Today was an absolute mess.

I'm no one without Brendon.

I'm just a mess.

I can't get anything done.

I can't stay focused.

I can't do anything.

I can't have fun.

I can't take care of my own child.

Clays sad.

It's just a mess.

Clay has to wake me up today because I didn't wake up, and it was already 12.

I woke up to 3 missed calls from Brendon.

**

"H-hey." Brendon's voice rang on the other side. I felt myself smile, but weakly.

"Hi, how's the weather?" Wow, great question Ryan.

"O-oh, it's pretty good. It's raining right now. But I like the rain. I-it reminds me of..." there was a long pause on the other side of the phone. "You." I felt tears roll down my cheeks. Clay was still at the foot of my bed. "How's Clay doing?" Brendon asked choking on his words.

"He had to wake me up." I said placing my arm out and Clay ran towards it jumping up and onto my bed. I placed him in my lap and he snuggled into my chest.

"Oh." Brendon said on the other side.

"How's it going so far?" I asked feeling my voice breaking.

"Ok, babe?"

"Mhm?" I mumbled holding tighter to Clay.

"It's nothing without you."

**

Only 27 more days right?

But would if it goes well?

Then we'd have to move.

Or he'd have to move...

He wouldn't leave his family,

Would he?

~~~~
A/N
Geesus depressing chapter
Anyways..
Today in drama we did a character building thing where we made characters and here's what mine was:
Name: Sarah
Pronouns: she/her
Age: 19
Going?: bass practice
Passion: playing bass
Weakness: dyslexia
Fear: being put on the spot light
Trait: confident
So yeah I put some thought into it and I'm thinking of drawing her:)
We had an all string practice today during study hall and I play viola and I'm the only one in my grade there's 6 in 6th grade but they all started this year and one in 8th grade who said she doesn't really understand how to play so i was like carrying it
Yeah but we sounded pretty good :)
Also today during PE I was paired with one of my frens and we're doing basketball and he was super sweet about me not being too good and he's such a good fren:)
Anyways
•Song Suggestion•: Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) by Fall Out Boy AHHHH
•Fanfic Suggestion•: Bonjour | Frerard by dasher- it's so good and I'm still reading it but I've gone through so many different emotions it's so good go read it:))

~~~~
A/N
So I did update yesterday but Wattpad deleted the chapter it was a lot more detailed then this but I'm so upset it deleted it:(
But here's the rewritten chapter
So here's a story from today:
I was sitting in English and the boy next to me was bouncing his scissors on his thigh and I told him he was gonna stab me and at one point the bounces got really intense and then out of no where the scissors lodged themselves into my thigh then fell out HE STABBED MY THIGH WITH SCISSORS AND IT HURT SOOO MUCH!! And I whisper-yelled at him and he went to touch my thigh like as a sympathy thing and the said: "wait I can't touch there." And oh my god it still hurts anyways
•Song Suggestion•: Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) by Fall Out Boy
•Fanfic Suggestion•: Bonjour | Frerard by dasher- it's super good and I've gone through so many emotions with it please go read it
Also please read my rand0m book I post my art in it sometimes yeah

So Wattpad randomly had this come back so here's the chapter I wrote yesterday
~enjoy killjoys~