⚠️Warning: Contains scenes mentioning depression and loss, and depicts scenes of violence and that towards women. If affected, please read with caution.⚠️

~~~~~

《1992》

*Nikki*

Time passed since we lost the baby, and Mal has tried her best to recover.

Sadly, it had caused both of us to break sobriety.

Many friends, family and fans gave us their condolences.

We had a small private little funeral for our baby, burying her in the cemetary. We figured she needed a name so... We settled and named her Angel.... Angel Grey Sixx....

Mal has grieved and was depressed from it all, shutting out almost everyone at first.

She had eventually snapped and also fell off the wagon not long after I did, when I came home from the store one day and found her downing the rest of the Jack I had gotten, and another. I had also found her with some pills, but I quickly took them away from her before she did something.

Her nightmares had also come back, and she's lost a lot sleep because of it.

The holidays were no better. Mal just spent her birthday at home with me, and we didn't really do anything. Thanksgiving, my birthday, and Christmas were no exception, either.

This month, February, me and her been feeling even more upset these past week, since this could have been the month Angel was born....

Then there was the album we were working on. Despite us getting work done, friction was starting to grow, and the tension in the room sometimes got too thick.

Today we were all in the studio to rehearse for the new record before we start recording, but a certain singer was eating shit.... again!

I sighed as I slammed the phone on the receiver for what felt like the 50th time.

Damn it, Vince!!!

On top of Mal's depression and everyone's relapses, Vince stopped showing up a lot, too. Mick's disease is starting to get to a point where even laying down is hurting him. Nothing is fun while recording now, all we do majority of the time now is argue and butt heads.

Mal's tried to help keep us from tearing each other apart, but at the same time she's struggling in silence, and its killing me.

I then heard the click from the sound booth.

"Its pouring out there, Nikki, it probably got too flooded near his place," She said into the mic, trying to excuse him. "It was a miracle you and I even made it here without crashing."

"Mal, I doubt it," I snapped, then, getting up and pacing a little.

It was quiet as I quickly realized I snapped and sighed. "I'm sorry... Baby, Mal, I'm sorry.... Have you tried calling him?"

"I tried a few times... No answer," she said as I looked at Tommy and then at Mick. "Look, I'll keep calling, just start without him and he can catch up if he shows."

I sighed and nodded as Tommy started to pace again. "We'll see..." I said as the mic went quiet and I walked over, getting my bass.

"I'm telling you guys, everything is fucking upside-down and flip-flopping, and while we're waiting for our lead singer to get his head out of his ass, we're getting left in the dust, man," Tommy snapped.

"I'm just saying, bands replace their front men and it still works. Van Halen-"

"I know Van Halen fucking did it, 'cause you say it every single time Vince misses a fucking rehearsal!" I snapped.

"Well?" Tommy snapped as I went to sit down. "Mick?"

"Shut it," Mick snapped as I sat next to him, then sighed. 

"Where is this asshole?" He sneered quietly. "Every second that goes by, I feel another bone rotting from this fucking disease."

I sighed as I tuned my bass a little.

"Call the prick again," Mick suddenly snapped at me.

I sighed and reached for the phone, dialing again.

*Vince*

I sat on the couch just watched the Van Halen interview on TV.

I then hear the phone ring for what felt like the millionth time, and tried to ignore it as I sighed.

We had rehearsals today, but I really didn't feel like doing anything, let alone was motivated to go anyway. Plus, its raining like hell outside right now.

Not like the album's coming out great anyway...

After a few seconds I grunt and grab the phone and just ripped the batteries out before throwing it aside and laying back on the couch, looking at the ceiling.

It wasn't long before suddenly I heard my fax machine ring.

Are you fucking kidding me?

I got up and stormed over, seeing the message starting to print out in Nikki's handwriting as I rip it out and read it.

GET YOUR 

ASS

OVER HERE

_   NOW   

I scoffed in anger, crumpling the paper up and then storming to the front door, grabbing my car keys.

That's it.

*Mallory*

"Vince, its Mal... Look, I know you're dealing with a lot of shit right now, but the guys need you... Please come as soon as you can, or... Or at least call... Let us know you're still alive, let me know at least. You know you can always talk to me..... Just... Call me when you can, okay?" I sighed, then hang up.

"Nothing?" The sound guy asked.

"Straight to voicemail. Nikki already sent him a fax not too long ago," I sighed as I sat down next to him while I watched the guys rehearse.

"Maybe if we save that fill until the second chorus when we come in with the-"

**SLAM!!**

I jumped as I turned and see Vince storm in, cutting off Mick as he told Nikki something.

"Someone want to tell me what the fuck's going on here?!" he snapped at the guys.

"Shit," I mumbled, getting up and rushing out towards the door to the sound booth.

"Let's save us all some time, especially yours, Vince, as it's clearly more fucking valuable than ours," Nikki snapped as I came in.

"Guys, come on, let's just calm down," I said.

"You better tell me what the fuck's going on," Vince sneered at Nikki.

"What's going on is we're down here, and we're working, and we wanna be here, but we're tired of forcing you to be here with us," Nikki snapped.

"Maybe I'd come in more if I like the material," Vince scoffed.

That's when Tommy suddenly slammed his drumsticks down and I held my hand up at him in case it got ugly.

"Maybe you'd like the material if you were in the studio making it with us instead of staring at your fucking watch!!" Tommy snapped.

"Yeah, I'm staring at my watch because this album is fucking stupid!!" He shouted.

"Vince, please, calm down, let's all just relax, we can talk about this," I pleaded. "Peacefully, please."

Everyone just scoffed and went quiet.

"I know you are all stressing over this, you guys are struggling with this album, I get it..... But you have been in spots like this before, and you four can't just let it get the best of you," I said. "We can all just take a break, eat something, then we can peacefully talk and work without any pressure, talk about whatever we can fix or keep settle our difference."

Everyone just sighed as they tried to calm down, then Vince just laughed humorlessly all of a sudden.

"You know what, fuck all y'all," he said. "You know what, I am done. Fuck this. I quit."

"Vince!" I said.

"Good, 'cause you're fucking fired!" Nikki shouted.

"I already quit, dick!" Vince shouted as he stormed out.

"Vince, wait!!" I called out, getting up and going after him.

"Mal, stop!" Nikki called out, but I was already out the door, outside with Vince as I grabbed his arm.

"Vince please, think this through," I begged.

"I fucking did, MJ, and I am fucking done with this, especially you!" he suddenly snapped, pulling his arm away. "All you do is fucking mope around now, shutting us all out, still here and for fucking what!?"

My eyes widen in shock at his words.

"You even tried to leave us all, three fucking times, so why do you even care!?" he snapped.

"I was going through shit, too, damn it, I still am!" I snapped. "And maybe I'm fucking moping around because I keep losing the people I love!! I just lost a baby I thought was going to survive, my second one!!! I don't want to lose the only family I have left, yet it feels like I am!!!"

He just scoffed and was about to walk away.

"Vince, please!" I begged him. "Think about Skylar!"

He stopped and quickly spun around. "Don't you dare, Mallory," he snarled, storming up to me.

"If you leave, what then?" I snapped. "She just spends the rest of her life thinking what everyone else is thinking about her daddy? A loser, a washed up rock star?! A dead beat!?"

"Just shut up!!" he snarled. "You don't even get it!!!"

"No, okay, I get you are angry and upset and have every right to be but you cannot just take it out on everyone else!!!" I snapped.

"Why not!? This band's the fucking reason I barely see my kid to begin with, why my wife left me!!" he snapped. "They've taken their shit out on me before so why not!?"

"At least you still have a kid to take care of!! I have 2 dead kids that I never even had the chance to hold, let alone see!!!!" I shouted.

"It is not my fault you got defective ass parts!!" he snarled.

My eyes widen at his words, and I glared at him.

"You know what, maybe Sharise had the right idea when she packed her bags and left your ass, and maybe she should get full custody from you while she's at it so Skylar doesn't see the kind of disappointing bastard her father really is!!!" I shouted.

**SMACK!**

I cried out as I felt a strong hit to my cheek and mouth as I fell to the ground, pain shooting across my face.

I hear him gasp and I looked up at him in horror as I realized what happened.

Vince hit me...

I carefully felt my lip and gasped as I saw some blood on my fingertips.

"MJ... O-Oh my god.... Oh my god, I-I'm so sorry, MJ, I-I didn't mean it, I'm so sorry.......!!" he said, a horrified look in his face.

I couldn't even speak from the shock as he took a step forward to help me up when....

"HEY!" Nikki's voice suddenly snarled.

"NIKKI, NO, STOP, DON'T!!" Tommy's voice shouted as the next thing I knew Vince was tackled straight to the ground by Nikki and I was quickly pulled away to my feet before seeing Nikki started to wail on him, someone holding me back.

"NIKKI, NO!!!" I shouted as I shook off the hands and ran to him, trying to hold him back, Tommy rushing over to help me. "GET OFF HIM, NIKKI, STOP!! STOP, PLEASE!! NIKKI!! GET OFF HIM, STOP!!!! STOP IT, DON'T DO IT!!!! NIKKI!!!"

"SIXX, STOP, COME ON!!! LET HIM GO!!! YOU MADE YOUR POINT, MAN!!!! STOP!!!" Tommy also begged.

"BOTH OF YOU, GET THE HELL OFF EACH OTHER!!!!" Mick shouted from nearby as the sound tech guy tried to help break up the fight.

We eventually managed to pull them apart, me holding Nikki's arm as he panted as Tommy held him in a hold, and see Vince managed to land a few punches on him, but Nikki did some damage to him, too.

He panted as I held him, looking at Vince get up, his face bloody as the sound tech guy stood between them, just in case we were looking at another fight.

Vince stepped back, wiping blood from his lip, and then stormed off.

Nikki got up as Tommy helped him and he quickly went over to me. He held my face, examining it.

"I'm fine, I-I'm fine, I'm fine," I said, shaking from what just happened. "I-I'm fine."

He sighed and held me tightly to his chest, his arms tightly around me as I rested my other cheek on his chest.

Vince hit me.... He actually hit me...

***

Nikki had a busted lip and a bloody nose, along with a black eye now forming, his knuckles bruised and slightly bloody.

I had him press ice over his eye as I cleaned his lip as we sat in the sound room.

Somebody took care of my bloody lip, too.

I was lost in though as I cleaned Nikki's face, when suddenly something cold on my cheek pulled me back into reality, making me jump as Nikki held me to calm down, and I realized he was looking at me, the ice pack on my cheek.

"Hey hey hey hey.... Its okay.... It was starting to bruise..." he said.

I looked over at the mirror across and sure enough, my cheek already had a dark red spot forming on my cheek.

I gulped and nodded as I tried holding it in as he placed the ice pack back on my cheek, but tears still fell.

"Mal... Baby, what's wrong? Do you feel something hurting?" he asked with worry, moving the ice pack away.

I sniffled and shook my head, moving the ice pack away and looking down, hugging myself.

"What's wrong?" he asked again.

I couldn't hold it anymore and tears fall down my cheek as I shook my head.

"H-He hit me...." I shuddered quietly. "Vince hit me..."

He frowned. "You've taken punches during fights before.... Hell, even from guys..."

I shook my head. "Not from any of you four....."

He frowned. "But, that... That one time I...."

"That was different... You grabbed me, and you weren't sober... But you never hit me...." I cried. "None of you.... Ever..."

He seemed to understand and pulled me into a hug as I cried into his shoulder, clinging to him.

"I said some awful things to him, but... I-I didn't think he would actually-"

"No, stop," he said, pulling back and holding my face carefully in his hands. "That is still no excuse for hurting you like that."

I sniffled and clung to him.

"H-He was my best friend..." I murmured, still in shock.

"I know...." he whispered, rubbing my back.

We stayed like this for a while, before we finally spoke.

"Why don't we go home and get some rest, huh?" he asked, wiping my tears away. "The rain slowed down a little so we should be fine getting home. You need some rest, baby....."

I sniffled and nodded as he helped me stand, grabbing his jacket and draping it over my shoulders as Tommy walked in.

"You guys are leaving?" He asked.

"Mal is really shaken up about what just happened," Nikki said.

Tommy frowned as I looked up at him and his eyes widen at the bruise on my cheek.

"Jesus..." he mumbled.

"Did you find him?" Nikki asked.

"He's gone, man.... No way he's gonna come back," Tommy sighed.

We were all quiet as then Nikki escorted me to the car and we all went home.

What's going to happen now?

~~~~~

I finally ordered The Heroin Diaries (physical copy) and it arrived today, so yay! Looking forward to finally read it! 🤘🏻🖤

🎧 Currently in Sapph's playlist:

Avenged Sevenfold
"Nightmare"

https://youtu.be/94bGzWyHbu0

♡~ sapphire.