'll never believe u
because it can't be true
there's no way ur human
ur too
*puts on sunglasses*
out of this world

*

*

[Jimin and Taehyung private chat]

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
did u lie about having that dream and do all this buildup just so u could drop that one cheesy compliment

Taetae:
yeah
was it risky

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
no dw I don't think anyone would take u srsly at this point
esp jungkook

Taetae:
ok good lmao
I don't want him to find out

*

*

[mystery gang]

Chocochip_kookie:
only u could make me laugh at a joke so ridiculous tae

Blue_ribbon_mochi;
*loud coughing*

Chocochip_kookie:
u see this is the train I was talking about
ur jumping on it again

YourHobi:
I don't see a train I see a ship

Handsome_face:
choo choo

YourHobi:
that's a train sound Jin

Handsome_face:
toot toot

YourHobi:
that'll work

Yoongi:
so is Jungkook not an alien then

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
I guess not Yoongi

Yoongi:
disappointing