Episode 9: Wounds Of A Father

Strange Supreme stepped through the portal and back into the "Overlook Dimension" of The Watcher, delivering his report.

"I've just informed Omni Man that him and the other Guardians may be called upon soon," Strange Supreme informed the Watcher. "He was second to last on my list. I'll notify Arima right away."

The Watcher glumly shook his head, and Strange was confused.

"Look," the Watcher said simply, pointing at the window into Kousei's new universe.

...................................

"Son?" Takahiko Arima said, holding out his arms for a hug. "Aren't you happy to see me?"

Kousei just breathed in and out as slowly as he could, resisting the urge to storm out of the house and slam the door in his father's face. Every instinct screamed at Kousei to do as such. But instead, the pianist just stood in the living room, back rigid and hands shaking angrily.

Happy? That was quite a far cry from the word Kousei would use to describe the emotions he felt when looking upon the man who had sacrificed time with his terminally ill wife and abused son on the altar of corporate success. Kousei recalled his father had only briefly been in town when his mother passed away in his old universe, but that was it.

Then it struck him.

"Did you even go to my funeral, dad?"

Takahiko stopped in his tracks.

"Son...?"

"The funeral. Of my other self in this universe who died," Kousei reiterated. "Were you even there? At all?"

Takahiko was caught off guard; his first time seeing his son—well, his son's alternate that is—three months after the other Kousei's passing, and this was the first question on his son's mind?

"Why—yes, my son!" Takahiko stammered. "I was so devastated to be there! Losing your mother, and then you...I felt I had nothing more to do except work! When Hiroko called me and told me of how you'd come into this world, I was speechless! I had to come see you myself!"

"You realize I've been here for a month already, right dad?"

Takahiko stopped short, searching for the right words. The reply the absent father uttered in his defense, however, was less than ideal.

"Well, yes son, but I had a business summit in the United States! You know how those are, how long they go! I—!"

"DON'T!" Kousei suddenly shouted, his patience having run out. Takahiko took a step back.

"Just don't!" Kousei yelled. "After all the times you weren't there for mom while she withered away in that cruel hospital bed, you're crazy if you think I'll accept your feeble excuses for a second!"

Takahiko's mouth was agape with surprise, anger, and regret. His son had never talked to him like this before!

Then Arima's father realized...if Kousei had wanted to say these things to him, he'd never been around to hear it.

"Where were you, when mom lay dying in that hospital, hooked up to all those machines?!" Kousei snarled.

Takahiko was silent.

"Where were you, when the girl I loved was taken from me by an incurable condition that turned her into a walking pile of fragile, degenerated muscles?!"

"Where were you, when I felt worthless, weak, and scared to face the world after mom died?!"

Kousei's eyes were fiery red as the tears of unreceived love streamed down his face.

"Where were you...WHEN MOM WOULDN'T STOP HITTING MEEEEEE?!"

Kousei almost lost his voice from that last holler, but he didn't care. He looked his father full in the face, his heavy breathing, flowing tears, and clenched fists saying all the words he hadn't said. Kousei wanted to add more, but his throat was so tight and his vocal cords swollen from yelling that he simply couldn't. Kousei wasn't sure if it was because he was too scared to tell his father how he really felt, or if he was strong enough not to.

It made little difference because Takahiko had received the message clear as day. At first, Kousei's father simply stood there, frozen by shock. Then, a look of anger filled Takahiko's face and he pointed at his son.

"Now you look here, young man!" Takahiko said sternly, hoping in vain to take control of the situation. "I am not one to tolerate disrespect in my house! You watch your tone with me!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, did you forget who decided that his stupid business trip was more important than coming to the only competition of mine where mom saw me play?!" Kousei shot back. "And now after barely being around, you think you have the right to give me orders?!"

"How dare you!" Takahiko snapped back. "You take back your words this instant, son!"

Kousei's eyes remained locked with his father's, in blatant defiance.

"Make me."

Takahiko and Kousei exchanged yet another tense glance. Arima's father felt the slightest chill run up his spine...was this what his son was really insinuating?

For him to physically make him apologize for what he'd just said?

"That does it!" Takahiko yelled, breaking the silence. "I'm off to Sapporo to stay the night with a friend of mine! You're on your own!"

"No surprise there!" Kousei shouted back, stomping upstairs to his room.

"Kousei!" his father barked. "You get back here this instant!"

But Kousei refused, storming into his room, slamming the door shut, locking it, then falling to the floor again as another storm of angry tears flowed down his face. His blue suit and tie was drenched in sweat by now, and his straight black hair had devolved into a wild frizzle. Kousei tore off his shoes and socks, throwing them against the wall with all his might. His breathing was ragged and his entire body was overcome by the surfaced bitterness.

Kousei moved towards his bed, but to no avail as the stress on his body caused his arms to fail. He fell to the floor, covering his eyes with his hands and wiping away more tears.

He didn't even change into his PJs.

He didn't even take his glasses off.

Instead, Kousei just cried.

And cried.

And cried.

Until at last, his body succumbed to the force of sleep which would either refresh him and cause him to wake up more relaxed...

Or curse him with a nightmare of his father's neglect and rekindle his bitterness for the next morning.

........................................

As Watari rounded the corner towards Tsubaki's house the next morning, he suddenly felt his legs growing weak and his steps faltering without explanation.

"Come on, you've walked this route a hundred times!" Watari scolded himself. "You're just bringing Tsubaki a gift and telling her that she sounded great onstage! Nothing to worry about!"

And yet, as the formerly cocky soccer captain told himself that, he felt much more reserved now than at any other time he had approached a girl in class. Watari clenched his hands and cursed himself. He'd effortlessly obtained phone numbers, social media handles, and more from several girls at school. He'd never had any issue with wooing them, buying them perfect gifts, and making them desperately want to spend even just one minute with him.

So why did this feel so different?

"Dang it, Kousei!" Watari thought with envy. "Is this what it was like when you first laid eyes on Kaori?!"

Then, Watari remembered he hadn't texted Tsubaki he was coming over, and was relieved to find a valid excuse to not follow through. She'd most likely just call him creepy for not notifying her first right? Plus, she most likely wasn't even a big fan of snacks unless it was some sort of protein bar to help her recover from all that softball practice. Munching on the strawberry-flavored candy himself, Watari turned around and began heading home. 

He scrolled through his social media feed as he walked, robotically putting likes on the posts of Kaori, Tsubaki, and a few others. Then, he saw a certain notification come up on his phone, and he was startled. He clutched his phone to his chest, looking around with a mild look of guilt on his face. Upon seeing no one around, Watari breathed a sigh of relief and glanced at his phone screen again to make sure he'd seen right.

That's when a mischievous smile spread across his face.

"Any video on that site with her in it will definitely be good," Watari thought. Stuffing his phone back in his pocket, he quickened his pace so he could get home faster.

Meanwhile, in Tsubaki's house, Tsubaki expressed concern to her mother about the yelling she'd heard in Kousei's residence last night after the performance. She also informed her mother of how Arima had had quite a few inexplicable temper flares at her and Kaori during their rehearsals, and Mrs. Sawabe listened thoughtfully.

"I know it's not best for me to talk to him, as I don't want to be the reason rumors about him and Kaori start up," Tsubaki added on. "But do you think it'd be okay if both of us went to check on him?"

"Maybe I can go check on him by myself after breakfast, dear," Yua smiled. "But it is good that you're mindful of your friend. I'll go knock on his door after we eat, okay?"

"Okay, mom," Tsubaki smiled. "Thank you."

Inside his room, Kousei was doing his best to feign interest in a Facetime call he was having with Kaori. It was nine in the morning already, so he'd gotten plenty of sleep, sure. But even then, he couldn't help but feel that Kaori had called at a somewhat uncomfortable time. Nevertheless, he made an effort to return her affectionate words.

"You look like a mess, Promoted Friend A!" Kaori giggled. "You didn't even fully change out of your concert clothes!"

"I know, I know," Kousei sighed. "I'll wash them later, okay?"

"You fell asleep on the floor, didn't you?" Kaori observed.

"I guess the performance just took a lot out of me," Kousei shrugged, not wanting to tell Kaori about the heated tiff with his father. However, Kaori could still sense something was off.

"Are you sure you're okay, Kousei?" Kaori asked. "You've been kinda weird lately."

"Aren't I always?" Kousei replied nonchalantly.

"Kaori!" her mother called from off-screen. "Come downstairs and finish these breakfast dishes please!"

"Coming mom!" Kaori replied, then turned her face back to the camera.

"I gotta go, but how about we meet at the park by Towa Hall later at 3 o'clock, huh?" Kaori grinned.

"Sure," Kousei said flatly, but with at least a small smile on his face. He waited a few seconds, then was puzzled when Kaori didn't hang up.

"No, you hang up first!" she teased.

Kousei sighed again. "Kaori, seriously?"

"Well, I don't want to hang up first!"

Kousei hit the red phone symbol on the bottom of his screen, then was immediately bombarded with messages from Kaori where she deemed him a soulless monster for hanging up first. It got a small giggle out of Kousei at least, and at last, he got to his feet and dusted himself off. Kaori had a point; his performance attire didn't exactly make the best PJs.

Changing out of his suit—making sure to put it in the dirty laundry bin once it was off—Kousei donned a simple pair of yellow shorts, blue sandals, and a red shirt t-shirt with New York City as its background. Making his way downstairs, he entered the kitchen and was grateful to still see there were some eggs, milk, and cereal left. Preparing himself two sunny-side-up eggs and pouring a bowl of cereal, Kousei sat down and enjoyed his simple breakfast. He checked his phone: he still had six hours left before his meeting with Kaori. What was he to do?

Just then, Kousei heard a knock at the door, and was taken by surprise. Wasn't Hiroko not supposed to be back until tomorrow? Going to the door, he peered through the peephole and was further surprised to see Tsubaki's mother on the porch. What was she doing here this early in the morning?

"Mrs. Sawabe!" Kousei greeted after he opened the door. He bowed slightly. "Good morning to you!"

"Good morning, Arima," Yua replied with a warm smile. "How are you this morning?"

"I'm good, ma'am," Kousei smiled back. "Is something wrong?"

"Oh no, everything is alright next door," Yua assured him. "I was just coming to check on you. It seemed there was quite a racket here last night. Are you alright?"

Kousei visibly stiffened up. While grateful for Mrs. Sawabe's concern, he didn't exactly consider just how loud he'd been yelling last night. He normally was appreciative when his friends or neighbors checked on him. So why did this make him feel so tense all of a sudden?

"I'm okay," Kousei said quickly, deflecting any further questions. "Thanks for checking on me though."

Yua was dubious of the fourteen-year-old's defensive claims, but she knew better than to press the matter further.

"Of course, Arima," she said, extending the Tupperware of leftover miso to the pianist. "Do you need a snack?"

"No thank you!" Kousei said curtly. "I'll see you later! Thanks though!"

Yua was somewhat startled as Kousei shut the door, but just shook her head in disappointment. She could see Kousei was acting the same way Tsubaki had acted when she'd bottled something up. But at the end of the day, she was not the boy's mother, and could only pray he'd eventually be honest as she walked back to her house.

Inside, Kousei took deep breaths in and out to calm himself down. What on earth had come over him the past few hours?! It's not like Kaori was hounding him to be her accompanist at the last second again!

That early memory from when he'd first met her soothed Kousei's emerging bitterness, and the pianist's body released some of the tension that had overwhelmed it at Mrs. Sawabe's inquiry. Kousei returned to the dining room, loaded his dishes, then went back upstairs to take care of some homework. Academics had never been an issue for him, so he completed his assignments with relative ease. Upon setting the pencil down, Kousei suddenly brightened up. Of course, why didn't he think of it before?!

"I haven't even looked for a piece Kaori and I can play for our next duet!"

Entering the piano room, Kousei began thumbing through the vast collection of Baroque, Classical, and Romantic era music on the dusty shelves. He took note of Love's Joy and Love's Sorrow, bypassing them. He had to find something that would give Kaori the wild freedom she always sought to play with during a performance.

That was when Kousei found a piece he hadn't played in a long time. Taking it off the shelf, he dusted it off and gazed at it with nostalgic admiration.

Yes, this piece would do nicely.

....................................

Kaori sat on the bench in the park, humming merrily to herself as she kicked her sandaled feet, the sandals being the same pair she'd bought when she and Kousei had gone to the mall. Having completed her Saturday chores and homework, she'd changed from her morning outfit into blue jeans and a blue t-shirt that boasted a picture of the Milky Way galaxy. Her hair was down, somewhat frizzled, but Kaori didn't really care much for that. Several kids ran around the park playing tag, drawing with chalk, or crying to their parents for another snack. Though she'd been tempted to, Kaori had refrained from bringing her violin or melodica. This time around, the violinist just wanted to enjoy a tranquil day in the park. She'd even bought some egg sandwiches (making sure to get Kousei's favorite brand) and some of her father's canelés!

"A nice little picnic, just me and him!" she thought with a cheerful disposition.

Then she checked her watch...it was 2:55 already! Where was that bonehead, blast it! However, as Kaori looked around, she glimpsed Kousei's skinny form off in the distance, running toward her with what looked like to be some sheet music. Kaori's face lit up as she raced to her boyfriend and gave him a big hug.

"I almost thought you'd bailed on me!" Kaori joked, brushing at his fuzzy black hair.

"You'd never let me hear the end of it if I did!" Kousei chuckled.

But something wasn't right...for some reason, Kaori couldn't help but feel Kousei's laugh was the fake, nervous kind. She wanted to ask him about it but figured it best to leave it alone for now.

"He'll probably feel better after we enjoy our snacks for a bit." She thought dismissively.

"You should've left your shoes and leggings in a tree as a trail for me to follow," Kousei joked.

Kaori gently shoved him. "Oh shut up about that already."

Returning to the bench, Kaori and Kousei began to laugh and talk casually as they munched on their sandwiches and canelés. After a while, Kousei presented Kaori with the score he thought would be a good choice for their next duet. Much to Kousei's delight, Kaori wholeheartedly agreed!

"Cesar Franck's Sonata For Piano and Violin in A?!" Kaori gasped. "The fourth movement?!"

"Yup!" Kousei grinned.

"Wow! I've always wanted to play this piece!" Kaori said wistfully, leaning her head on Kousei's shoulder.

"So when's the next violin competition? Kousei inquired. "Will it be one where I'll be allowed to accompany you?"

"Next month, in June," Kaori informed him. "A bit sudden, I know, but I'm sure we can pull it off! Yes, we have the option for an accompanist. Plus, we'll both need to keep our competition record up if we want to have a good shot at getting into a good music school. Do you think Hiroko or your dad could come to watch us play?"

"Why is everyone mentioning my dad today of all days?!" Kousei fumed, though his body again suddenly went stiff. He quickly changed the subject.

"Speaking of...I'm actually not quite sure what I want to do in regard to a music school," Kousei replied. "I know my, well, other self wanted to go to Europe, but, well..."

"Yeah?"

"I'd be going away from you," Kousei said, smiling at his beloved violinist.

Kaori felt her heart grow warm, and poked Kousei's side.

"So that's why you were being all mopey and boring earlier!"

"Heh heh...yeah!" Kousei laughed, relieved to have a cover at last.

"In all seriousness though, try applying for a couple of stateside schools I've applied to!" Kaori suggested. "There's Musahi High School which has an awesome music school prep track, and also Fujimi Junior and Senior High! That one, in particular, has a good program for pianists wanting to go abroad for college!"

"Awesome!" Kousei answered. "Is that the one you want to go to?"

Kaori gave him a sly smile. "You're a clingy one aren't you?"

"Hey, I lost you and everyone else back in my old timeline so excuse me if I'm a little worried about being away from you okay?!" Kousei suddenly snapped.

"Kousei, calm down!" Kaori said, taken aback. "I was just kidding!"

Kousei looked away, his head hanging down. Kaori remembered when she'd always seen him looking down...it was never a good sign. This was the third time today he'd responded out of the ordinary to a casual joke or mention of a certain thing. Rather than shout back, Kaori put a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, it's okay," she said, consoling her boyfriend. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"No, it's fine," Kousei muttered softly. "I'm sorry I yelled at you like that."

Kaori decided to pluck up courage.

"Kousei...what's going on? Something else is bothering you. Something more than just music. What is it, Arima? Please. Tell me."

Kousei sighed, and told Kaori what was really going on. Everything, from the way seeing his father after months of him being absent made him feel, to all the hurtful words he and his father had hurled at one another. Kaori listened empathetically, broken-hearted; she didn't want Kousei to feel unheard, and stayed her hand on his shoulder as his tears started to fall.

"Kousei, why didn't you just tell me this morning?" Kaori asked kindly. "I would've listened. I don't see why you felt the need to hide it from me."

That was when something buried really deep inside Kousei came to the surface.

Something spiteful...

Something insidious...

Something vile.

"YOU LIED TO ME BOTH HERE AND IN MY OLD TIMELINE, SO YOU TELL ME!!!"

.................................

Kousei couldn't stop crying as the bitter tears of self-loathing and rage streamed down his face, into his palms, and onto his t-shirt. He'd been trying to forget about the whole thing for the past hour and a half now, playing various etudes and preludes in his practice room at home. But every time he'd start to play, Kaori's horrified look of shock, sadness, and hurt—deep, genuine, crippling hurt—would enter his mind. Along with the words she'd said as she stomped back home.

"Find someone else to perform that piece with, Kousei. Because it is not going to be me."

Again, Kousei couldn't stop crying. The piano keys were slick with sweat and tears, and he couldn't even do an ascending C-Major scale without botching it.

"How could I be such a fool?!" he cursed himself. "Why did I have to let those words slip out of my mouth?! I'd already told her I didn't care about that...so why?!"

To make matters worse, he heard the familiar sound of Hiroko's car pulling into the driveway, and readied himself for her inevitable scolding. One way or another, she'd probably already found out by now.

"Scolding" was an understatement. Hiroko's shoes thumped furiously on the stairs as she sent Koharu to her room. She may not have been Kousei's mother by blood, but she was beyond livid at what she'd heard from Kaori's father during their phone call.

"He told me everything, Kousei!" Hiroko shouted as Kousei just stared at the floor of the practice room. "About how you kept telling Kaori everything was fine, giving her no indication to think otherwise! About how you've been suddenly flaring up at her over trivial things for the past month! About how you suddenly brought up petty stuff from the past that you yourself told her didn't matter to you anymore!"

Kousei just sat there and listened, not even bothering to defend himself.

"Kaori has been crying for the past hour and a half!" Hiroko added. "You are aware of that, right?! What the hell has gotten into you, Kousei?!"

At first, Kousei had no answer. Then, at last, he raised his head, and the look of utter tormented defeat on his face made Hiroko stop short. Kousei's eyes were drained of any joy he may have felt earlier that day, and his glasses were filthy from all the dust.

"I don't know, okay?!" he wailed desperately. "I've had to see that old photo of our family in the room with mom's altar every day! Back when he would help mom around the house...back when he would come to watch me perform!"

Hiroko's shoulders sank, along with her expression. So that's what had been grinding the boy's gears for a while now.

"I hadn't seen him in months both in my old universe, and in here!" Kousei sniffed. "He didn't even come back right away when I literally came to replace my dead self, Hiroko! And when he got here last night he acted like nothing had ever happened!"

Again, Hiroko had no words. After all, Kousei wasn't wrong.

"I didn't want to push these things onto Tsubaki and Kaori and ruin our rehearsals! But when Kaori asked me why I didn't tell her, something just snapped, and now...now...!"

Hiroko sighed. "Kousei...I understand your frustration with your dad, and I can talk to him about it as well. But what you've done is not okay! At all! You took out your anger on the girl who adores you, who means everything to you! And when she asks you an honest question about why you hid it, you tell her something equally spiteful! What kind of person—!"

"SHUT UP!" Kousei hollered suddenly, slamming some of the piano keys and burying his face in his hands. Hiroko stepped back; Kousei had never spoken to her that way before!

"You don't think I realize that?!" Kousei shouted again, his sobs obscuring some of his words. "What do you think I've been doing until you got here?! Congratulating myself?! Finding another girl to chase after?! I know what I've done, Hiroko! But how am I supposed to take it back?!"

"Well, how did Tsubaki make amends for her drama?" Hiroko shouted back. "You need to do the same, and quick, because you are not going to be treating anyone this way as long as you're under my roof!"

Kousei was silent, then gazed at Hiroko with a piercing gaze full of resentment and sadness.

"Oh lay off already, would you?" he snarled. "You didn't even try to intercept my mom's cane when she struck me at the concert! You're not even my real mother so stop acting like it!"

Silence.

Hiroko wanted to scream at the boy, make him sit down at the piano for six hours until he realized just how far he'd crossed over the line.

But then, she recalled Saki's treatment of Arima whenever he committed the slightest musical heresy, and instead just slowly turned and walked out of the practice room.

"You need help, Kousei," she said simply. "A lot of help."

...........................................

Later that evening, on the bridge Kousei had crossed countless times on his way home from school—where he and Kaori had seen fireflies together—Kousei stood silently, hands resting on the railing and eyes gazing into the moonlight pensively. He'd already apologized to Hiroko and helped her prepare dinner. But he still wrestled with the dilemma in his mind of how he would convey sincere contrition to Kaori.

Was it even possible to restore what he'd just lost?

Kousei shoved that thought out of his mind. No, he would not let it end this way. He had not survived the complete annihilation of his old world and brought peace to another timeline only to lose the girl he loved so quickly. He would find a way.

Still though, the young prodigy was in sore need of guidance.

Just then, Kousei heard the rumbling of a vehicle to his left, and turned to see a motorcycle with police markings slow to a stop on the left side of the bridge. The lone police officer removed his helmet, revealing short trimmed black hair, brown eyes, and a slightly pointed chin. Stepping off the motorized transport, the tall police officer slowly approached Kousei with a worried look on his face.

"Sir?" the officer said, moving his hands in an odd yet controlled manner. "Are you doing okay tonight?"

Kousei was puzzled. "Um, yes...why are you moving your hands like that?"

The officer facepalmed.

"Agh! Sorry, force of habit," the officer apologized. "My wife is deaf, so I'm always communicating with her in sign language."

"Oh, I see," Kousei nodded. "Thank you for checking on me sir, but I'm fine. I appreciate the gesture though, officer...?"

The officer smiled warmly, indicating to his name tape over the left breast pocket of his uniform.

"I'm officer Shouya Ishida," Officer Ishida introduced himself. "What's your name?"