hello it is time to ramble
i want to talk about death

YES YOU HEARD CORRECTLY i wanna talk about death. listen, tell me if u feel me on this,

i wanna grow old and wrinkly (I LOVE WRINKLES LOL) and dress like a badass grandma with red eyeshadow, eyeliner and tattoos and just chill and maybe have some cats and hella cactus.
BUT

i kinda wanna die young??? like, i dont want to experience the distress that elder go through when they realize they dont have too long left, and the last few years fly by. BUT STILL. im scared i'll miss something important if i die in my 30's.
UGH IM SO
i dont plan on dying young, like yall dont worry. IM JUST SO CONFLICTED UGH EMOTIONS.

i've been talking to Embla (-mandontrashaF) a shit load lately i'm sure theyre gonna get tired of my nagging soon but WHATEVER- anyway, i have no idea how it happened, but we were suddenly talking about David Bowie and Mick Jagger fanfiction??? and ofc i decided to google it to see if it excisted??? AND IT DID AJAH i read it out loud and like, oh god it was so, what do i say. pretentiously, exquisitely written. here, let me find this real quick so that you can get a clear picture

"Fuck, yes – I'm gonna cum," gasped Mick, whose cock had engorged to maximum extension. Joaquin wrapped his lips around the head once more, preparing to receive the creamy emission. Mick bucked his hips as he felt a clenching of all his well-developed muscles, starting at the feet and rushing upwards in overwhelming torrents.

who. THE FUCK. says "creamy emission" instead of CUM or JIZZ. THE WHOLE OF THIS LONG ASS FIC IS WRITTEN THIS WAY. im very simple in my way of writing and taste in literature, but reading 10k long novels written in an overly obnoxious authentic text style makes my head ache like NO thank you.

it was also weird and kinda gross why would you write fan fiction about two old dudes (one whom is deceased) fucking and having a threesome??? theyre not even that attractive y'all act like they are the epitome of beauty like nooo. im sorry. no im not.

speaking of embla, i drew this beautiful and 100% accurate picture of her HAHAHA.

also, my pantyhoes are hanging on for dear life. people have told me to give them up already and i just n e v e r

i look like im trying to be alternative and different and emo SO BAD im yelling. i walk past this kindergarten twice a day (school) and the people working there tend to look at me strangely sometimes bcus of some of my clothing choices and i just :-)))dont mind me im just passing thruu:-)

im going to a music festival in my neighbor city (stavanger) next saturday with my mom and im SO pumped im gonna see Sløtface and Sassy Kraimspri and so many more :-))) its free and theyre playing a ton of shows all over the city (including some bus concerts, like the band plays acoustic songs on different trains into the city BUT NO ONE KNOWS WHICH IM YELLING)

LOOK at this band set-up #LocalBands&ArtistsREPRESENT #proudmom

ohmygod i just remembered something,, there's this band called Gary Bites that is playing, and they're pretty good, but, um.. i talked to one of the band members on Tinder and uhm...... it was pretty awkward and when he deleted me on Tinder it gave me an anxiety attack and i deleted the whole app tinder just made me very anxious all the time and ive been matched with people at my school AND ITS SO FUCKING AWKWARD WHEN I SEE THEM AT SCHOOL I WANNA DIE IN A HOLE SM WHY AM I SO SOCIALLY AWKWARD AND ANXIOUS IM SO MAD. ok bottom line is, i wanna go see Gary Bites too but i'm scared he'll recognize me :-)

i know, first world problems. fml honestly. and the day before the festival, im going to my friend's 18th birthday party and there's going to be alcohol and people i dont know. ive always been like "underage drinking is NOT COOL>:-(((" but honestly, i dont care at this point, sure , i'll drink idc ahaha especially if i just get slightly buzzed so that i get out of my shell, i dont plan on getting absolutely smashed, especially not if i'm going to a festival in the noon the next day with my mother, and possibly the friend i already mentioned. btw, her name is Mari, there.

ahhaha when i told my mom i was going her birthday party my mom was like "is there going to be alcohol>:-|" and i just :-))maybe, because, like OF COURSE there's going to be drinks qhahhaha wtf and my mom was like "if youre going to be drinking DONT DRINK SPIRIT/VODKA bcus u'll puke and you'll be DEAD the next day and you won't be able to get up and go to the festival u just want to day" and i just ok mom ty i'll avoid the vodka. and then she admitted that she was already drinking at the age of like,, 14 and that she stole alcohol from her dad with her friends and she wouldnt give me shit if i drank anything bcus she knows im a good girl;-) also it would be hypocritical

HAHHAA i just told my dad too that i was going to the party and he was also like "is there gonna be drinks??" and i just 'ye' bcus why bother lying??ofc there's going to be drinks Mari's EIGHTEEN and there's going to be OTHER EIGHTEEN YEARS OLDS, and i expected him to start ranting, but instead he was like "if there's free drinks, NEVER say no!!" and that was basically all and i was dying oh my god.

i love my parents sometimes.

i'm scared Mari is gonna be all Motherly and baby sitter over me, like, "KRISTINE PUT. THAT. DOWN" and "KRISTINE HAVE YOU DRUNK ANYTHING IM SO DISAPPOINTED" because the conversation was like this:

Mari: but people will be drinking

Me: idc

Mari: that's good!!!

Me: yay!!'Mari: i have soda for youMari: or whatever the fuck u want

Me: ;-)

ye.. oh well.

YELLING bcus i started writing this last night and i had already named the chapter exactly what it's called and when i went to bed i checked my notifs and

coincidence?? I THINK NOT!

im sorry that this is so long and random (xD iM So rAndOm rAWRRCx)(no) but i wanna do these tbh idc what u have to say this is my book, if you think its boring and uninteresting and stupid, y tf do u have this in your library honestly. i dont write in this to be funny or entertain you, go read someone elses rant book if thats what you want, honestly.

also, im not sure about the vlogs anymore bcus it got mixed responses and i feel like its almost too "tryna be a youtuber", and i know many think its stupid and it feels kinda wrong, it was just something i wanted to try out for fun. maybe i'll do something later when i feel like it, but i'll definitely keep doing these videos that i posted last chapter and similar.

i also realized i forgot to add like,, two clips to the video, let me make a new one with those i missed.

https://youtu.be/7BBgktOMUgE

THERE IT IS

anyway. lmao @hyporcritical me saying "i dont CARE !! what u think about me and my book fuck off m8" and then literally in the next paragraph im like "idk what i feel about doing videos im scared to be judged :-/" ahahahaha. it just shows that i actually do care ;-)

if i bothered to read all of this yay you

i think its time to end this tbh see ya soooOOooon

please, love, suck a dick

- kristine