This is just somthing Ricky 'horror' Olson posted on tumblr last year in a post called ' I see you' and I dont know I feel like in a way its like whats going on in Kellin's mind (in my story) [well before I skipped ahead bc in this chapter he's well.. You'll see]

"Now that I have the answers I was looking for all along, I can't help but to see myself in a different light. A place where everything is black and white and there are no shades of gray in between. It's set in stone, and it's now impossible to go back and un-see the truth. This is who I have been all along, buried beneath the facade of who I thought I was. I want to believe my lies. All of them. I want to think that this doesn't change anything, but the truth is: it does. It changes the entire way I see myself- I am a disease; a slow eating cancer. This is the truth. And this will never change. This is who I have kept hidden from myself all of these years- so subconsciously at work that I couldn't see it for myself.

Maybe monsters are real, but I don't have to think about them like everyone else does because, deep down underneath it all, they're just like me."

Except in my story Kellin's mind is getting better and Vic is showing a positive not a negative.

*Vic pov*
I stumble as I put my shoes on, luckily Kellin is there to hold me up.

"Wait a minute, you still have to sit through the opening act" Kellin jokes.
It's been about two weeks since Kellin's mental brake down, his friends haven't been talking to him and currently that seems to be the only thing holding him back.

Besides that I feel like this is the happiest Kellin has been and I'm truly happy to see him like this. I stopped telling Kellin those ten things to look forward to or just those ten things I would tell him, because Kellin is better and doesn't need ten things to keep him going anymore.

After school today I went to Kellin's place and now we are on our way to see Green Day live.

It's also my birthday,which had Kellin trying to make me a cake and throwing flower onto my face, I think it was just an excuse for me to change my shirt.

"You know if you were to tell me I'd see GreenDay live a few years ago I would laugh in your face" I say and Kellin kisses my cheek before opening the door.

"But if I knew you two years ago I would've tried to make this moment happen sooner" he says closing the door behind me.

"Oh would you, really?" I question as I get into the passenger seat and he gets into the drivers seat.

"If we were friends" Kellin admits as he starts the car, "I wish we were, I would've smiled a real smile sooner" he adds in a soft whisper.
My parents called me a few days ago and they seem to be doing well and my family has made our way to middle class. my mom and dad are apparently home more now but I basically live in Kellin's room.. In that way and others, if you know what I mean.

Mike came over a few times to play video games, Kellin says he still doesn't mind. But I do. All I want to do is push Kellin against the wall and kiss him but then I had to hear Mike yelling at the tv a floor under us making me lose all temptation. Kellin looked at me showing sympathy when really I should've looked at him

But that was yesterday right now I'm next to the person I love, one of his hands in mine, his fingers interwind with mine, his other hand on the steering wheel driving off to the moment I've only dreamed of.

He parks the car and he turns to look at me and looks me dead in the eyes, he looks serious.
"Did you bring the tickets?"
I think about it and then start freaking out I put my hands in my pockets, my jacket pockets, my jeans, I take my shoes off. Kellin starts laughing.

"Put your shoes back on, I have them" he says waving the tickets in front of my face.

"So not funny" I say putting my shoes back on,
"I knew you'd be too excited to remember these, plus you don't know how concerts work" Kellin states.

"It still wasn't right for you to scare me" I mumble

"I'm sorry, don't hate me" he says I feel his breath on my shoulder and I turn my head, his face right in front of mine. he presses his lips to mine and starts moving them, I move mine and then slowly open my mouth and he lets his tongue in, I moan lightly and put my hands at the back of his head keeping him right there.

He backs out a few seconds later to catch his breath and I catch mine.

"U-um now we don't want to miss anything" he says as he takes the keys and puts them in his pocket and he opens his door. Before I can open my door it's opened for me and I get out.

"You're the birthday boy" Kellin says with a smile
"And you're younger then me" I state and Kellin scoffs at me
"Well at least I'm currently taller by an inch or two" he mumbles, I roll my eyes but I take his hand, he uses the other to close the car door and then take out his keys to lock it.

"And because the tickets were a Christmas gift, and the cake wasn't a gift, even though you took it as one, your gift is anything you want from the merchandise booth!" Kellin announces happily as we start walking to the line.

"You don't need to do that, that's so sweet of you, but you don't need to spend that kind of mon-"

"Vic we are past this, I'm spending my money on what I want, and I want to buy you stuff, I live for the smile on your face and this is a day I want you to remember, we are past all the bullshit and the arguments" Kellin says straightforward cutting off my sentence, "I love you" he adds in a softer tone

"I love you too" I say and I tighten my grip on his hand. Kellin says he lives for my smile, I live for his happiness.

We get in line and Kellin gives the guy our tickets and he scans them and gives them back and we walk right in, tons of people walking around, tons of food tons of merchandise and the doors to the actual place where all the chairs are and the stage.

"Okay merchandise now or later?" Kellin asks taking me out of my amazement, "now" Kellin says with a small laugh as he leads me over. I glance over all the shirt and go for the black one with all the members on it and the tour dates on the back. Kellin then tells me to cover my eyes and he covers my ears as he asks for something else, well I'm guessing that's what he's doing. he removes his hands from my ears and I open my eyes.
"thank you" he says to the lady as she gives him a bag, "enjoy the show" she says happily, smiling at us.

"So why did I close my eyes?" I ask and he smiles widely at me
"you'll see after the show" he says as he leads me to the entrance to the magical seating area and he guides me down the stairs. All the way down to the first row. I stand there next to Kellin in shock.

"You, wait what" I grab the tickets from his hands and glance over them, "how did I, how did I not know" I state

"You can't read tickets yet, you aren't a pro" Kellin jokes as I put them back in his hands and sit next to him.

"Don't shows usually have a pit?" I ask
"Not all my young son, not all shows"
"Kellin don't call me your son, oh god please don't.. incest isn't a kink of mine" I whisper the last part in his ear and he laughs

"I know Vic, I know, happy birthday" he says and he quickly kisses my cheek.
"I just didn't want to call you a grasshopper" he adds softly and I feel his hand go on my thigh and I keep it there, putting my hand over his.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"That was the best night of my life" I say to Kellin as we get into his car.
The show was amazing, they were so close to my face. Kellin and I sang along and it was just like we do in the car but they were in front of us, it was a dream come true and I can't believe it actually happened. I never thought I'd ever even get the money to see the smallest band ever play live but yet I saw Green day... Fucking Green day.

"I'm happy to hear that, it was mine too" Kellin says with a smile.
"So what did you secretly buy?" I ask and he takes out a book from the bag
"Just the tour program and poster so you'll remember our best night forever" he says, I take the book from his hand and he passes me the bag and I take it holding it all close to me.

"I love you, I love you, I love you, fuck it Kellin don't start the car" I say as he turns the key

"Why not?" He asks

"I need to give you a hug" I say and I put everything in the bag and put it on the floor between my legs and I lean over and wrap my arms tightly around Kellin and he puts his arms around me.

"I love you too...times three" Kellin says making me laugh a little.

I wish tonight didn't have to end.

A/N: THREE CHAPTERS LEFT
oh and I don't know if you guys care but.. TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY