[mystery gang]

Taetae:
SOME CREEP WAS TRYNA HARASS JIMIN 2DAY

Handsome_face:
what??

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
cmon Tae u didn't have to say that in the group chat...

Yoongi:
what's going on?

Taetae:
(;́・д・) it was so freaky, yoongi !!
jimin and i were just minding our own business walking back to the dorms after getting something to eat and this weirdo just stumbled outta an alley and latched onto him,,
and then just started saying weird gross things and tryna get jimin's number and i'm pretty sure he was drunk and i wanted to punch the creep but jimin told me not to and we managed to peel him away anyway so we just bolted

Yoongi:
wtf
i would've punched him in the face anyway
drunk or not thats disgusting

Handsome_face:
oh the irony of u saying that Yoongi

Yoongi:
what?

Handsome_face:
nvm lmao

Yoongi:
yeah wtvr
jimin r u ok?

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
yeah im ok...

Yoongi:
if he ever comes back let me know
i've always wanted a good excuse to bash someone with my fist

Joonie:
easy there yoongs we don't want u going to jail now

Yoongi:
i wouldn't go to jail 4 retaliating against a pervert who tried to harass someone

Joonie:
u would if u killed them

Yoongi:
i never said i would kill them
just teach them a lesson
a very firm lesson
not to hurt jimin

*

*

[Jimin and Taehyung private chat]

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
my heart feels very warm right now

Taetae:
mine does 2?? but like, 4 ur sake?? if that makes sense

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
yeah i get what u mean

*

*

[mystery gang]

Yoongi:
but rly tho r u sure ur ok jimin?

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
yeah, i'm ok

Yoongi:
ur not just saying that, r u?

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
:) no rly, yoongi, i'm ok

YourHobi:
smth happen?

Yoongi:
jimin got harassed by some creep and if he comes back again he's a dead man

Joonie:
yoongs u said u wouldn't kill him...

Yoongi:
changed my mind

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
yoongi pls don't kill anyone

YourHobi:
wait is this for real?? jiminie u were harassed??

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
im alright tho dw hobi :)

YourHobi:
(；☉_☉) ok i just caught up on what i missed and wtf that sounds scary af,,

Handsome_face:
yeah ikr?? glad ur ok tho jimin

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
thanks u guys :,)
it's rly sweet of u to be concerned

Yoongi:
its cuz i care about u jimin
*we
fvk
well i'm included i guess
so i don't really need to correct myself
but i did anyway
so here we are

Joonie:
smooth

Yoongi:
shut it walnut

*

*

[Jimin and Taehyung private chat]

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
if u listen closely u can hear me screaming

Taetae:
oh i hear ya jiminie
I still wanna be a godfather btw just putting that out there

Blue_ribbon_mochi:
ahgdjahsstop

*

*

[mystery gang]

Handsome_face:
I can imagine u socking someone in the face Yoongi
tbh u kinda look like u wanna punch a lot of ppl in our class lmfao

Yoongi:
can u blame me

Handsome_face:
honestly no
they can get pretty obnoxious
but also
would u legit do that

Yoongi:
what, punch someone in the face

Handsome_face:
yeah
for Jimin

Yoongi:
of course
Jimin doesn't deserve to deal w/ the garbage ppl of this country
not that I'm saying everyone in south korea is garbage but u know what i mean
but also yeah
I'm not kidding jimin if that creep or any other creep decides to show up again hmu I'll break some teeth

YourHobi:
wow
I wish I had someone who would willingly break someone's teeth for me

Handsome_face:
hobi id break some teeth 4 u

YourHobi:
yeah probs ur own

Handsome_face:
I take that back

Chocochip_kookie:
im here wuts going on

Yoongi:
jimin was harassed by some creep and if he comes back again i'll kill him twice

Joonie:
yoongs...

*

*

[Namjoon and Yoongi private chat]

Joonie:
I was debating on whether or not I should tell u
but now I feel like I should given the situation

Yoongi:
wtf r u talking about

Joonie:
the irony Jin mentioned earlier

Yoongi:
?

Joonie:
yoongs
that night at my house
when we watched the movie and then got pizza afterwards
u accidentally drank a bottle of champagne
it was a small one, not like those really tall bottles honestly I'd be scared if u drank an entire one of those lmao

Yoongi:
I don't remember that

Joonie:
yeah
u also don't remember clinging to Jimin like he was ur last breath of oxygen and then proceeding to fall asleep on his chest with your arm draped over his stomach

Yoongi:
very funny Joon

Joonie:
yeah
funny

Yoongi:
Joon
Joon pls
pls tell me ur only joking
please

Joonie:
it was rly cute actually
"Angel, my angel Jimin, protect me from Joon..."

Yoongi:
this isn't funny Kim Namjoon I'm actually freaking out right now
why
why did u let me drink champagne
I don't even like champagne
and right now I'm starting not to like being alive

Joonie:
u thought it was soda water

Yoongi:
how tf did I mix those up

Joonie:
idk man

Yoongi:
I hate this
I'm never gonna come out of my dorm again
I'm so ashamed
poor Jimin
how tf am I ever s'posed talk to him or face him ??
ffs I hate that I can't remember anything
if me putting my hand on his thigh that one time didn't weird him out then this definitely did
I'm no better than that fvkn creep who harassed him today

Joonie:
yoongs pls
u know that's not true
and jimin knows that's not true
don't be so hard on urself
u didn't do anything weird
I'm telling u it wasn't creepy it was cute
Jimin wasn't disturbed he was just embarrassed, ok?
so pls yoongs just relax

Yoongi:
seokjin said the thing about what I said being ironic
does that mean he saw
did everyone see

Joonie:
maybe

Yoongi:
did I kiss him

Joonie:
that depends
what do u want me to say

Yoongi:
kill me
now

Joonie:
lmfaooo u didn't kiss him I'm just kidding

Yoongi:
ur a dead man Namjoon

Joonie:
y r u so violent...