It's movie night; you and Yoongi make popcorn, and your brother, Andy, gets out the strawberry licorice sticks and chocolate-covered raisins.

The lights are low in the living room because you love watching movies in the semi-dark to feel like being in a movie theater. Your brother always gets a kick out of it, and Yoongi, more often than not, always gave in to your brother.

Andy reclines his chair slightly, as they do at fancy movie theaters, and settles in with his bowl of popcorn, a soda, and a side dish of chocolate-covered raisins within reach.

You sit behind your brother's chair. He always had the front row for movie night, especially when it was his favorite movie.

Sitting on the couch beside Yoongi, your legs tucked under you as you hold the bowl of popcorn, he puts one arm around your shoulders.

Wearing white shorts and a soft pink sleeveless crop top, Yoongi's arm feels warm across your shoulders, and you snuggle closer. You love movie night and the time spent with the two men you love the most. Yes, you finally admitted to yourself that you may have fallen in love with Yoongi. You think.

Yoongi is wearing a white T-shirt and his favorite track pants, black with a wide stripe down the sides. There's something endearing about how he wears them. He seems so comfortable and relaxed that the hard edges of stress around his face disappear, plus he looks so undeniably cute in them. He loves those pants so much that he has several pairs in black and navy with a white stripe.

Throughout the movie, you notice, out of the corner of your eye, that Yoongi keeps sneaking glances at you. At your brother's favorite part in the movie, Yoongi suddenly stands and takes your hand, pulling you up with him. You smile questioningly as you willingly go with him.

You both have watched this movie a million times with your brother and know it word for word. You glance back at your brother and notice a subtle hint of a smile on his face. He wouldn't be smiling during the secret agents and criminal fight scene. He is usually riveted to the screen when that action scene takes place.

You squint your eyes. Why is your brother smiling? His eyes cut from you back to the television. His face returns to the solemn expression he usually has during this part. Smiling, you shake your head, wondering what he is up to.

You go with Yoongi as he crosses the living room, holding your hand. With a gentle pull, he stops just inside the threshold of your bedroom. Taking you in his arms, his lips meet yours, and no words are spoken. This is what you wanted, what you longed for, his embrace, his kiss. The beating of your heart races, and you feel his heart beat in tandem with yours.

Timidly at first, you desire to run your tongue over his bottom lip. Do it, your mind says, and your body obeys. You have seen his bottom lip in so many pouts, silently begging to be kissed. Slowly, your tongue softly sweeps across his lip.

He seems hesitant at first. Regretting your boldness, you're about to pull away to apologize when his tongue glides softly across your lips before tangling with yours. It was a sensual fight for dominance and pleasure.

Feeling his arms draw you closer as he deepens the kiss, your hand goes through his hair to rest at the back of his head, pulling his kisses closer.

The next thing you know, he pulls away, and without a word, he gazes into your eyes and licks his lips, his eyes smoldering with unfulfilled desire. He lets out a breath and then walks away, leaving you leaning on the door frame in your darkened bedroom. You try to catch your breath as your heart races with the passion he ignited.

What happened? Why did he pull away? You look around the doorway. Your brother is still zoned into the movie. Looking past him and straight through to the kitchen, you see Yoongi washing the dishes at the kitchen sink.

Walking up behind him, you gently lay your arm across his back, your hand resting on his shoulder, and you softly lean into him. He moves out from under your arm and steps to the side. With his hands in the dishwater, he finishes washing a glass, rinsing it, and setting it in the dish drainer without a word.

"Yoongi, what's wrong?" You feel a pain in your chest, right where your heart lives.

"Nothing." He doesn't look at you as he pulls the plug and stares into the sink as the dishwater empties down the drain.

"Why did you pull away from me twice now?" Your voice is gentle, but with a slight tremble, you ask, "Why? Yoongi, have I done something wrong?" A few seconds pass, but it feels like a thousand minutes before he replies.

"You love me, don't you?" he might as well have asked if you liked the rain. He came across as so distant, confusing you. It's like his emotions have shut down. Was this your fault, something you've done?

"You love me, don't you, Lilly?"

"Of course I do." Emotionally bewildered, you try to sound confident and reassuring. But even you heard the break in your voice.

"Well, don't." His voice is cold, and his face is devoid of emotions. It scares you. He has never been this way with you before.

You step back from him, hurt that he would say such a thing. "I, I don't understand." Your body begins to shake, and you feel like a vise is tightening around your chest.

Thinking he was ready and healed enough be in love again, he wanted to share his heart and body with you tonight.  He had already spoken to Andy hoping to get any indication from him if you would be receptive to the idea of being his girlfriend. Andy told him to go ahead and ask and if that was what you both wanted he was okay with it.

He had fallen deeply in love once before and still has the scars from his heart being open and vulnerable, only to be left feeling burned alive and heartbroken. With you, he thought he wanted more, but suddenly, he was overwhelmed with fear of making another mistake. He decided it was best for his own sake to shut down emotionally until he figured this out.

Kissing you and you swiping your tongue over his lips sent a surge of desire through him, taking him momentarily by surprise at the depth of it. Feeling he was about to lose control he stepped away. 

He turns to face you, his eyes shimmering with tears of doubt. "I can't feel this way, not with you. It'll ruin everything."

"Oh my gosh, why are you saying this? You don't want to feel what? Love? All we did was kiss." Yet silently you were longing to be skin to skin, you thought your relationship had progressed that far. Had you read all the signs wrong? It wouldn't be the first time.

So, I wasn't wrong about him being hesitant. But he pulled me aside and kissed me. I didn't initiate this. You're hurt and confused by his actions and his words. You both have past scars that run deep and were taking your relationship slow. Did you overstep an invisible boundary when you kissed him like you did?

He steps to you, gently kissing your lips before uttering the words that broke your heart. "I, I'm sorry, I can't do this."

Your fingers gently touch your lips where his had been, your world crashing down around you.

He leaves, stopping long enough to fist bump your brother who looks at him befuddled. You hear Yoongi clearing his throat as he walks out your front door.

You repeat what he said in your head, 'He can't do this?' What does that even mean? You can't bring yourself to call you lovers, but everything seemed to be going in that direction.

You weren't rushing the relationship because you both have been hurt before.

With a deep sigh of regret you lean against the storm door and watch him pull out of the driveway.

Angry at himself for being a coward, he pulls out of the driveway, berating himself. He wonders if you will ever forgive him, let alone understand why he felt he had to run. Was it to save himself or to save you from him?

Returning to the living room, you ruffle your brother's hair as he watches the final scene.

"Are you ready for bed when this is over?" You keep your voice light as you try to hide the hurt, but usually he sees through to your heart.

He doesn't understand why Yoongi left, he was suppose to ask you to be his girlfriend tonight. Yoongi had asked his permission to take your courtship one step further and he was excited for you. But now he's worried. He knows Yoongi cares deeply for you. Yoongi told him so.