Dear John,

Wow.

Way to give a guy whiplash. After being so sure I would never talk to you again, already in the process of writing an apology letter, you go and hit me with an entire novella?

This new direction is highly approved of.

Yes, the old Captain will be sorely missed for his blunt attitude and double meanings – but One Direction was a popular boy band for a reason. (That probably doesn't make sense but I'm writing this while on the bus and it's not exactly the ambiance I was aiming for.)

Compass, I'm trying to sympathize with you having to fight to get a word edgewise with your sister... but as the talkative sibling, I'm the worst person you could turn to. If that wasn't clear enough for you already.

And on the note of Mr. Doubtful, the day hasn't come yet for me to truly wager if he is the perfection my mind's made him out to be. Which is a little embarrassing given the amount of fawning I've done over him.

Thought of the day: When is it time to move on from someone you're pretty sure you'll never have? When does a crush turn into full-on incineration of one's heart? And why won't my anonymous messenger appreciate references older than 2010?

That was probably a little too heavy and real, I don't think you're writing with the intention of having heart to hearts, so I'll switch gears. I got an A on my pop quiz, which was great I guess but I was a little disorientated. I think I've found my balance again, and it's pointing true north. Get it, a Compass pun.

Come on, admit you chuckled at that.

With Gratefulness,

Duck-a-saurus Rex.

P.-S-.---I---a-m---g-e-n-u-i-n-e-l-y---s-o-r-r-y---f-o-r---s-t-e-p-p-i-n-g--- o-v-e-r--- t-h-e--- l-i-n-e.---T-h-a-n-k-s---f-o-r---w-r-i-t-i-n-g---b-a-c-k,---y-o-u---r-e-a-l--l-y---d-i-d-n-'-t---h-a-v-e---t-o.---I---w-o-u-l-d'v-e---u-n-d-e-r-s-t-o-o-d.

P.S. I swear to NEVER mention One Direction again moving forward... Unless that's what you're into. I'll try not to judge your music taste/celebrity crushes (..?) too harshly.