I Don't Want To Be Here Anymore

Danny crossed the room and hugged Jessica. She didn't even fight him off. She leaned into his embrace.
"I'm sorry Jessica! I didn't mean yell at you and say that it was your fault. It wasn't. It wasn't your fault and wasn't Stephanie's. It just happened." He said gently rubbing her back.
"Oh Danny, I can't believe our baby girl is gonna have a baby! I did not see this coming!" Jessica sobbed.
"We'll get through this together! I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to be here for you and for Stephanie." He said then trying to lighten the mood. "So, should we go check on our girl...grandma?"
"Hey!" Jessica exclaimed then hit him gently on the arm. She giggled then rested her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around Danny. "Oh god! We are gonna have a grand baby...grandpa!"
They both laughed, then their lips finally found each other.
After a few more moments, they broke apart. Jessica smiled and Danny smiled back. "Oh Danny, we can't changed the past, but now we just have to look forward to our future."
Danny nodded. "Yes, I don't want to spend another second apart."
Jessica gave him a quick peck on the lips.
"I'm gonna go check on Stephanie. Maybe we can salvage dinner."

Jessica walked to her bedroom; she knock on the door but there was no answer. She opened the door then stepped inside.
Stephanie wasn't anywhere in sight.
Jessica then noticed the bathroom door slightly open.
She pushed it open and screamed at the sight of her daughter lying motionless on the floor; Stephanie had her hands clutched to her stomach, foam coming out of her mouth.
"Stephanie!!!!" Jessica rushed to her daughter's side. "Oh my baby girl! Why! Danny!!!!! Danny!"
Danny was through the door in a matter of seconds. "Jessica, what....."
"Call an ambulance Danny! Hurry!" Jessica yelled as she held Stephanie in her arms.
Danny went into Jessica's bedroom and got out his cell phone and called 911.

"Oh Stephanie! Please don't leave me! I love you so much baby girl!" Jessica sobbed.
She rocked Stephanie back and forth.
Danny ran back to the bathroom. "They're on their way!"
Jessica looked into his eyes. "I can't lose her Danny! I wouldn't be able to take it!"

Two minutes later Danny led the way to bathroom. Danny gently took Jessica in his arms as the paramedics worked on Stephanie.

Next moment they had her on the gurney and rolled her outside and loaded her into the ambulance.
Jessica wanted to go with Stephanie in the ambulance but Danny said he would drive behind them.

Danny followed the ambulance, he found a parking spot as they were unloading Stephanie and pushing the gurney she was on through the emergency doors.
Jessica didn't wait for Danny to finish parking and jumped out of the car and ran after her daughter.

By the time Danny found Jessica she was on the floor sobbing.
She saw Danny and ran to him. "They won't let me go back there! They told...me to wait...out here!" She sobbed uncontrollably.

A nurse came up to them then and motioned them to follow her.
"The doctors are working on your daughter right now and they asked me to bring you into a private room to wait for him. He'll come to see you as soon as he can." The nurse said.

Jessica tried to ask how Stephanie was but the nurse said she didn't have an update just yet.

After a few minutes Jessica was in hysterics. "Hold me Danny! Just hold me!"
Danny did just that. He held her close to him and she concentrated on the beating of his heart as she rested her head on his chest.
Next moment they were staring into each other's eyes; the pull was so strong. They didn't know what it was but all of their pain of being away from each other for all these years came boiling to this point.
They kissed passionately and furiously. They forgot their surrounding for a moment. Jessica began to unbuckle Danny's jeans.
"Jessica?" Danny asked uncertainly.
"Danny please! Just...I need you please!" She begged.

It was quick; it was rough and needy.
Danny released himself right after Jessica and they both began to come down from their high.
They fixed their clothes and sat down next to each other holding each other's hand waiting for news about their daughter.

Jessica began to drift off in Danny's arms when the doctor came in.
Jessica shot up and looked at the doctor for any sign from his expression.
But the doctor's face was a mask; there was no emotion in it.
"Mrs. Lange..." The doctor began. "We did everything we could to save your daughter but it was too late. She was gone before she reached the hospital."
Color drained from Jessica's face. "No! No! Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!" She screamed over and over again.
Danny grabbed her before she hit the floor.

An hour later, Jessica woke up and was laying on a hospital bed.
She saw Danny sitting in a chair and he was holding her hand. Then she saw Kathy standing behind him.
She looked into Danny's eyes and said. "Please tell me...that it was just a dream! Please tell me that my baby girl will walk through that door any minute."
Danny squeezed her hand with tears streaming down his cheeks.
Kathy stepped forward and sat next to Jessica on the bed. She took Jessica's other hand and held tight. "I'm sorry Jessica but it wasn't a dream. Stephanie is...gone."
A sound escaped Jessica's lips but their was no name to describe it. Kathy held her in her arms trying to comfort her sister. Jessica held onto Kathy for dear life.
"Why? Why? Why?" Jessica kept repeating. "I want my baby girl! She needs me! She needs me!"



The weeks that followed were the darkest days that Jessica had ever gone through.
The funeral was small; the cast of AHS was there and even Stevie Nicks was there. She sang Stephanie's favorite song which was Landslide.

After the funeral, Danny moved in and was there for Jessica. He and Kathy did their best to help Jessica but it was no use.

She like a zombie, she hardly ate or slept and she didn't speak to anyone.
She began to sleep only when she started to sleep in Stephanie's room. Jessica would curl up in a ball on the bed and hold Stephanie's blanket close to her.

Most days she would just stare at the wall and others she would cry all day, crying out for Stephanie.
She began to feel guilty; she shouldn't have let Stephanie leave her side that day. She should have kept her close.


Eight weeks had gone by since Stephanie's funeral.
Jessica began to eat but very little.
Kathy resorted to making Jessica drink protein shakes just so she could have something in her stomach.

Jessica lost weight and she had no motivation to go on with life. She even began to get sick. She would throw up the protein shakes she drank and the little food she did manage to eat. She couldn't keep anything down.

One day, Kathy held Jessica's hair back while she vomited into the toilet. After she was done a few minutes later, Jessica flushed the toilet and sat back against the tub and laid her head on Kathy's shoulder.
"Kathy?" Jessica whispered.
"Yes?" Kathy asked.
"I don't want to be here anymore. I want to be with my baby girl. I want to go with Stephanie and my grand baby! I want to be with them! I can't take it...it hurts too much!" She sobbed so hard she began to have trouble breathing.
"Jessica! Calm down please! Breathe! Come on now! Breathe!" Kathy said, tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Kathy...everything...is getting dark." Jessica said softly. "I can't...see."
"Jessica! Jessica! Oh Jesus!" Kathy cried out. She laid Jessica on the floor gently and ran to the living room.

Danny was sitting on the sofa dealing with his feelings in his own way. He cried when no one was around. Most days, well, when Jessica was around him he would have to be strong. But most of the time he would cry until there were no more tears left.
His heart ached for his daughter and grandchild that never got the chance to live. His heart ached for the love of his life who was slowly dying before his eyes.
Danny sat lost in thought when he heard Kathy calling his name.
"Danny! It's Jessica! I don't know what's wrong her, she just passed out, her pulse his very weak."
Danny sprang into action, he called the ambulance then he and Kathy ran to Jessica's side.
Danny got down on the floor and gently cradled Jessica in his arms. "Jessica, baby? Wake up now! Don't leave me here alone! We lost our daughter but I refuse to lose you too! Come on baby wake up for me."
Jessica stirred a bit. "Danny?"
"Yes Jess I'm here. I'm here baby." He said.
She stared directly at him but he could tell she was somewhere else.
"I see...her Danny! I see Stephanie! She's...holding our grand baby! It's a girl! A granddaughter!" Jessica was saying.
"Jessica, what are you talking about?" Danny asked in a panic. Kathy stared in shock, she was sobbing.
"Stephanie said...it's all going to be okay. We...are going to be okay." Jessica said one final time before she slipped deeper into darkness.

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