September 1, 1982

Dear  Wormtail and Prongs,

sometimes it's easier to get into deep trouble than it is not too. The difference this time is that I don't have any of you to have my back. You should have seen the face my father gave me when I entered the house in the condition I was in. 

I don't think he will let me out again. 

Truth is, I'm looking for that trouble. 

It's an excuse to feel any other pain than the one I have been feeling for so long. It feels like its been an eternity. 

When my mother saw me, I swear I could see all the pain and pity in her eyes. She lays in her bed, sick. 

Remember all those excuses about my mother being sick being the only reason why you guys left my condition alone for the first years we knew each other. 

I wish it was just an excuse this time. 

My mother is dying, and seeing the life from her eyes slowly slip away adds so much more to this grief. 

I don't want her to go. 

She and dad are the only thing that keeps me on the ground. 

Don't take her... 

not yet. 

your brother, Remus Lupin