Aisha was left all alone to think about what's going on. It makes absolute no sense that she'd miscarried a child from her womb. How wouldn't she know that she was pregnant? That she was ruined by a man she's never known in her entire life? What the hell is happening around her that makes her feel like a fool?!

She tossed and turned around the bed then sat up, took a mirror from beside the bedside table inside Nawal's bag. Maybe she should see with her own eyes whether or not a man has touched her. She's never felt any sort of discomfort down there for as long as she could remember. And she's skipped her period which isn't the first time it's happened. She complained to a doctor once about it and he said it was normal, it happens which was why she acted completely normal with missing it for a month.

Then this doctor is telling her something different? But what is this fear gripping her guts at the thought of everything being true and right? That in a wild fantasy realm, the doctor is not wrong and she's lost a baby she didn't know she was carrying. That she was raped -it could only be that- by a man she's never seen and had no knowledge of. It is making her quiver, her senses shattering into uneven lengths.

With her heart racing beneath her pectorals at a pace that made her chest hurt, Aisha used the small powder mirror and started checking herself down there. She let out a gasp when she noticed that she's indeed changed from the sight she's seen a very long time ago. Perhaps time changed it? She excused uneasily, perspiration gathering all over her forehead as she thought about the accuracy of the situation. She'd die if this were proven to be right.

The hairs all over her arms and nape of her neck rise at attention, her limbs started shaking like a leaf. Aisha let go of the mirror that fell on the floor and broke into many pieces, she closed her eyes as she leaned her head against the headrest of the bed. This cannot be true! This is all a misunderstanding, everything is wrong about this situation. It has to be fucking wrong!

It was few minutes later into her mini hysteria when a cautious knock came from the door before it got opened by strong looking olive arms. She was staring at the ceiling aloof, her mind blank even as she felt the presence of someone in the room with her. It is none other than Ammar, his cologne and quiet footsteps screamed his name. Maybe she is starting to know everything about him, she is not liking it too.

Ammar arranged the things he's brought for her on the bedside table, removing Nawal's bag from it while being careful not to match the broken pieces of mirror on the floor. Done with that, he drew a small chair to the side of her bed and sat down quietly. Aisha refused to acknowledge his presence, he was okay knowing what she was going through. But he cannot keep staring at her looking lost, she isn't the Aisha he knew.

With that, he cleared his throat to bring back his woman. "Are you mad, Maid? You look mad."

Aisha took her time before she grumbled out in a monotone. "I'm not mad."

"Your face is screwed up in that impish way like you're mad about something." He insisted, his voice sounding a little childlike but anything to get Aisha off that depressed horse.

"I'm disturbed and afraid, not mad." She tilted her head down to send him a quelling glare which he returned with one of his innocent shrugs. Like he has no idea what was going on.

A few moment of silence before he opened his mouth again just when she's started to close her eyes. "You still look mad and not perturbed."

Though gritted teeth that conveyed her annoyance, Aisha ground out. "I am not mad but I'll soon be if you don't keep that your gob quiet!"

Ammar kept quiet for a little while before he stood up and decided to serve the food for her. She is taking this lighter than he'd expected though her eyes already looks puffy, she's cried her eyes out and still wants to keep going. He could tell how confused she is from the long dent between her brows, narrowed eyes that are dull and hollow down to her hands tightened around her blue hospital gown. The girl doesn't know what to do.

He served her her favorite pasta and the sprite he managed to sneak for her without Jannah's knowledge. She said Aisha should only have water so it can flush the remainder of blood from her uterus but he cannot not give Aisha what she wants even if that is against her health. Not that it is going to cause her any problem. Well, that is if she's got appetite for it.

Aisha ate the food, she never says no to food and before she continue to think about her life, food should always come first. Nothing is going to change what had happened, it is a mystery now that she wants to solve no matter how convoluted it looks. It doesn't matter whether or not she's got no starting point, she will reach the end.

Ammar sat back and watched her carefully, his expression serene but his mind and head in shambolic scrambles. He loves this woman in front of him with every fiber of his being, every cilia of it too. But the love intensified during Imara's mourning, he couldn't go a day without seeing how she is or if she's eaten or not. He gets worried whenever he leaves the house. He wanted to be around her all the time, still do. It is a kind of obsession he never knew existed.

He's been in love before or whatever it was he called what had happened with his ex back when he was in the college but this, it is out of ordinary. It was almost more than one man could bear, to be afraid for her and infuriated with her at the same time, and then to be overcome with a wave of love so intense that he could not speak. He could only sit down and analyze how that had happened so quickly.

As he watched her now, he was overwhelmed with so many emotions. He doesn't know where to begin with but showing Aisha sympathy at this moment will do nothing but break her spirit. She is hanging onto the little thread of sanity, he wouldn't want to rapture that with a few words so he took the nicest route that'll help her out.

"So... I heard what happened from the doctor. Isn't it weird that there is something in this world Aisha Hashem Garo doesn't know?" He tilted his head, lying his right cheek supine against his palm.

"Weird indeed and so stupid. How could I have been raped and I wouldn't know? That woman doesn't have sense at all. And my mother and yours? They believed her! Saying they saw the signs but kept quiet. What nonsense signs? I'm done dealing with so much at the same time, I want to run away!" She groaned, acutely yawing severe.

Ammar took his time, mulling over his words before he answered. "I thought so too." He mumbled out, earning her full attention because she sat up with wide eyes. Thought so?

"You thought so as in how? You believe her now?" She scowled at her, crossing her arms beneath her chest mutinously.

"Not like that. What she's said all made sense when we stepped out of the room. She told me about the drugs rapers now use to rape women and not get caught because you cannot remember anything. And I also asked around about her just to make sure the woman is in her right state of mind..." he sighed, tugging at the back of his head.

He did ask around and the replies he got goes along; "She can be a little bit too stern but there is nothing wrong with her mental health." Or "Yes, she tends to treat adults like children but that's all, she is totally fit and the best Obstetrics and gynecologist we have here."

Aisha was quiet for a long time then she abruptly started crying loudly, she started wailing like a child. She used her elbow to close her face, turning her back on him while her shoulders wrack. The pain, agony in her tears forced a few to gather in his eyes. Oh, for fuck's sakes! Why on earth is he crying because she is crying? He is supposed to console her right? Why is he confused instead? Why doesn't he know what to do?

He stood up and sat on the bed that is wide enough for the two of them, his hesitant arms stayed loosely around her while he contemplated on whether or not to cross the line. She is crying, confused, afraid, frightened and most of all, demolished. She's believed everything the woman had said because in the first place, she wasn't doubting it much. She's felt it too.

Before he could decide on what to do, Aisha fling herself around his arms in one sudden move that startled him. He sucked in a breath, his brain in shambles and mind wrecked beyond recognition.

But as soon as his arms had gone around Aisha, in one ordinary instant, the world, the past, the future, everything he'd always been certain of had all been obliterated. She had reached for him, not out of passion or fear, but the simple human need for closeness. It had electrified him. No one had ever sought comfort from him before, and the act of giving it had felt more unspeakably intimate than the most torrid sexual encounter. He'd felt the force of his entire being wrap around her in a moment of sweet, raw connection.

Is this how love is? Like something sweet is tickling his throat just because she is in his arms? God, he wants her there forever.

It was an hour later after aisha had drifted in and out of consciousness, she finally regained her senses enough for her to realize that she is wrapped around a man's arms and that too on a hospital bed. Maybe her mother had been in there while she was asleep? Or Hajiya Maimuna? Maybe Nawal or Jannah too! What would they think of her now?

A first grade whore for being in a man's arms after pretending and feigning innocent? After swearing she's never known any man in her life? They won't believe that she is innocent, she wouldn't believe so too. Why did she allow him to hold her this long? And why the fuck is he not moving away from her even after feeling her movements beneath him? What is Ammar playing at?

She pushed him with all the strength she's got but he only pulled her tighter into his arms. In what feels like a possessive grip? Is the man out of his senses now?

"Let go of me you moron!" She screamed or thought she screamed when all she managed to get out were a few gruntled words that didn't make sense.

If only she had screamed, he would've known how serious she was but she couldn't. She doesn't have enough energy for that. Her brain had expired at that minute, her mind in chaotic cacophony that is making her head fluctuate, her lips had finished working for the day it seems. She also feels as though her eyes are bleeding, raw and red. And filled to the brim with so much pain.

Ammar was whispering words of comfort and strength but she cannot hear past the discordant staccatos of her erratic heartbeat, his arms wrapped entirely around her to keep her firm against him. He was trying to keep her together through sheer physical force but it is no use, she felt nothing. The reality is sinking into her bones, an unknown fistula influx-ing it into her from God knows where. Ammar shushed her, rocking her back and forth in a comforting way.

Aisha cried, wondering why this sudden service of pity from him. He is going to leave her the minute they leave this hospital later because he would want nothing to do with her. Not even those little flirts he became so devoted to for the past few weeks. He won't call again to ask if she wants anything. Or just call in the middle of the night to disrupt her beauty sleep because he couldn't sleep or lie that she's bugging his dreams with a sword. She knew that was all a lie but wanted to talk to him too.

A strangled noise came from her throat. No one would want her. Her mother herself is going to distance herself like she did earlier. Maybe Jannah. Yes, only Jannah would stay. Through thick or thin.

"I still want you." He murmured in her ear as if knowing what was going through her mind, startling her in process. "I want all of you, inside and out. The witty and the docile. The sassy and the saucy. The maid and the student. I want you inside and out aching for me with a caught breath like I ache for you." He continued quietly, soothing down her hiccups because she's stopped to listen.

Ammar grinned when he realized that he's caught her attention and she's stopped crying. "It was never a secret that I liked you, everyone saw that but you. Of course, except you foolish girl. You're too slow."

Aisha shuddered, he is talking directly in her ear. "Yo-you never talked to-to me about it. You onl-only asked for friendship-ship weeks ago." She stuttered sounding flummoxed.

"Yes. I did and I still do want to be your friend." He nodded which she registered in the change of air between them. "I want to be the friend you hopelessly fall in love with. The one you take into your arms, into your bed and into the private world you keep trapped in your head. I want to be the friend you turn to for advise, the one you can fight with to cool off. That friend you can come to with even the most insignificant complaints, because I'll listen to each one of them. I want to be that kind of friend."

He took a deep breath, the words flowing out without his knowledge. "The one who will memorize the things you say as well as the shape of your lips when you say them. I want to know every curve, freckle, flab, every shiver of your body and the places..." he caught himself, this is not the time, "...darling." He heaved a sigh, he cannot continue.

Aisha swallowed thick and turn around. Ammar expected to see her all defensive, angry at his blunt sympathy and fake love confession. But she stared at him as if mesmerized, her breath coming in fits and starts. Her coral lips looking extra lush at this moment -Shaitaan loitering around waiting for time to strike.

Aisha pouted her lips as she pushed her face to the crook of his neck. She's never been this intimate to any man before but with Ammar, it feels natural. Oh, had she been hiding away her feelings intentionally? Because now they are overwhelmingly strong. She loved him. She could not resist his touch, nor her own unconquerable desire to please him, to touch him tenderly.

She murmured against his neck. "You need to leave this room right now before we give them another story later. I cannot think around you. I already feel like a cat sprawled over you like this and if anyone of them were to come in, I will gladly look compromised."

Ammar let out a gruntled laugh. "You naughty girl."