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  𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍𝐄-𝐇𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐕𝐄;

𝙸 𝙵𝙴𝙴𝙻 𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴 𝙸 𝙼𝙸𝙶𝙷𝚃 𝙹𝚄𝚂𝚃 𝚂𝙸𝙽𝙺 𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙳𝚁𝙾𝚆𝙽 𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙳𝙸𝙴~

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𝐌𝐘 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 has been just like retarding acceleration ever since holidays started. Well I of course aced my exams as usual no problem with that. But ever since I took the Hogwarts express home my life is at all times low.

Right after I step into my house and take a long 12 hour nap I wake up with a freaking 40 degree celsius fever. The best part is that my grandma was out of town with my grandpa for some conference in the United States and my mom was leaving that afternoon for a one week research in China.

So I'll be stuck with the laziest and most careless, useless and maturity lacking people in my whole family and that is, Lorcan and my dad. My dad doesn't give a shit about literally dying and melting all he cares about is me not spreading this terrible viral fever to him. So I'm basically in quarantine.

Lorcan on the other hand was in charge of poisoning me with his home cooked nutritional food which is half burnt. My dad and he were enjoying their life eating takeout and I was eating half-cooked or over-cooked poison made by Lorcan.

I took my pills and eventually the fever did come down by day 3 but I was still coughing like a tuberculosis patient. The day my grandma came back was the day I had officially revived from my half dead state.

Since I was dying in bedrest for a week and as a result, all my spy training and exercises went down the hill, my motivation for walking to the gym was negated. I ALSO HAVE FACIAL HAIR GROWING ON ME LIKE, ERGH. Now I gotta shave, my voice is deep and well developed though, I no longer have weird voice cracks and a hoarse voice.

I'm glad to say that I'm officially 6 feet tall now, I wish to just stop growing cause I don't want to be more tall or I might turn out to look lanky but I've pretty good muscles so maybe two more inches will do so I look like a masterpiece.

By the second week I tried bringing myself back to routine and I guess it did work a bit. I went to the gym, I worked part-time in a juice shop for some minimum wage and got my 8 hours screen time back on track.

My life now was just constant acceleration. Just going and going and going... I don't know where to. That was until...

I found myself falling, I was falling off a mountain or something for like around 10 minutes with my stomach flipping. My hair gushing on my face and the beautiful dark night sky sprinkled with stars. I was in a state of a freely falling body.

Then I hit the water with a splash. It was dark blue and my vision underwater was blurry with water. The refraction of the starlight on the water surface gleaming. I was just drowning, suffocating.

For some reason I couldn't swim back up. Some darkness just seemed to be pulling me into the depths of the ocean. I was losing my breath, I was feeling dizzy and lightheaded and then-

A blurry figure appeared in front of me, it was a girl with long hair, she was gentle and pretty. I couldn't see her but I could sense her femininity as she swam towards me and held my hand. Then a sense of fullness came over me, I think it was affection. She came close to me and our nose slid against each other. She placed her lips on mine.

I woke up to realise it was just a dream, I must say it was more of a nightmare for a philophobic person like me. I must say this traumatising dream has been making me overthink a lot. Because for some reason I keep relating this dream with Lily and me kissing on Christmas eve.

The worst part is this girl in my dream, I don't know who she is but something tells me that it's Lily and I- I don't know why but I feel anxious about this whole situation. To be honest I've been trying to bury all my thoughts about her and Keres ever since the holidays began.

I don't know why but I'm really confused about my feelings for her and the awkward relationship status of both of us. I feel like I might accidentally be in LOVE with her but NAHHH...

Today was around the third week of July and things were constant as usual, nothing special. I woke up at 11:00 am and drank some tea without brushing my teeth. I was still in a half awakened state awkwardly sitting on the couch and sipping on my tea slowly. When two owls arrived with letters.

It was definitely on the booklist for 5th year. I took the letter from the owls and called Lorcan, "BRO! The booklist came" I announced as Lorcan came into the scene with pyjamas. "Ehh" he let out a groan and snatched the letter from my hands and opened the one addressed to him and he gave a glance. "We should try to meet the guys in Diagon Alley this time" he said, scanning through the items.

"Hmm" I said as I opened the flap of mine and I put my hand in for the letter but something metallic and cold came in contact with my fingertips. I took a piece of metal out and I gave a good stare at it. NO WAY.

"NO WAY! NO FUC- FREAKING WAY!" Lorcan screamed looking at the perfect badge I was holding. "LORCAN! LANGUAGE!" My grandma screams from her room. "GRANDMA WE HAVE A PREFECT IN OUR FAMILY!" Lorcan screamed.

I was in utter shock and disgust. ME? PREFECT? I was in such a hopeless condition I didn't know whether I should be crying on how I'll be managing humans with negative IQ with my social skills or whether I should be laughing at this badge hysterically.

I can no longer sleep until 8:00 am and run to class. I have to be at prefect duty by 7:00am so I have to wake up at least at 6:30am and if I don't Jared would torture me mentally. Why isn't Jared the prefect? Why me? I'm not even that responsible and people take me for granted. I don't even think half of the population of Hogwarts knows a guy named 'Lysander' exists.

"We should celebrate" my grandma said suddenly appearing in front of me as I didn't notice her as I was zoned out in my thoughts. "Lily is definitely the other prefect" Lorcan announced and he dashed into my shoulder sideways and whispered into my ears in such a way that it wasn't audible to my grandma, "Now you can spend more alone time with your Lilyyy" he said in a sing songy voice as I pinched his arm in frustration.

It's bad enough I'm a prefect but now that I'll probably be dealing with Potter too makes this hundred times worse.

This terrifying news of me being a prefect was good enough to make my memories of that dream blurry as now I was thinking about my ill fate. That whole day was rued by this news. I remained silent the whole day. The only productive thing I did was give my Husky some belly rubs, play with my owl Hermes and pat Lorcan's cat between the ears for over an hour.

I eventually slept filled with teary eyes as I was listening to 'Champagne Problems' by Taylor Swift. I can assure you the next day didn't get any better.

I was woken up at 8:00 am, by the announcement of my mom that Lily would be arriving by 2:00pm. FUCK MY LIFE.

I got up from my bed and lazily went into the bathroom and took my brush, washed it and put on some toothpaste and started scrubbing my teeth as I walked around my house. "Lysander! Would you stop walking around the house while brushing! Your saliva will splash everywhere" my mom screamed at me. I ran to the sink quickly before my mouth overloaded with foam and spit the paste out and I screamed back at her, "MY SALIVA IS NOT GOLD SO, YOU DON'T NEED TO WORRY ABOUT WASTING IT!"

"Can you stop back-answering your mom all the time, learn to listen and respect elders" my dad said adjusting his glasses as he glanced at the newspaper. I just ignored his statement and started brushing again.

My dental health is literal shit. The only person I'm scared of in the world is my dentist because every time I show up at his clinic without flossing he tells me not to visit him and yet I do, JUST TO GET SCOLDED BY HIM EVERY SINGLE VISIT.

I lazily sat on the couch next to Lorcan's cat who was sleeping, Sugars. For some reason I feel that Sugars loves me more than Lorcan cause I have this weird problem of walking around my house just thinking about stuff and I randomly jump like a mad idiot to touch the beam of the room and Sugars just keeps following me.

Sometimes when I take a long bath Sugars just waits for me outside the bathroom door on the rug until I come out and during mornings I find Sugars sleeping on the stairs of my bunk bed. I must say though since Sugars is an orange cat she has a personality of her own. The amount of times she has slipped on nothing is uncountable.

I watched 'Wednesday' again until like 1:00pm. But then I got the realisation of Lily's arrival so I turned off the TV and picked out a t-shirt and went inside the bathroom and undressed myself for a bath.

I was in my deep thoughts of being a 'responsibility of a prefect' as I took a warm shower. I'm usually not a fan of taking showers during the holidays. I sometimes go as long as three days without bathing but when I take a nice shower on a day I feel like it, I'll bathe for at least an hour with all the water flowing through every single skin pore on my body.

Today was a relaxing chill bath day. I was just chilling standing in the shower feeling every drop of water on my skin when I heard someone open the bathroom door. OH SHIT, DID I NOT LOCK THE DOOR.

I saw Lorcan walk in and he immediately ran out as he saw me naked in the shower. THAT LITTLE BITCH! I quickly dried myself and jumped into my clothes as I walked out of the bathroom like a mad strucken devil.

I glared at Lorcan and he casually said giggling, "Bro, how'd you have such good muscles when you don't even do sports?"

THAT'S IT! HE'S DYING TODAY. I charged towards him as he ran out of the room banging the door. I chased after him and he ran outside the house into the garden. Eventually after running around for over 6 minutes he got exhausted and slowed down. I caught him and started choking him. "WHY'D DID YOU SEE ME NAKED?" I screamed.

"GAHHAHS" he muffled and I let go of his throat as he gave a cough. "WHY DIDN'T YOU LOCK THE DOOR?" He asked coughing. "I NEVER LOCK THE BATHROOM DOOR" I replied. Yeah, that was actually a fact I don't think I ever locked the bathroom door when I was in my house.

"HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW YOU WERE IN?" He screamed at me. "WATER SPLASHING SOUNDS" I screamed back. "Whatever, but my fault is equal to your fault for not locking the door" he said, crossing his arms.

"BUT STILL-" I said, raising my voice. "Consider yourself lucky that it was me and not Lily" Lorcan said giggling. URGHHHH MY URGE TO MUDER HIM RIGHT NOW, I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW I'M CONTROLLING MYSELF FROM SMASHING HIS SKULL.

"Why'd you wanna die so badly?" I asked him, giving him my signature evil smirk. "Why'd you keep lying that you don't like Lily when you're hitting on her so hard?" He asked, raising his eyebrow.

"I-" I started. No, I can't waste my time explaining things to fools. I went to tackle him and carried him, "WOAH! YO! HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU CARRYING ME?" Lorcan exclaimed as I carried him to the edge of the cliff, "I could throw you off and end my problems" I told him.

"Or maybe I'll mind my own business " he said as he gave a smile of fear. "Will you?" I asked him. "Yes, now put me down I'm your brother not your wife" Lorcan said as I dropped him on the floor. "Oops" I let out a sarcastic gasp.

"Hey" said a female voice behind us. I turned back to see Lily, her awkward suzy smile and a giggle as her hair was flying east because of the winds. She kept adjusting her hair and tucking her bangs behind her ear. "Hey Lils! I was just going to get murdered but it's fine now, I handled the situation" Lorcan said as he got up groaning with an awkward smile.

"I wish I had a sister to have fun like you both, I'm envious of both of your relationships" she said smiling. 'In the sweetest smile lies the darkest secrets' my mind was saying on repeat. "Are you ok?" I blurted out. OH NO, LYSANDER NEVER ASKS ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE'S WELL BEING. MY AM I NOT BEING MYSELF.

"Kind of- just been bored and I don't know why but I seem to lack an interest in everything these days and it's quite lonely" she replied. "You should let our mom know of your arrival" Lorcan said, adjusting his hair. "Yeah I was getting to that, I'll be back after I leave my things, WAIT FOR ME!" Lily said as she ran towards my house.

"She's changed '' I said randomly. "No, you've changed. I'll be honest I used to make fun of you before but Ly, I'm serious bro, the way you look at her is not 'just friends' or 'just siblings'. I think you like her" Lorcan said. "Nonsense" I said as I chuckled and continued, "I was talking about Keres's influence on her '' I said.

"Stop shutting yourself out" Lorcan said. "I'm not ok? I don't like her. I mean I do but just as a sister nothing more. I just don't like her and Keres" I said, rolling my eyes. "Keres is actually pretty cool. I was talking to him one day after exams" Lorcan said.

"You have a lame taste in guys and girls I guess, maybe that's why you don't like me" I said as I walked back to my home.

On the way I bumped into Lily. "I'm going to the beach, you wanna join?" She asked. She had changed her attire from a blouse and a skirt to an orange floral beach dress. "Uh, sure I have to change though and I'll come with some drink too you just go to the beach with Lorcan I'll be back" I said as I walked away from her and entered my house.

I don't know why but every time I look at her or talk to her or each time our eyes meet but heartbeat rises and my palms get all sweaty and I end up saying something in such an awkward manner sometimes. The worst part is that some people call these symptoms, 'crush itis' but I don't have a crush on her, probably.

I changed into a white shirt with palm trees on them and grabbed a icebox and threw in some sprite bottles and coke bottles that were left in the refrigerator since that week I spent with Lorcan and my dad and I took a portkey made by my grandma to the beach, I was lazy to walk.

I saw Lorcan and Lily standing together and talking about something as the ocean waves washed their sinful feet. I spread out the picnic mat and placed the icebox over it so that it doesn't fly away and I went and stood next to Lorcan awkwardly.

"It's beautiful here" Lily said, looking at the horizon of the vast ocean. Her eyes shimmering in the sunlight. Her hair is waving in melody with the wind. She isn't beautiful, she's not pretty, she's a bewitching and enchanting goddess who walked straight out of Olympus.

She isn't that little girl who I thought she was anymore. She's a graceful, heartbreaking lady now. I hate puberty. I hate having all these meaningless attractions.

Lily bent down and touched the cold ocean water. Then she walked around and then she was standing behind me. Oh gosh my heart! I look like a weirdo suffering from palpitations. I was just standing as still as a statue as she observed me. Then I felt a force and the next second I found myself on the shore of the ocean with my face on the wet sand and my hair getting washed by the waves.

THAT BAKA!

I got up and I stared at Lily who had already ran a few metres away to escape from my warth. I ran back after her for revenge. She ran across the lengths of the beach as I ran behind her followed by Lorcan running after me confused on why me and Lily were running.

I slowly increased my speed progressively and caught up with Lily and held her by hugging her backwards. "YOU LITTLE BITCH!" I said, struggling to keep her within my arms.

"HEHEHEHE" Lily gave an evil laugh. I picked her tiny doll body up and went into the depth of the ocean around my knee level and dropped her in as I ran back. The ocean here was like backwaters so there weren't any currents and anything dangerous like high and rough waves.

"YOU!" Lily said, rising from the water like a sea monster and running to catch me. She bent down and grabbed some sand and threw it on me but it missed and hit Lorcan instead. I started laughing like a maniac and Lorcan growled at me and grabbed some sand and threw it at me. "BRO, SHE DID IT! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WHY ARE YOU ATTACKING??" I screamed. "ATTACK LYSANDER!!!" Lily announced.

The battle had started and we were having a sand war. I tried stopping them by explaining to them how immature this was for a 15 year old but I just got some extra sand balls on my face as a result. At the end of the whole battle we all ended up looking like the sandman from spiderman no way home.

15 minutes of war and we still haven't come to a peace treaty. All of us were standing on the beach shore in the water. "Ok! I call out for a truce!" I screamed as one of Lorcan's sand balls hit me. "WEAK!" Lily screamed, grinning like a devil. "No, I just want to stop this childish fight" I said as I dropped the sand in my hand and walked towards them unarmed.

"A truce it is" Lily said as she came forward to shake hands. "DON'T BELIEVE THAT TRAITOR!" Lorcan screamed but it was too late. I locked her in my arms and splashed water on her. "TRAITOR YOU LYING PIECE OF SHIT!" Lily screamed out struggling in my presence. "All is fair in war babes" I said laughing.

Eventually we all gained maturity and stopped this childish fight and sat on the shore of beach Listening to the sounds of waves crashing. "Remember when we used to play here all day and then our moms used to force us to take baths together" Lorcan said, sipping on some coke. While Lily was picking out sand globules from her hair.

"I know right, it used to be times" Lily said, sighing. My awfully wonderful memory started playing the scene and I couldn't help but giggle. "OI! YOU REMEMBER THAT WELL?" Lily asked, looking at my reaction. "SORRY I HAVE TERRIBLY BLESSED MEMORY" I screamed giggling. "CREEP! GET THAT SCENE OUTTA YOUR HEAD" Lily said abusively beating me up as she knocked my head by placing my head on her lap.

OH SHIT BUTTERFLIES. My stomach was flipping as she ran her long nails through my hair. "I'm really unlucky" she said randomly looking at me with her eyes. HER EYES, MY HEART I WAS GETTING MURDERED BY A THOUSAND CUTS.

I got up from her lap immediately in a rushed manner. "Why are you unlucky again?" Lorcan asked third wheeling the whole situation. "I don't know" Lily said, zoned out in her thoughts.

"You're the prefect and Ly's the prefect you both should really stop fighting and cooperate" Lorcan said. "HE STARTS IT, HE'S THE PROBLEM" Lily said pointing at me. "Keep dreaming, drama queen. I mean drama peasant, you don't have such a high status to be a queen to me" I said snickering.

"Please stop" Lorcan said, exhausted.

We had more heartfelt conversations about our childhood and I could only notice how different she was. Her laugh, her smile, her grace even though most of it was fake, that was the beauty that should be praised. The one enhancing the greyness on one.

I feel like I just might sink and drown and die in her vast emerald sea green eyes. Then the dream that had me tormenting me cleared up. Now I was falling during dusk during sunset, how scenic the sky is golden and I'm sinking in emerald water and that girl, it was Lily. The one who saved me from drowning. Her worried face and a little happiness as her red hair was all over me as she placed a kiss.

I don't love her. My mind is just playing tricks with me. I don't have to worry much about this. It's a common symptom of adolescence called, 'attraction' and that's due to maturity. I'll get over this eventually.

I don't have time to waste on a girl who's already committed.

But deep inside me a voice keeps asking me. Are you just pushing her away just because you're afraid that you're falling in love with her?

XX~𝐿𝓎𝓈𝒶𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇~XX