Earlier that Friday

-

"Hey, Seokjin, can I talk to you for a second?"

It was right before PE when Namjoon approached Jin again, tentatively, not with the usual confidence he had been approaching the boy with when asking him out. Of course, that wasn't his goal this time. And though Jin had a feeling it wasn't, the other boy still felt the need to clarify.

"Don't worry, I'm not here to ask you on a date," he said, holding his hands up almost as a guard, and he laughed gently.

"I know," Seokjin replied. He gave a small smile. "Did you need something?"

"Not really." Namjoon bit the inside of his cheek. "I'll leave you alone in a minute, I, uh...just wanted to apologize again."

Jin opened his mouth to argue but was promptly cut off.

"–and before you say anything, I was absolutely in the wrong, so just let me say this." Namjoon sighed, shaking his head in shame. "Really, it's been bothering me, so I just needed to say it. I was extremely stubborn, I shouldn't have kept on coming back, so I'm sorry for making you exasperated with me. I'm not usually like that, I guess I just..." Shrugging, his eyes made a quick, haphazard glance away from Jin. "...I had in my head that I was being optimistic about your response, but really, I was just being ignorant."

Jin was speechless as Namjoon finally brought himself to look him in the eye again.

"So...I'm really sorry, Seokjin. I hope you're not upset with me."

It was bizarre, the tone of voice in which this boy spoke to him. Jin had never heard such a genuine apology, such humility, and he wasn't going to lie, it was kinda touching. But at the same time, he felt guilty for some reason.

"You're...something else."

Namjoon smiled shyly.

"It's okay, really," Jin added. "I'm not upset with you. Honest. Wipe that...depressing look off your face..."

"My smile is depressing?"

Seokjin snorted. "Not what I meant."

Namjoon smiled again, a bit wider, dimples peeking through his cheeks. He was relieved, in one sense. But again, frustrated at the same time because of Jin's kindness. It wasn't going to make getting over him any easier.

"Sorry again," he added, "and thank you, ya know, for letting me get that off my chest. Like I said it's been bothering me for a while, so I just needed to express that." He bowed suddenly, and Seokjin flinched. "Thank y-"

"For goodness' sake, man, lift your head up! I'm not royalty!"

Puzzled, Namjoon did as he was told, tilted his head to one side as he straightened his back. "Uh, s-"

"If you say sorry to me one more time, I'm going to have a cow, Namjoon, I swear." He heaved a sigh that seemed to have come from the depths of his being and almost urged Namjoon to apologize again. "I don't mean that in a rude way, either, but honestly, man...you're making me feel bad."

"Well, that would be counterproductive, so I'll stop," the boy said in a somewhat forced cheery voice. "I'll leave you be, then, if you so desire."

"I so desire for you to talk less formally to me. We're the same age."

Namjoon's expression softened a bit as his dimples reappeared. "I don't think I've earned that right," he said, "but thank you. I'll, uh...see you later?"

This guy... "Yeah, I suppose so. You going to Minseo's party?"

"Who now? Oh-" He gave a nod. "Uh, well I didn't really think about it. But I might end up going 'cus I really have nothing better to do on a Friday night. I know for a fact Jimin won't even consider going but since I'm more of a party-person...yeah, I'll probably go."

"Cool, I might see you there, then."

It almost hurt to have Seokjin smile at him, though it was a subtle hurt. And he told himself, it was much better than having the boy ignore him. So he would take what he could get.

"Yup. See you there."

*

He hoped it would be beneficial for himself. Getting out of the house, doing something rather than staying cooped up in his room where he would probably just be playing video games or texting Jimin just to annoy him.

A part of him hoped he wouldn't see Seokjin at the party. Just a very minuscule part. Because obviously, seeing him wouldn't help Namjoon get the boy off his mind. At the same time, however, he really did enjoy talking to him...

"Conflicting, inflicting," he sighed—it was a phrase his father would often say. 'The contradictory things in life will only bring mental suffering. Know what you want, what you're looking for. Or the conflicting things will always inflict you.'

Namjoon shook his head as he pulled on his vans, then slipped into a light jacket. He checked the time on his phone—7:22 p.m. He was pretty sure the party technically started at 7:30, but people would just get there when they felt like it. So he left the house after letting his dad know he'd be borrowing the car.

He was at Minseo's house in roughly a half hour. At the door, Namjoon was welcomed by one of the guests, someone he didn't recognize, but who was surprisingly very polite in greeting him. Soon after, however, Namjoon encountered the group at every party who were somehow already drunk, and the ones who sat in corners and on furniture just playing on their phones.

Since Jimin wasn't here, as well as since this party was for Minseo, Namjoon went around asking where the party host might be, because the least he could do was wish her a happy birthday, even if he didn't know her well. Really, the only things he knew about Minseo were that she was beautiful, popular, and more than likely smitten with Jimin.

Honestly, he felt bad for her. After all, Namjoon knew now how it felt to be in love with someone whose sexuality wasn't compatible with your own. Except, of course, Minseo didn't know that.

According to several people, the charming young lady was outside, which also happened to be the source of the loud music he'd been hearing since arrival. Britney Spears. Not bad.

"Hey, Minseo."

He waved to the girl who lifted her head immediately at the sound of her name. And she smiled and waved back. "Namjoon, right?"

"Wow, you actually know who I am," he said jokingly. "I'm honored."

"Don't be," she joked back. "Glad you could make it."

"Happy birthday, by the way."

"Thank you, I appreciate it."

He waved one last time, then to her friends who were smiling at him. And maybe, if he were in the mood, he would have asked them for their names, or at least said something more. But instead, he silently made his way over to the table atop which was a spread of snacks that looked very inviting at the moment.

"Namjoon, so you made it after all."

From nearby a voice greeted him. His heart dropped just a little. That quickly the boy had forgotten Seokjin would be here.

He turned around, forcing a smile onto his face, just nearly blushing at the sight of Jin standing a few feet away, gorgeous as gorgeous could be without even trying. Nothing fancier than a button-down red shirt, a light jacket overtop, and a pair of black jeans. And yet still he made Namjoon's heart beat a little too fast.

"Yes, I did," he said in somewhat late reply. "As did you. Where's Hoseok?"

"Didn't wanna go." Jin pouted as his eyes rolled over in their sockets in minor annoyance.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Said his sister was visiting or something and he wanted to be home."

"Ah, I see."

"So is it cool if I just hang with you?"

He certainly wasn't expecting to hear those words. And he made that evident in his expression, which almost drove Seokjin to laugh at him.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"...you're okay with hanging out with me?"

"Why not?"

"Well-"

Namjoon stopped himself. He knew what he meant, but, not knowing how to articulate it, he figured it would be better to drop the subject. Luckily Jin caught on anyway.

"It's not like I want to avoid you because of all that," the boy said in a soft voice. "Don't look so down. I already told you I don't hate you. You don't honestly think I do, do you?"

"...no."

He was hesitant. That fact made Seokjin's chest hurt just a little, a subtle sinking. "C'mon, man..." Sighing, he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and pressed his thumb and index finger against his temples. "I wish you wouldn't think like that. Give yourself more credit, won't you? Sure, you may have been a little annoying before, but you're a very pleasant and easy person to talk to, you know."

Another shocking statement. Namjoon's eyes widened, brows pressing upwards against the middle of his forehead in innocent puzzlement. After a few seconds of staring, he glanced away, shy, as a slightly embarrassed smile slipped onto his face. "That's...very kind of you to say. Thank you, Seokjin."

"You're welcome."

To Jin, it was such an odd sight. Of course, he was starting to get used to it, but it was still so odd to seeing Namjoon behave this way. To see any boy behave this way, for that matter. But Namjoon, he had learned before, was outgoing to a considerable extent, but at the same time knew his limits and still managed to be considerate of other people. Now, at least around Jin, he was much more timid. But kind and polite and friendly all the same.

He had an approachable aura. An amiable personality. And Jin was still puzzled at how someone like Namjoon could ever fall in love with him.

"Thank you for talking with me."

"What?"

Namjoon's dimples showed themselves again, though even they were tentative as he. "For talking with me," he said again. "Really, it's a relief you're not uncomfortable around me. I'd hate for anyone to feel uncomfortable around me. And I mean, you have every right to be. So I guess I'm thankful for you being you." Pursing his lips, he looked away again. "Sorry, did I make it weird...?"

"No," Jin chuckled. "You're just a very...interesting guy, Namjoon. I'm sure Jimin loves having you as his best friend."

Now this made Namjoon laugh, but louder. "Oh, I don't think he'd say that."

"Nonsense. I really do think he appreciates you, Namjoon."

This comment earned Seokjin a genuine smile from the other boy. Small, but it held strong emotion thanks to the thoughtful warmth in his eyes. He paused for a long moment as his gaze fell to the ground. "Yeah," came a quiet whisper. "I know he does. Boy's got a rough life. Until Yoongi came along, I was all he had."

"What about his family?"

"No, they still don't even know," Namjoon said with a pitiful shake of his head. "He's been under so much weight for years now. And as much as I want to help him, there's only so much someone like me can do for him, ya know?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Seokjin slipped his hands into his pockets as he watched Namjoon's expression grow increasingly deeper in thought. "He seems hard on himself."

"Oh, he is. Very. Too much, I'd say." He let out a gentle breath. "That's why I'm real thankful for Yoongi. I can see he's made such a difference already in Jimin's life...and I'm happy about that. Really happy. Every step forward's a step in the right direction. Who knows, maybe I'll get to see Jimin smile again soon."

He wasn't sure why, but that sentence, more so the tone of voice in which it was spoken, made Seokjin's chest feel just a bit heavy. He could see it so plainly. The sincerity in this boy, how much he cared for his friend, and how frustrated he felt just because he couldn't do more than he was already doing.

"You're pretty selfless, aren't you?"

"Me?" Namjoon lifted his eyes and breathed a soft laugh in spite of himself. "Nah. I just care a lot about a lot."

"That's an admirable quality to have."

He knew it was dangerous to look at Jin for too long. Especially since Jin didn't seem to be afraid to maintain eye contact, and that was precisely what made Namjoon's heart waver the most right now.

He smiled, but that heart was crying just a little.

"Thank you, Jin. You're very kind."

"No, I'm honest."

"I'm not saying you're not, I'm just saying you're also kind."

"Well, thank you for saying that. But I'm really not kind at all."

"Not true. You proved your kindness by allowing me to come to your Christmas Eve party and serving me along with your other guests as though I was your friend, despite not knowing me well at the time."

"Common courtesy."

"That's kindness. Not everyone would have done that."

"Well, not everyone would publicly and repeatedly bow to someone of the same age and status as them, but you did that, you big ol' weirdo."

He didn't know why it was so funny to him, but it was, and urged an odd laugh to crawl up Namjoon's throat and meet the air as well as Jin's unsuspecting ears - and a contagious laugh it was apparently. Seokjin chuckled, then laughed a bit harder once Namjoon's moment of joy lasted longer than he thought it would.

"See, these are all the reasons I fell for you, Jin."

Heartfelt and apologetic at the same time.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said that-"

"It's okay."

Namjoon looked at him with saddened, diffident eyes.

"You're just being honest with yourself and with me. And I respect that about you."

"Oh." Ouch. "Can I say something else, then?"

"Go ahead."

"I think you look very handsome tonight, Jin."

It hurt them both, in different ways. For Jin, he didn't quite know why it hurt the way it did, other than the fact that Namjoon was special, and he realized he didn't like seeing the boy sad. So he sympathized for him. And perhaps felt just a little guilty still for breaking his heart.

"Hey, did you-.........hold on...is that Jimin?"

At the abrupt mentioning of the name, Namjoon furrowed his brow, gaze following the direction of Seokjin's eyes which led him to a spot near the house where two boys were standing. One, to Namjoon's disbelief, was without a doubt Jimin, with his unmistakable fiery orange hair and dark attire. But the other boy with him. It wasn't anyone Namjoon recognized. Or Jin, for that matter.

But it clicked before too long.

"Oh my gosh, that can't be Yoongi."

It was. And they both knew it was.

"He looks good."

"That's irrelevant, Namjoon, what on earth is he doing dressed like that?"

"That's also irrelevant, I think Jimin's crying."

Neither Jin nor Namjoon moved. Because in just a few seconds, Yoongi and Jimin both started to walk away, quite quickly, as though one or both of them wanted to get out of here as fast as possible.

Something had happened, that was for sure.

And Namjoon, for one, had a bad feeling.

"I'm gonna go after him."