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#NY13 Chapter 13

"Are you okay?"

I looked at Sean who was standing beside me. He was holding a cup of coffee and was staring at me. "No," I honestly said. It's only been a day since that... row with Eli, yet I felt very unsettled. Eli's a very understanding person and I knew he meant well when he did not tell me about that incident. It was just a reflex—maybe a bad one at that. I was so used to people giving unwarranted opinion about my daughter that my first reaction was always to be on the defense mode.

But Eli's not the enemy.

He's on my side.

"Why? What's wrong? Is everything all right?" he asked, sounding worried. I just looked at him and shook my head. "Kelsey..."

I smiled. "No, I'll be fine," I said as I grabbed my phone and walked away. Sean's a friend and I knew that I could talk to him about anything... but it didn't feel right to talk with him about Eli. It would feel like betrayal.

After my duty, I picked up first the food I ordered for Eli and then went straight to their house. I wasn't exactly thrilled because his sisters would be there, but I didn't want to prolong the silence between us.

Besides, I was the one at fault.

I should apologize.

"Hi," I said when it was Esme who opened the gate. She just nodded at me. "Is Eli there?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Wala. May pinuntahan siya. Bukas pa makaka-balik. Hindi ba sinabi sa 'yo?"

My lips parted.

He left?

Without mentioning it?

Was he really mad at me?

"Oh," was all I said.

Esme's face was impassive. I couldn't tell if she was pleased that I was left in the dark or—I seriously didn't know.

"Esme," I called. She was looking at me. I sighed before I continued. "Is Elena inside? Can we have a chat?" I asked.

She blinked. "Para saan?"

I drew a deep breath again. "Look, I really care about your brother and I know that he wants us to get along well... And I believe we got on the wrong foot. I thought maybe we can have a conversation and then you can ask questions and I can honestly answer you," I told her. Her lips parted in surprise. Like she didn't expect to hear those words from me. But I was not a kid—I didn't like dramas—especially if I know I could straighten it out with a simple conversation.

And they're Eli's family.

I didn't have to explain, but I wanted to.

Just for peace's sake.

After a few seconds, Esme nodded.

We got inside and Tita was sleeping. Elena was surprised to see me, but I just simply smiled at her.

"Hi," I greeted.

She simply nodded as Esme took the seat adjacent to mine. Elena looked at Esme like she was asking her why the hell was I inside their house. I drew another deep breath.

"I'm Kelsey Fuentes," I began. "I'm 33 years old. I have a daughter named Samantha. She's Eli's student. That's how we met. I work as a doctor. I just moved into an apartment with my daughter." I bit my lower lip as I tried to remember what more should I tell them about me. "Do you... have questions about me?"

It was awkward, but I sat there because I really wanted to get all the tension out. Eli's away and I wanted things to be back to normal when he gets back.

And I needed to apologize to him, too.

Shouldn't have reacted the way I reacted.

But they just remained silent.

"I know you're worried about Eli, and you have every right to be worried. Eli... he's so kind. He's probably the kindest person I know and I'm also worried about him—worried that someone would take advantage of his kindness," I told them. "I understand where you're coming from... so, I feel like I need to tell you and to assure you that I really like him and I care a lot about him."

Elena's face was softening a bit.

I knew she's just worried...

When I first heard her talking about me with Eli, of course that stunk. But when I thought about what she said and tried to place myself in her position, I understood where she was coming from.

Her baby brother's dating someone older—someone with a child.

It's a lot to take for some people...

Not everyone's like Eli.

Not every sees the world in his lenses.

Some people would call single mothers like me segunda mano... or that I was taking advantage of single guys like Eli.

It's just how the world works.

And it sucks a lot sometimes.

"My work pays well," I added because this was one of her concerns. "Samantha's father also works as a doctor and he's the one paying for most of her needs... so you don't have to worry about that. She's well taken-cared of."

They were still silent.

"She's also the only grandchild on both my side and her dad's side, so she'll be fine."

God, I hated talking about money. I felt like it's tacky, but they needed to be assured that I wouldn't leech off from their brother.

I sat there for a few more uncomfortable seconds, but I got no verbal response from them. I just smiled at them as I stood up.

"I really like Eli and I hope we can be civil. For his sake, at least," I said as I gave them a small smile. "Thank you for listening."

I did my part.

The rest, it's up to them.

I got out and got back in my car. I got the phone from my bag to send a text to him to tell him that I went to their house because I didn't want him to think that I snuck behind his back.

'Hi. Punta lang ako sa Quezon. Baka bukas pa ako babalik.'

My lips parted.

So... he texted.

He still informed me.

'Okay,' I replied. We'd talk when he gets back.

* * *

"Mommy, are you okay?" Sammie asked.

"Yes, mommy, are you okay?" Sean asked, mimicking Sammie's tone. Sammie giggled. I frowned at them.

"Go clean up," I told Sammie.

Tomorrow's the house blessing and Sean just dropped Sammie off. They went to some museum and Sammie brought home a lot of new books about dinosaur. I had a conversation with Sean about the books. As much as I liked that my daughter's into reading, there's just a lot of books. I told Sammie that we should donate the ones she's finished reading, but she was adamant about it.

I was almost convinced that I was raising a hoarder.

"Are you seriously telling me to get her a Kindle?" Sean asked.

"Yes."

"She's a kid."

"With hoarding tendencies."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes. Have you seen her room?" I asked. Sean rolled his eyes. "So, you agree with me."

"She just likes her books."

"And her toys and figurines and all the things she picks from outside," I continued. "Sean, she's on the way to become a hoarder."

"Then we'll get her a bigger room. And a storage unit."

My lips parted. "Are you seriously going to tolerate her hoarding things?"

"Kelsey, she's a kid and she likes books."

"I'm not saying she should stop reading—"

"Yes, but you're suggesting I get her an iPad!"

"Kindle, Sean! It's for reading!"

We were arguing about whether or not it's appropriate for Sammie to have a tablet when the door swung open. We were outside because it was nighttime and the air was cold. Sammie was already in her pajamas and she was looking at us with her eyes wide open.

"I heard my name," she said.

"Teeth?"

She showed me her teeth. "I brushed, mommy."

"Milk?" Sean asked.

Sammie nodded. "Yes, daddy, before I brushed my teeth," she replied. "I heard my name and books, daddy. Will you buy me more books?"

Sean looked at me and I glared at him. He just laughed at me as he nodded at his daughter. God!

Sean was laughing and Sammie was smiling and jumping. I was shaking my head because I could only imagine the pile of books these two will bring home.

I was busy glaring at Sean when my eyes darted outside and saw Eli looking at us. My eyes widened in surprise. He's back!

I immediately stood up and excused myself. Sean just nodded because he saw Eli, too. I hurried outside.

"Hey..." I said. He was standing outside the driver's seat like he was ready to leave. "Didn't know you're back."

He just nodded. "Nagtext ako na pupunta ako."

My lips parted. "My phone's inside," I replied. "Have you eaten dinner yet?" He nodded. "Coffee?" I asked but I saw him glancing at the direction of Sammie and Sean.

I pursed my lips.

"Sean dropped Sammie off—they went to a museum."

He nodded. "Bukas na 'yung sa blessing."

I nodded. "You'll come, right?"

He nodded again. "Ano'ng oras mo ako gusto pumunta?" he asked. There was something with the tone of his voice... Was it because of Sean? But I already told him that there's nothing between us... We're just raising Sammie together because we're her parents.

"As soon as you can," I replied.

"Okay."

I sighed. "Eli..." I said, but he just looked at me. "I went to your house," I continued. His eyes widened a little. "Your sisters didn't tell you?"

He shook his head. "Hindi. Baka mamaya pa pag-uwi ko."

I blinked. "You haven't gone home yet?"

"Pumunta muna ako rito."

My lips parted. "Eli—"

He smiled at me, but his smile felt sad.

God, I felt bad.

Seeing him sad was making me feel really bad—like I did something terribly wrong.

"Siguro mga alas-siete nandito na ako," he said as he opened the door of his car. "Mauna na akong umuwi—pagod pa ako sa byahe," he continued before he drove away.

I stood there, unable to process how I just let him go home without so much as telling him my apologies for how I reacted the last time.

Why did my words fail me?

I hated seeing him like that.

"Are you okay?" Sean asked.

I shook my head and said, "Can you stay here for a little longer?"

His forehead creased. "Why?"

"I'm going to Eli," I said before I rushed back to the house to get the key. I needed to apologize tonight and to remind him again that to me, it's him—just him. 

*** 

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