AND YOU WON'T WANNA LEAAAVVE AFTER TONIIGHHTTT (join us 4 a bite reference 😻)

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Thoma

"Uhm..."

"No! Nuh-uh!"

"I see what you're trying to do here!"

"You're trying to flirt your way out of this. You're gonna trick me, and then you're gonna tie me up against a pole naked and you're gonna leave me for the rats!"

(this was totally not a heathers reference from the song beautiful)

You

"No."

"I genuinely mean it. You're cute."

Thoma

"... I'm not taking that truthfully! You've got the highest bounty in all of Teyvat, why the fuck should I trust you?!"

You

"Because I haven't killed you yet."

Thoma

"Hm. There's the keyword, 'yet'. No way will I ever trust you."

You

"Aw, man."

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"Thoma, don't move."

Thoma

"... Why? You gonna kill me now?"

You

"No-"

You stood up, your gaze fixed on the tiny object on the ground directly behind Thoma's feet. When you approached him, he took a nervous step backward, crushing the small thing on the ground with his weight.

You

"... Are you fucking kidding me? I said don't move!"

Thoma

"You scared me!"

You

"All I did was stand up and walk two steps! You fucking broke my necklace!"

Thoma

"... I did?"

"Sorry..."

He turned around and took a few steps away from the shattered necklace.

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"Wait- No! I'm not sorry, you're a criminal!"

You

"I don't fucking care if you're sorry or not."

Thoma watched you crouch and pick up the little shattered pieces of your necklace's charm. He just stood there awkwardly.

Thoma

"Uhm..."

"It's just a cheap necklace, Y/N..."

You

"Yeah, well it was important to me. And you fucking broke it."

Thoma

"..."

You

"Sick bracelet."

You told him all of a sudden. Confused, he looked at his wrist, and the bracelet he expected to see was in your hands.

Thoma

"Oh, you sick fuck..."

You

"You wouldn't mind if I keep it, right?"

"It's just a cheap bracelet after all."

You said, playing around with it and admiring it as you slid it on your wrist.

Thoma

"Hey- You stop it. Give that back."

"Ayato gave that to me."

You

"Your sugar daddy?"

Thoma

"He's not my- Agh! You're so annoying!"

You

"You can get this back if you can fix my necklace."

Thoma

"You're joking! That thing's long gone, do you see the number of pieces it shattered into?!"

You

"Not if you can fix it."

You eyed the gathered shattered pieces on the floor.

Thoma

"Well, I'm not gonna do shit for you!"

You

"Then you don't get this shitty bracelet back."

Thoma

"The least you can do is give me my all my shirts back! It's what I came here for!"

You

"Okay? You're not getting them back. So, you came here for nothing."

Thoma

"You're such an asshole."

You

"So are you."

Thoma

"I can't believe I slept with you!"

You

"I only slept with you to hide from the police."

Thoma

"... Really?"

You

"What, did you think I slept with you because I wanted to?"

Thoma

"Well... Kinda, yeah."

You laughed and rolled your eyes.

Thoma

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"I'm not leaving until I get my stuff back."

You

"I don't care. Stay as long as you like; at least the police won't be out to get me anytime soon."

Thoma

"Hmph."

Thoma simply sat in the cave's corner as you returned to your bed, getting cozy and snug for a nap.

-A FEW MINUTES LATER-

Thoma

"... Fuck..."

He believed the blood would have stopped trickling from his skull by now. Thoma got up, swayed around, and fell right into the pile of stolen goods. He started rummaging through it and found one of his shirts.

You

"What are you doing?"

You asked, turning around to face him while still lying in bed.

Thoma

"I... I just need to cover my head up..."

You

"Use this. It's better than a shirt."

You tossed a few rolls of gauze at him, along with a towel.

Thoma gasped dramatically.

You

"... What?"

Thoma

"You're being nice to me!"

He said while cleaning up the wound on his head.

You

"Yes. I am being nice to you."

Thoma

"Why?"

You

"Because you haven't run away."

Thoma

"So... Does this mean you're not gonna kill me?"

"Can I go now?"

You

*Sigh*

"Thoma."

Thoma

"Hm?"

You

"You broke my necklace. So-"

Thoma

"I'll buy you a new one! I'll buy you a new one!"

You

"... This thing's like 1000 years old. It's not sold anywhere anymore."

"Let me speak."

Thoma

"Sorry..."

You

"You saw the charm you stepped on, right?"

Thoma

"Yeah?"

You

"You're gonna go find me another one."

Thoma

"What?!"

You

"Yes. You heard me."

"Go find me another one, and I won't kill you."

"If you can't find it, then womp womp."

Thoma

"Come on..."

"Well- Where do I start?"

You

"It's a rare gemstone, only found in the depths of Teyvat."

"... Though, the one on my necklace was told to possibly be 'the only one left', I've never really believed in that."

"Therefore, I'll use you to go find me another one."

Thoma

"Mmh..."

He groaned.

Thoma

"Will you come with me?"

You

"..."

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"Sure. I'm bored."

Thoma

"Really?!"

You

"Yes. I'll go with you."

Thoma

"Uhm... Right now?"

You

"No. I'm tired."

"I will sleep now."

Thoma

"Does this mean I'm good to go?..."

You

"Will you tell people of my whereabouts?"

Thoma

"... No."

You

"Okay. I trust you."

Thoma

"You're trusting me this easily?!"

You

"Are you saying I shouldn't?"

Thoma

"No!- I meant like... Like-"

You

"Okay then. I do not trust you."

"You're not allowed to go."

Thoma sneakily smiled.

Thoma

"So I get to sleep here?..."

"In your bed?..."

"With you?..."

You

"No. You're going to sleep on the floor."

You said, turning around in your bed, facing the wall of the cave.

Thoma

"Whaaat? Seriously?"

"You don't wanna sleep with me again tonight?"

You

"No."

"Goodnight Thoma."

Thoma

"..."

"Why is everyone so scared of you?"

You

"Why are we talking about this?"

You turned around again to look back at Thoma.

Thoma

"Because I'm not scared of you. You're cool."

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"Well, I was scared of you. But now that we've talked and now that I remember what went down last night-"

You

"What went down last night is not that serious."

Thoma awkwardly chuckled.

Thoma

"The point is, I don't understand why you scare so many people when you act like this."

You

"Maybe it's because I steal from and commit arson in their city? I don't know though."

You said sarcastically.

Thoma

"Right."

"... Well why do you do it? For fun?"

You

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"Because they hate me."

Thoma

"Why?"

You

"Because-"

You cut yourself off and gave yourself some time to think.

You

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"I don't like this topic. Can we talk about something else?"

Thoma

"Oh, that's okay. Sure. What do you want to talk about?"

You

"You. Let's talk about you."

"You're interesting."

Thoma

"You want to talk about me?"

You

"Yes."

Thoma smiled.

Thoma

"What do you want to know about me?"

You

"Just tell me anything."

Thoma

"Hah. Okay."

"I'm not actually from Inazuma. I was born in Mondstadt and just happened to wash up along the shore here after a boat crash."

"Let's see... What else is there..."

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"Ooh! I'm a housekeeper for the Kamisato residence. Ayaka and Ayato are pretty cool."

You

"Hm. I know that already."

"That's why last night, when you approached me, I thought you were out to get me."

"Y'know, since you work for such people. But I guess I was wrong."

Thoma

"Hah, well, I was drunk, and I couldn't recognize you that well."

"... Hm... Well even so, if I were sober, I probably still wouldn't be able to recognize you. I didn't really know who you were until today!"

You

"I know. Continue."