I looked into Taehyung's eyes, he was hurt, but that expression soon turned blank as he grabbed my wrist and pulled me out of the room and into the empty corridor. He dragged me all the way to the rooftop where he stopped and looked at me, "I want you to scream, as loud as you can." He commanded.

"Why? What's screaming going to change? I scream in silence all the time and what did that do for me? Nothing but endless suffocation, so why Kim Taehyung, why do you want me to scream? Do you seriously think that'll help?" I looked at him numbly, he aggressively grabbed my shoulders and stared straight into my eyes.

"GOD JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP JACKSON. Seeing you like that, how do you think it made me feel? How do you think it feels to realise that you haven't achieved happiness, rather you've just faked it because you don't even see me as someone you could talk to about what goes on in your head. That shit was eating you up for god knows how long, that's why it suffocated you, and rightfully so. Screams are exerting your pain, transforming it into a heartbreaking sound as it releases. Holding it in doesn't let out the pain, it piles it up into one big volcano waiting to erupt, and today yours did."

He released a breath after speaking all of that, letting go of my shoulders as he massaged the temples of his forehead, it's like I felt the clenching of his heart. "I didn't want to burden any of you, my problems are my problems. There's no need to make everyone suffer along with me when I can handle with them myself-"

"HANDLE? Is that what you call handling because it looks a whole lot more like struggle. A pathetic struggle, a cry for a fucking saviour to come save you from your own mind. You kill yourself every day that you choose to keep in what you feel. Why do you think you're so strong? Why do you act like you don't need someone to comfort you when things get hard? News flash princess, you do, so drop the act of being strong, take the mask off when you talk to me for fucks sake. You told me I taught you how to live again, was that a lie?" He spat out, his tone drowning me in guilt.

"Of course not, I meant every word of it. For an entire year I just existed, like every other lost soul, only now do I feel alive. I'm living. But my past is, regretful, it haunts me to know how different things could've been if people didn't put my life before theirs. I don't deserve it Tae, I'm not worth it. People shouldn't have to die because of me. And in the future, we both know what they're going to do-"

"The past is the past, everyone has things they regret, and things they would kill to change, but everything happens for a reason, especially the death of Seojun, he saw something in that future, that required you to be alive. So live it, live your life, not for him, not for anyone, live for yourself." He poked his finger at the centre of my chest.

"You have a purpose Jackson, you may not know what it is, but you have one, and that should be enough. Because you're living, so many people aren't, so many people don't know their purpose, and living without a purpose, is just existing." He cut me off.

"You cannot change the past, and you can't know what the future holds. You are free of both those things, so choose yourself, choose joy. All we have is now. Why cling onto what you can't control so desperately? They sacrificed their lives for you, they didn't give it up for you to live yours like this." He continued, releasing a breath as he finished his words.

"I can't stand you," he spat, rolling his eyes before he looked at me.

"I really fucking hate you." He yanked my wrist, suddenly pulling me towards him making me land perfectly into his arms. "Your actions say otherwise," I tried to fix my stance and move away but his grip around my body grew tighter as he relaxed his chin on the top of my head. "Don't you dare resist, I can't be asked to repeat that inspiring speech all over again. Let's just stay like this. Please." His tone pleaded me even if his words were simple sounding.

What a melodrama, you even made me grab popcorn. Feel that embrace, listen to the beating of his heart, and watch how I'll make sure that same heart will never beat again. He'll end up dead because of you, you're seeing why you're going to have to join me right?

"Oh shut up, let me be in peace for a bit would you, nosy motherfucker..." I muttered, "hmm?" Taehyung hummed in question of my words.

"There's a man in my head, he keeps telling me people are going to die because of me," I told him, "shut him out," "How." I asked as he pulled out of the hug. "Overpower his evil with something stronger," he told me. "Like?" I asked with no hope, he put his hand and placed it on my cheek, caressing my cheeks with his thumb, it was something he did often, something he knew I weirdly liked.

"It's something you won't like, it's something you can kill me over, but please don't hit me, I'm only trying to help ok?" He said to me, "wait what do you mean? What's stronger than evil?" I asked, furrowing my eyebrows. "Love."

"But we don't love each other-"

He pressed his lips on mine, and I wanted to push him away. I really did, this was the second time in one day he was kissing me without permission, but I couldn't. Something about the way his lips felt against mine that made me wish it would last forever. I hesitantly replied to the kiss, gently moving my lips on his.

Seojun's soul must be appalled watching this, oh right, my people destroyed it-

His chuckle was cut off as my mind filled with only Taehyung, only on the current moment. I had shut him out, he was gone, he couldn't get inside my head if his evil was weaker than love. And evil, is always weaker than love.

He deepened the kiss as he cupped my cheeks with his hands, wiping the dry tears away. Our lips moved in sync, I could just let go and tell him that we had accomplished the goal of shutting that man out but I didn't want to. His lips were so soft, they tasted like cherries, such a sweet yet passionate way of kissing-

"He's g-gone," I quickly pushed Taehyung away and parted from the kiss, both of us a little out of breath. I realised what I was doing, feeling guilty for liking it as much as I did even though I shouldn't. Tae's index finger ran along his lip as he attempted to hide a smile, "love always wins," he told me, trying to act cool while he put his hands in his pocket.

"So should we get to that screaming therapy I was talking about?" He quickly changed the topic, turning me around to face the view of the sundown. "Scream what you wish," he whispered. "I wish I forced my godfather to spend time with me, so I could at least have some memories to remember." I spoke out, "oh come on, you gotta scream," he said.

"Like this, AAAAAAAAAAAA-"

-slap- He screamed so loudly in my ear that my first instinct was to wack him on the cheek with my hand. "I get it," I told him, patting him on the shoulder as he was still processing the random slap he had just received, in my defence it was practically a tap, I did it that lightly. I turned back to face the balcony, and inhaled a deep breath.

"I WISH I COULD BE HAPPY WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY!" I yelled on the top of my lungs, my eyebrows slightly raising at how good it felt.

"I WISH I WAS NORMAL SO I DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT PEOPLE AROUND ME DYING!" Taehyung had taken a step back, letting me have my space.

"I WISH SEOJUN AND RUNER WERE STILL ALIVE. I WISH MY MUM WAS MORE LOVING. I WISH I COULD STOP OVERTHINKING. I WISH THINGS WOULD GET BETTER INSTEAD OF MAKING ME NUMB TO THEM."

"I WISH I HAD DIED INSTEAD OF HIM."

I screamed as loud as I could, exerting all the energy I had, releasing a painful scream as I fell onto my knees. "You alright?" Taehyung squatted next to me, tilting his head.

"Yeah that- that felt good," I nodded, releasing a sigh. "I think the velescence wore off, I feel normal," I said, as Tae agreed, "you know all that potion does it reveal truth to everything right? Just promise me this. You'll tell me whenever something bothers you ok? If not me then Nova, if not Nova then Isaac, if not Isaac then I'll take you to earth and you can talk to that teacher you love. Just please never hold that stuff in again ok?" He told me, making me nod, "I will, I promise."

"So about uh, the whole make out session we just had-" I cut Taehyung's words off by quickly standing up and attempting to walk away, "it was nothing." I said quickly, "that's what I was going to say? I was helping you shut whoever was in your head out, so let's not make things awkward, just pretend like it never happened." He spoke making me turn around to face him, "YES, that's perfect, it never happened."

I walked away touching my lips, reminiscing the moment.

There was no forgetting it.