─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

❝ Sometimes you fall and don't want to stand up again because you're afraid the same thing could happen, worse, or your loved ones will worry. it continues to haunt you until there's darkness but there is also that light flickering at the end of the path, so don't ignore it just because it's small, the intensity, though is big ❞

✨

C H A P T E R O N E

CHANGMIN STANDS IN the center of the stage, raising his head to meet eyes with his classmates. Then, the theatre dims, lights flashing on him.

He can't move as the sound of his heart thumping in his ears becomes louder.

Blood gushing through his veins.

Warmth creeping up his cheeks.

The pupil of his chocolate eyes dilating. The barely noticeable breaths he takes are replaced by fear, tightening around his chest, making it difficult to breathe.

Why is he here in the first place?

Right—he's going to show them that he's worth it and what he loves best—dance and if he doesn't do it, then what?

He's got his family and friends by his side.

He wants to dance. He reminds himself.

He can do this.

Yes, you can. Just do it.

Dance, a physical form of art where one lets go of everything and is the music's partner or however, the performer wants to think, allowing one to express how they feel.

A smile makes its way to his lips, chocolate eyes shining from the light as anxiety crawls across his skin.

He stands there in fear of making a mistake, but the thought slowly vanishes along with his heartbeat steadying the moment the music starts.

He moves fast, lifts a hand over his face, lowers his body down, hands creating a whirl, arms flowing out at either side like a wave that almost falls. His hands curl into fists as if he's held by a warm word like rain sprinkling down on the ones that need comfort and a sense of calmness, for that is hope.

Rain isn't alone doing justice.

There's oxygen too because without it all living beings wouldn't survive anyway.

Breathe.

He reminds himself. He breathes through his nose, and then out by his mouth.

He glides with the music and the two switch their tasks. Instead, the music follows him.

His heart pounds against his chest as he drifts across the stage. Spinning his head around before returning to the anterior position, he reaches out for someone to pull him and save him from the darkness that has submerged him, then twirls like a snowflake that drops melting.

Changmin sitting up against the white bookshelf with books sprawled across his legs jerks awake at the sound of his phone ringing beside him, accidentally bumping his head against the shelf.

His eyes widen when he sees the ten missed calls and twenty messages appear on the phone's home screen.

The only people that would frantically message him would be his sisters, his mother, or his two best friends.

Chanhee is already at university, unpacking, and then Kevin . . . Kevin . . . wait, Kevin?

The moonlight boy, Kevin Moon?

SHIT.

How could he forget about their university orientation that's today from twelve in noon until five in the afternoon?

It's fine.

It's fine, really.

He'll just need to run quick, hoping he isn't too late.

Before he could even scurry out of the quiet library filled with the ticking of the clock, his phone rings, and this time, it's indeed Kevin Moon.

Changmin apologizes quietly to everyone he passes by speed walking, listening to his best friend ramble about missing the bus.

"Says the one who was too excited that he stayed up watching movies."

"We don't speak of that."

Kevin knows Changmin will get back at him for this because he doesn't like mentioning or hearing about the past ever since . . . something. He'd rather not talk about neither is he too enthusiastic about it.

"I'll be there in like five minutes."

"What, are you flash or something?"

"Something like that," Changmin replies, walking downstairs. His eyes land on a bicycle outside from the window, lips tugging into a lopsided grin, "I deliver chicken and pizza part-time, remember? I know my routes quite well."

. . .

CHEERS OF ENDEARMENT and excitement fill the dark auditorium traveling through the dancers' ears' auditory canal.

The sounds blend in with the thumping of their hearts as two dance crews compete over the songs that are given.

Behind the stage, Hyunjae and Juyeon argued over if BLACKPINK 's "DDU DU DDU DU" or SEVENTEEN'S "Getting Closer" would play, while Eric just watched them.

He knew full well neither of them would play just by a wild guess, but they wouldn't listen to him.

As NCT U's "Baby Don't Stop" starts fading away, signaling its end, three of them exchange a look. Small amounts of hope sparkle in their eyes, heart racing, anxious about the results.

Everyone has gone silent and the auditorium seems almost pitch black except for the lights above, spilling across the stage.

"The Tigers win!"

Astonishment paints the three best friend's faces, taken aback by the group hug and bouncing up and down; the loud buoyant screaming filling their ears and gleeful smiles lighting up their faces.

Hyunjae pulls away from the group hug, walking over to congratulate the other group, noticing one of the groupmates bullying their teammate.

He sprints to the sight, ready to help, talk it out, but it seems like that isn't going to work out.

Juyeon, catching the sight of his best friend, rushes over. He pulls Hyunjae aside, telling him to leave. His eyes then trail up to see the boy who hurt his best friend.

Juyeon isn't someone who would fight but if someone hurt his family or friends, he will pay them back equally, and so he does.

He chuckles under his breath and the next second throws a punch square in the face of the very boy, finding himself face to face with another one of their opponents.

"Hey! Don't even think about hurting Juyeon!" Eric and Hyunjae holler, rushing to his side.

Hyunjae catches the other guy by his arm, stopping the punch midair. He whirls around to protect Juyeon from his back, and Eric defends him from his side.

"I got your back," Hyunjae says, voice comforting.

"I'm basically by your side," Eric adds, giving him a reassuring smile.

"Okay fine, then we're gonna go down and rise together," Juyeon beams. The three of them know how it ends, even if it's just finding themselves in a bear and tiger's fight.

. . .

CHANGMIN KNOWS HE shouldn't do things that are dangerous for him but right now he's determined to not miss the bus; surely his parents would understand.

His parents have become "overprotective" after the accident in the past.

They want him healthy and happy. His sisters agree even though sadness hides behind their concern, knowing how much their brother loves dancing.

Changmin obliged after a few months. He didn't want his family to worry too much about him and seeing them like this made him more anxious.

Changmin chooses to ignore this, for now, dropping the bicycle aside on the sidewalk, kneeling on his leg, fingers quickly tying laces that lay lifelessly across his tennis shoes before raising his head to see the traffic lights fade into a bright red, and then he runs.

Kevin, who sighs of relief, catching the raven in his vision, asks the bus driver to stop the bus, which takes at least three attempts with his joyous smile because who wouldn't fall for his smile and the crescent moons shining in his dark brown eyes?

When the automatic doors slide open, Changmin walks up the steps, maneuvering down the aisle to take a seat with a worried Kevin, asking him, "You weren't kidding about being flash or something, but are you okay?"

His gaze falls down where the younger's hand is planted on his knee, thumb stroking there as he catches his breath.

"I'm okay," Changmin replies, a smile lifting on his lips.

Maybe he shouldn't have run—but it felt nice after a long time.

The past is the past. He's not letting that horrifying accident and the events attached darken his mood.

It's best if he doesn't recall but it only serves a purpose he hasn't quite realized.

"Why were you late, by the way?"

"You should blame my mom. She thought me being a library assistant part-time would be less dangerous and it's not my fault that reading makes me sleepy."

Kevin laughs, unaware of Changmin glaring at him.

"Stop laughing. Falling asleep while reading is quite common."

"Okay, okay. The fact I stopped the bus, so you could get on, and I can escort you to Seoul National University, please don't be upset at me."

"That's very thoughtful of you. Thank you, every teacher's favorite student of SNU Liberal Arts School."

"Hey, why bring that up? No matter what school you go to, I'm willing to follow you. Your parents even know." Kevin reminds.

Changmin chuckles at this, turning to face him with a grin.

"How about you switch majors to theatre arts and film production? You can also convey emotions and help people through this like education, right?"

"I want to be someone who inspires kids, see them grow, and help them learn along the way before growing into teenagers. I didn't mean that filmmakers aren't great. I just . . . no I won't change my major."

"That's our seat, move," a voice brings them out of their conversation, meeting eyes with a classmate judging by the university's symbol on his jacket who seems around their age.

His cheeks are soft and round contrasting the muscular build he holds, whose dull but sharp eyes are laughing secretly.

"What? Are you deaf or not going to move?"

"No. I don't see your name on here or anywhere in this bus, so find another seat," Changmin says nonchalantly, placing his hand over Kevin's, giving a firm squeeze.

His determined eyes not leaving the ridiculously not so familiar handsome guy that screams bad boy.

He ignores the whispered, "what are you doing?" from Kevin, tightening his grasp over his hand.

These jerks just want attention.

Changmin decides an arm rustle will work because it's not so dangerous, right?

His parents totally wouldn't panic if they come to know this: Changmin slamming down his clasped hand in the other's, surprising the fourth year.

He can't help but smile in victory, hearing the crowd around them cheer in happiness, watching the fourth-year apologizing, then walk away. "Thank you for what you did back there. No one really stood up against him from what I've heard, so that was brave of you," a girl says.

"I'm just playing fair. I don't like it when others are treated unfairly and besides, someone had to speak or make some sense into him," Changmin turns around, throwing her an easy smile.

She smiles back a soft one, returning to her seat, lips tugging into a fond smile as a memory of her and the boy awakes in her mind.

I recognize you but you don't.

I still love you. Do you know, Changmin?

. . .

"You two are first years, right?" The Seoul National University's dance club manager inquires. Changmin nods, excitement rushing through him.

"Your time is flexible. It's a good time for part-time jobs, but this position is competitive because of the good benefits. What's better is when working on the stage, you get to meet the dance crew. Do you know the dance team?"

His smile drops from the silence.

Well, it's not like everyone knows them. "Boys and girls with the best looks are all in it."

Changmin laughs, "Oh, there's no way we're getting in, then."

"Don't . . . don't give up," he insists, "can you dance?"

"He can't just dance. Changmin once won first place in a dancing competition during middle school. He has met some CEOs of the K-pop entertainment industries," Kevin's smile stretches across his face taking in the proud smile Changmin's wearing.

"Fill in the application form. After this, getting selected will depend on your luck."

"Are you going to join or not?" Changmin turns to look at Kevin, holding the flyer of the dance club. "If you want, I'll join," Kevin answers.

"You were so good, so you gave up?"

"I just want to finish school."

"Changmin's being modest. He's great on stage," Kevin knows his reason for covering up the truth as he signs the form.

He hopes the boy doesn't dwell on the past forever because maybe there is another chance if he tries dancing again, even just a little.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A U T H O R 'S N O T E

first thing first, this whole chapter is dedicated to the one and only excellingfetus for helping me edit, come up with ideas for the book, listening to my ideas, and reassuring me that this chapter isn't bad. you're truly the best and when I was feeling down you helped me stand up again 💖

I know I've been sorta mia and decided to take a break after finals, so writing was difficult for me, especially considering how the last few days I was feeling emotionally + physically unwell. but here we are, this is the result of writing last week! what do you think? do the characters make sense? personally, I feel like it could have been better?

it's probably just me like what jiminfication mentioned rereading over your own work too many times will cause doubt.

I'd like to clarify again because I'm struggling lately with writing, the beginning of this book will be similar to the drama SKATE INTO LOVE but later on the scenes will come from my imagination + inspirations.

if you're still reading, happiest New Year again! it's another year, and even though if something bad happens this week like for me, let's not let it determine our whole year like one of my dear friends reminded me inhibition let's be hopeful and stay strong, we got this!

lastly, thank you for giving this book a try, I hope you guys enjoy reading and that I can make you proud ❤️ 💛 💚 💙 💜