Title: Threads of Eternity

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     "if you knew i'd be jealous in the first place then why would you choose to hang out with her, ha sooyoung?!"

     haejin hissed as she glared daggers at her girlfriend, the other girl ran her fingers through her hair in a stressed manner.

     it hadn't been a few hours since the dinner with their friends finished. ever since sooyoung had started hanging out with jiwoo throughout the whole meal, haejin had already been giving signs to her girlfriend that she should keep the interactions on limit however sooyoung failed to receive it.

     haejin didn't even understand how someone like jiwoo was able to be a part of the conversation that they all shared, she seemed to know almost everything about each person there and yet she chose to speak only when sooyoung was being too much of an attention hog.

     "that's so selfish, haejin! can't i go and hang out with my friends whom i haven't seen in years?"

     "jiwoo was your ex, sooyoung! how can I stop myself from thinking that you'll leave me for another woman after having a fun hangout?"

     sooyoung rolled her eyes at haejin who huffed out a puff of air. "haejin stop it, you're making it worse than it already is."

     haejin frowned but decided not to press further when sooyoung pulled her into a hug from behind.

     sooyoung sighed loudly, pinching the bridge of her nose. "i'm not going to leave you and i'm not even planning to." she whispered as she placed her head on the girl's shoulder.

     haejin, on the other hand, sobbed as she tried to wipe all her tears away. slowly unwrapping sooyoung's arms from her, softly pushing her away, "i think i'm gonna need some space."

     the girl muttered before running up the stairs leading to their shared bedroom before sooyoung could even protest. she sighed as she head to the living room.

     "i guess i'm sleeping on the couch for tonight."

——

     she threw herself onto her bed, her sobs echoing throughout the entire house.  her thoughts were racing a thousand miles per hour, images flashed by her eyelids which caused her to cry harder.

     "i'm such a jerk. i shouldn't have thought about those kinds of things." she mumbled to herself, hugging one of her pillows close to her chest. haejin wiped away the remaining tears from her face as she stared at her blank ceiling.

     "why couldn't i just see what's good between sooyoung and me?" the girl cried out loud while throwing herself around in her bed.

     "this is wrong. this is so wrong. i should just give up on her, let her live her life without me."

     "i don't deserve her and she doesn't deserve me."

     she continued muttering these sentences to herself until her breathing slowed down, she looked up at the clock on the bedside table and realized that it's really late.

     her heart felt heavy from disappointment and she got up reluctantly to change into something more appropriate. as she was looking for comfortable pajamas, a box behind the pile of clothes caught her attention.

     when was this here? she thought. her curiosity let her get the best of it as she took the mysterious box from the closet and placed it by the bed.

     the box wasn't small, it wasn't big either. just enough to fit a notebook inside. opening up the lid, haejin gasped in surprise.

    there were several pictures of both girls inside the box; one of them from a month ago when sooyoung bought haejin her favourite flower and the last one was from three years ago, it was of both of them on their first date. haejin stared at the pictures in awe, memories flooded back to her mind.

     she remembered how nervous she felt, wondering if sooyoung liked her back or not. she remembered walking with sooyoung home, talking about random topics while holding hands.

     she remembered the way sooyoung blushed whenever haejin laughed at something, she remembered telling sooyoung that she loved her.

     all these memories made haejin laugh. how did things come to this point? she thought as she stared back at the pictures.

     as she looked at more pictures of them, her attention was now diverted to those of pictures that were unfamiliar to her even though it was her and sooyoung in the photo.

     the photos looked like a mix between a couple's photo booth and an old black and white album. there were no words, just black and white pictures with the occasional colour thrown on the sides or a caption.

     one particular picture caught her eye, a picture where she was laughing and leaning against sooyoung on what seem like a ballroom dance.

     haejin was wearing a very elegant looking gown, like a princess would ever wear and sooyoung was in a suit, making her look like a perfect match for her and her only.

     out of all the pictures they took together, why was this the only one she doesn't remember?

     clearly, haejin never remember she ever danced on a ballroom or any event with this kind of theme with sooyoung. she kept looking at the two people on the picture, making sure if it was really her and sooyoung, which it is.

     haejin tried so hard to recall everything she has done with the girl in the past, but none with this memory. trying to ignore the thought, she flipped the photograph and it has some writings scribbled on it, barely readable.

     "and in the end, i'll seek you out amongst the stars." it read, a bunch of numbers were on the bottom right side of the paper which haejin assume was the year it was taken, 1879.

     looking at the two people once more, they both really looked like her and sooyoung.

     with the picture still in front of her, haejin began to feel a little weird. like she wasn't quite feeling right seeing that picture. it was odd and it didn't make sense to the girl.

     as haejin flipped through the photos, she couldn't shake off the strange feeling that lingered within her. each photo revealed a different era, a different time, but the faces in the pictures remained eerily familiar. it was as if she was looking at different versions of herself and sooyoung throughout history.

     there they were, captured in moments frozen in time, always together, always in love. the photos showed them as soldiers during a war, as artists in a bohemian café, as explorers in exotic lands, and as ordinary people leading simple lives. the settings changed, the clothes varied, but the love and connection between them seemed to transcend time.

     haejin's mind was filled with questions, confusion, and a sense of disbelief. how was it possible that she and sooyoung had been together in so many different lifetimes? was sooyoung really dating all those previous versions of her?

     a mix of emotions swirled within haejin—curiosity, fear, and a strange sense of belonging. she felt a deep connection to the person in the pictures, the person who looked like her but lived in different eras. it was as if they were all a part of her, different chapters in her own story.

     lost in her thoughts, haejin didn't notice sooyoung entering the room until she felt a gentle touch on her shoulder. startled, she turned to see the older girl's concerned expression.

     "i see you found the pictures," sooyoung said softly, her voice filled with a mix of nostalgia and anticipation.

     haejin looked at her, her eyes still filled with tears. "sooyoung, what is all this? why do all these people look like us? and why didn't you tell me about them?"

     sooyoung took a deep breath, her eyes searching haejin's face. "i should have told you earlier, but it's not an easy thing to explain. the truth is, haejin, I'm not like other people... i'm immortal, and i have lived many lifetimes. and in each of those lives, i've loved you."

     haejin's eyes widened, the realization sinking in. "you mean all these people in the pictures... they were all me? different versions of me?"

     sooyoung nodded, her expression filled with both sadness and hope. "yes, that's right. each of them was a different incarnation of you. and somehow, fate brought us together time and time again. i couldn't explain it before because I was afraid of how you would react, in this lifetime."

     haejin's mind was racing, trying to comprehend the magnitude of what sooyoung was telling her. it was a lot to take in, to accept. but amidst the confusion, a sense of love and destiny tugged at her heart.

     "so, you've loved all of me... in every lifetime?" haejin asked, her voice trembling.

     sooyoung reached out, cupping haejin's face in her hands. "yes, haejin. i've loved you in every way imaginable, across centuries and generations. and i love you now, more than ever."

     tears streamed down haejin's face, but this time they were tears of wonder and realization. the weight of jealousy and insecurity lifted, replaced by a profound understanding of the depth of their connection.

     sooyoung gently brushed away the remaining tears on haejin's cheeks, her touch filled with tenderness. "i'm so sorry, haejin. i never wanted to make you jealous or doubt my love for you. i should have been more considerate of your feelings."

     haejin looked into sooyoung's eyes, seeing the sincerity and regret in her gaze. "jiwoo was my ex, yes, but there's a reason behind it. when i discovered my immortality and the cycle of reincarnation that bound us together, i realized that finding you, my true love, in each lifetime was not an easy task...

     ....i wanted to make sure that i would recognize you when i see you again, thus saving these pictures," sooyoung took a deep breath, gathering her thoughts.

     haejin's brow furrowed in confusion. "recognize me? but we've already met, we were together."

     sooyoung nodded, a bittersweet smile playing on her lips. "yes, we have met and fallen in love in every lifetime, but our encounters weren't always so straightforward. sometimes, the circumstances kept us apart, and i needed a way to ensure that i would find you."

     haejin's curiosity grew, her mind trying to grasp the depth of sooyoung's actions. "and jiwoo? how does she fit into all of this?"

     sooyoung's expression turned solemn. "jiwoo was a part of a plan, a plan to bring us together once again. when i found out jiwoo was a friend of your friend, i thought that if i spent time with jiwoo, she might lead me to you, my true love."

     a mix of understanding and compassion washed over haejin. "so, jiwoo was never a threat to us. she was just a means to find me."

     sooyoung nodded, her eyes filled with gratitude for haejin's understanding. "yes, exactly. i'm sorry if my actions caused you pain. it was never my intention. i only wanted to ensure that i could find you."

     "plus when i finally found you, i decided to call things off with jiwoo but before i could, she did it first. she found her true love as well."

     haejin took a deep breath, feeling a sense of relief wash over her. the pieces of the puzzle were slowly coming together, and she saw the depth of sooyoung's love and commitment to their relationship.

     "i understand, sooyoung, and i'm sorry for being jealous. sorry for doubting you, i was out of the line."

     "it's fine, sweetheart. just so you know, i'd rather argue with you than laugh with anyone else," sooyoung clarified, kissing the back of the other girl's hands. "you know... i love you madly."

     haejin smiled. "yes, i know."

     "no one has ever loved me like you, or wanted to be with me. no one has ever accepted me for who i am. and now i have you."

     "and now i have you." haejin leaned forward and planted a quick kiss on her cheek, making her smile even wider.

     "what made you choose not to say all of this to me earlier?"

     sooyoung shrugged a shoulder. "maybe i was thinking you wouldn't believe me about this immortal kind of thing and take things the hard way."

     haejin shook her head. "no way. if that's all there is, it doesn't matter if i don't believe. there are things out there that will always exist no matter how much humans want them to go away."

     a light blush rose up haejin's cheeks as she stared at sooyoung's beautiful eyes. they were like honey.

     a deep honey color that had a soothing effect on the mind; it calmed her down enough so she didn't feel anxious anymore and it seemed to be an aphrodisiac for any human being. she loved them so much more than everything.

    "i love you," haejin watched as sooyoung looked down shyly, "i'll always love you".

     "even if we're not together forever, i'll still love you."

lifetimes ago, it's you.

it was still you.

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