An uneventful Friday night and Jimin was in his room, mindlessly scrolling through his phone, which he decided he would do until he grew tired enough to go to bed. Fortunately, he was starting to feel sleep tugging at his eyelids, however was sadly startled upon receiving a sudden text from Yoongi, interrupting the quietness with a sharp ding.

Yoongi:
hey jimin

me:
what

Yoongi:
nothing really, just wanted to say hi is that so wrong

me:
i didn't say that
i was just wondering why u texted

Yoongi:
lol
well i guess maybe i did have a reason
just cuz i realized that tomorrow is gonna be really boring
so i was gonna ask if u wanted to do something
ya know, so it's not so boring

Of course, just to spite him, Jimin's mind replayed the memory of the last time he had been to Yoongi's house, the unexpected kissing that he'd ended up parting with.

And it wasn't that he expected it to happen again. But with slightly pink cheeks Jimin replied:

me:
i guess...
it's not like i have anything better to do...

Yoongi:
ok cool
ya wanna just stop by my house some time tomorrow morning

me:
wtvr

Yoongi:
k see u then

It was still a bit weird to him. Well, maybe weird wasn't the right word, but Jimin wasn't about to deny that acting completely normal around Yoongi after some of the things that had happened between the two of them wasn't the easiest. But he knew he had to. He had to maintain as normal a composure as possible, to go back to how he had been when the two were just friends hanging out, because that's what they were supposed to be doing now. Just friends.

Who may have cuddled and kissed a few times.

It was just so freaking difficult. Just to think about those things, and then realize that the next time they met again, Jimin would have to act like it didn't happen.

He didn't know how long he could suppress it. Or if he would have to forever, or if fortune would smile upon him for once in his life. Then again, even if that were to happen, the boy would still have the issue of getting over his whole "not being deserving of Yoongi" mentality, which would certainly be an obstacle.

Attempting to push the heavy thought aside, Jimin set down his phone, lay down in bed, and went to sleep.

***

He woke up earlier than usual, without an alarm since it was Saturday and he had no reason to be up incredibly early, yet at just a little before 8 am he found himself getting dressed for the day. And he nearly forgot, only recalling once he was about to pick something to wear, that he had agreed to going over Yoongi's house that morning.

After putting on his jeans and t-shirt he sat down again and took out his phone.

me:
gonna walk over now
just a heads up

He didn't wait for a reply, because Yoongi had already told him he could head over when he wanted, and Jimin assumed the response would be something like "k" anyway. So he tucked his phone into his back pocket, slipped on his shoes and leather jacket, and went on his way, leaving his father, who was in the kitchen, with a brief "going to a friend's, I'll see you later."

With that, his walk began. Down around ten or so blocks, which really wasn't all that far away, past The Golden Spoon, several strings of houses, a library Jimin hardly went to, and a convenience store he used to visit a lot with Jihyun when they were younger.

He hadn't been there in at least six years.

It was on the block just before Yoongi's house, actually. Jimin ended up slowing his walking pace considerably at that point. He thought about stopping by, but eventually decided against it, wondering if he were being waited on and hating the thought. So he approached Yoongi's door and knocked on it. But just gently.

It was loud enough, however, to be heard by the nearest set of ears. Which Jimin hoped would be Yoongi's.

"Orange kid!"

Riyeon, the mint-haired boy's older sister, with her blonde hair pulled back into a neat ponytail, answered the door with a pleasantly surprised smile. Jimin froze up.

"Wasn't expecting you to drop by. Jimin, right?"

Having no words, Jimin gave a tentative nod.

"Thought so." She also nodded. "Hey, so Yoongles' is out right now but he should be back any minute, so why don't you come inside and make yourself comfortable?"

He didn't know why he took her up on the offer—maybe it was her amiable nature, the friendly words and demeanor—but Jimin soon was taking baby steps into the house, then waiting by patiently as Riyeon began preparing a cup of coffee for him without him having asked.

She was kind.

"Here ya go."

Handing him a glass mug, the woman flashed another smile at the boy who thanked her in a soft voice. Then he raised the mug to his lips to take a sip: hot, refreshing, but just a bit bitter for his taste. Luckily Riyeon pointed to sugar and creamers she already had sitting on the counter. Jimin thanked her again and helped himself.

"Does Yoongi know you were comin' over?" She asked.

"He does," Jimin replied. "He invited me. Said I could stop by any time in the morning." Sighing, he shifted his eyes to the left. "Kinda expected him to be here..."

"Like I said, he should be back any minute now," Riyeon assured the boy. "He just went to the post office to mail something to our mom. It's not far from here."

It took a moment to register. And then a bit longer to evaluate.

"Doesn't...your mom live here?"

"No, our parents are divorced," Riyeon said casually, as she opened the refrigerator to retrieve something.

She wasn't joking. Of course she wasn't, Jimin knew she wasn't, yet still that was his instinctive assumption, because something from months before argued with Riyeon's response.

"But Yoongi told me one time..." He hesitated. "...his mother had been out of the house, shopping..."

Riyeon turned to him. Whilst tightening the lid of her water bottle, she furrowed her brow, pursing her lips, evidently puzzled upon hearing this. However soon, her expression relaxed a bit, as she replied, "Well, that's not true. Don't know why he would tell you that. Well-" She stopped herself mid-sentence, then sighed gently. "-I guess I get why, but at the same time he didn't have to lie to you, he could have just spared the details. But hey, that's between you and him. Point is, our mom doesn't live here, and hasn't for over a year. And I can't say I miss her, I'll be honest with you."

She must have realized quite soon that it might have been an awkward or uncomfortable note to end on, so she quickly made up for it with another reassuring smile that almost worked on Jimin. Almost.

"I gotta leave now," she said. "Our dad went in to work early today, so you'll be the only one here. But I'll tell you what, I'm going in the direction of the post office so if Yoongles for some reason is still there, I'll drag him back by his ears, 'k?"

Jimin forced a small smile in return, waving shyly to Riyeon as she exited the house with a cheery "I'll see you 'round!"

He wasn't cheery, though. In any way. And he felt odd, just sitting there on the living room couch of a house that wasn't his, waiting for the boy who had apparently lied to him about something he wasn't expecting to be upset over. Maybe it was that comment of Riyeon's. Or simply the fact that Yoongi had lied to begin with. Whatever it was, it settled unpleasantly in Jimin's chest until the moment the front door opened again.

In walked the unsuspecting Yoongi--unsuspecting in the sense that he didn't know about what Jimin and his sister had briefly talked about, he did know Jimin would be here, because Riyeon had so firmly urged him to hurry back to the house and not leave his "shy, incredibly handsome friend" all alone.

"Sorry, Jimin," he said, slipping out of his sneakers and leaving them by the door. "I wasn't expecting you to be here this early. Hope you weren't waiting here too long."

For some time, there was no reply, and with every second that passed Yoongi inched closer and closer to the realization that something was wrong, that there was something he was supposed to say, or ask, or do.

"...does your mom live far away, Yoongi?"

Jimin's question answered all his questions. And Yoongi didn't say anything at first. He paused a moment, then made his way over to the boy and sat down beside him on the couch.

"She moved to Incheon," he replied. "So pretty far."

"I see..."

"Mhm."

"Yoongi?"

"Yeah?"

"Why didn't you tell me your parents were divorced?"

"I don't know, to be honest with you."

It wasn't the answer Jimin had expected. Then again, this was another one of those occasions in which Jimin didn't really know what he did expect. He pressed his back against the couch. It wasn't easy to get comfortable right now.

The atmosphere was tense, not lighthearted, certainly not ideal, and certainly not what Yoongi had in mind when he had asked Jimin to hang out. But here they were now. And Yoongi wasn't about to dodge around this bullet he felt he needed to take at some point.

"I shouldn't have lied," he said under his breath, shamefully. "Really, I had no reason to. I guess, just...in my mind I didn't want you to know the story behind the whole issue, but that wasn't an excuse for me to lie. So yeah..." He cleared his throat, glancing at Jimin but the boy was still facing forward and staring at his hands. "...my parents are divorced."

"Has it been long?"

"Not extremely long. It was around the time I came out, so...a little over a year."

It was then that Jimin faced him--slowly, and with sad eyes that had already connected some of the dots. At least, it's what he was assuming. He didn't want to be right. He didn't want to ask, either, because even the question, even the thought sounded depressing. Instead he allowed his gaze to linger on Yoongi for a bit longer, watching bitter remembrance dawn on the boy's pretty face.

"My mother was...never really the kindest person." He inhaled gradually, deeply through his nostrils, letting his breath go even more gradually, deeply. "She yelled more often than she needed, she was never patient with anyone, she'd hit my sister and I from time to time, she was strict with how she wanted things to be, even people to be. Not open-minded in the slightest form of the definition. Nothing like my father. She was always on her feet, always barking about this or that, whereas my father was and sill is such a patient and easygoing man."

Yoongi's tone had softened at the mere mention of his father. But it toughened again with emotion when he changed subjects again.

"The day I came out to my mom was the worst day of my life."

If he hadn't been already, Jimin was fully attentive now. So much so that he didn't even notice his fingers now brushing against the other boy's hand.

"I told her," he said, "and she didn't hesitate to start screaming at me. And she grabbed my arm and gripped it so tightly it bruised, and she shouted at me, so loudly, so aggressively that my dad heard it from outside, and by the time he came inside I was an absolute mess, and so was Mom, and everything just-"

He took a moment to get himself together. By the looks and sounds of it, it was far from an easy task.

"...she and my dad got into a fight, a loud, hellish fight that honestly made me wish I hadn't told my mom, especially since the end result was her demanding a divorce."

Jimin's hand moved on its own to intertwine with Yoongi's.

"It seems like a harsh escalation," the mint-haired boy whispered. "But there was a lot going on behind the scenes. It wasn't just me coming out as gay that made her want to leave. My dad told me the two of them had been going through some issues for years, some Riyeon and I knew about, some we didn't. One of them was that my mother didn't think she was raising me right. She thought she went wrong somewhere, because her only son was just this unresponsive, despondent, angry boy who didn't care about school or...anything at all, really. I was a disappointment in her eyes. And it frustrated her that she didn't know how to fix me, rather, that I didn't let her 'fix' me, not through her words, not through..."

His voice tapered off.

"...she blamed me."

Yoongi squeezed Jimin's hand.

"I blamed me."

Sighing raggedly, he drew in another shallow breath, struggling to maintain stability in his voice.

"My dad told me it wasn't my fault, and that he believed he stopped loving her the day she first hit Riyeon and I...but y'know, a part of me still suffered from the guilt of it. Even if I weren't fully to blame, I was what spurred on her final decision. And I told this all to Hobi the same day I came to school wearing that rainbow sweater, and he had already hated my mom before then, and this just turned it full force..."

It was such a heavy, regretful silence. The boys' hands were clasped together still, with neither of them thinking much of it at the time, because it had been initiated without thought. Just feeling.

"Even with all the terrible things she did and said to me, she's still my mother. And I love her. Just, maybe not quite enough to want her to stay and drain our family more than she's already done. Especially my dad. I owe him everything."

"And I owe you everything."

It caught Yoongi off guard. He turned to Jimin, eyes widened just a bit, and he locked gazes with the other boy, and tender, but firm, Jimin held that gaze of his.

"Let's kiss."

"W-" Yoongi's cheeks flushed. "Jimin, what's...what's gotten into y-"

"You look depressingly sad, and it makes me sad, and I don't like that, and you look like you could use a distraction, and when I needed one you-"

"Okay."

Jimin tensed. Yoongi leaned closer.

"Let's kiss, Jimin."

Pressing soft lips on soft lips, they kissed each other, pouring out love without the other knowing, but they, themselves, knew that it felt so right. This was the third time now. Jimin wondered if it would only become more natural for them as time went on. It was already starting to feel that way.

One tear fell from Yoongi's eye. But after that, sad and bitter turned to warm and sweet, as the kissing continued, heartbeats quickened, and the two boys just falling even more in love with each other.

Natural...it truly did feel so oddly natural now.

The so-obvious-fools-in-love that shut out logic completely.

Just two empathetic hearts, beating together, knowing, understanding each other.

Two pairs of lips, not wanting to leave the other alone...

*

*

a/n:
it's late lmao but i wanted to finish this so it's lazily edited but done oOf ❤️