22. Confessions


Zam was in a fantastic mood when he got back to his flat. Not only had he just won a several month long battle against the Monetary Policy Committee, but he'd also become a multi-millionaire and so money was no longer an issue for him. On top of that, he still held power over two of the committee members as his evidence of their wrongdoings hadn't simply gone away and so if they attempted to hit back at him, he could always whip out the same blackmail again. No, the MPC would have to be much smarter if they were to stage a counterattack and in reality, it probably wasn't really worth their time.

That was what really lifted Zam's spirits. He hadn't just won the battle; he'd won the war in a decisive fashion and it didn't really get any better than that. This was probably his greatest ever success and nothing could bring him down right now. Things hadn't gone exactly to plan, but then again, did anything really ever go as planned? Being almost killed had put a spanner in the works for a brief moment but it helped him to discover the true culprit behind Amelia's murder and when he realised the truth, the opportunity had just been too good to not take. He was practically forced to make his move and in doing so he'd been victorious. Today had been a great day.

"Taylor!" he called out as he entered his flat. "I did it! I won!" She was sitting on the sofa in a loose-fitting white t-shirt and a very short pair of black shorts.

"So, it was her?" she asked swivelling around to face him.

"And it was exactly as I said she did it!" he grinned, unable to contain his excitement as he ran and jumped onto the sofa, landing next to his partner. "You should've seen me Taylor, I was just awesome in there. I managed to get a full confession and statement out of her and then she agreed to pay me ten million Poképounds to not reveal any of the information. That's Zam the Hybrid one, MPC nil."

"That's amazing!" she beamed. "So, are you finally done dealing with those people?"

"Yeah, I'm finished with them," Zam nodded. "Now come on, let's celebrate."

"Quick glass of wine first or—" He didn't let her finish. He pounced on her, pinning her down to the sofa cushions before kissing her soft lips passionately, barely allowing her to breathe. She pushed him off, looking wide-eyed as she inhaled deeply. "Have you been drinking already?"

"No, I'm just in a really good mood," he admitted. Unable to contain himself, he threw off his blazer and shirt, tossing the items of clothing across the room, leaving him topless. He then gave her the same treatment, quickly removing her t-shirt and exposing her bra.

"Hey Zam, before we do anything, I have something to tell you," Once again, Zam cut her off, this time by placing a series of kisses on her neck, slowly making his way down towards her breasts, forcing a moan out of the blonde. She stopped him going further by pulling him back up so that she could kiss him on the lips again which wasn't something he was particularly opposed to, he was just after more than that tonight. "No seriously, I've got some really important news," she said when she broke the kiss for a moment.

"I'm sure it can wait until the morning," he said casually, trying to shrug it off.

"Zam..." she started before Zam cut her off again, connecting their mouths lavishly, their tongues dancing as they traded saliva. Slowly, he began moving a hand down Taylor's body, causing her hips to buckle as he got closer and closer to his destination before finally reaching her knickers. He stuck his hand down her underwear. She jumped and screamed but not out of pleasure. "Zam, I'm pregnant!"

Zam froze. His mouth hung open a little bit as he tried to process the information. Very, very slowly, he retracted his hand from Taylor's panties. He sat up so that he was no longer on top of Taylor, allowing her to also sit up. She shifted closer to him, took his hand and gave him a worried look.

"Zam?" she asked. He didn't respond. "Zam!"

"So... you're pregnant?" he asked, half hoping that he'd simply misheard.

"Yeah," she replied sheepishly.

"Have you been sleeping with anyone else?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure!" she insisted. She can't have been right. It was impossible. Surely whatever test she'd taken was wrong or maybe she and Tristan had been getting it on behind his back. "In the past year, you're the only person I've had sex with."

"And you're definitely pregnant?" he asked again. Maybe her answer had changed in the last ten seconds.

"Definitely," she nodded. "I've taken several tests. I'm fifteen weeks pregnant and you're the father." He glanced down, horror struck. There was a bump. Nowthat it had been pointed out to him it was all too obvious, but how? How couldhe have missed this? 

"But we use condoms!" Zam cried out.

"Yeah, but they only work something like ninety-eight percent of the time," Taylor pointed out. "So really, we've been quite lucky to last this long."

"But this wasn't supposed to happen!" he yelled, burying his face in his hands. After a few seconds, he snapped back upright, determined to fix this problem. "Abortion."

"It's not right," she whispered. "I don't think it's right."

"Adoption!"

"Zam!" she cried. "Look, I'm having this baby whether you like it or not. I know that it's not ideal and it's not really the right time in our lives but why not? I'm having a baby! I'm starting a family; I'm going to be a mother! So, what do you say? Do you want to raise this baby with me? Is my baby going to have its Daddy?"

"I..." Zam breathed. He didn't know what to say. He was scared. His heart was pounding, his throat was dry and not a single one of his five thousand IQ points could think of an all-around perfect solution. "I can't. Taylor, I can't do it. I... I just can't."

"But Zam, this is our baby we're talking about," Taylor desperately protested. "This is for us!"

"I'm sorry Taylor, I can't do it."

"Why not?" she demanded.

"Because I'm dying!" he yelled. She was shocked. "Look, the doctors who performed my surgery back in the day did their best but at the end of the day, it was an impossible job, trying to stitch together two systems that don't quite line up. It's like trying to do a jigsaw with pieces that don't quite fit. Sure, you can force them in but it won't look right, it just doesn't quite work."

"So?"

"So, my body just doesn't quite work properly," he explained. "My heart beats unusually quickly, my blood pressure is way too high, most of my organs are failing. My body is dying; it's unable to maintain my brain and there's nothing I can do about it. When I found out that I had maybe, five years left at most, I made a decision. I promised myself that I would make the most of what little life I had rest. I vowed to lead the most exciting life possible and Taylor, I'm really, truly sorry but raising a child just isn't a part of that life."

"What could be more exciting than raising your own baby?" Taylor asked, tears beginning to form in the corner of her eyes.

"Taylor, I wouldn't get to do any of the things that make me... me!" he argued. "I wouldn't get to fight crime or make cool gadgets or take down evil organisations or anything like that. I wouldn't be Zam the Hybrid anymore; I'd be a normal guy living a normal life and I can't be normal! I can't waste my life away like that!"

"Waste away?" Taylor cried in disgust. "Spending the rest of your life with me and our lovely child? Is that what you think a wasteful life is?"

"Taylor..."

"I love you!" she yelled. "I don't know why, I don't know how but I am just madly in love with you and I don't know how to stop and I don't know if I could live without you so please, please don't do this to me. Sammy, please."

"I..."

"Do you love me?" she demanded. He met her fiery eyes. Through her tears, he could see those beautiful blue eyes filled with an odd blend of happiness, sadness and hope. How could he answer that question? How could he possibly answer that question? He took a deep breath and sighed.

"Taylor, I'm a human-Pokémon hybrid. I don't know what human love is and I don't even know if I'm capable of it. I'm sorry Taylor, but the truth is, I don't think I could ever truthfully answer that question the way you want me to. So, I guess, what I'm saying is no. I don't love you."

He couldn't prepare himself for what came next. Taylor gave an almighty screech, or maybe it was a howl or a wail and then she attacked him. Brutally. Zam found himself hunched over on the floor, taking slaps to the face, kicks to the gut and what felt like a rolled up newspaper strike him on the back of the head. He didn't try and defend himself. He wasn't entitled to do so. He deserved this beating.

Eventually, his torture came to an end. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Taylor storm off into his bedroom, looking angrier than he'd ever seen anyone. For a while, all he heard was cursing and insults that were generally directed at him but that soon stopped. Then she started sobbing. The noise was unmistakable. It was the sound of sadness and pain being poured out from a broken heart, the sound of hopes and dreams being crushed, a sound that nobody wanted to hear. Hearing it was so much worse than Taylor's savage attack. This hurt him so much more. What had he done?

He lost track of time just laying here on the living room floor. At some point, Taylor had exited his bedroom with a suitcase before storming out of his flat and slamming the door shut. He still didn't feel like getting up. This was the lowest of all lows. He felt worse than he'd ever felt. He'd literally turned the woman who loved him against him and broken her heart. This was really not how this night was supposed to have gone.

He estimated that at least four hours had gone by when he finally dragged himself to his feet, wincing with pain as bruises had started to form all over his body. He glanced around his flat, already feeling Taylor's absence. She'd been living here for so long, he'd forgotten what being alone felt like. It felt bad. He looked at the door, almost expecting to see her bursting back in to apologise for leaving him.

"And what's she going to apologise for?" Zam asked himself. "I'm sorry you broke my heart and scarred me for life. Since then, I have come to my senses, have given up my baby and will be moving back in with you shortly." Zam didn't know how to feel. He'd never experienced anything like this. His head felt like a jumbled up mess of emotions and every now and then one of them would come out on top, causing a momentary outburst.

"Of course, the whole argument was completely ridiculous," he pointed out. "She just chose the worst possible outcome for herself. She literally said she couldn't live without me and then she was gone just like that! I mean, that's just completely illogical!"

"Having said that, I was almost entirely to blame," he admitted, feeling a pang of guilt. "I could've just lied and said yes and everything would've been fine and maybe I said some things that I really shouldn't have said."

"She could've at least waited until after we had sex."

"Why did this have to happen to me? What have I ever done wrong?"

"It's just not fair!" he yelled all of sudden, jumping to his feet. His blood was boiling. He was angry. Properly angry. He started leaping around the kitchen in an enraged state, completely livid with himself, or Taylor, or the reproductive system or something. He kicked cabinets and threw chairs around. He screamed in anger. "This should've been the perfect day! This was my day! I survived being poisoned in the morning, I solved the case, won the battle against the bad guys, got the money and all I had to do was come home and shag my girl and it would have been a perfect hero's day. It was the day that everyone dreams of having but nobody ever gets and yet somehow – somehow – I've ended up as the villain here! I mean, how is that even possible? How did I cock this up that badly? It's not fair! Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"You awigh' mate?" Zam stopped destroying his kitchen for a moment to see a tired and worried looking Tristan in a dressing gown standing in his doorway. He took a deep breath and then fell to his hands and knees, tears streaming from his face to the ground, splashing his carpet. All of his anger was gone, he'd got it all out. What he hadn't got out was the sadness.

"She's gone Tristan," he sobbed. "She left me. Stormed out. She's not coming back."

"Come on mate, cheer up," Tristan said, speaking softer than he'd ever done before. His friend pulled him up so that he was sitting on the floor before sliding down next to him and putting an arm around his shoulder. "Firs' break up eh?"

"Yeah," Zam croaked.

"You just gotta be posi'ive," Tristan said. "So what if she's off bein' a mardy bum? Ain't nothin' you can do 'bout it so why give two shits? You gotta jus' forge' abou' her awigh'?"

"How?"

"Easy mate!" Tristan grinned. "You get the booze flowin' and then all your troubles go away. And then, once yer smashed, you go an' do all the shit you couldn't do when she was around. You pick up slags at bars an' 'ave one nigh' stands. You do weird shit that she wouldn't let ya. Tell you wha', why don't we go an' finish that car eh? Fun little project to take your mind off it, how's 'at sound?"

"Yeah," Zam nodded, wiping the tears from his eyes. "Yeah, let's do it. Thanks mate."

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