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•SALOME ALAN•

Evening rides is usually the best of the best. The sun is down and the weather is a tad chilly which makes the trip mesmerizing. I sigh softly, my eyes on the tinted glass as Aunt Jenny drives to the mall which is across the road, right in front Garden estate gate. The estate is a bit boisterous with vehicles since most people are driving back from work.

Jenny slows down when we get to the entrance as she wait for them to pull the gigantic gate open.

"Aunt Jenny," I turn to face and she hums in response, now driving out of the gate and into the main lane. "Can I ask something?"

"Yep! Shoot."

I cross my leg on the other, fooling with the lace of my sneakers, "Would it be nice to like...take extra classes?"

Jenny scrunch her brows in thought as she adjust in her seat. "For your coming external exams or..."

"On literature," I quickly add then press my lips. I've been thinking about it since I got back from school and since my aunty is less busy and has my time today, she can give me some advice. Even though I kind of have this feeling that she'd say yes.

"Literature? Yes, yes, that would be nice." She drives into the park arena of the mall, looking for an empty space. "You haven't still told me why you despise the subject though." She throw me a look and face the steering in a jiff.

I take a deep breath, taking in the nice fragrance of the air conditioner. "I think if I start extra tutorials on it, I'll get interested. By the way, it was suggested by my principal."

Jenny nods slowly then revise to park properly into the only free space she found. "What a caring principal you've got, Salome."

A small smile form on my lips as I digest what she just said. My principal is just been caring for her students and I'm sure I'm not the only one she has spoken like she did to me. "Yeah..." I mutter.

She kills the engine and sigh, picking up her purse and I detach the seat beat before opening the door, the fresh natural evening breeze hitting me afterwards.

"Let's go." Aunt Jenny press the tiny remote lock and walk to where I am standing. I pull the thin strap of my bag up my shoulder as we walk Into the glassy doors of the mall.

We stroll through the glass doors and walk directly to the foodstuff area. I grab a trolley from the side and meet Aunt Jenny who's already picking a few things. She drops the fresh bunch of spinach and cabbage inside the trolley and I glance around the mall, humming to the low music slipping from only Gods know where.

"Carrots, check. Ginger, check," Jenny says as she look through the little note in her hands then look up at me, "I think we're done here, let's pay and go get some clothes."

I nod, smiling as I push the trolley toward the cashier who is beaming with joy as we approach.

She quickly calculate all the items and hand the polythene to me, follow by a small receipt. Without looking at it, I stuff it in the back of my shorts and turn to meet Aunt Jenny who's already walking ahead. How mummy full.

"How about this?" Jenny waves what looks like a little skimpy skirt to me and I giggle, shaking my head.

"You know I don't wear skirts." I say and turn my face back to the batch of jeans and biker shorts which I find attractive.

Jenny rolls her eyes, hanging the red small skirt back where she pulled it from, "You really need to doll up, Salome. Look at you...all big and woah, look at that backside."

I couldn't stop the laughter this time. Is my aunty teaching me to start dressing like a mature lady when I'm only eighteen?

"I'm good with my jeans, aunt Jenny." I confirm between laughter, she's always like this when we go out.

She shrugs, picking a top from the hanger. "Your choice babe, you're yet to know."

"Yeah yeah."

I walk down to the side filled with socks of all kinds and I careful take the only type I wear and drop in the shopping basket in my hand. I massage my temple, thinking of what else I'd need since I didn't write a list.

"Salome."

I turn to my name, my lips cracking up in laughter when I see my aunty holding my socks with her middle finger like it's shit.

"What is it?" She asks, looking at it with all concentration and I cover my mouth to stop myself from laughing.

"It's socks!" I answer, trying to stop snickering

She raise a brow, "Don't tell me this is that thing you wear that goes up to your waist, that thing that babies and ballerinas wear," She drops it back to where the others are on the long shelf and I grab in immediately and stuff in the basket again.

"Oh my, no..." I drawl and she folds her arms, peering at me to expatiate, "It's called pantyhose."

"Panty what?" She shake her hand as she chuckles, "Don't tell me you wear this under your uniform skirt." I purse my lips and that's enough conformation that she is saying the truth. "Seriously?"

I can only nod, wondering what's wrong with me wearing a pantyhose instead of an actual socks.

"Is it bad?" I ask in a low voice and Jenny shrugs again, probably respecting my choice.

"I..I mean, it's your choice so..."

"It just helps covering my fat legs, that's why." I mutter but my aunty heard anyway, her facial expression screaming 'why'.

She glance at my legs which are exposed because I'm putting on a pair of short jean which is above my knees. I shuffle my feet, already feeling insecure with how she's looking at them.

"I don't see anything bad in having thick legs, Salome," Jenny says, still looking at them, "I mean...it's sexy."

Sexy? Oh please.

I frown in disapproval, walking away to grab some pens. "It's not, that's why I wear it to cover how big my legs are." I turn to her and see that she's already behind me. "And it keeps getting bigger."

"Shows you're not confident with your body, and that's bad."

I lift my shoulders in a shrug, secretly don't want to talk about it anymore.

"Hey, come here," Aunt Jenny gently take my hand to the front of the changing room, in front of a mirror.

I stare at the girl in the mirror, the girl with her hair pleated all back and then down to her legs... Thick fat legs. My thick fat legs.

Jenny stands at my back, looking at me through the mirror and smiling. "You're beautiful. Your hands. your face. your legs, everything about you is well fixed if only you try and see you that way."

I tilt my head, not saying a word.

Jenny place her hands on her waist, "Do you know how many girls would kill to have your body right now?"

I turn to her in a flash and she winks, making me realise that two girls at the corner are staring at me through the rolls of clothes displayed. One flash a small smile, and the other just stare at me in awe.

Bunch of weirdos.

"Talking about the obvious." My aunt sings and I drift my face back to her, "They're admiring you baby girl."

I puff out air, adjusting the thin falling strap of my bag. "They can have it if they want, I would kill to have model like legs," I mutter.

Aunt jenny chuckles, shaking her head. I bet she heard me.

"Can't wait for you to figure out how gifted you are."

I poke my tongue in my mouth, glancing around the glamorous mall arena. The mall is also crowdy today like it's weekend when it's just a casual Wednesday evening.

My eyes lands on a familiar figure and I turn front with wide eyes. My aunty raise her brows, arms folded as she look at me to tell her why I reacted that way. I shake my head, pleading with my eyes for her to just forget it. Instead, she peeps above my head to see what made me act that way.

"Woah...how handsome..."

And she saw it. Him. My teacher who I rapidly looked away from so he wouldn't see me. And why is she still staring at him?

It's so embarrassing.

"Who's he?" Jenny asks, her eyes swallowing my literature teacher. I press my lips together, my heart beating fast for a reason I don't know. If I speak, he might hear my voice and figure it's me but I know my aunty, she won't let it slide. I open my mouth to speak but aunty Jenny is already going to meet him.

Dear ground, pls open and swallow me up.

I take few steps forward, skillfully hiding myself behind the shelf of clothes so I won't be seen. Just pray Jenny won't utter my name. How did she even see - no- why did she go?

Chewing the inside of my mouth, I place my ears closer since they are in the other side. I can hear aunt Jenny giggling and my curiosity shoots. What is she even saying? I run my palms on my face, I shouldn't have agreed to follow her in first place.

"Oh...yes, nice to meet you."

"Yeah, you too."

I hear footsteps, making me glue my back to the shelf only for the unstable fancy shelf to fall, taking it with me.

Eyes. That's what I saw the moment I open my eyes, people are staring at me with shock spiced with pity and I shut my eyes in the sweet embarrassment.

"Oh my God, are you alright?" Jenny asks, lifting my up with the shopping assistant taking up the fancy broken shelf. I fell right in front of up to twenty people who are still whispering 'sorry' to me. I just nod, I want to leave this place.

My aunty squats to pick the items we bought which scattered on the tiled floor and I fight back the tears pleading to fall. From the corner of my eyes, I can see the person I was hiding from, looking at me, making me more embarrassed. More petite.

Jenny stands and I walk away out of the mall, my aunty following behind.

Without looking up, I stand in front of the car, waiting for her to pay for the items and meet me.

"Hey..." Jenny strolls out and press the button to unlock the car and I pull the door open and slide in, slamming it close after. There's is no way I can reverse what just happened inside and the fact that I'll see him tomorrow after falling face down makes me unwilling to go to school the next day.

She enters the car and I finally take my head up, looking at the tinted glass, at least no one would see me now.

"Salome, look at me," My aunt's voice prompts me to look at her, noticing how worried she looks.

I sigh, smiling stiffly. "I'm okay..."

She push the key into the hole and the vehicle let out a starting sound, "You are not, sorry for what happened."

I nod slowly, biting my lips. "Thanks..."

"Why were you hiding from your handsome teacher by the way?" She glance at me before reversing to drive out. I saw this question coming.

"Because I didn't want to see him," I mutter as I click in the seat beat.

Jenny frowns as she maneuver her way out of the parking lot. "Why?"

"Because he's Mr Alex. My literature teacher," I say dryly and Jenny's mouth form an 'o'. She look at me again, her eyes glistening with amusement and excitement.

"You didn't tell me your literature teacher is that hot..."

I roll my eyes, drumming my fingers on my exposed thighs. "Hot my foot." I say to myself

"Pardon?"

I shake my head, praying she won't talk about him throughout the remaining of today. "What did you tell him?" I have to ask so I'll know the length of my embarrassment.

Jenny's smile widens and I shake my head. Mr Alex was only putting on a plain white shirt and blue joggers from the little I saw and my aunty is already drooling.

Congrats Mr Handsome.

She shrugs, her eyes in the windscreen. "I just told him how breathtaking he is, any problem with that?"

"Yes!" I slap my hands on my laps and Jenny giggles. She is a bold and confident lady who can say anything to anyone. "I mean...you can't just walk up to someone and tell them things like that."

"I don't see anything bad in that, Salome. Anyway, it's a yes from me, attend that extra lessons your principal persuaded you too, don't waste the opportunity of seeing that hot soul."

I raise a brow, propping my chin on my knuckle. "Cause he's handsome? Nah...I'll rather ask Mrs Wright to tutor me, I'll just have to tolerate her weird demonstrations."

Jenny throw her head back in laughter, not too long before she face front again. "You are so...funny, I wish I were you Salome, I would take the offer without thinking twice."

I twirl my mouth upwards at her words, why is it that no one is seeing it from my side? That Mr Alex is just...normal. Harsh. Blunt.

Aunt Jenny drives into the Garden estate gate, flashing the gateman a small smile.

"Why not let him tutor you first, then you'll know if it's your sexy teacher you hate or the subject itself." Jenny says as she drive into fourth avenue.

I glance at the cars passing by the road of the estate and eyes pop out at the striking idea that came to my head.

"Aunt Jenny." I call, grinning and she look at me then back to the steering.

"Yes."

"If I let Mr Alex tutor me, would you pay me for it?" I ask, wiggling my brows.

The car stops abruptly and I smile, that question is enough to make Jenny step on the brake in a jiff.

She turn to me, her hands still on the steering. "What did you just say?"

I pout my lips and she blink her eyes, smiling. I don't know where the idea came from either but at least, it's more like working so I should get paid, right? Then I won't mind getting belittled by my teacher. I won't even mind him talking to me rudely.

"I..how did you even..." My aunt trails off, finally moving the car. I exhale sharply, standing my ground.

"Yep! Anyhow you pay. Daily, weekly, or even monthly". I gesticulate with my fingers, watching how my aunty tries her best to stop smiling.

"Salome."

"Yep!" I answer almost immediately, still excited with my awesome idea.

"Who taught you this?" She asks, laughing softly. I don't know if she wants me to answer that since she already know the answer.

I hum in thought with a smirk on my face. "My aunty."

Jenny nods slowly as she parks close to our house. "Yeah...tell your aunty she taught you a bit, too much." She pull out the key and I laugh loudly, grabbing the shopping bags from the seat at the back.

"I will... " I sing as I slam the door lock and wait for her to lock the vehicle before we go in.

***

I bounce on my fluffy bed, stretching afterwards to how stressed out I am. It wasn't really easy for aunt Jenny to finally agree with what I said. I never knew facial looks can be such a huge weakness on her. I giggle at what the last words she said.

"Promise to take sneak pictures of him too."

My Dad won't be home till next tomorrow so it's only me and Jenny at home. I sigh softly, staring at the ceiling of my room when the ding sound of my phone draw my attention to it. I adjust to rest my back on the headboard, cringing my legs happily before swiping my phone to unlock.

The first pop up message came from Zara and I waste no time tapping it open.

Zara: Hey boo! Guess what I saw...😯

I shake my head, chuckling. What on earth did Zara see this time? I glance up to see that she's online and quickly type something.

Me: What did you see? Just tell me and stop been dramatic.😌

I send the message and open other messages from my classmates to reply. I only have few of my classmates I interact with because most of them have this, serious personality that irritates me to the core. This overly focused character like they're science student. Even science students are not as serious as them.

The phone dings again and I tap the message notification, fully aware it's from Zara.

Zara: I saw that quiet cute guy in my class going home in this luxurious benz!😱 you should have seen it too, that guy's parents must be rich asf😬

I tuck my legs beneath, reading my best friend's message and imagining how her face would be like if she's in front of me. Energized Zara.

Zara: You there???

This girl is never patient. A faint smile form on my lips as I tap to reply.

Me: You mean the same guy that attempted suicide this morning?
You really should stay away from someone like that🙅🌚🤔...

The blue ticks display immediately, showing that she's on the chat. I rub my forehead with my thumb and forefinger, watching the three dancing dots which implies that she's typing.

Me: What's his name anyway?

I quickly add before getting down from the bed, dumping the phone face down. I walk to the edge where I kept the shopping bags and begin to take out what I got.

My brows knit in confusion as I take out something short. I tear out the wrapper and the shape draws slowly. It's socks. Ankle white socks to be exact. I place it aside, wondering when I picked a short socks of choice to buy. Scanning through the remaining items, my cellphone keeps making ding sounds and I push the items to the side to reply Zara's messages.

***

I walk down the stairs, groaning lazily as I slump toward the kitchen. I slept at 1am and woke up by six this morning, my eyes closed for only five hours.

Thanks to Zara.

We were chatting about random things I can't even point fingers to and I couldn't stop, she's just too funny to back from.

"Good morning aunt Jenny." I greet as I open the refrigerator and the coolness swallows my face.

Jenny is seated in the dinning with her eyes, her and whole attention on the laptop in front of her. I suppose she didn't hear me so I take out a small mini yoghurt pack, slamming the door afterwards.

That made Jenny take her head up because she smiles at me, closing her laptop. "You're awake, how are you?"

I settle in front of her, peeling the cover open and shove a spoon in. "I'm good...what're you doing?"

She exhale sharply, pushing the system aside. "I was just...doing some work, since I didn't go."

I nod slowly, taking a spoonful in my mouth and the gentle creamy taste fills my mouth.

"Is that your breakfast?"

I nod again, pushing the yoghurt to her but she gently push it back to me, shaking her head.

"You can't take only this for breakfast, I'll make something for you." Jenny says, getting up and my eyes follow her to the kitchen. I won't mind taking yoghurt as breakfast but since Jenny is here, she won't allow that, that alone makes me heart melt with love.

"Thanks Aunt Jenny." I say in a low voice but she heard me anyway.

"You're welcome sweetie."

***

I stroll down the scanty hallway, dragging my feet on the tiled floor. School is a bit quiet as it is still quite early which I prefer, than noisy students crowding and making fun of themselves. I stop by at my locker to take out necessary textbook I'd need for the day.

I slam the locker closed and walk down to grade 12 sapphire, one annoying hell of a classroom.

A relaxed sigh leaves me as I enter my class to see no one. I glance at my wristwatch which reads 7:02am and my lips stretch in a smile, pleading with aunt Jenny to drive me to school was worth it.

I wave my knapsack and wear it around my chair before tucking in the rumpled shirt into the pleated skirt. Even with how my sweet aunty begged me to wear the ankle socks she sneakingly got for me, I ended up wearing the most comfortable one I love. White pantyhose. The last time I recall wearing a shorter socks was in grade 9 or so, when I used to get stared at a lot because of how thick my legs and rear is.

Seating on my chair, I bend to tighten the loose lace of my sneakers when the scent of wild cherry perfume almost block my nostrils, accompanied by light footsteps. I glance up to see frowning Fabiola, walking towards me, or her seat at the back.

She stops right in front of me and I raise my head, taking my legs out of the way. Of course I'm expecting her to flare up as to why my legs are in her way or ask for assignments for her to submit as per, class rep duties but she just walk pass me. Just like that. Something must be wrong with her.

She seat on her chair and draw the smooth wooden desk closer. She look at me and I quickly divert my eyes to the front.

"Why were your fat legs in my way?"

Yep, and she asked.

I turn back to Fabiola and see that she's now rested on her seat, arms folded. I already knew she was going to ask.

"Seriously?" I tilt my head like I'm not affected by what she said. Fat legs. I know my legs are a bit fat but that shouldn't be the only thing she can rub in my face. "Because I was knotting the lace of my shoe."

She nods as she unzips her bag and bring out visible heavy textbooks which I believe is either history or literature.

"You can turn in your assignments before others arrive." Fabiola says, flipping through the big book on her table.

Should I call this mood swing or...

I quickly pull out some notes and stand to place on her desk before she would change her mind. Fabiola of today seems...nice?

Another footsteps drag my eyes to the doorway again. It's Kenny, the tallest boy in class.

"Hey..." He smiles and me and I giggle at how cute he is. If I stand beside him, my shoulders would be just a bit above his waist, that's how tall he is.

"Hi Kenny."

He goes to seat beside Fabiola who just roll her eyes, looking irritated, I don't think I'll ever understand this girl. Our class teacher keeps changing our seats for reference purpose but it still ends up this...detached.

I move closer to the window, staring down at people who're just coming in or alighting from their vehicles. The view from up here is quite nice and perfect, I won't mind coming this early from now on.

"Here, my literature assignment." I heard Kenny say and I glance over my shoulders. Fabiola glares at him before snatching it from it and Kenny doesn't act like he cares, one normal someone in my class. He look at me and I laugh softly, making him laugh too.

I peep out the window again and sight a known figure, taking selfies as she walks into the school gate. Zara Derry. No matter the eyes looking at her, she didn't even care, just doing what she loves.

I take a deep breath, taking my eyes off but looking back immediately. Mrs Devi is walking towards her office and I sprint out of class, I need to tell her that I love the idea of been tutored on literature.

And that I also love money.

No way, I can't tell her that. By passing the bunch of students in black skirts, black trousers, stripe tie, and brown blazer, I run down to meet the principal before she gets too busy to attend to anyone.

Slowing down, I try to catch my breath as I sight her office which is after the staffroom.

Mrs Devi is greeted by students as she make her way towards her office while I stand beside it, waiting. She deeps her hand in her leather handbag and brought out a key, her blue sequence gown glistening as she walks.

I clear my throat, my fingers intertwined at my back. "Good morning ma."

She lifts her head, her face lightening up. "Salome, how are you?"

"I'm fine ma."

She push the key in and turn the door open, walking in instantly. I press my lips, going after her.

"Looks like you've made up your mind." My principal says, drawing the curtain open to reveal the direct sun perching from the window.

"Yes ma, I also want to do better."

Oh yeah,I'm sure about that.

Mrs Devi dusts her hand and seat on her foamy chair. "Good...I love that." She nods and my smile widens.

"When will you start?"

"Today!" I quickly answer then notice the directness in my tone, making me look down. "I mean, today ma."

She takes out some files from the drawer and put them on the desk. "Okay, But you'll be tutored my Mrs Wright."

My mouth fall open as my brows furrow in great disappointment. I wanted Mr Alex to tutor me.

"I...I thought you said I could choose." I slowly protest, already feeling broken and defeated.

Mrs Devi adjusts in her seat while I remain standing, trying to form unfazed.

"Yes, yes, it's just that Mr Alex is also tutoring someone else so he won't be able to take..." She trail off at the knock on her door. "Come in."

I fidget with the hem of my skirt, thinking of how my plan turned upside down right in front of me.

"Good morning ma."

That voice. That sounds like Mr Alex, the topic of our discussion. I turn to see my literature teacher keep some files on Mrs Devi's desk and I bite my lips, his scent invading my nose.

"Good...good morning sir." I greet, my eyes on my sneakers. He glance at me then back to the principal.

"Here are the files ma." He says straightforwardly to the woman on seat.

"Oh, yes. Thanks. By the way, I was just telling your student here that you won't be able to tutor her." Mrs Devi explains and even though I'm not looking up, I can sense his eyes on me.

"Yes, I won't. I'm occupied already." He says and I swallow. Why do I feel like I'm been rejected? The feeling of embarrassing myself yesterday couple with this rejection makes me feel clumsy and irrelevant.

I manage to see the look on his face which is the same, no atom of remorse, just straight and coordinated.

Mrs Devi signs the files and stretch them back to my teacher who then turns to leave. I can feel my eyes sting with tears.

Please Salome, don't do this here.

The door closes gently and I turn to see Mr Alex is out. It feels like I should run after him and ask personally, but the fear but been turned down trap me to still remain standing.

"You can leave now, Salome."

My principal said those words and I didn't wait for her to hear the remaining part before storming out of her office and running towards my teacher. He's dressed in a white button down and brown trouser, almost entering the staffroom and I halt right in front of him, breathing heavily.

He stares at me emotionlessly and I pull out a tight smile, thinking of how to construct my words. I gulp then open my mouth and close it back.

"What is it?" He asks and I shake my head, moving out of the way for him to enter. I don't think I have the courage.

He motions to walk in but I heard what sounds like my voice escape my lips.

"I want you to teach me... Please."

He stop and spins around and I blink away, my fist tight in fear and embarrassment. I can't believe I just said that, someone please tell me it wasn't me.

Dear ground, please let me drop into you.

I look up to see that Mr Alex is still staring at me, enough to clarify that I said it with my mouth.

Aunt Jenny, it's for you and you alone.

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