Emily's POV

"I am anorexic."

I state closing my eyes. I don't want to keep this hidden anymore, not from Alex at least. Besides Luke, he is the only one who can probably understand me because of the field he is in. I did promise to tell him, earlier.

"You're serious Ems?" Alex asks and I open my eyes to see him looking at me with shock clear in his bright green eyes.

"Yes she is serious." Luke says.

"You knew?" Alex asks again but now looking at Luke who I am sure is nodding his head right now.

"Why wasn't I told about this?" he asks, his voice carrying a little anger and annoyance.

"She wasn't ready. She didn't even tell me, I just kinda found out." Luke says slowly. I sigh, thinking about that day just gets me down and talking about anorexia brings me down too. I don't want this. However, I feel like I deserve this.

Seeing other girls, with a perfect, beautiful body makes me feel ugly about myself. It makes me not want to eat, not want to gain any extra weight. Yes, Luke tells me I am beautiful, pretty, and gorgeous all the time but there is this one voice in my head that suppresses his voice and makes it hard to believe. Luke helps me eat and I am thankful for that but then that voice comes back and scolds me. Why did you eat two sandwiches? Don't you think one was enough? It taunts me every time.

I burry my face in my arms that I was using as a pillow. I take a deep breath, trying to keep it all together.

I feel bad for Luke. He doesn't deserve this. He doesn't deserve all this drama and having to look after me. He deserves a girl who is not so insecure, shy and conserved like me. He deserves someone like him, strong, brave, outgoing and fun. But he is stuck with a boring girl like me.

"Were you even planning on telling me, Emily?" Alex asks. I can't see as I have buried my face in my arms but I can hear the anger and the disappointment in his voice, all directed towards me.

"I- I was going...to but...I..." I tired to come up with a good reply but I didn't know what to say to him.

"Look guys, its really late in the night to discuss this. Alex, Emily is tired from all the holiday planning she has done, cut her some slack and let her rest. All of our classes are ending early tomorrow, you can come to our dorm and we will tell you everything." Luke says noticing my nervousness.

I owe him my life for saving my ass for like the millionth time.

There is a moment of silence until I hear a long sigh, probably Alex.

"Yeah, okay." He mutters.

The rest of the ride is spent in silence. The sleepiness that was once consuming me had just disappeared. I was restlessly laying down on the back seat with my eyes closed, thinking about how shitty I am.

After what seems like an eternity, the car stops. I hear one of the doors open and a cold wind fills the car sending a soft shiver down my spine.

"Thanks for the ride, good night." I hear Alex's voice and then the door shuts. As my eyes are closed, he must have assumed I am already asleep.

After a few more seconds of driving the car stops again but this time because, we have reached our destination. The engine stops and I hear Luke getting out of the car. The door on the side where my head was laying, opens and another strong wind gushes inside, slapping my face for being the secretive idiot I am.

I finally open my eyes and sit straight up in the seat. I see Luke bent down a little and with a surprised expression on his face. I guess he didn't know I was awake the whole time and was probably bending down to pick me up.

"You are awake." He states moving aside to let me get out of the car.

"Glad you noticed." I reply sarcastically. I get out of the car and wait for him to lock it up.

I take a quick look at the dark campus. Only a handful of street lamps are making the area look a little less scary other wise it would've looked really frightening at almost eleven in the night.

Luke stuffs the keys in his pockets and turns towards me. We look at each other for a moment before I cast my eyes down.

"Lets go." I say in a light whisper and start walking to the corridor. His footsteps catch up to me and we walk quietly, a hand wraps around my shoulders and I look at Luke who is giving me a tentative and careful smile. I give him a thankful look for the support and lean into his touch.

A few minutes later, we find ourselves at the end of the hallway and I open the door to our room. I flick on the lights and then rush to get some clothes. I pick up whatever I can find on the top of my bundle in the closet and enter the bathroom.

Once inside, I lock the door and change into my night suit. When I am done, I finally look in the mirror. My eyes look droopy and tired and my hair is a little messy from all day's work. I sigh and brush my teeth. I pick my hairbrush and start de-tangling my hair, tying it into a loose braid.

I step out of the bathroom and see Luke sitting on his bed. He turns to look at me when he hears the door open and he face turns worried. I ignore him and climb into my bed, desperate to sleep off my tiredness. I hear the bathroom door shut indicating that Luke's in there.

I sigh and roll over to my right side; I hate talking about my past and my anorexia. Its this constant nagging in my head, like the fear of loosing someone who is so close to you. There is a reason for why I don't like telling anyone I'm anorexic. Its because I will be judged.

People-whenever they meet a new person- an adjective always pops in their heads. It's the first impression they get when they meet someone. People will always judge, it's in their nature. I judged Luke when I first met him, I thought he was a player because that's the kind of impression I got from him, but until later, I found out that he was far from being a player.

As I slowly came to know more about Luke, I realized that he was not what he pretended to be in front of people he didn't know. He is kind, caring, compassionate and loving towards everyone he knows and trusts. Maybe at first when Luke met me, he would've thought of me differently because that's what we humans do. We judge a person without even knowing anything about them.

I am not afraid of being judged, no, I am afraid of loosing someone because he/she will see me differently when they learn something new about me.

I know its pathetic and that I'm being paranoid but I know how quickly someone's perspective of you can because of any quality or hobby of yours. I know people will say 'Hey I'm not gonna judge you.' But they will think something about you, positive or negative.

I am brought back from my thoughts when I feel the comforter being draped over me. The bed dips a little behind me and there is a little shuffling before an arm drapes around my waist. Luke pulls me closer until my back is touching his chest.

"You okay, pumpkin." He asks in a small whisper.

"I'm okay." I say.

"You sure about telling him?"

"No, not only him, I want to tell all of them."

...

Luke's POV

I've seen movies that deal with mental problems or depression. The Perks Of Being A Wallflower being one of them, which my sister had forced me to watch with her. She sobbed throughout the movie while I rubbed her back in order to comfort her. At the end of the movie, we were sitting in a pile of tissues and she fell asleep soon after the movie ended.

The movie didn't bother me as much and I always prefer the book to it, but it did make me admire all the people who are fighting a battle with themselves. How brave and strong they are and how they still manage to smile the next day even if they were crying the previous night.

Emily is one of them. She is the strongest person I've ever met. She is caring, kind and compassionate. She is fun loving, adventurous, a girl who loves travelling and cookies and is a tad bit crazy. Yes, she is insecure. Yes, she lets people get into her head sometimes. But she never gives up. She might shed some tears but she always stands up, ready to fight again.

Its shocking how deep I've fallen for her. I'm blind sided by her beauty and how amazing she is. How she puts everyone before her, always tending to them before paying attention to herself.

She would definitely belong to abnegation. The selfless ones.

Really Luke? After giving such an inspirational and awesome speech, you just had to add a Divergent reference to it. You can do no wrong can you?

Hey! It's a good book!

Whatever.

A knock brings me back to reality. I walk over to the door and open it revealing Alex. I give him a brief smile while he nods at me. I step aside and he lets himself in, he sits beside Justin who is sitting beside Emily on my bed. Cole and Alice are situated on the foot of the bed.

It's currently four in the evening and all of us are in mine and Emily's dorm. She wants to tell everyone the truth about her parents and also about her anorexia. I know that Alice knows about her parents but I don't think anyone else has any idea about them.

I situate myself beside Emily and grab her hand, settling it on my thigh. I give her a reassuring smile and she squeezes my hand. I squeeze back, letting her know that I'm here for her.

"So, I wanted to tell you guys something really important." Emily says.

"PLEASE DON'T TELL ME YOU ARE PREGNANT!" Alice shouts. From the position she and Cole are in, I am afraid she isn't getting squished. Cole is literally laying on top of her, both on their stomachs.

Emily blushes adorably and frowns at her. I can feel myself heat up at Alice's statement too.

That girl needs a filter between her brain and mouth.

"No, I wanted to tell you I am anorexic." She says in a low voice.

"WHAT?!" Alice shouts again and Cole falls off the bed. All of them look at Ems in shock. I give her hand another squeeze, telling her to get it out. Too late to back out now anyway.

That's how the next hour and a half passes. With everyone getting shocked and worried as Emily tells them everything. Alice, despite knowing about Emily's parents, shed some tears as she recounts the car crash. Cole listens attentively with a worried look on his face. Everyone remains quiet as Emily tells them everything about her past.

Even Justin gets a little teary eyed in between.

The only person who doesn't react in any way is Alex. He just sits there with a blank expression, giving nothing away. He listens everything but with a hint of hostility. That worries me because Alex isn't usually so conserved around us. Yes, he is a quiet guy but he is just as crazy as everyone when he is with us and he is just as close to Emily as I am.

A sense of proudness and happiness washes over me as I see my friends sitting in this room, of how easily they accepted Emily into their lives and how they all supported her and made her happy. When college started, they were the ones who made her feel comfortable and adjust to the surroundings while I was being a world-class douche to the entire homo sapien race.

However, what makes me prouder is seeing my girl, sitting here and facing all her fears. I know she is afraid of being judged and how she doesn't want to loose us, but, she also knows that she has to fight. Fight her anorexia. Fight her past. Fight her fears.

Because that's what Emily is, a fighter.

She doesn't shed a single drop of tear as she speaks. She bravely recites her story but wherever she wavers, I fill in. I hold her hand, rub her knuckles, letting her know that I am here for her and I will always be here for her, for my pumpkin.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Justin asks breaking the silence after Emily stops.

"I don't know. I didn't want you guys to look at me differently." Emily says looking down at our interlocked hands.

"We would never do that, Emily." Cole says softly.

"She doesn't think that." Alex retorts getting up. It's the first time he has spoken since he got here. He walks towards the door leaves, shutting it loudly behind him.

There were many things I didn't expect from Alex. Him being the most sensible and just a tad bit mature than all of us, I didn't expect him to ship Lemily beyond normalcy or plan our wedding along with Alice. I definitely did not expect him to walk out on Emily like this.

"He isn't upset with you Ems. He is more upset with himself." Alice says in an assuring voice. I turn back to look at Emily who has a broken expression on her face. She probably thinks it's her fault.

"Hey, Alice is right, I'll go talk to him, okay?" I say kissing her cheek. I nod towards the others and walk towards the door.

I grab my jacket and head out to find my all-knowing best friend. I don't go his dorm knowing he wont be there. Alex is not that type of the guy that locks himself in his room until he figures his brain out. He will most likely go somewhere calm like a park or something to think.

I find him on the bleachers of the football stadium on the campus. He has his feet propped up on the seat in front of him and has earplugs on. He sees me coming and removes his earplugs but remains in the same position.

"Look who's listening to One Direction." I mock sitting beside him.

"Shut up." He says, a smile breaking onto his face.

"Oh yeah no, you were listening to Justin Bieber weren't you?" he looks at me for a few seconds before we both burst out laughing. We calm down after a few minutes and sit quietly for a few moments.

"I knew something was up, you know." Alex says. "I noticed her eating habits, how she would try to throw the food on her plate away and dodge anyone offering her food. I should've acted upon it sooner. Her parents, I had no idea. But, anorexia, I should've talked to her sooner." He sighs.

"Its okay, man. Emily wouldn't have told anyone herself, she is like that. She doesn't want anyone to leave her because of her problems that's why she keeps it to herself." I say placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I am sorry for walking out like that. I was just angry with myself for not paying much attention to her. I care for her you know, she is like the cute little sister I never had. I just feel terrible for not confronting her sooner." I smile at him.

"I know you did not mean to come out upset but Emily thinks that you are mad at her so it shouldn't be me you have to apologize to." I say chuckling.

"I know. I'll apologize to her tomorrow."

We sit quietly for a few minutes. It's already dark and a little colder. The stadium is eerily quiet and the only thing illuminating our surroundings is the moonlight giving the stadium a creepy touch.

"She makes you happy, doesn't she? I never saw you this happy, not even with Maria." Alex says with a smile on his face.

"Yes she does." I say, looking up at the moon. "She makes me the happiest person in the world." I sigh. Yes, Emily can be a handful sometimes but she is still Emily. My beautiful Emily.

"Aww look at you, getting all dreamy about her. You're whipped." Alex mocks.

"I am whipped and I am not even ashamed to admit it." I say smiling.

"I'm happy for you, Luke." He says. "I'm happy that you finally found someone as amazing as her." I smile back at him.

"Well its getting late and we all have early classes tomorrow for some stupid reason." True. Classes on Tuesday usually begin at 12 but all classes are starting early tomorrow. Well it's the last week before the quarterly exams so I guess the teachers want as much time for revision they can get.

We both bid goodbye to each other and I start retreating to my dorm. Walking in the dark is creepy. Its like someone is constantly following you but when you turn around there's nobody there. The last thing I want is to turn around and find Slender man standing there.

Gosh, that guy gives me the creep.

I enter the dorm to find Justin and Emily sitting on the bed with a book in front of them. Emily is eating a burrito while asking Justin questions on something related to history of France. History geeks. What is making me happy is that even though everyone came to know about Emily's anorexia just a few hours ago; they have already started making an effort to help her.

Justin spots me first and smiles brightly. Emily turns around and spots me too with a small, uncertain smile.

"Hey man, Cole and Alice left early, they had to get up early tomorrow so I thought I'd keep her company and also brush up for the test tomorrow." He says walking over to me.

"Thanks man, you have to get up early too you know."

"No problem, I'll still be on time even if I get only two hours of sleep." He says laughing. I join him and he leaves after bidding us good night. I turn around to look at Emily who is walking towards me.

"Can I have a hug?" she asks. I soften at her words and pull her to my chest.

"Of course you can, pumpkin." I say holding her close to me.

"Are you okay?" I ask her after a couple of minutes. She nods into my chest mutely and tightens her hold on me. I know she is still worried about Alex.

"Alex isn't mad at you, Ems. He is mad at himself for not taking care of you." I say again taking her face in my hands. Her hazel brown eyes search mine for a few moments before she nods again. I attach my lips to her soft ones in a long meaningful kiss. Man, her kisses are toxic like drugs, I am addicted to them.

She gives me a smile when we part and then a yawn escapes her lips.

"Lets get to bed, shall we?" I say chuckling. We both change into our nightclothes and lay down on the bed. I hold her against me like I do every night, cherishing the moment. After a few minutes, Emily changes her position, getting out of my arms and laying on her stomach.

I decide not to pull her back to me and let her get comfortable; I close my eyes trying to sleep. However, a few seconds later, I hear shuffling and open my eyes to see Emily in a new position, on her side facing away from me. She keeps shuffling and changing her position restlessly for the next few minutes.

I prop my head on my hand and watch her squirming in the bed. Finally, she turns and faces me with her eyes still open. I smirk at her, watching her surprised reaction when she saw I was awake.

"I cant sleep." She states. Of course, I noticed that.

"Why? What do you wanna do then?"

"I don't know. I don't want to do anything but do something at the same time." I sigh and wrap an arm around her again. I know she is stressed about everything that happened today, its evident from the frown line on her forehead.

"Wanna play the guitar?" I ask her. That's the only thing that can cheer her up at times like these. Her guitar is her get away. She values that thing more than she values Chris Evans.

I see her face light up instantly and a beautiful smile breaks onto her face. Shit, my heart just skipped a beat or maybe a thousand beats.

"One condition though." She says. I raise my eyebrows at her, telling her to continue. Her next words cause me to smile along with her.

"You'll sing with me." And that's how the next hour goes, with us singing songs and taking turns to play the guitar. With every passing moment, I find myself falling deeper and deeper for her. We keep on singing song after song before Emily finally gets tired and ready to drop anytime.

It hits me like an electric shock as I come to the realization that I am, in fact, falling in love with this amazing girl.

................................................................................................................................................

Its a little boring. I don't know.

Thank you all so much for reading this far.

Love ya!

Bye!