I accepted the date on the basis that I would witness him being inexcusably rude to the waiter, thus ending my trifling affections for him once and for all.

James Potter was rude to waiters.

Of that I was absolutely certain.

How could one person make my stomach clench, my heart flutter, and my nerves stand on end all at once? Just by sitting next to me, his warmth, his laugh, his gaze sent my heart palpitating and all of a sudden I'd be praying to Merlin that the darned organ didn't suddenly leap out of my throat altogether.

So you can understand, you can appreciate, why I am wholly convinced that he is rude to the poor service staff just trying to earn a living. One human should not be able to inflict such maladies on another. It is unnatural, unseemly and utterly obscene. And at long last I have found a cure to this affliction. Praise the heavens!

You may question my logic, you may say that poor Lily Evans has lost her marbles once and for all, but I shan't waver. I shan't!

James Potter is a rude, condescending, little swine who is not worthy of my feelings, let alone thoughts.

Take that Mr Heart Flutterer. What are you going to do with your stomach clenching now? Huh? HUH?

You know what? I am positively excited about this date. This date will prove once and for all that these bodily malfunctions I've been experiencing are utterly unfounded. There will be no more fanciful daydreams, no more embarrassingly longing gazes, and Alice will certainly not feel the need to point out that I mentioned him twice in two separate conversations within the space of thirty seconds.

Good riddance to you, James Potter! Good riddance, I say!

You can come at me with your dates. You can come at me with your twinkling eyes, your cheeky grin, and "alright Lily?"s, but I will remain unfazed! Unfazed and unimpressed!

Huzzah!

"Why do you look like you're preparing yourself for battle?" Alice's voice cut through my gleeful thoughts.

"Huh?" I replied, still lost in my idyllic dreams where the name James Potter meant nothing to me.

"Why do you look like you're psyching yourself up for a battle, or something?" Alice repeated with a somewhat retired look on her face, as if she'd almost rather not know.

"James Potter is a sod!" I announced proudly, puffing out my chest. "A worthless sod who badmouths waiters and treats them like the dirt underneath his stinky shoes."

"Really?" Alice asked, disbelievingly. "I was in the kitchens with him one time, and he seemed pretty friendly with the House Elves."

"A façade, my dear Alice!" I proclaimed loudly, with a dismissive wave of my arm. "Do try not to be fooled by his blatant lies."

"What's gotten into you?" Alice questioned, looking marginally worried. "What happened to the Lily who was prancing wildly around the dorm doing leaps and crumping violently after being asked on a date?"

"You swore never to mention that again." I hissed at her, pointing an accusing finger at her nose.

She swotted my hand away lazily, "Lily, you let out a rogue crump every time you get an O in Transfiguration, it was hardly unexpected that you would let it rip after the object of your affections finally asked you out."

"Momentary lapse in sanity." I retorted, sticking my nose in the air.

"So did he call it off or do something equally stupid then?" Alice redirected the conversation.

"Hah!" I let out a derisive laugh, "If I should be so lucky!"

"Okay..." Alice responded, dragging out the word as she struggled to come to grips with the unusual series of events. "Why the sudden change of heart then?"

"Change of heart? Oh no, my dear. No, no, no, no, no." I scoffed condescendingly, "I merely had a realisation, an epiphany, if you will."

"That James is rude to waiters?" Alice lifted an eyebrow, and I could practically see the disbelief dripping off it.

"Exactly." I replied smartly, glad that she was finally catching on.

"So you're not going to Hogsmeade with him this weekend then?" She asked probed.

"Not go?" I cried in outrage, "How could I not go and miss out on witnessing the irrevocable proof with my very own eyes!"

"Wait, you don't even have proof yet? Why do you think he's rude if you have no proof yet?" Alice asked incredulously.

"Proof? Pooh! I have all the proof I need in my mind, I merely mean that it will affirm what I already know to be true. And it will bring me great delight! Do you not wish me to be delighted? To be happy, Alice?" I looked imploringly up at her face, closed off with scepticism.

She sighed.

"What?" I asked, as her uncooperative responses finally chipped away enough of my elation for my voice to take on its clipped Head Girl-reprimanding-juvenile-student- tone.

"What do you want me to say, Lily?" Alice asked me wearily.

"Whatever you want to say." I replied immediately.

I waited for her to agree with me, for her to come to her senses and shower me with compliments at my brilliance. Her face morphed into one of delight, and I waited for the first "You're so right, Lily" to drop from her lips. I even would've settled for a simple "James is a prat", but no. Oh no. What words fell from those poisonous lips, then? You might ask. Well, I won't keep you in suspense any longer.

"James!" She exclaimed with great alacrity, "Fancy seeing you here!"

My body froze, my heart started pounding, and that all too familiar stomach clenching sensation returned. I whipped my head around in a frenzy, as my eyes darted frenetically around the room, searching for his hazel ones.

Meanwhile Alice crowed in the background.

I soon put an end to that.

"Ouch! Lily!" She whined, rubbing the back of her head.

"Serves you right." I replied haughtily, refusing to pander to her pitiful groans.

"Well, it was worth it to prove that you are in a complete state of denial." She retorted.

"What? I'm not in denial! That immature little prank proved nothing." I snorted, crossing my arms.

"C'mon, Lily!" Alice groaned in frustration, "The only one you're fooling is yourself! Wake up! Smell the roses!"

"I get hay fever." I replied, a little hurt that she didn't remember. Had I realised that incident in Herbology last spring was so forgettable I wouldn't have hidden in the dark Divination corner of the library for such a long time.

"Argh!" Alice flung her arms in frustration and a dull thunk sounded as her head made contact with the wooden table.

I didn't get a chance to see if she was okay, however, as a delighted laugh ripped through the Common Room. The Lily of yesterday would've described it also as ripping through her heart, but the older, much wiser, Lily of today could now laugh in pity at that poor, misguided little girl.

Instead, the Lily of today had the sudden urge to crawl under the table. Unfortunately before she could execute said plan, Alice's hand latched onto her forearm with an iron grip and without so much as even raising her sore head from the table. It was quite frightening actually.

"I guess it's time to see who's kidding who, hey?" Alice remarked, finally lifting her head ominously from the table.

"You mean now?" I asked in surprise, looking at my watch as panic swirled in the pit of my stomach, "You know, now's not really a good time for me, sorry. Can we reschedule? Sometime next week perhaps, when I've got a little less on my plate. So much assessment this week! Professors, right?" I rolled my eyes, subtly trying to force my arm out of her grip.

Alice simply responded my grabbing my other arm too. "Next week doesn't really work for me. You want to know why?"

I shook my head, my eyes darting from her face to her hands trapping my arms, and back to her face.

She continued anyway. "Because next week, it will be me comforting the distraught Lily who is in a constant state of mope, because some girl like Jean Riley is sprouting all this crap about how James Potter took her on the most amazing date, and how he was so charming, and how oh so delightful he was to the waiters."

"He wouldn't do that." I replied, albeit with a slight wobble in my voice. "Not next week anyway."

"Are you sure about that?" Alice probed, raising an eyebrow that meant business.

"Yes…"I replied immediately just to spite her. "Yes." I repeated more firmly a moment later. "Because the James I know now isn't the type of guy who would ask a different girl on a date every week. He's kind, fiercely loyal, and surprisingly thoughtful. He can be rash and a little insensitive sometimes, but at the end of the day, I know he wouldn't do anything to intentionally hurt me." I blurted out, suddenly feeling fired up. Something in my chest had burst and was now overflowing with warmth.

Alice was smiling at me with startling sincerity.

My skin began to prickle with a familiar sensation and my eyes widened. I whipped around to see James standing behind me with a shocked look on his face. His hair was sticking up in all directions and his eyes were bright.

"I can be rude to the waiters if you want me to, Lily." He said, resting his hands on the back of my chair.

I opened and shut my mouth a few too many times to feign nonchalance. "No.., uh, that's okay." I replied numbly, staring up at him gormlessly.

"Good, I could never be rude to Rosmerta." He responded with a mischievous grin.

That whipped me back into form, and I tilted my chin up at him so he would get the full effect of my brilliant retort, when he dropped a lingering kiss on my lips.

And then my stomach clenched and my heart began pounding persistently in my ribcage, but this time something was different. This time it felt right.

I relished in it.

Before I could fully appreciate the sensation of his warm lips, he was gone, sweeping his Quidditch gloves off the table and leaving without so much as a "Got training. See you Saturday." and one last smile that reduced my pathetic limbs to jelly.

The room shimmered in indissoluble light as he left the room and I revelled greedily for a moment more in the warm, silky feeling.

Alice generously allowed me this moment, before remarking with the long-suffering tone of a best friend. "You're going to crump now aren't you"

Disclaimer! Above work is not mine! I found it on fanfiction.net. Thanks for reading! See you on the next chapter!