[ cнapтer ғorтy-тwo ➛ ѕтarт ]

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"This is so fucked up, Alexa playing 'Walmart Gang' wouldn't do shit," Donghyuck hissed, ignoring the exasperated looks from older adults.

The program of Jisung's funeral had finished and the remainder of the invited guests were in the hall chatting or enjoying refreshments. Life had begun to feel real for the Dreamies, them no longer stuck in their thoughts and trances. Unfortunately, the funeral was nothing close to a properly somber occasion.

Jisung's parents had lived in a bar for the past days, Jace saying something to the Dreamies about them "realizing their fuck-ups" and "needing time to hate themselves for how dead-beat and shitty they'd been." Jace himself was broken down, which left the Zhongs to organize a procession that was more of an event for business than to honor a deceased.

Influential figures in business had shown up and made insincere speeches on how tragic it was that youth, the future of business and our generation, could be taken so out of the blue. A conclusion to the speech was a call to action for businesses to step it up, make that deal or partnership because you never know when your child might die of carbon monoxide.

It was disgusting.

The Dreamies had already attended Brandon's funeral, a much more respectful event that allowed for proper grieving and genuine speeches. But here, everything felt wrong.

Salami girl, in her black blouse and jeans, because she didn't want to wear an obnoxious dress like the other women at the event, was constantly sending glares at every adult. She clucked her tongue against the back of her teeth and moved to stand in front of the group. "No. This is absolute shit, and we're gonna have our own, unofficial program. Something to honor, not mock him, with none of this fancy formal bullshit. It'll be real, something Jisung would want. We organize it and only we're invited."

The group immediately livened up, and by the time they were leaving the funeral, they had a plan in place for later that afternoon. Bidding their parents goodbye, saying they wouldn't be home until the next day, they drove out in Chenle's blue convertible to that same beach from graduation.

It was Salami girl's first time there with the Dreamies, and she bit her lip when she observed their destination's landscape. She suddenly felt apprehensive and insecure, no longer bold and confident. Even after being close to the group for two months, she still felt like an outsider, someone who didn't deserve to attend, let alone organize, this private gathering for Jisung.

But there was no time for such thoughts as the Dreamies had work to do.

After stopping by the stores, they arrived back at the beach carrying blankets and flagpoles and fairy lights, even a few rockets, and fireworks. They headed over to a small fire pit, something they hadn't noticed before but was extremely convenient for them, and set up. Blankets arranged around the pit on the sand, flagpoles with fairy lights hanging from them set in place as a border.

Still only just evening, the sky colored bright blue as waves crashed onto the shore a good ways away from their set-up. Jeno had gotten a large, framed picture of Jisung they had taken on graduation day, which he stood up against one of the flagpoles.

And they sat or lay there in a circle, Jaeno and Markhyuck sharing blankets, while Renjun, Salami girl, and Chenle shared a third.

Swallowing down her nerves, the girl pulled out her laptop with a file saved of Jisung's bucket list. When they were younger, Chenle and Jisung created a bucket list together, and though they hadn't looked at it since, they completed quite a lot of what was on there.

She took a breath and began to read through Chensung's bucket list, the group sharing smiles and laughs or frowns and tears as she listed each of the many points typed. From small, stupid things like stealing liquor from cheap stores, to larger, big dreams like auditioning for a major agency, Jisung had done it all.

It took a while for her to get through the whole list, as after each item the Dreamies would immediately burst into chatter, taking few minutes at the least to calm down and allow the girl to proceed.

They'd share random thoughts and words like old times when they constantly acted like crackheads.

Or they spoke heartbreaking words of reminiscence, serious and somber thoughts about their beloved Jisung.

Day morphed to dusk and then night, the sky darkening considerably. The fairy lights and glow from the fire Mark started shone brighter and illuminated their faces and blanket-adorned bodies. Highlights and shadows on the picture of Jisung flickered as the fire's flames burned in irregular patterns, little sparks shooting up and out.

The waves crashed louder onto the shore, but from their distance was barely noticeable, a comforting background noise. The Dreamies didn't even notice the fine grains of sand on their clothes or blankets, too engrossed in Chensung's bucket list, spending a lot of time gazing at Jisung's picture.

Midnight was when Salami girl had arrived at the last two points. When reading through it in her mind, tears collected in her eyes and she unconsciously sniffed as her vision turned blurry, the black text swimming on the bright screen.

Renjun patted her back and pulled her close to him as she took deep breaths, face buried into the Chinese boy's neck. Chenle frowned and gently took the laptop from her. When he saw the words himself, he almost burst into tears.

"What does it say?" Donghyuck questioned as the rest of the group looked worryingly at the youngest.

Now that Jisung was gone, the youngest in their group was Chenle.

"It says--" Chenle interrupted himself with a loud sniff, then continued, voice shaking the slightest bit as he said, "He probably edited the document sometime after we created it and added these last two things... 'Number 68 for Jisung: be part of a group of friends worth dying for'--"

At this, the Dreamies simultaneously broke down, holding on to each other while tears streamed down their cheeks. It became harder to talk as they hiccuped or sobbed, faces twisted in heartbroken anguish.

"And n-number 69," Chenle was bawling, having to wipe furiously at his eyes with his fist. He wasn't even reading from the screen, seeing as how blurred his sight was when he finished, "'Confess to Chenle, make him m-mine, and make him the happiest a-angel alive because that's what he deserves'."

Cries grew louder.

Tears fell faster.

Hearts broke further.

It took a while for the Dreamies to recover from that last item.

But when they did, tear-stained cheeks wiped and clothes wrinkled from how tightly they hugged each other, they stood up and walked closer to the shore.

With rockets and fireworks in hand, they counted, "1, 2, 3!"

Booms and whizzes sounded, twinkling, crackling lights launched into the air, erupting with streams of color flashing in the dark sky, a haze left drifting behind.

This time, the group didn't cheer. They merely, with arms wrapped around each other's shoulders, watched as the brightness faded to an emptiness, faint smiles painted on their faces.

Jisung's permanent departure and everyone having to leave for universities or agencies were only the starts. They knew their own brightness would fade too, colors of youth gone, their track on to the next stage. Just like Jisung.

What mattered was they'd always have each other, always help and lift up one another, always have beautiful memories imprinted in their minds. Moving on from stages of life, from grief and pain was hard, but nothing could beat their friendship. By the time death would come for all of them, they'd be further separated, having to suffer through even more of a world of pain. Though, for now, no matter what, they'd continue to rise and burst of color just like the rockets and fireworks they'd released.

It would take a while for them to regain enough of that color.

But eventually, they will.

And they would continue to always go up.

Together.

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[ cнapтer ғorтy-тwo ➛ end ]

[a/n]: a chapter thirty 2.0?? fuck yeah

and yes this was heavily inspired by dance academy fucking quality ass show i 10/9 recommend it

! ! ! IMPORTANT READ THIS SHIT ! ! !

OKAY WHAT THE FUCK 100K+ I—

I LOVE YOU GUYS SO SO MUCH THERE ARE SO MANY MEMES OR OTHER THINGS I COULD PUT HERE AND SAY BUT THEY WOULDNT EVEN BEGINT O EXPRESS THE SMALLEST FRACTION OF HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU❤️❤️

you guys are gorgeous, you're beautiful, the fact that you're still reading this book and still voting and commenting or simply just reading makes my day❤️ i love reading through your cute comments, i love when i'm able to make you smile or laugh (and cry bc i'm actually satan). you all deserve all the good shit this world has to offer uwu💞

BUT NOW

! ! ! ALSO IMPORTANT PLS READ ! ! !

bc i got to 100K+ (how tf im still so fuckin shocked), i want to do smth special for all you cuties!!

you choose what you want me to do (anything but a face reveal) (i ain't bringing jisung back to life either loL), it could be a character q&a, or like,,,,,,, oThER tHiNgS idfk (better not require too many brain cells tho) (which means preferably not any story writing bc tHAT SHIT IS HARD and i'm a lazy bitch) (lol you're so welcome for giving you so much freedom in options)

comment here what you'd like —>

lol sike suggestions are closed now

❤️❤️❤️ilysm❤️❤️❤️