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#MY11 Chapter 11

"Seriously?" I asked, frowning nang si Levi ang makita ko nang buksan ko ang pinto. I was only in my bathrobe. Binuksan ko lang talaga iyong pinto dahil akala ko ay iyon iyong order ko na room service. I was tired from all the gravity defying stunts that I did last night tapos nakaka-pagod din iyong presentation. As much as I wanted to go around, my body needed rest.

Balak ko sanang manood ng koreanovela and to eat on bed... but then again, nandito na naman itong asungot na 'to.

"Dinner?" he asked.

"I'm good."

"How about going around? I can be your tourguide," he said.

"Pass."

"Sex, then?"

"Wala ako sa mood."

His brow arched a little. "I have a remedy for that," he said, and then lifted up a paper bag. Na-curious ako kaya kinuha ko iyon. I frowned so hard nang makita ko na nandun iyong uniform niya. Leche 'to, ah! He knew my weakness and he's exploiting it!

I hated it, but I was impressed.

"Fuck you," I shot at him.

"Yes, please?" he replied, looking at me with his puppy eyes.

Nakaka-loka 'tong lalaki na 'to!

I rolled my eyes at saka tinalikuran siya. I heard him laugh a little. Mukhang nag-e-enjoy siya na bwisitin ako.

"So, what is it? Dinner, stroll, or sex? I'm honestly good with any. Although you look like you're more prepared for sex."

Bigla akong napa-hawak sa suot ko. Bigla tuloy akong na-conscious! Kaasar! As if naman mahihiya pa ako e bawat sulok ng katawan ko e nakita na nitong si Levi—'di lang nakita, natikman din. So wala na talaga akong dapat ikahiya.

"Shut up," I replied. "If you wanna stay here, fine. Wala naman na rin akong energy makipag-argue sa 'yo ngayong gabi," I continued as I plopped myself on the bed and made myself comfortable. Bahala siya d'yan. Mapapagod lang din ako na sabihan siya na tigilan ako kasi obviously, hindi naman siya nakikinig.

"Can you scooch?" he asked nang maupo siya sa gilid ng kama.

"Lumipat nga ako ng room, dito ka naman nanggulo," sagot ko nang wala rin akong nagawa kundi ang umusod dahil tinulak niya rin ako. Gago talaga.

"Have you eaten dinner?" he asked.

"Room service."

"Don't you wanna go out? I know a nice resto that you'll love."

"Pagod ako."

"Oh, okay. We can just stay here," sabi niya tapos ay naramdaman ko na pina-libot niya iyong braso niya sa balikat ko at hinalikan iyong gilid ng ulo ko. "I'm sorry. Please, let's stop fighting."

I remained silent.

My eyes were glued at the TV.

"My lola has brain tumor."

Napa-awang ang labi ko.

We were sitting on the bed with our backs against the headrest. There was some show playing in the background, but I was more attuned to the words that were coming from Levi's mouth.

"Her doctor said that it's inoperable."

"Did you ask for a second opinion? A third?" I asked, unable to help myself. As much as I hated what Levi did, I liked his lola. She's nice to me. She wasn't mean. Actually, lahat ng kamag-anak niya ay mabait sa akin. Though I really started to wonder kung mabait lang ba sila sa akin because they needed me to feel welcome dahil kailangan kong magpa-kasal kay Levi.

Really...

That one simple omitted truth did a number.

Siguro kay Levi maliit na bagay lang 'yun.

But it made me question a lot of things...

"Eight," he replied. "They all said the same thing."

My lips just parted, but no words came out. Suddenly, I didn't know what to say... It's just different this time. Hindi kagaya ng kapag kinakausap namin iyong pamilya ng pasyente.

This was different.

This was Levi's lola.

I just couldn't bear to tell him that he'd be fine because I didn't know that for sure. I never really lost anyone... Buhay pa pareho ang mga magulang ko. Wala pa talagang nawawala na malapit sa akin.

But I'd seen people lose people.

It looked... so hard.

The kind of pain that you'd want to forever avoid if only you could.

"It's not as if she gave me an ultimatum," he said, pulling me closer to him. "She just told me... She told me that she worries about me, and that if I could, I should find myself someone who'd love me and take care of me."

"Then why did you suddenly propose when I told you na pinuntahan niya ako sa hospital?" I asked. I felt him taking in a deep breath.

Levi removed his arm around my shoulders. It felt... I didn't know the exact words. But definitely, having his arm around me felt much better.

I liked him still.

I never said that I didn't anymore.

I just couldn't trust him—and that made all the difference.

"Because I thought she told you that she wanted me to get married. Lately, she's been acting differently... The doctor said that her abrupt personality change's part of the symptoms," he said. He reached for the remote and turned the TV off. Pumihit siya paharap sa akin. "I wanted to ask you if she told you anything, but I coudln't exactly. Julienne, you weren't exactly forthcoming with me. I'm not an idiot—I know that there were lots of things you weren't telling me."

I arched my brow. "So, now this is my fault?"

He frustratedly raked his fingers through his hair. "No. God, no. Why are you so good at using my words against me?"

I shrugged. "Talent."

He groaned. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang hawakan ng dalawang kamay niya ang mukha ko at saka hinalikan ako. Bahagyang nanlaki ang mga mata ko. I thought it was just a peck... but then he started kissing me.

Slowly.

So painfully slow...

But this felt different...

I felt the beat of my heart as his lips moved against mine.

"You're so frustrating, you know that?" he asked when he finished nibbling my lips.

"So I've been told. A couple of times. Today."

He chuckled against my lips. "I'm sorry I didn't just tell you. I was just... conflicted," he said. He pulled back a little. "Had I told you earlier, would you have gotten mad?"

I wasn't able to answer.

Hindi ko rin kasi alam.

Getting married to satisfy a dying person's wish didn't exactly sit well with me. Kasi buhay ko pa rin naman 'to.

"It's okay," I said instead. "I'm not mad at that anymore."

A smile appeared on his face. "Really?"

I nodded. "Yes."

"Thank God," he replied.

"But we're still over."

The smile on his face quickly vanished. Mabilis kong inabot iyong remote at saka binuksan iyong TV. Kahit pa hindi ako naka-tingin kay Levi ay kita ko ang pagka-gulo sa mukha niya.

"I'm sorry... but what? And why?"

Finally, the doorbell rang. Nandito na sa wakas iyong pagkain ko! I ran towards the door and got the food. Pagbalik ko ay agad akong natigilan nang makita ko si Levi na naka-tayo at naka-tingin sa akin. There was a mixture of confusion and frustration on his face. I grabbed a slice of pizza on the plate and bit on it.

"What?" I asked.

"Are you serious?"

I nodded. "It's better this way, trust me. We wanted to get married too fast. Ni hindi pa nga natin kilala iyong isa't-isa. See how we're still discovering a lot of things about each other ngayon? What if magpa-kasal nga tayo tapos you discover things about me that you hate? Hassle, right?"

His face was contorted in confusion. "Help me here, Julienne. But isn't the sense of marriage is to be there for each other both in good times and bad times? What kind of husband will I be if I'd just ditch you when I find something I don't like?"

"I don't know, Levi."

"So, if you marry me and you find something you don't like, your solution would be to what? Hide in the hospital?"

I rolled my eyes. "Of course not. Magpapa-couple's therapy tayo."

Natawa siyang bigla. "There you go."

I rolled my eyes again. "That was a solution to a hypothetical problem, okay?" sabi ko at saka dumiretso para maglakad pabalik sa kama. Pero bago pa man ako maka-balik, hinarang ako ni Levi. I looked up at him. My brows were arched slightly.

"What... are you doing?" I asked as I watched him untie my robe.

"I'm calling a timeout. Arguing with you is making me horny," sabi niya at tuluyan nang nahubad iyong robe ko.

"I told you I'm tired," I said as he began kissing my neck. He gently bit me there and I moaned. Ugh! Involuntary reaction. "Ano ba..." I mewled when I felt his hand starting to wander down. Agad kong nabitawan iyong slice ng pizza at napa-hawak sa balikat niya nang maramdaman ko iyong daliri niya.

"You're tired?" he asked as he thrusted his fingers in me.

"Yeah..." I replied, panting hardly.

"It's okay. You don't have to ride me tonight," he whispered in my ear as he gently bit it. Pota talaga 'to! He really knew what words to say to open my legs!

"Levi..." I said. 

He stopped and looked at me. He licked his lower lip. "If you don't want to... I'll stop," he said, looking at me seriously. 

And there I was, panting and moaning and so confused! And horny!

I stared at him. 

He arched his brow. "So?"

I groaned and pulled him close again. "Yes! God, why am I so weak?!"

And so there I was... completely naked while Levi's still in his white shirt and denim pants... Making me come without even removing any article of clothing from his body.

"I hate you..." I moaned as I heard him undoing his zipper.

"No, you don't," he replied as I felt him sliding his dick in me. "And even if you do, the line that separates love and hate is a very thin line," he continued as began thrusting, making me forget why I was even mad at him in the first place. 

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