AN: Finally a new chapter! 😥 Once again, the one that lacks its due time... I apologise for the wait. This chapter will be longer and the next one will be out at the end of the week. I hope you will like this one. Enjoy! 😊

"So, that's the whole plan once again. Did everyone understand?" Erwin said, scanning all the people in the room, scarcely a handful of SC, who will know about the real plan.

Each of them nodded - Levi, Petra, Hange, Moblit, Auruo, Eld, Gunther and Eren. The only people he could completely trust. The only people crazy enough to trust his wits.

He couldn't explain with words how he would feel if he betrayed that trust.

However, everyone was aware of that possibility.

They just didn't want to say it until it became too late. 

Then Erwin remembered all those people he had called off. All the squads and people in it who had been gathered here, listening to his every word and once again dedicating their lives and hearts. 

They dwell in nescience. They dwell in expectation. 

They will be the most betrayed people in the world today. 

And he couldn't change that.

"So in order to pass, we will have to use everyone as a shield and then..." Eren started but he couldn't finish the sentence.

"That's right," Erwin said and closed his eyes. "You will have to turn into a titan eventually so it would be best to do so when we get deep into the forest and become surrounded by other titans. Then, we will continue."

"Are you sure Eren will have time to heal?" Petra asked, turning to Hange who fixed her glasses with a grin.

"Since his tooth had started growing out around an hour after Levi kicked it out, I'm positive he will recover in a few hours at most."

"Hm..." Petra nodded, glancing at Eren while Levi glared at Hange for mentioning it after so long. 

Eren smiled nervously as if being reminded how it felt, unconsciously rubbing his cheek underneath which the above mentioned tooth was. 

"Eren showed us how he improved and how strong he is," Eld said, patting Eren's back. "I trust him and his abilities."

"But what if he suddenly grows out a colossal arm like a week ago?" Auruo asked and everyone in Levi's squad tensed, remembering well that evening.

Apparently, Titan's powers activated on desire to do or accomplish something. Whether it is big as protecting a friend or small as reaching for a fork on the ground.

When Eren had transformed, everyone had panicked, jumping out and drawing their swords on instinct. Everyone but Levi who stood calmly, as if he had been standing on nails all the time, waiting when something like that would occur.

When the shock dispersed, they all quickly rushed to Eren and started helping him out. Auruo and Eld were pulling at his hands while Petra, Gunther and Levi kept cutting and cooling the flesh with buckets of water every time it would release hot steam.

As harrowing as it had been, it was worth it. They set him free just when Hange came running and laughing in delight and excitement, followed by Moblit who begrudgingly took the title of mother hen every now and then around her. 

Unfortunately, to Hange's genuine demise of spirit, the arm had soon steamed out, leaving almost nothing to inspect. 

It left a lot of days to work in pursuing a good result, but almost nothing was successful. However, they had concluded a few things - a string will be a trigger, feelings as well and an innate sense of danger and helplessness. 

The latter couldn't be simulated so they let it be. In the end, if the need would come, they would know if they were completely right. But they prayed that for now, such situations wouldn't be.

"If he does that, we will have to knock him out. Do you agree, Eren?" Hange asked and Eren tensed up.

"I... if it is the only way, then I won't be mad," he said. Evident it was that he was not so comfortable with the notion, but as he said - if it would be the last option, he wouldn't object.

"Alright. As far as I see you all understood this. Do you have any questions?" Erwin asked seriously.

"No, Commander."

Others agreed and Erwin nodded. "Then I wish us all a good luck and may this mission pass with minimal surprises and losses."

Let it be, everyone silently wished.

.

.

.

"Petra, may I speak with you?" Auruo asked when he approached Petra who petted her horse's man thoughtfully.

"Hm? Of course, is everything alright?" Petra asked, turning to him.

Auruo bit his lip, feeling a weird sense of deja vu. On the last mission, he came here like this too. Then, it was on different grounds and his motives were different.

He even seemed like a different person to himself back then.

How was it possible for someone to change so much?

"I wanted to know, are you happy?" Auruo managed to say.

Petra blinked then smiled at him endearingly. Her heart warmed, knowing her friend was there for her. He cared, he thought her situation is still to be cautious even though she obviously showed her happiness. 

"Believe me, I am truly happy. Levi and I love each other genuinely," Petra said and smiled. "Thank you for worrying about me."

"... Is it really so?" Auruo urged, once again wondering if he's being jealous or selfish again. Is he doing this for himself or for her, even though the only thing in his conscious mind is her sake?

Is he deceiving himself? Is he still not better than he had been? 

The possibility made him sick. 

"Yes... Auruo, is everything alright? Why are you worried so much?" Petra asked worriedly, putting a gentle hand on Auruo's shoulder.

Auruo tensed at the night contact, but managed to ease himself quickly.

"It's not that... I don't see how you are happy. It's just..." he started, tearing his gaze from her face. 

He couldn't look at her properly. He feared she would see his pain and he didn't want that. Let her remain oblivious like she has always been - she will not be laden by his feelings. He didn't want her to feel guilty now of all times when she finally, finally found her reason and her future.

"We've been close friends for so long. How many years exactly? I can't remember," he said and bit his lip.

"I've watched over you like an older brother and... it just..." he continued and this time looked at wide-eyed and still worried Petra, forcing a smile. "I can't believe my little sister grew up and doesn't need me anymore."

Amber eyes narrowed to their normal size and a sweet laugh was heard. Lifting her head up, Petra smiled at Auruo, engulfing him in a hug. 

"I'm not pushing you away, Auruo. You will always be my dear friend and older brother. Family, even if it isn't blood-related, should never be neglected. So don't worry, you will never be replaced."

Ache making his breath tremble inaudibly, Auruo hugged Petra back, two tears trickling down his face. They had fallen into her hair, weightless and unfelt. 

Better be that way, better be in such pain.

"Petra, Auruo, are we coming?" 

Auruo froze, thanking the heavens that his back was turned to a man behind.

On the other hand, Petra smiled at him while she was still hugging Auruo. By the shine in her eyes, one could surmise the extent of her love since the sole voice was enough to make her that way.

Pulling away with an apologetic expression aimed at Auruo, Petra looked at Levi who had raised his eyebrow. Not in irritation, jealousy or anger - but in genuine bewilderment.

"Is everything alright?" he asked, glancing at Auruo who was looking at the ground.

Biting his tongue, Levi knew he couldn't ask Auruo anything. It would be inappropriate since he knew his pains and struggles, even though his question would be asked out of true concern.

For he knew how he felt. He himself almost sank into despair because of it.

He only hoped it would not distract him from this mission. 

It would to some extent, but he hoped not to that point something bad happens.

And by something bad, everyone knew what it actually meant.

"Everything's alright," Petra asked and looked at Aurio who raised his head on time so she wouldn't see his hitherto state. 

"... Alright. Then, shall we go? The gates will open soon."

Auruo smiled, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. 

Open the gate and run through it. Run away from this place, be at rest just this once. Don't think, don't dwell - be free of your pain.

"Coming," Petra nodded, taking the rains of her horse. When she reached Levi, she turned.

"Are you coming, Auruo?"

"Yes, yes, just to get my horse. Carry on without me, I'll come in a minute," he said cheerfully, like he always had.

Smiling and shaking her head, Petra followed Levi out, leaving Auruo to drop the smile and clench his fists to his eyes.

Close the gates again with me on the other side. Don't let me in to feel this anymore. Close them forever.

And then, fear swallowed him. Gloomy thoughts were too much at this moment. And then, he realised what he actually asked for. His stomach did a flip.

Don't think, it is not worth your life, he repeated, but still unconvinced. 

It will pass.

But when? When?

Will he live up to see its end?

.

.

.

"What was that?" Levi asked. "Is Auruo hurt or?" 

Anxious feeling built up in his stomach. He hoped Auruo didn't tell Petra anything of how he felt - it would do no good to anyone now. Now, when they mustn't focus on anything else but mission and how to survive. 

By Petra's face, he could at least blow away half of worries. She didn't seem down or anything of that sort. In fact - she was only dwelling in worry she naturally feels towards the others.

"Well, Auruo told me how he thinks he won't be important to me like he was anymore," Petra sighed. "He has always been seeing me as his younger sister who he cares for and now he is confused of how quickly I managed to become someone who doesn't need to be cared for."

A small smile formed on her lips. "He worries I grew up too soon."

Like an older brother, huh? Levi thought. There is nothing worse than being deemed as that but loving her enormously.

"Well, he still has to get used to it, I guess," he said. Which wasn't so untrue after all.

"I know, but still... My father got used to it sooner than him. I just don't get why he is worried to that extent and it worries me as well. I fear for him, but I don't know why," Petra said, looking down at the stoned street they were walking on. 

Their talk couldn't be heard by anyone but them due to the whole buzz caused by civilians shouting and greeting them, together with sounds of horse's groves.

You don't know why, but you feel the real reason, even though your mind doesn't recognize it still, Levi thought.

He wanted nothing more than all the shadows being unravelled. Auruo's love, Petra's obliviousness, his own past, his friends he still hadn't talked about - Farlan and Isabel. All of it was hidden and desperately pounding at the gates of their serenity, making cracks in it. 

Pezra feels it, Auruo feels it and Levi feels it. Each in their own way, conscious or not.

He wondered if it will happen soon or will many years pass. Because it would be impossible for it to not happen. 

Nothing ever stays hidden for too long.

Musings continued as they jumped on their horses and when Auruo came running. He joined them and they came to spot Eld, Gunther and Eren and rode towards them. They had started talking and cracking jokes until it was the time to enter the main street. They had halted, waiting for everyone to gather before they could continue.

It was the time when many family members took their chance to approach their children, siblings, friends and lovers and have a private word.

Maria and her parents and Eld's mother approached Eld, Maria handing him a small wreath of red strings and lillies to wear around his wrist for luck. His mother kissed him on both cheeks, making him promise he will come back. Maria's parents greeted him proudly, hoping he would come back and silently planning to ask him to quit in the military after his and Maria's wedding.

Gunther's old parents came to him holding onto each other. Holding back tears, he flashed a grin and got off his horse, hugging them. They had only him, so he knew how hard this was for them. He knew they worried, but had faith that everything will be fine and that he will come back. He promised them so once again.

Auruo's five brothers and parents happily came to greet him and his heart felt alive again. He hugged them and spoke lighthearted, feeling like he was a man dying in a desert and suddenly finding his salvation. He was reminded he was loved by his dear family. The pain of a broken heart may never mend, but at that time, he knew their love would help him.

Levi observed them with interest and curiosity. Families... so much love. Soon, will he and Petra have something close to it? Will he have something like that?

"Petra! Petra!"

Widening her hitherto sad eyes, since she hadn't seen her father anywhere, Petra turned in the direction of his voice and jumped off the horse. 

"Father!" she wrapped her arms around his neck and they hugged tightly. 

"My little girl," he said before begrudgingly pulling away. He looked at her from head to toe and his eyes softened.

"Every time you go, I feel like it is your first time outside the Walls and can't help my worries. No matter how strong you are," he smiled, petting her hair.

Giggling, Petra took his hands. "Don't worry father, I will come back as always. And even if I don't manage to be strong, there are people who will help me."

"Is that so?" Jonathan said and raised his brows. Looking up at Levi, his eyes narrowed.

Shifting in his saddle, Levi bowed his head slightly. "Mr. Ral."

"You can drop the formalities, son. In the end, as much as I think you have to make more amends, we will become a family. Isn't that so?" Jonathan said and gave him a sharp smile full of amusement and a slight warning.

"Dad, don't now," Petra whispered, tapping his forearms.

"What to not? This one made you suffer and what is even more alarming - himself as well. Someone who degrades themselves often thinks only of their own pain and how miserable they are, without noticing how they affect people that love them," Jonathan stated. He looked at Levi significantly before turning to Petra and squeezing her hands gently.

"I only want what is best for you. I have to be in charge of threatening him, so he will not forget," he said and grinned, but not to dismiss his hard words. He meant every single one and Petra, and especially Levi, was aware of that.

"Thank you, dad. But believe me that we are alright. Though, of course I can't stop you from making the order with your future son-in-law," she chuckled at the last one, making Levi blush slightly.

"Petra," he warned in embarrassment. "Don't betray your Captain."

Flashing him a teasing grin, Petra winked. "Of course, Captain."

Jonathan sighed, feeling like he had just now seen his daughter fully complete. Delight was immeasurable, pride just as big, but somehow a knot in his stomach regarding this day didn't ease.

He was afraid. So afraid that happiness would prove to be transient once again. That she will face grief and despair, that he will lose her now, when she finally has the bright future in front of her mind full of imagination and faith. 

A signal was heard, indicating they should climb on their horses. Families quickly hugged their soldiers, whispering final words, maybe their last to them. 

Petra and Jonathan looked at each other. 

"It's alright, dad. I will come back, don't worry," Petra said, hugging Jonathan tightly as if she wasn't sure herself of her words.

"Be careful, my little girl," Jonathan whispered and kissed his daughter's head. "And come back alive."

But even when they parted, when he saw her waving and standing in line beside her Captain and her true love, when she gripped the rains and swung them, when they ran past in full faith in each other, Jonathan couldn't help but think of how bad he wanted to make her stay.