Toothbrush, socks, jeans, shorts, shirts, paint, paint brushes, easel, shoes-

"Don't think so hard, dear," his mother commended, breaking the silence the six of them had been maintaining for some time. "You'll break a blood vessel.

Collier rolled his eyes and Sarah laughed.

It was weird, he thought as he looked around, having all of them in his bedroom going through his stuff.

Emerson was working with his art supplies, trying to fit as many jars of paint he could in one box. Sarah was right next to him, at Collier's closet, folding his clothes and boxing them using a system that would make them easier to unpack, or so she said.

Next to her, was his mother, sorting through his night stand with a garbage bag in one hand and an open box sitting on Cole's bed. On the other side of the room, Collier's father sorting through the bookshelves, collecting the books that looked most worn, and the ones he had seen Cole reading on multiple occasions.

And then there was Henry, seated at his deck chair leaning over one of the many notebooks Collier had thrown there, reading. With a sigh, Cole, who had just finished sorting through the shoes he would be bringing approached the other boy and peered over his shoulder.

"You're not supposed to be going through my stuff, you're supposed to be packing my stuff," Cole demanded and then his eyes got wide when he realized what Henry had discovered.

"I'm taking a break," Henry commented, not looking up from the pages and Cole tried to take the notebook away from him. "Hey, no-"

"Sarah and I started that in fourth grade. There's no point in reading in," Cole demanded, still trying to take the notebook. Henry stood, clutching it with his right hand and using his left hand to prevent Cole from reaching it.

Throughout their first three years in elementary school, all of Collier and Sarah teacher's got annoyed with how much they spoke to one another in class and separated them. By fourth grade, they had a plan to pass a notebook back and forth between the two of them to talk instead of using their words, and they had done this for many years before they could control themselves.

"You talk about me," Henry said, holding the notebook high above his head and looking up at it while Collier pathetically jumped to reach it.

"Why are you so tall?!"

"You think I'm hot," Henry exclaimed and Collier began to weakly punch him.

"I thought you were hot when you were in fifth grade, now you're just ugly," Collier snapped and Henry laughed, still reading the words.

"'This isn't about me in fifth grade. We're all the way to eighth grade now, Collie. That wasn't even that long ago," Henry claimed and Cole stopped trying to reach the book and instead stood with his arms crossed.

"If you don't give it back I'm going to punch you in the dick so hard you'll never be able to make babies," Collier claimed and Henry looked down at him, clearly amused.

"I'll never be able to make babies," he pointed out quietly. "Men can't have babies with other men".

"Then I'll cut it off and you won't be able to even try," Cole said and Henry grinned at him.

"I'm almost to the end".

"I don't care".

"I'm going to finish this," Henry claimed and Cole raised his eyebrows before situating himself to punch Henry in the groin.

"You brought it on yourself," Collier warned, but before he could even move Henry's left hand dropped to his side and began to tickle him as a distraction. "No! What are you doing? Stop that".

And then Collier was laughing as he tried to slap the other boy's hand away, and Henry dropped the notebook, no longer interested in anything by the giggling boy in front of him. "You're so weak," Henry taunted and Collier tried to push his hands away and failed again.

"Hey," Cole panted, his face aching from the wide smile on his face. "It hurts!"

"It does not," Henry declared, continuing his ministrations and Cole laughed some more before reaching around behind the brunette and picking up the notebook from his desk and hitting Henry with it.

"Ouch," Henry said with a small laugh, giving a loud sigh of defeat and dropping back down into the desk chair.

"Do your job," Cole demanded with a smile, rubbing his sides to soothe the tickles he still felt. Henry rolled his eyes and dropped his head back against the back of the chair.

"I was doing my job, you were distracting me," Henry claimed, turning the chair back to face the desk and it was Cole's turn to roll is eyes.

"Well maybe if you-"

"As cute as that was," Sarah cut in, standing next to Emerson on the other side of the room. Both of them were grinning suspiciously, "I'm not about to pack up your entire room while you two flirt".

Cole just stuck his tongue out at them and Henry hummed in what sounded like agreement. "We don't need-"

"I'm confused," Cole's mom cut in and he looked over at her quickly. His first thought was that she was questioning his relationship with Henry- which even he didn't really understand- but instead she was looking into the last drawer of his night stand with wide eyes.

"Oh god, Collier, what did you keep in there?" Sarah asked and Cole looked up as his father crossed the room to stand next to his ex wife and look into the the drawer.

"It's empty," the older man observed and Collier's mother turned around then to raised her eyebrows at Cole.

"That's right," she said. "It's empty".

"I don't understand what's happening right now," Cole said, glancing at Sarah who also looked confused. "Why are you confused. Things become empty when you take everything out of them".

She rolled her eyes. "Cole, I didn't find anything I didn't want to see". It was spoken as if he was being scolded and he raised his eyebrows.

"Then why do you sound mad at me?"

"Don't you have condoms or anything?" She demanded and Collier's gold eyes grew very large. Emerson burst out laughing, clutching Sarah's shoulder as he doubled over. "I'm serious. No condoms, or lube, or sex toys, or anything. What's wrong with you?"

Cole scoffed loudly, his face heating up. "What's wrong with me? You're the one mad at me because I don't have lube in my drawer. I'm not even having sex, why would I have lube?" He snapped and then Sarah cleared her throat.

"Umm-"

"Oh god," Collier groaned, slapping his hand over his face. "I don't do that either".

"Sometimes," his father said, sitting on the edge of his bed and smiling at him. "I wonder where you came from. Responsible with sex? You're adopted, right?"

"You know he's not, Bradley," His mother said, hitting his father on the arm. "I remember the night you were conceived, Cole. We were-"

"Oh my god, shut up," He interrupted, slapping his hand over his ears, but his mother just kept talking.

"Fifteen, so sophomores, and your father had just broken up with Matthew, and I was still dating your aunt. Since we were all best friends, her and I were the ones supposed to comfort him".

"A boy did she," Cole's father finished and his mother giggled.

"You guys," Collier cried and his parents burst out laughing and high fived one another. Collier watched then, noticing this was the happiest he had seen his parents in over a year.

Maybe, Collier had to admit, they really were better off just as friends.

***

Collier's mother started crying once the room was packed and all the boxes were in the car. It was hard, Cole realized, moving out of his childhood home, leaving behind his memories and his mother. Since he also wanted to cry, he simply looked to his father, who excused himself from his conversation with Henry and went to comfort his ex-wife.

When no one was paying attention, Collier slipped out of the living room and hurried back up to his bedroom.

He stood in the doorway for a moment, blinking at the few items in the now nearly empty room.

This was it.

It almost felt like the end of his childhood. Like he was leaving behind his old life and starting a new one.

"Stop being so fucking dramatic," Cole said to himself, wincing as a drop of warm liquid ran down his face. "What's wrong with you?"

"Collie?" Collier jumped a foot in the air at the sound of Henry's voice and began to quickly rub the tears off of his face. "Are you alright?"

When he was sure he looked composed, he turned around to face the blue eyed boy and gave him what he hoped looked like an honest smile. "Yeah, I'm great".

"Collier," Henry said, taking a step forward. Feeling more tears coming, Cole dropped his eyes to Henry's shoes, but a finger was placed under his chin a second later, lifting his face. "Why are you sad?"

"Because I'm leaving," Cole said, blinking quickly to clear his tears. "I know I wanted to leave, but I didn't think she'd actually let me".

"Do you want to go?" Henry asked and Collier sighed.

"I want to go, but I don't want to go. I don't know Henry. I just-" Collier cut himself off with a shaky breath, trying to look away again as hot tears began to trickle down his face. "God, don't look at me. I'm so ugly when I cry".

Henry made a soft noise before raising his thumb and brushing away Cole's tears. "You're alway pretty".

"Shut up," Collier managed to grumble before he was pulled into Henry's chest and strong arms slid around his waist, holding him close as he cried.

Cole felt safe with Henry. He felt as if his problems were, for the first time, manageable because someone else would be there to help him through them.

He thought about Jake for a moment, not to compare the two or anything, but to remensis on something Jake had asked him the night of their date, which felt like months ago.

Do you love him?

At that point, Collier didn't know what to say. A week ago, him and Henry's relationship had solely been based on them kissing, but even then Collier had to admit he felt something. But now? After their perfect date the night before, and a whole day of Cole turning and catching Henry staring at him with what he thought had to be utter adoration in those blue eyes-

Now Collier knew the answer to the question Jake had asked.

He knew the answer, and he was afraid of it.

"I'm having such a terrible year, Henry," Collier sobbed, his fists curling in the fabric of Henry's grey shirt, stinking the fabric but not caring. "First my parents and then Sarah's always busy and-"

And I fell in love with you, but you said we could never be together.

Collier cried harder, resulting in Henry hugging him even tighter.

At some point, Cole didn't know after how long, his bedroom door opened. On any normal day, Collier would be rather embarrassed to get caught sobbing in his room being comforted by Henry Stone, but by this point he was so emotionally exhausted that all he could do was press harder into Henry's chest.

"Is he okay?" Emerson asked and a second later Sarah began to speak.

"Cole-"

"I got this," Henry assured, his hands tightening on Collier's waist, almost like he was afraid Sarah would pry Cole away from him. "It's okay".

The sound of the door closing again signified their departure, and a second later Henry pressed his lips against Cole's hair, kissing the side of his head affectionately. "Do you want to spend the night at your dads?"

"I don't know," Cole cried. "Henry, I-"

"Hey". Henry pulled back a bit and lifted Collier's chin to meet his eyes. "It's okay, Cole. You don't need to know right now. Just keep in mind that you're always welcome at my house".

Cole swallowed heavily, blinking his eyes slowly. "Always?"

Even after we end whatever this is? Even after Emerson and Sarah break up? Even after you meet someone new, someone you actually want to be with?

"Always," Henry promised, cupping his face in both hands and smiling down at him. "I'll be there whenever you need me".

And then he kissed him, swallowing whatever words Cole was going to say next.

Swallowing I love you.