"Please don't do it! Please! Think of me, every time that you think of doing it, think about me. You can't leave me! Even if you think that no one loves you, remember that I LOVE YOU. I will always be there for you, but you can't leave me."

I never thought that I would be saying these words to my best friend.

She was always hiding things from me. I've never met her parents, the ones that she says hate her. She always found a way to hide things from me, even when I knew something was wrong.

Two weeks earlier, she told me that her family would be moving out of state in December. I cried. She didn't. Instead she told me about her mother being drunk, and the stepfather that could never fill the hole that her dad should have filled. The dad that died of cancer when she was little. The dad that I know that she misses and that causes her pain, even though she doesn't talk about him.

She was angry.

I was crying harder than I ever had in my life.

I didn't know that I would cry harder.

Two weeks after that call, she texts me.

H: I don't feel good

Me: How so?

H: I don't have anything to say except I don't feel good

Me: You sure? I want to make sure that you're ok

H: Will you promise not to tell?

Me: Always

H: I wanna die

Me: Do you want to talk about anything else to get your mind off things?

H:Can I kill myself

Me: No, not while I'm still alive to help you.

H: Please.

During that call, two weeks before, she told me that she had tried. Multiple times. She was stopped before using the rope, and the pills only caused her to throw up. She also told me that she had tried to get help before.

Now she was looking to me for help.

And I didn't know what to do.

So I told her that I loved her for the first time.

That worked, for a while. Until the texts. I could barely breathe I was crying so hard. So many thoughts were rushing through my head; Can I get to her in time? Should I call 911? Is she actually going to try? What will I do if she does? I'm only fifteen! I don't know what to do.

It has been over half a year. She is still alive.

Every time I see her, I tell her that I love her. She has been through so much, and I found that saying those three words is all that I can do to help someone who denies that they need help.

Since then, she has opened herself up, and become much happier. She has let a boy into her life, and actually smiles (but only when she thinks no one is looking). She thought that nobody loved her.

But I do.