this chapter is dedicated to rinisnottumbly. my first ever voter!!!!

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Emily's POV

I wake up to the sound of the shower running. Squinting my eyes, I get up and fix my hair up.

Remembering what happened last night, I frown. What made Luke snap last night? Was he really annoyed because of me? I was still upset with him though. It was just a simple prank. He reacted as if I killed his cat. I don't know why he got so angry.

For the past month, everything had been going fine but now Luke suddenly snaps again. It's like déjà vu. A month ago, the same thing happened. Luke became arrogant and ignorant towards everyone until I knocked some sense into him and everything became fine. And, now its happening all over again. Does he get annoyed every month? Is it like his routine or something?

Maybe he gets periods too! That's why he becomes cranky like girls. Yeah I think that's it, so I conclude that he does get periods. Although it is impossible for him to get periods, I think its in his genes or something. Maybe somehow a monkey gene got into his system and changed his DNA so he started getting periods. Wait.... Monkeys get period too?

I am brought out from my thoughts by the bathroom door opening. Luke enters the room wearing jeans without a shirt.

Man the abs! ughhh. Why does he have to be so...so... I don't even know. He is too good looking to be real.

He hasn't noticed that I am awake. He turns to close the door.

Daayyyummm dat ass.

He turns and looks to me and I suddenly remember that I am angry with him and I turn away frowning. I can feel his gaze on me, when he starts walking over towards me I quickly get off the bed and run to the bathroom not forgetting to snatch some clothes. I hear him sigh outside. I quickly take a shower putting on simple dark blue skinny jeans with a black tee. Leaving my hair flowing down my back.

When I got out I saw Luke texting someone with a frown on his face. Without saying anything, I quickly grabbed my phone and a hair tie and got out of the dorm. I called Alice to see if she was free and invited her for breakfast and she agreed. 10 minutes later, we entered a small café and ordered breakfast. She ordered a sandwich for herself while I ordered a salad. As usual. We both ordered some coffee too and then waited for our order.

"so, how is it going on between you and Luke? Did he apologize to you?" Alice asks taking a seat across from me.

" no he didn't. although I thought he was going to but I just shut him out." I reply.

Alice sat there with a confused look on her face. " what? I don't understand. Why did you shut him out?" she asks.

" I was angry I guess..." I trail off.

We were interrupted by the waiter as he came and placed our orders on our table. After he went away, Alice frowned looking at me.

" What?" I ask her. She sighed and replied,

" Emily, Luke is a good guy. He has gone through a lot in his past. I'm sure he didn't mean to shout at you. If he wants to apologize then you should let him."

I stayed quite for a moment, thinking of what Alice has said.

" you said he has gone through a lot in his past. Why? What happened to him?" I ask curiously.

" Emily, you don't know Luke as better as we all do. Sure you know many things about him like his favourite colour or food, but you don't know his history. You've known him for just a little above a month. You have to get to know him, Emily. You have to earn his trust and maybe he'll tell you."

I stay quiet, processing her words. I always thought that Luke had a perfect life. He didn't show any emotion other than happiness. He seemed so free. But I guess I was wrong to judge him like that. Hearing what Alice told me, I began thinking of what could have happened to Luke. I was feeling a little ashamed of myself. I called him my friend but I never bothered to ask him more about his life. I only knew some basic things, nothing else. I was filled with curiosity now. I wanted to find out more about Luke. I wanted to ask him about Maria. The girl whose name he chants in his sleep. To know more about him, I would have to talk to him. Also, I didn't even give him a chance to explain himself. I was being so selfish that I totally ignored him without even listening to him.

After a long silence, Alice speaks up.

" Think about what I've said, Ems. You should really talk to him."

I then reply," yes Alice, you're right. It was really selfish of me to shut him out. I 'll have to talk to him."

She smiles up at me and tells me that everything will work out. We then finish our food and go to her dorm. We chat for a little while and prepare for a test which is on Monday.

At the time of lunch, I return to my dorm. As I enter, I see Luke lying on his bed with headphones on. His eyes were closed. As I closed the door, He opened his eyes and they landed on me. He took out his headphone and just stared at me.

" hey" I say softly.

" hey" he replies, still looking at me.

"we need to talk" I say.

"Emily, I am sorry for yelling at you yesterday. I didn't mean it. It was just that I saw someone and lost it. I took out my anger on you. I am so sorry Ems. Please forgive me." He finishes. I go and sit beside him on his bet before replying,

"its okay Luke. I forgive you"

" really" he asks surprised.

"yeah. I talked to Alice today while breakfast and she told me that you gone through something bad in the past, though I don't know what it is, but I totally understand the feeling. I know we haven't known each other for a very long time and it will take time for us to trust each other completely. But you should know that if you want to talk, I am always here." I finish, giving him a small smile.

" wow... that was deep, but thanks for understanding Ems. I appreciate it. And you are right about the whole trusting each other thing, I will tell you when I am ready. But you shouldn't forget that whenever you want to talk about something, I will always be there for you too." He says smiling back.

I then do something which surprises us both. I hug him. For the past month we had shared side hugs or sling a hand over our shoulders, but we never hugged. This was the first time I was hugging him. At first he tensed up a bit but then he relaxed and slowly wrapped his arms around me, hugging me back. Warmth spread through my entire body. It felt so good to be in his arms. It was relaxing and comforting. It made me feel so warm inside making my stomach tie up in knots. And most importantly the hug made me feel something I hadn't felt in three years.

It made me feel safe.

Eventually we pulled away. Luke smiled at me. It was a real smile, not a smirk and it made my insides melt. " thanks, best friend." He says smiling at me.

"best friends?" I ask.

" yeah, aren't we best friends? Now that we support each other and all?" he says.

" yeah, best friends." I say confirming. It sounded weird though. But its better than just friends.

"okay" he says.

"okay" I confirm.

" I guess 'okay' will be our always." He says, smirking mischievously.

"Oh god, don't go all fault in our stars on me", I say.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE that book. It's the most beautiful thing I've read. I really want my Augustus Waters. He is the sweetest boy ever, though he doesn't exist, I wish he did.

" hey, you love that book. You told me yourself." He says.

" yes, I love that book and I know that you do too" I say smirking at him. Yup, Luke Collins likes to read books. Who knew he would be the one to read novels. But it's a hobby we both share. We love books and we have started reading them simultaneously. Though he made me swear upon my life to not to tell anyone about his hobby because it would ruin his 'bad boy reputation'. I can easily use this secret against him anytime to get what I want.

MUAHHAHAHA

I am so evil.

" do you wanna watch a movie?" Luke asks.

" sure, can we invite everyone too? We could have a movie night and they can stay over seeing you have on the largest dorms in the campus." I suggest.

" yeah sure, I'll call everyone and you can choose some movies to watch."

I nod and walk over to the set of movies we have. I choose The Avengers, Edge of tomorrow and X-men: first class.

I'm such a sucker for sci-fi and I love Robert Downey Jr. and Tom Cruise. They are the best.

10 minutes later......

we all are sitting in front of the TV putting in a horror movie. I and Alice protested because we wanted to watch The Avengers but the guys said its not called movie night without at least one horror movie so we had to agree. We decided to watch 'Mama'. I didn't have a problem with scary movies. In fact I actually like to watch them. I get scared but I don't stop watching it.

By the end of the movie, me and Alice are hiding underneath the blanket we were sharing. That was one scary movie. Literally. But I liked it, it was a new concept and theme and really fun to watch. but it was scary nonetheless We were both shaking while the guys were laughing. Eventually we calmed down and continued to put in 'Edge Of Tomorrow', I really needed some Tom cruise action to get my mind off of the scary movie.

Luke excused himself to go to the bathroom while the rest of the guy went to get something to eat. I and Alice were sitting alone now, waiting for them.

" where are they?" I ask, getting desperate.

Alice just shrugs saying they will be back in a minute. Suddenly, all the lights go out. It is s quie that I can literally hear my heart beat increasing. "boys?" Alice says, a hint of fear in her voice. " Luke? Cole? Alex? Justin?..... where are you guys" I call out getting scared. Then a loud thud is heard. And foosteps approaching us slowly.

Oh no! who is it? Maybe it's a kidnaper? Maybe a thief? Oh god it's a kidnapper isn't it. He is here to take us. Oh god nonononono... shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit . this cant be happening. Where the hell are the guys? How have they suddenly disappeared.

We se a silhouette approaching us slowly and painfully. First I think it is one of the guys but then a raspy sound is heard, " you both are going to come with me" the man says in a deep voice. I and Alice share looks of fear. " n-no w-who are you? What d-do y-you want-t?" we ask stuttering.

" I only want you ladies, and I am going to get what I want" the man says. I and Alice scream for help, tears running down both of our faces.

i don't want to die without meeting one direction.

Then the lights are turned on and we see the boy laughing on the floor. Justin, Alex and Cole are on the floor laughing their heads off. But the fourth one. Luke. Is wearing a mask. He was the man who was acting as the kidnapper. He was laughing so hard that I didn't see his mask. But when he turned around, I saw the mask was of a clown, a joker.

And that's when I screamed loudly and the panic attack started.Luke was wearing a clown mask. I have a phobia of clowns. I am not just scared. I am TERRIFIED of them. The first time my parents took me to the circus, I was 5. A clown came up to welcome us. His face was painted white with blood red lipstick which was smudged all over his lips. That was the first time I saw a clown and I literally ran away from the circus with my parents running after me. It took me two days to calm down completely. Since then I have had a serious case of clown-phobia.

I started breathing heavily. Tears were running down my face like water falls. Luke was the first one to notice that I am acting strange and he walks over to me with the mask still on. " STAY AWAY FROM ME!!!" I scream absolutely terrified and take steps back wards. My breathing was becoming uneven now. That's when Alex of all people realized I am having a panic attack.

"shit guys, it's a panic attack" Alex says. Alex is actually a psychology major. So I am sure he observed that I was getting scared and nearly fainting.

Alex comes by my side and hold me tightly in his lap." He's a clown. He is gonna get me. He'll get me. He is a clown" I was chanting repeatedly. " Dude remove your mask. She is scared of clowns" Luke immediately removes his mask and I relax just a little.

My breathing is still frantic. Alex is whispering soothing words to me. Rocking me back and forth in his lap." Hey Ems, calm down, Its not a clown, its Luke. There are no clowns around here. Ems calm down." He says in my ear. Alex being a psychology student, is able to calm me down. He knows what to say to someone who is panicking.

My breathing starts getting normal very very slowly. Alex is holding me tightly to him. Its very comforting to be in his arms. " Look at me Ems" Alex says. I slowly look to meet his eyes. " you are okay. No one is hear. You are perfectly safe Ems. Understand?" he asks. I nod, my breathing is normal now.

I look up to se Alice with worried eyes while the rest of the guys are watching me with guilt and worry." We are sorry Ems, we didn't know you were scared of clowns." Justin says guiltily. I force a smile towards them, telling them I'm okay. They all come up and I am enveloped in a group hug. When we part, I see that Luke is just standing there looking at me.

He probably thinks its his fault.

I walk up to him and then he starts speaking," I am sorry Ems. I didn't know. Its all my fault Ems. Please forgive me. I didn't mean to scare you. I'm so sorry Ems. I'm so sorry" he says. Looking down at the floor. Then I hug him again. He doesn't wrap his arms around me. When I pull apart, I see his shocked and guilty face.

" its not your fault Luke. You didn't know. Stop blaming yourself for it okay? Its not your fault" I say looking into his eyes.

He give me a small smile. And then hugs me. This is the first time that he has hugged me first. He wraps his arms tightly around me so that I am nuzzled into his neck. He nuzzles his face deep in my air and says,

"thank you".

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