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Chapter Sixteen

Fault

"Leo... I was just wondering... Did something else happen at Leon's party last time?" Mommy sighed after asking me. "Nakausap kasi ng Daddy mo ang isang staff ng hotel. And he was told that there was another man, and you fainted when you saw him..."

"At doon ka lang namin nakita ng Daddy mo sa labas nang tinawag na rin kami ni Yessabella at wala ka nang malay."

I looked at my mom. I was at my parents' house. Pagkatapos akong pinayagan ng doctor na makalabas ng hospital, I chose to stay with my parents instead of going home to my own house. At dalawang araw na simula nang makalabas ako sa hospital. And I haven't yet explained my reason to my parents, kung bakit ayaw kong umuwi sa bahay namin ni Yessa. Kaya alam ko na nagtataka na sila at may tanong din sila sa akin. Ayaw lang nila ni Daddy na pilitin ako magkwento sa kanila kung hindi pa ako handa.

Since I was little my parents had always let me do things at my own pace. It started with the little decisions I made when I was younger. Palagi lang nila akong hinahayaan ni Daddy na gawin ang gusto ko sa sarili kong desisyon. At hindi rin nila ako kahit kailan minadali sa pagsasabi sa kanila ng mga bagay tungkol sa akin. And they have always asked my permission to things related to me. Just like when my mom asked me if she could help in finding a girl for me before. Tinanong niya ako noon kung pwede raw ba niya akong tulungan sa babae na baka magustuhan ko rin. And that was also how Yessa and I met through my mom.

So I thought that I also didn't want to disappoint her when she knows about what really happened to me and Yessa. Kasi si Yessa rin ang pinili niya noon na babae para sa akin.

But I also didn't wanna lie to my parents. O maglihim pa ako sa kanila gayong alam ko na malalaman din naman nila. Because if I want to end my marriage with Yessa they would probably ask me about my reason.

"Who was that man and you seemed triggered when you saw him..." Mommy asked me again.

I didn't really want to tell my parents about it. Inisip ko na problema pa rin namin ito ni Yessa. So I didn't speak a single word about it at first. Pero ngayong nagtatanong na si Mommy ay alam ko na kailangan ko rin sumagot.

I stayed here because I didn't want to face Yessa yet. Nahihirapan din akong harapin siya ngayon. I can't face her or look at her without thinking of her and that man... Damn it.

Lalo na ngayong nanumbalik na ang mga alaala ko ay lalong naging mahirap para sa akin.

As for Leon, Yessa just probably told him that I was still at the hospital, kaya kailangan ko rin pumunta roon sa bahay para makita ang anak ko. I didn't want him to always worry about me.

And I've been also thinking, na bata pa si Leon. He might not understand our situation yet. He's too young to experience this...

I looked at my Mom. I want to be honest with her and tell her the truth. But in the end I realize that I wasn't yet ready to tell her about my wife's affair...

Kaya naman umiling lang ako at sa huli ay hindi ko rin nasagot si Mommy. At hindi na rin naman niya ako kinulit pa na magsabi sa kaniya. But then I knew that she was already curious. At alam ko na iniisip niya na may dahilan ang lahat. At dahil ayaw kong magsabi sa kaniya sa nangyayari sa akin ay si Yessa na pala ang kinausap niya.

And I didn't expect that Yessa would be honest with my mom.

Because the next day I learned that it was her who revealed what she did to me to my mother. Kaya naman galit na galit sa kaniya si Mommy pagkatapos ng nalaman at gustong kunin sa kaniya si Leon.

"Just get Leon from that cheater woman! File a divorce and tell the court of her affairs, Leonard!" Mommy said frustratedly.

I sighed a bit. "Mommy, please calm down..." Sinubukan kong pakalmahin siya.

"You know what she just told me when I asked her if you two have a problem? Ang sagot niya sa akin ay galit ka raw sa kaniya dahil nahuli mo siyang may iba!"

Bahagyang nanlaki ang mga mata ko habang nakatingin kay Mommy. Yessa really did tell her...

"And I was immediately furious at what she just revealed to me. Noong una ay hindi pa ako makapaniwala pero nakita ko sa mukha niya na mukhang nagsasabi siya ng totoo... I couldn't believe it but it was the truth! And what did she expect? S'yempre natural na magalit ka sa kaniya kapag nahuli mo siyang ganoon! At galit na galit din ako sa kaniya ngayon, hijo. I just could not believe it! Hindi ako makapaniwala na magagawa iyon sa 'yo ni Yessabella... Like how..." She sighed frustratedly.

"Mom..." I didn't exactly know what to say to her...

She looked at me. "Bakit hindi ka agad nagsabi sa amin ng Daddy mo, hijo? Sa akin? Dapat ay nagsabi ka agad... You got yourself into an accident because you caught your wife cheating on you..." Nanghina si Mommy pagkatapos.

Agad ko siyang dinaluhan upang alalayan. And she was so eager to even file some case to Yessa's infidelity to me... And take Leon from her...

Alam ko na nadadala lang din si Mommy ngayon ng galit niya...

At alam na rin pati ng parents ni Yessa ang totoong nangyari noong maaksidente ako...

Now our parents think that it was Yessa's fault why I got myself into an accident...

Hindi na ako masisisi ng in-laws ko. And my parents would support me, kung gusto kong makipaghiwalay kay Yessa.

But when I saw my little boy, I realized that I couldn't just separate him from his mom...

"Daddy!" Leon was so happy to see me again.

Yessa was just also in the house when I came home. Inuwi ko na ang anak ko pagkatapos ng ilang araw na nasa amin lang ako. At mukhang hindi rin muna pumapasok si Yessa sa ospital dahil sa problema namin...

"Leo..." At mukhang hindi rin niya inasahan ang pag-uwi ko ngayon. Because I didn't really tell her or anyone. At bastang nagpunta na lang ako ngayon dito.

At naabutan ko nga na nakikipaglaro pa siya sa anak namin kahit halata naman sa kaniya na mukhang hindi rin mabuti ang pakiramdam niya...

I wanted to ask her if she's just all right, but I focused my attention on Leon. Niyakap at hinagkan ko ang anak ko. Pagkatapos ay ako na rin ang nagpatuloy na makipaglaro sa kaniya. While Yessa asked the maid for some medicine...

When Leon took his nap at noon, pinili ko na rin na kausapin si Yessa. She was just in the kitchen at may wala nang laman na tubig ang baso na nasa harapan niya roon sa may kitchen counter.

"Yessabella." I called her.

Agad naman siyang bumaling sa akin nang marinig niya ang pagtawag ko. "Where's Leon?" She asked.

"He's having siesta now."

Tumango naman siya sa sinabi ko at muling humawak sa ulo niya.

"Are you sick?" Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko na magtanong sa kaniya.

Umiling naman siya sa akin. "I'm fine... Uh, I've talked to your mom..."

Nagkatinginan kaming dalawa. Pagkatapos ay muli pa siyang umiling. "I tried to explain to her further, but she was already angry..." She said.

"Why did you tell her?"

"Because it's the truth?" Tiningnan niya ako. "Iyon naman talaga ang kinagalit mo na nahuli mo ako sa hotel na may kasamang ibang lalaki..."

"Tho it's not really like that..." She said.

"How long..."

"Hmm?" Tumingin siya sa 'kin.

Tiningnan ko rin siya sa mata. "Gaano katagal na kayong nagkikita noon bago ko pa man kayo nahuli."

She guiltily bowed down her head after my question. Nag-iwas siya ng tingin at alam ko nang may ginawa na talaga siya noon pa. Pagkatapos ay muli siyang nag-angat ng tingin sa akin. At nakita ko sa mukha niya na mukhang humugot din siya ng lakas ng loob.

"I admit that... I was meeting with him sometimes before..." she bit her lip guiltily.

While I gritted my teeth as I listen to her.

"But it's because I just got confused too, Leo!"

Nagkatinginan muli kaming dalawa. "What do you mean?"

She bit her lower lip before she continued. "I already told you that he was my ex. Naghiwalay kami noon dahil mas pinili niya ang career niya kaysa sa akin. He was a young and aspiring Architect at that time, and he got an opportunity abroad. He wanted to take me... pero hindi ako sumama sa kaniya. Dahil hindi rin ako papayagan ng parents ko. They didn't even know that I was dating him... They were both so busy doctors to even pay attention to their daughter's love life. Bata pa lang ako ay alam ko nang nasa hospital lang umiikot ang mundo ng mga magulang ko, Leo. Kahit pa nandito ako na anak nila..."

She gulped a bit. Nakatingin na siya sa ibang bagay habang nagkukwento. Umiling siya. "So in the end I didn't went with him, and we broke up. And I was only thinking that he chose his career over me... Until sa maisip ko na hindi ko rin siya pinili dati, dahil hindi ako sumama sa kaniya... But I was young and naive..."

She looked at me with her tired and sick-looking eyes. "When we met, alam ko na gusto ka ng parents ko. At gusto rin ako ng mga magulang mo noon..." She bit her lip. "At nang makilala pa kita nasabi ko rin sa sarili ko na mabait ka naman at mabuting tao. You also treat me so well. Mabuti ka ring ama sa anak natin... So when I decided to marry you it was my decision."

She sighed and looked away a bit again. "Maayos ang lahat sa atin... At alam ko na ako lang ang sumira sa maganda nating pagsasama, Leo... It was my fault... Your accident... Everything!" Her voice sounded like it quivered a bit in the end.

Then she returned her eyes to me. Nakatingin lang din ako sa kaniya. "Leo, inaamin ko na nagkamali ako... And... and your also right that I lied to you... when I was still trying to see him back then... And we were already married..." She said it herself.

Ako naman ang nag-iwas sa kaniya ng tingin. I already know it, but it still hurts me to think that she really did cheat on me with another man. With her ex-boyfriend. That she probably loved dearly...

It made me doubt her feelings for me more. I feel like she was really only there with me because it was convenient... Because we seemed almost perfect. Our relationship felt great. But now I can't help but to think if she has doubts in us, too...

Kasi baka iyong ex naman talaga niya ang totoong mahal pa rin niya hanggang ngayon...

So it's not just about her betrayal to me. It's not just about whether I can or cannot forgive her for what she did. Because it's also about her... and her feelings...

I didn't want to stay somewhere that doesn't feel real anymore...

Ang dami ko nang duda. I already felt insecure. At parang nawalan na rin ako ng tiwala sa amin. Kaya sobrang hirap talaga...

Tumayo siya muli sa pagkakaupo niya lang kanina sa bar stool ng kitchen counter at hinarap niya pa ako lalo. Now she looked at me again with her begging eyes. "But, Leo, I have already long realized that it was wrong... What we had, already ended a long time ago. At nang panahon na 'yon na nakita mo kaming dalawa sa hotel... I was only there to tell him that I wanted whatever was still between us to end already..."

My lips just parted a bit.

"I swear, Leo. Talagang tinapos ko na ang namagitan sa amin noon pa man."

"And was it also because you knew that I was already having my doubts in you..." I said.

She was looking at me and her eyes widened a fraction. She shook he head before she spoke again. "Oo, naramdaman ko na rin noon iyon... But it's not just that, Leo. Talagang naka-realized na ako nang panahon na 'yon na ikaw talaga ang mahal ko—"

"Saang mga lugar kayo nagkikita noon nang hindi ko nalalaman, kung ganoon?"

Her lips parted at my question, at hindi siya nakasagot agad. She shook her head once more. And then she looked up at me again. "We only met a few times... And it was just over a meal, Leo... Pagkatapos ay umuuwi na ako agad noon sa bahay natin..."

Nakatingin kaming dalawa sa isa't isa.

"What else did you do aside from having meals together?" I almost sarcastically asked her.

She was looking at me with guilty and scared eyes. Umiling siya. "Leo..."

Umigting naman ang panga ko. "Answer me." I asked in a commanding tone that I never did before to her.

Umawang lang ang labi niya pagkatapos ay nakayuko siyang nagsabi... "We only kissed a few times... Pero iyon lang, Leo!" Tumingin muli siya sa mga mata ko.

At tiningnan ko lang din siya. And my wild imagination about her and that man were like sending all the evil thoughts in my head. I feel like I wanted revenge, or I want them to hurt and suffer the same way they made me feel...

So I just shook my head again and I probably looked disappointed before I just turned my back on her. May isang kasambahay na kakapasok lang din sa kitchen. At nakita ko ang panlalaki ng mga mata niya habang nakatingin siya sa likuran ko.

"Ma'am Yessa!" She shouted.

Kaya agad din akong napalingon ulit sa kung nasaan lang nakatayo pa si Yessa kanina. Pero ngayon ay halos nakahandusay na lang siya roon sa sahig ng kitchen at wala nang malay...

Parang nanigas ako sa kinatatayuan ko at nanlamig ang buo kong katawan sa nakitang nakahigang wala nang malay doon si Yessa.

Author's Note: Hi! The free to read chapters end here. This story was Completed in Patreon and Facebook VIP group. You can download the Patreon app and pledge $3 to read my exclusive stories there. To join VIP, kindly message me on my Facebook accounts Rej Martinez or Rej Martinez's Stories page. Thank you so much for your support! Happy reading!