~

Penguin lied that time. Torao was not ok!

Luffy banged on the door again and again, anger taking over him the more the thought settled that Torao was not ok when they were in Drum and Luffy felt an unimaginable amount of guilt for pushing Law to give straight answers that led the older to shut him out. He hadn't seen Law since that day and so he didn't know if Law was really ok.

Luffy tried keeping his angry and sad tears at bay but the more time that passed knocking on the door, the more Luffy starting losing his grip on his emotions till at last the door opened and the angry tears leaked from just a single second of looking in those golden eyes.

"What are you doing here-" Law started asking as soon as he opened the door but Luffy pushed him back and slammed the door shut, the loud noise made Law jump in his place. Luffy took a breath through his nose and Law gulped, he had never seen Luffy look so angry before, the entire air around him was thick.

"Are you an idiot Torao?! You could have died!! Why did you do that?!" Luffy let loose, hitting Law's collarbones with a weak fist, other hand holding his shirt collar, he could only muster so much strength when he was bawling that hard.

"Are you drunk?" Law asked and moved to take a whiff to see if he could smell alcohol because only that way this would all make sense.

"No!! Answer my question!!" Luffy yelled and pushed Law back yet another step, eyes angry and wet, tears no longer there but the feeling lingered displaced in his chest now along with an odd heaviness that what if Law had died?

Law took a hold of Luffy's wrists in both his hands to stop the younger from hitting him again or pushing him back. He was shaken by the intensity of Luffy's emotions directed at him. "I don't even know what you're talking about. Calm down-"

"Back in Drum!! You gave me all your blood! You could have died!!"

"...oh." Law lowered Luffy's arms when all the strength had left the younger at the verbalization of his worries.

"You idiot!" Luffy slumped forward and brought his arms around Law, crying and holding him like he would disappear any second. Law didn't know what to do in this situation except answer the questions. "Why did you do it?!"

"I... don't know." And Law really didn't. It had been the only option available to him that time to keep Luffy alive and he hadn't even questioned the danger of it before diving into it. He didn't really know, even now a month after it, that what actually had made him do it. He just knew he didn't want to let Luffy die.

Luffy cried until he had fallen into a fit of hiccups and looking at the boy being so vulnerable, something overcame Law and he forgot that he was avoiding him. The older unwrapped Luffy's arms from around him and sat him down on the couch, sitting beside him sideways and rubbing his back till he calmed down, keeping an eye out for any panic attacks.

Law couldn't fully wrap his head around the current situation because he was so angry the last time he saw Luffy and now it was like none of that had happened. He couldn't understand why Luffy was so upset at the thought that Law could have died. Maybe it was the same reason as why Law didn't want to let Luffy die but the older was at a loss at pinpointing what that reason actually was.

Luffy sniffled and wiped his eyes, slumping sideways into Law, making the older fall back as well, his back hitting the couch arms. Law sighed but didn't move. Luffy had calmed down a great deal in just a few minutes of being like that.

"Who even told you about this?" Law asked when Luffy's breathing had mostly evened out.

"My doctor friend explained the whole live transfats something."

"Live whole body transfusion." Law corrected and scratched his head before deciding to expand on the memory. "It was the only way to keep you alive." Luffy tensed and got up by pushing on Law's chest. "I was getting blood through my other arm so-"

"You could have done that to me!!" Luffy interrupted, angry again.

"You were already on dialysis and your body was already fighting off the poison, I... we didn't need you going in a hypovolemic shock from the direct transfusion too, so being the only same blood type around to be a safety net, I was the natural option." Law said, detached from the emotions that had run through him when he was fighting Penguin about using him. Luffy didn't like the way Law sounded so cold and distant about something that could have killed him.

"You're explaining it like it was nothing!" Law wanted to roll his eyes when Luffy started crying again but he was quite frankly touched that Luffy cared. His friends had gotten angry with him and that was care too but Luffy was crying for him... Law was not used to that. Seeing that kind of ugly crying, Law was reminded of another idiot that had cried from him. Law shook the memory of his adoptive father out of his head lest it make a home there and haunt him again.

"It was a calculated risk. I'm fine." Law insisted. Luffy wiped his eyes again and the look in them changed when he remembered he still had bruises from his own dialysis.

Luffy looked over Law's arms, hidden beneath the long sleeves of his yellow hoodie. Law didn't know what Luffy was looking for, being so serious all of a sudden and he certainly had not expected Luffy to slide the sleeves back till Law's elbows to expose his arms. Luffy's eyes went wide when he saw the swollen patches, much worse than his, he could also see the numerous prick marks on Law's skin from the needles that were to receive and give blood and fluids.

Law saw Luffy's eyes tear up again. "I'b sowwy!"

"It's fine." Law started. "I've dealt with worse." Law secretly thanked whatever he could that Luffy didn't know about his heart stopping, a reaction to that would have been much worse.

Luffy couldn't stop his tears, all his previous anger gone and replaced with grief now that because he was stupid enough to eat poisonous mushrooms, Torao had suffered. Luffy could tell by looking at Law that he wasn't eating well too or his bruises would have healed by now, like Luffy's. Even his bones were poking Luffy at odd angles.

Still bawling, Luffy brought out the salve Chopper had sent him after he had left for his own home and uncapped the container. He was careful in scooping out the medicine and generously and gently rubbed it on Law's bruises. "Chopper made this, he said it would make the bruises better. I'm leaving it here." Luffy said when he made sure he had covered all of the swollen sites he could see and put the salve aside. Law was stunned at the oddly...sweet way Luffy had taken charge of the situation, wiping at his eyes every few seconds but being serious and focused on the task at hand.

When Luffy buried his head in Law's neck and didn't look like his crying and shaking would stop, Law saw his only option to hug Luffy, to comfort him till he was alright. Law rubbed Luffy's back with one hand and had the other around his shoulder in a comforting grip. It was that day and that moment that Law found out he didn't like to see Luffy cry, reasons unknown, he just didn't like to see Luffy cry.

The silence between the two made the sounds of Luffy's pounding on the door echo in Law's head and that was a sound that usually threw him into panic. Law was very sure that he himself was going to be a mess a few hours from now if he didn't distract his brain enough to forget the sound of knocking on wood and he didn't want Luffy to witness that but Law was also against sending Luffy on his way home when he was so tried from crying and barely awake.

Law sighed and rubbed a hand down his face, not sure if he should tell Luffy to go or if he should trust himself to not fall apart. Luffy's weight spread on Law was comforting but it was also a reminder that this was a closeness Law could not allow to bud more than it already had.

"What happened to your hands?" Law heard Luffy mumble, bringing his face out from Law's neck and resting his cheek against the doctor's collarbone. Luffy ghosted his fingers over the bandages on the older's hand but stopped when Law flinched and moved his hand out of Luffy's sight.

"Busted them punching some men. Some idiot's tooth got left in there."

Luffy hummed then frowned and looked at Law from his position. "Aren't your hands important to you as a doctor?"

"They are." Law admitted.

"Take good care of them then." Law scoffed, Luffy was the last person to be lecturing Law on taking care of himself. Even though it irked him a little, Law found himself answering nonetheless.

"Ok."

"Good."

The two were again enveloped in a silence. Law didn't ask how Luffy knew he was here, he wasn't sure he would like the answer so he kept those questions to himself. Law was pretty sure his heart was beating hard in his chest and that Luffy could hear it with the placement of his head on Law's chest.

Law kept repeating the past hour in his head over and over again, realizing how easy everything with Luffy was. From talking to him, to letting a smile slip, to allowing himself to be light, to be sad, to be angry, how easy it was to start a fight with Luffy and get lost in it, how easy it was that the crack was mended before Law could realize it had mended. And today, though it was Law that was doing the comforting, with Luffy draped over him and breathing evenly, he was also grounding Law. The small conversations they shared felt very... familiar and nostalgic even though there was no memory to fall back on in terms of familiarity and nostalgia. In a corner of his brain, Law felt it was wrong to be with Luffy like this when he had no intentions of letting anything progress and he was pretty sure Luffy wouldn't want to progress anything anyway. This was wrong. Law believed Luffy must feel that too after what he had gone through as a child. There was no way he would be open to something like physical and emotional vulnerability no matter the companion. So Luffy must also be feeling that this was wrong. There was no other way.

"Why is this so easy with you?" Law hadn't meant to say it out loud and he was surprised these words slipped his mouth even unconsciously. By the way Luffy's muscles shifted, he had heard Law, there were no take backs.

"Because it's right." Luffy said loud and clear, breaking through the thick barriers Law was setting in his mind that all of this was wrong. But Luffy didn't think so. Luffy felt something shift in Law and decided it was time to leave the older alone. Luffy had come to be angry at Law and he had found out Law was ok. He had accomplished his tasks. "Can I come see you tomorrow?" Luffy asked, getting up and moving so Law could get up too.

It took Law a while before he shook his head and muttered a "no."

"Please?" Luffy insisted.

"Don't you have school tomorrow?"

"I do but I can come here after school." Law saw the tear stains on the younger's face and relented.

"I'll meet you at the cafe."

"Text me the time ok?"

"Fine." Law waved his hand and watched Luffy walk to the door. He tripped on a stray shoe and bumped his head on the door. Law flinched at the sound and Luffy noticed. "Next time and onwards, whenever there is a wooden door or wooden anything in my presence, do not knock or bang on it. I don't like the sound." Law said as clearly as possible without really telling that those stupid sounds initiate his panic attacks. "Just call me to open the door, if it's a door that is."

Luffy looked at Law for a while, wondering what to make of that information other than the fact that maybe the knocking sound was a trigger for Torao. "But you've blocked me. And you told the reception lady to lie to me."

Law cursed, Luffy was really smart when it came to things like these. "I'll unblock you. And tell Miss Akemi to tell you of my whereabouts. Deal?"

"You're agreeing pretty easy..." Luffy narrowed his eyes and rubbed his chin in suspicion. "Hmmmmm..."

"I think it's pretty useless to avoid you anyway seeing how you're here in spite of my sort of best efforts." Law rolled his eyes.

"Ok deal. Take care Torao." Luffy grinned and Law's heart skipped a beat. He was turning to leave then remembered something. "Oh and don't skip any more meals! Your bones are sticking out! See ya later!"

Law felt around on his torso and indeed he could easily feel his bones. He felt embarrassed that he got told to eat properly even though he was the doctor.

Long after Luffy had left, Law's brain was on a repeat of Luffy telling him that because it was right that it was easy to be with Luffy. It might be right to Luffy but there was something that felt very wrong to Law. The entire night Law couldn't sleep, he was thinking why being like that with Luffy felt wrong, why he always found himself taking care of Luffy, why he didn't like it when Luffy cried, why it was his instinct to comfort Luffy when he was troubled, why he allowed Luffy to touch him when he avoided being touched. He kept thinking and thinking until the image of Lami popped in his brain.

Oh.

~

Luffy took detours to get home. He didn't want to go straight home because he was feeling very down and heavy after leaving the hotel and he needed to make sure none of that showed on his face when he got back home in case Ace or Sabo were awake.

Luffy felt very confused. He understood months ago why his friends were making weird faces and weird comments whenever Luffy talked about Torao, he understood that they thought it was because Luffy liked Torao and while it was that Luffy did like him, it was somehow different too. He wanted to be with Torao, share experiences, eat food together, try new things too... Luffy found out the past month when Torao was not talking to him that he didn't like not knowing what the older was up to, not knowing if he ate or slept, not knowing if he was ok or if he needed help with anything. Luffy did not like that distance Torao kept putting between them. He felt so confused because on one side he wanted to literally attach himself to Torao so he wouldn't miss a thing but he also wanted to give the doctor his space and let him explore and live his own life too, have his own experiences.

Luffy kicked a stone in his path in frustration, he didn't know what he wanted anymore, he just knew that he wanted to spend his time with Torao and not in a friendship sense. He wanted to see how Torao would respond if he did all those things to him that he had seen Ace and Marco do to each other. He wanted to know what it would feel like to hold Torao's hand while being more than friends, he wanted to know if he could get Torao to trust him enough to let him kiss the older.

Wait what?

Where did that come from?

Luffy questioned the direction his thoughts were taking but didn't dwell on it much longer, coming to the conclusion that he wanted to try everything there was in life and world to try but it had to be with Torao. Luffy realized that's how Torao was different from all his friends. That's what made Torao different. Luffy wanted Torao to be the only constant in his life.

Luffy wiped his face once again before turning the key and opening the door to his home, locking it behind him and taking off his shoes. He was passing by the living room and spotted Ace there, watching TV.

"Why're you awake?" Luffy asked and sat down beside his brother.

"Too many attacks today, I can't sleep now." Ace answered and briefly glanced at his brother, noticing his red eyes and tear stained face. "What about you?"

"I went out to meet someone." Luffy answered truthfully, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"Luffy," Ace started and put his arm around his brother's shoulders, pulling him close. "You would tell us if something was bothering you, right?"

"Only if it's something I can't handle myself." Luffy wasn't dumb, he knew what Ace was asking him. "I could handle it this time."

"And you're ok?"

"Yeah." Luffy buried his head in his brother's shoulder and let out a heavy breath. "I'm hungry now though." No answer came from his brother. "Ace?" Luffy raised his head and saw Ace passed out. He picked his brother on his shoulder and tucked him in bed, being careful to be silent since he didn't want to wake Sabo.

Luffy looked around in the fridge for something he could eat but didn't have enough energy to actually take it out and warm it in the microwave. Sabo had left a huge dish of spaghetti for him but Luffy was too tried to warm it so he ate it all like that. He put the dish in the sink and went to his room, stripping to his shorts and flopping on the bed. He was tired but couldn't sleep.

Luffy felt very weird with his thoughts and didn't know who to talk to about that and if he should even talk to someone about it. Luffy dialed Penguin's number and waited but he didn't pick up. A few minutes passed and his phone buzzed with Penguin's call in return.

"Hey Luffy! What's up? I couldn't find my phone, sorry." Penguin started.

"I met Torao today."

"Ohhhh!! And how did it go? Is he ok?"

"No. He's too guarded. And his hands are in a really bad shape."

"Yeah that's going to take some time to heal."

"Why was he so stupid that he got hurt that bad?"

"Law's weird like that. He's a mix of vigilante justice and self-destruction when he's really angry."

"He's really thin now, I thought if I hugged him tight enough he would break in two." Before Penguin could respond to that, Luffy started again. "Why didn't you tell me that it was because of Torao that I survived? That he gave me more than half his blood so I wouldn't die?"

"Law didn't want you to know. He was relieved when I told him that I lied to you."

"What else did you lie to me about?"

"What do you mean?"

"How bad was it for Torao?"

"I can't tell you that if Law himself hasn't."

"That bad huh." Luffy turned on his side and sighed. "Ok Imma hang up. See ya later Peng."

"See you later. Take care Luffy."

Luffy put his phone aside and rested on his back again, spreading his arms on his side and staring at the ceiling. He wanted to talk to Law again already. He yawned and his hand accidentally hit the headpost, the wooden headpost and Luffy remembered the numerous times he noticed Torao jump startled or look uncomfortable at the wooden sound. He wondered if something had happened to Law in the past that he doesn't like those sounds. Going down this line of thinking, Luffy recalled that Law's room door in Flevance, in fact all the doors in that building were metal.

Come to think of it...

Luffy remembered that Law looked like he would crack and break any time. Was it because of those sounds? Luffy cursed inwardly that he had banged that loudly on the door, it must have really brought some bad memories for Torao. Luffy couldn't bear the thought that Law might not be alright right now because of him so he decided to check on him.

|Unblocked me yet?

Luffy quickly typed and sent the message. He wasn't the patient type so he didn't wait around for a text that might not even come. He dialed Law and sat up when the line rang. Torao had unblocked him!

"I said I would text you the time." Law grumbled the moment he answered the call.

"You're ok?" Luffy asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I was hitting your door pretty loud and you said you didn't like the sound, silence usually triggers my panic attacks so I think those sounds trigger yours. So, are you ok?"

"...very perceptive." Law answered and Luffy heard him take a deep breath. "Why aren't you asleep?"

"I feel weird, can't sleep." Luffy let Law change the subject and avoid Luffy's question.

"Weird how?"

"I dunno. Just weird." Luffy laid back down and listened to Torao talk. His voice was soothing at the moment.

"Ok, weird where?"

"In my chest and tummy."

"Did you eat something wrong again?" Law asked, exasperated.

"No, I've learned my lesson!" Luffy defended himself with a pout that was clearly audible to Law on the other end.

"Get it checked out if it continues to bother you. You said you have a doctor friend, have him see it."

"But you're my doctor friend too."

"I'm not functioning well right now so I won't take you in my care."

"Will you be better tomorrow then?"

"Mugiwara-ya..." Law groaned and sighed. "I don't know. I don't know when I'll be better."

"Do you need a hug?" Luffy asked, eyelids drooping a little. Torao's voice was slowly dissipating the weirdness he was feeling in his chest.

"No."

Luffy giggled sleepily at Law's shy response and closed his eyes. "Can you... keep talking to me until I fall asleep?"

"I..."

"Tell me about the circulatory system." Luffy helped on the topic. Torao was a doctor, he would definitely be able to talk endlessly about this.

"Fine." Law sighed and relented. "So the blood circulatory system, also called the cardiovascular system plays the part of delivering nutrients and oxygen to all the cells in the human body. It's a system of organs that includes the heart, blood vessels..."

Law stopped when he heard the soft snoring from the other end of the line. Luffy had really fallen asleep listening to him. For some reason, Law found his heart beating fast and hard and his face felt warm. Luffy's request was odd but Law somewhat liked it that the younger wanted to sleep to his voice.

What the fuck.

Law groaned so loud his throat hurt. He had been trying to create distance between himself and Luffy but today he had managed to do just the opposite. He had once again gotten dragged in Luffy's pace!

But... maybe it isn't so bad.

Law clenched his hands into fists and sighed. Luffy was unpredictable and Law was tired. He didn't want to think anymore. He was confused. He wanted to stay away but going with Luffy's flow was easier and he sort of liked it too.

Get a grip Law!

Rubbing his temples, Law exhaled deeply. He had sat down to bandage his hands again then Luffy had called and he had stopped his task. Law resumed his work and cleaned his knuckles, wincing at the burn, rubbed the medicine Luffy had given him and rolled firm bandages around his hands. It would take time for them to heal. He had indeed been blind and stupid that his greatest assets got hurt. He was tired. He was so very tired. Sighing again, Law put the things aside and went to bed. Whether he would be able to sleep or not, he would find out.

~