Aries- "Sit down, John, you fat MOTHER-"

Taurus- "Yeah. He's not the choice I would've gone with." 

Gemini- "It's hard to listen to you with a straight face." 

Cancer- "God, I hope your satisfied." 

Leo- "You stand only for yourself, it's what you do. I can't apologize because it's true."  

Virgo- "Your father is a scoundrel, and so, it seems, are you." 

Libra- "Awesome, wow." 

Scorpio- "Turn around, bend over, I'll show you where my shoe fits." 

Sagittarius- "Oh my god. Tear this dude apart." 

Capricorn- "You're absolutely right, John should've shot him in the mouth. That would've shut him up." 

Aquarius- "My dog speaks more eloquently than thee." 

Pisces- "I'm not here for you."