Friday Evening

Admittedly, Bruce had NO clue what he was doing. 

Sure Alfred was a great help, but the butler was getting on years and couldn't exactly keep up with a new baby at this point. 

Even that wasn't too bad, but since he'd returned to the mountain, and picked his foster son up, he hadn't been able to put the child down again. Well, he could put Dick down, but only for a couple minutes at a time. And if he tried to leave the room, even for a minute, Dick would start crying.

Turns out, it's very hard to keep a baby from crying. and it's rather difficult to take care of them in general.

Bruce had a small bag of remaining supplies from Dick's time at the mountain, but he knew that was definitely not enough, so he had Alfred draw up a list of what a one-year old child might need.

But that brings up another problem, Bruce Wayne couldn't exactly walk through Gotham with an infant on his hip like it was no big deal. Besides which, they didn't have a car seat. Plus he obviously couldn't leave Dick alone either. But he didn't want Alfred too far out of reach for more than thirty minutes or so while Bruce was alone with Dick. 

Bruce had to think of someone who knew he and Dick's identities, was strong enough to carry a few heavy shopping bags, and wouldn't arouse too much suspicion from buying baby stuff.

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"HEY!" Barbara called. Dragging the shopping bags through the door Alfred held open for her. "I  got the stuff you wanted." 

"Thank you. Just in here." Bruce called.

She followed through to the kitchen as directed. "I don't know why you wanted all this baby stuff, but the cashier kept looking at be weird, and I had to make up this lie about my little cousin's room setting on fire and..."

She froze in the doorway of the kitchen, staring in disbelief. Bruce nodded, leaning on the counter with one arm, holding the baby against his chest with the other. "You can just leave the bags by the kitchen island."

She blinked, cocking her head a little like a confused puppy. "Whoa. Uh... what'cha got there?" She dragged the bags to the island as requested, and stood, staring at the infant in his arms. Who stared back. "Where'd that come from. and where's Dick?"

Bruce stood up straight and adjusted his grip on the boy. "Here."

"....Come again?"

"Something happened with Dick's team..." Bruce replied, pacing back and forth, bouncing the infant in his arms a little. The child turned his head to watch Barbara with his blue eyes. She must look very interesting.

"Daddy!" He exclaimed, pointing his arm in her direction.

"I know, Dickie. I'm still here" Bruce assured him. Dick turned around to face his father and was almost just as excited to see him again. Object permanence and all that.

"And he's a baby?" She ordered, eyebrows raised high enough to break the stratosphere.

"Essentially." Bruce replied, going to help Alfred put everything away, but finding it difficult with a child in one arm. 

"Need some help?" 

"No, he just usually cries when I don't hold him."

"Do you... need me to do anything?" The readhead offered.

Bruce turned around to her. "Can you hold him for a moment."

Barbara found herself with an infant shoved into her arms. "Oh!" She looked down at him, worried the baby might burst into tears. "Hi, Dick?" He did not cry. He gave a ghost of a smile and turned to stare at Bruce, now finding him the most interesting thing in the room.
"Wow, so how young are he others?"

"About three-to-five. Dick's the youngest by a couple years." Bruce told her, now working a lot more efficiently. "They were staying at Mt. Justice, But we're taking them home for a few days while we put together a safer place for them to stay."

Barbara nodded, staring at the child in her hands. "Six toddlers playing in Justice League territory. Yeah, I can see how that'd be dangerous." She lowered herself to the kitchen floor and shook off her shoulder bag. "So do the parents have anything to say on this?"

"We've decided not to release details the team's parents, they're staying with their mentors at the moment. Except for Suberboy and Ms. Martian, who don't have homes outside of the mountain." 

"So you just... Aren't telling the parents anything?" Barbra set Dick on the floor in front of her and let him sit up on his own. "Aren't they going to get... I don't know, Worried that their kids are just gone?"

"Their parents know that they're on the team, so we've just let them know that they're needed at the mountain for a few days longer for their safety." Bruce told her. Barbara always assumed that young superheroes would not let their parents know, but she was pretty much the only one.

"Wild. And I guess it's summer break, so they don't have school..."

"Exactly." Bruce sorted through the bottom of a plastic grocery bag. "You're doing a great job with Dick, by the way." He observed, watching Barbara, who was sitting cross-legged on the floor, across from the baby. "So far, I haven't seen any adults entertain him nearly that well."

"I babysit these kids in my apartment complex sometimes." The redhead reported, drumming her hands on the kitchen floor, encouraging Dick to do the same.

"Really?" Bruce closed a cabinet after organizing it with their new supplies. "I never knew that."

"Yep, I'm pretty good too." She reported, continuing to hype the child up. "and I don't mean to brag, but the ten year old drew me a picture of their Golden Retriever, so..." She hit both her palms on the floor, smiling a little as Dick mimicked her actions with enthusiasm. 

Bruce stood up. "How about you help Alfred watch him while I'm patrol tonight."

She looked at him over her shoulder. "Do I take this to mean you don't want Batgirl out tonight?"

"One of my partners was turned into an infant, I don't want to risk my other at the moment."

"Well that is so not fair, is it, Dick?" She replied in a cheery voice, leaning forward to Dick's height. Not quite sure what she was saying, Dick clapped his hands with excitement.

Bruce smirked at her. "But first, do you have something for me?"

"Hmm?" Barbara looked up from playing with the infant. "You mean this?"

"No."

"OH-" She shifted her weight and pulled a card from her jeans pocket. "Thanks, I don't need it now dad's back at work." She passed it up. "I should've kept it. College fund."

"Thank you." Bruce smiled, taking out his wallet and sliding the card in one of the less-used pockets. 

"So you really want me to stay behind here and babysit?" Barbara asked. "On a Saturday night in the summer? What if I have plans?"

"I'll pay you forty dollars an hour."

"I don't have plans." She said quickly.