A/N: Content Warning: Discussion of domestic violence.

Blake showed up to Yale because Anthony promised him that they would watch a documentary together once it came out.

Anthony was surprised because, "You willingly got on a plane? Are you okay mentally?" and Blake gave him a look that said that he wanted to punch Anthony in the neck.

So, they all gathered (Marty included) in Rory's room to watch this documentary. Liberty, Georgia, Todd, and Paris were busy, so it just left the others to watch it together.

At one point, Marty asked, "How is this man just perving on people in the ceiling? How could they not hear him? I hear a squirrel on my roof. This man is like two hundred squirrels over the limit."

Blake responded to Marty, "I think I'm the only sane person wondering if this guy is jacking off or not."

Anthony ended up spitting some ice into his cup of water because he was laughing.

"I thought I was the only one wondering how gross that attic looks," Sage said.

"Where is he doing it at, because the floor's got to look like a candle," Aiden replied. "I mean, how is he doing it all day?"

"I'm wondering why his wife is just casually bringing him snacks," Marty added.

"Now I'm trying to picture the go-to stance for him to be jacking off," Blake stated.

"No, dude, don't imagine him doing it," Anthony told him, looking disgusted. "That's just weird."

"I'm just saying, the guy's not power-stance, balls over the vent, doing it," Blake continued. "It's going to get everywhere."

"He's probably sitting down, legs extended," Aiden replied. "This feels the most normal, but your back is going to hurt if you're bent over the vent, looking. You're going to need back support."

Marty asked, "What if you're sitting crisscross applesauce?"

"If that's the case, the man needs jailtime just for that alone," Sage told him, clearly judging him.

"I don't like bets, but chances are, the man's right on his knees on with a cushion underneath to fend off the arthritis," Anthony told them. "Unless he's goblin statue standing it depending how limber this guy is."

There was a knock on the door and Rory went to answer it.

"Hey, Rory," Logan started.

"Have we talked about this far too long?" Blake was saying, "I just want to match this man's energy, because dude put sex toys and porn and a thousand dollars in the room just to see what guests are going to do with it while he watches from his perv perch."

Logan peered into the common room trying to find the strange guy's voice. "Who was that? That didn't sound like Anthony."

"Oh, that's Blake, Anthony's brother. We're all watching a documentary that he and Anthony wanted to watch," Rory explained.

"Oh, well, you can bring them with you to China Palace," Logan said. "We got to get Thea, Aiden, and Sage..."

"Oh, they're here too," Rory said. "Marty is also here."

"Oh, Marty can come too," Logan replied. "The more the merrier."

Rory started, "Oh, well—"

"Come on," Logan urged. "I want to hear about this documentary that you're watching too, because it sounds...interesting. I can pick up a copy on my way back."

"It's not out yet," Marty said. "Their dad's production company helped fund it, so they got an early copy." 

"Oh, cool," replied Logan, looking not very interested anymore.

Logan dragged them down to a restaurant called China Palace and then ordered a lot of wine and beer.

Madeline and Louise, and two women named Juliet and Rosemary had joined their group. Rosemary had taken an immediate interest in Sage, because of their names being herbs and decided that she must make him her new BFF, something that Sage looked like he didn't want.

Anthony and Blake both looked a little uncomfortable at the sight of all the alcohol, but when asked, they asked for water or soda.

"You don't drink either?" Logan asked Blake.

"No," replied Blake.

So, you're Anthony's brother?" asked Logan, taking in the different appearances.

"No," replied Blake. "I was just some random kid that was yanked off the streets and his parents said, 'Hey, Zoe, Anthony, this is your new little brother.'"

Logan looked like he wasn't sure whether to believe him or not.

"I was not adopted," Blake said. "I even took a DNA test."

"And Mom framed it and hung it next to your mugshot on the family tree mural," Anthony stated.

"You got arrested?" Logan asked, "For what?"

"Calling and lying to the police about me hitting my girlfriend just so I can get away from her," Blake explained.

"What did she do?" asked Marty confused.

"Slashed my face open," Blake explained. "Hit me because I annoyed her in her dreams. Hit me because I annoyed her in general. Hit me because I didn't listen to her. Hit me because we were watching Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Just hit me and yelled at me for whatever reason. I swear I saw the devil in her eyes when she was doing that."

"My ex used to hit and yell at me too," Rosemary told Blake. "The worst part is still loving them afterwards and wanting to go back because you don't want to be alone."

"Yeah," Blake agreed. "End up thinking that you were the problem."

Rosemary nodded, "Yeah." 

"So, who wants to hear a story about Colin drinking so much that I thought he was never going to wake up?" asked Logan, wanting to have a lighthearted evening that these two Debbie downers were ruining by their stories.

"I think you just told it," Thea told Logan.

"Oh, come on," Madeline said. "I want to hear the story."

"Me too," Louise added.

Logan threw a smile their way and launched into the story.

Thea tuned Logan out thinking about her plans for later that evening. She had asked Sookie about the edible underwear thing, and while Sookie looked a little uncomfortable, she had told Thea the store that sold it. She managed to work up a bit of nerve to buy some.

Finn kept looking at Sage, Aiden, and Thea, wondering how he would fit with them.

Thea finally tuned back to hear Logan say, "I swear, I thought he was never going to wake up."

"If I knew the hangover was going to last that long I wouldn't have," Colin replied.

"There's nothing like a 'you wouldn't believe how drunk I was' story to get the girls all hot," Rosemary stated dryly.

"It always worked before," Colin stated.

"And it's making me dryer than sandpaper," Thea replied.

"I used to go on two week-long drug binges," Anthony replied. "I remember waking up and wondering what century I'm in." He sounded sarcastic, "Hey, Rory, does that turn you on?"

"Not really," replied Rory.

Logan chuckled, "Damn, that sounds awesome. The whole two-week drug binge thing."

"No, it's not. That's dangerous, because you'll be OD'ing and going back out there for more because you're that hooked. And once the withdrawals hit, oh man, you're in for a real fun time, because you're going to be spending a lot of time in the bathroom and then you'll cave in because you'd rather not go through that ever again. And then people are going to treat you like trash because you're an addict and you deserve to be treated as such. And then when your friend gets beheaded, the police are going to be like, 'well, just another addict. Glad the trash took itself out' and then only do something because there's a blood covered naked woman running down the street waving a knife around who's hardcore tweaking out and they can't have that. So, if you want to go on those drug binges, be my guest but don't come crying to me when the police give you zero sympathy when you're going through withdrawals in a jail cell after getting eighty years for drug possession, while your cellmate, who got thirty years for murdering his wife, watches, all because you're just another addict who deserves to be treated like garbage." Anthony looked at Blake, "Hey, are you going to eat that baozi?"

"Yeah," Blake replied. Anthony locked his gaze on the pork bun. Blake just sighed and handed it to Anthony, who smirked in victory.

"You know, you should be glad you didn't get alcohol poisoning like me," Anthony told Colin. "Or been so drunk that you had really had to pee but can't find your dick."

"Damn," Logan said. "You really must've been wasted."

"That's what you get for trying to outdrink your former housemate while playing Under the Table," Rory told Anthony.

"What's Under the Table?" asked Colin.

"A drinking game my housemate came up with," Anthony replied. "You lay all your money on the table which has a whole bunch of alcohol on the table. Then whoever's playing goes under the table, gets back up, takes a drink of something, goes back under the table, gets back up, drinks, and repeats that process until only one person remains standing. They get the money and must supply drinks for the next game. Pretty sure the people all the way in Spain heard our livers screaming in agony from that game."

Logan nodded, "Nice. Next party we should play that game." He had clapped Anthony on the shoulder. "Any other party games?"

"There was a game called Slap Kiss," Anthony replied. "It's like Spin the Bottle, but instead, the person that the bottle lands on, goes to another room and everyone, except the spinner, votes on the spinner either kissing or slapping the person that had left the room. Either way, the person gets a surprise." They, except Rory, looked at Anthony. "Yeah, I kissed guys, and I slapped women. And I got slapped by women."

"Okay, we're not playing that game," Logan decided.

Anthony looked at Logan, "You need to be sober to play, and you're too straight for that game anyway. It's a good thing you're rich, because showering in jail with a bunch of other men and police officers watching, would traumatize you."

Rory crammed an eggroll in Anthony's mouth, "Leave the jailhouse stories at the door, babe."

Thankfully, servers came to bring more food and drinks to the table.

Juliet said, "Oh, god, the smell of this food is making me ill."

Rory seemed surprised, "Mmm, I think it's delicious."

Juliet looked at Rory, Thea, Madeline, and Louise, "How can you eat like that?"

"Very easily," Thea stated.

"Juliet hasn't eaten a meal since 1994," Rosemary stated.

"My metabolism simply doesn't accept food," Juliet stated.

Thea looked at Juliet, "Are you okay?"

"Her metabolism must be it," Logan said, sarcastically. "A modern miracle."

"Rosemary's going home with me tonight," Finn said, randomly.

"Nobody asked, Finn," Thea told him.

"I just thought everyone at this table should know," Finn replied.

"Oh, Finn," Rosemary replied, "You do hallucinate."

Juliet asked Rory, "Are you going to eat that fried shrimp?"

Rory asked, "Why? Do you want some?"

"No, but can I watch?" asked Juliet, looking a little too eager.

Thea wondered if Juliet had some weird fetish thing going on. Then again, she shouldn't talk. She once ate a doughnut while having sex with Aiden. It made her feel like a goddess. She should do that again...

"Juliet, just eat something," Logan told Juliet.

"No!" Juliet explained, "I am not eating until I get married to some gorgeous but very poor man who will sign an iron-clad prenup and get very, very fat, but he won't ever leave me because he would be cut off without a penny and die in a trailer park."

"My god, that is brilliant," Finn told Juliet.

"At least you have goals," Sage told Juliet.

"That is a sick goal," Rosemary told Sage.

"I agree with anything Rosemary says tonight," Finn stated.

"Not going home with you, Finn," Rosemary stated.

"Eat a bunch of garlic. I heard it repels vampires," Thea told Rosemary.

Rosemary looked at Thea, "Good idea."

Colin said, "You know where they had the best Chinese food in the world? This tiny little place outside of Zugerberg."

Logan said, "Aw, Zugerberg."

"The golden days of Zugerberg," Finn said.

"What's Zugerberg?" asked Marty.

"Zugerberg is the boarding school I went to in Switzerland," Colin explained.

"Really?" asked Rory.

"Yup," Colin replied. "Grade seven through twelve."

"Wow," Rory replied. "Living in Switzerland? That sounds exciting."

"Boarding school," Marty said. "Man, that must've sucked."

"Sucked? Are you kidding?" Colin said, "Those are the greatest days of my life. Oh my god, the partying that went on there. Insane."

"I did a year at Andover," Logan said. "Not bad."

"So you didn't miss your home? Your family?" asked Marty.

"My family? Did I miss my family?" Colin chuckled, "Logan, did I miss my family?"

"Huh, let's see," Logan asked, "Which mom were you on then?"

Colin replied, "I believe it was the blonde."

"Ah, yes," said Logan.

"She was hot," Finn said.

"You didn't know her, Finn," Colin pointed out.

"All your mothers have been hot, Colin," Finn said.

"No, Marty," Colin said. "I didn't miss my family."

Marty looked at Anthony and Blake, "Where did you two go to boarding school? Did you miss your home? Your family?"

Logan got a weird look, probably wondering why Marty asked two poor people that question.

"We went to a private school." Anthony said.

"Our parents used to threaten to send me and my siblings to one as punishment," Blake explained. "Like 'Blake, if you keep dismembering your sister's dolls, you're going to a boarding school.' Or, 'Zoe, if you keep scaring your brothers, you're going to a boarding school.' Or 'Anthony, stop moving your brother's things in the middle of the night, or I'll send you to boarding school.'"

"Our family is very 'family above anything else,'" Anthony added.

Marty looked at Thea, Rory, Sage and Aiden, "And where did you guys go to school?"

"Chilton," Rory said. "It was a private school."

"Sage, Aiden, and I went Stars Hollow High," Thea replied.

"What's that?" asked Logan.

"A public school," Thea replied.

Sage laughed, "All sorts of weird crap went down there."

"Like what?" asked Colin.

"Aiden, Craig, and I got suspended for starting a mini-scale riot," Thea said.

"How?" asked Logan.

"Some random guy just came up and started strangling Craig, and when I tried to stop it, the random guy started strangling me," Thea explained. "And Aiden came in to stop it, but everyone just decided to start fighting each other. We got sent to the principal's office and got suspended for starting a mini-scale riot."

"There was also the aggressive goose getting in the school and unlocking doors," Sage replied.

"Everyone knows that geese are aggressive, no need for 'aggressive,' to be added," Anthony said.

"And some kid got thrown out the school window for somehow cheating at chess," Aiden said.

"There was that couple that fell out of the ceiling because they were having sex," Thea added.

"Someone burnt down the cubicles in the boys' restroom," Sage said. "Just the cubicles."

"Someone stole a classroom door sophomore year and apparently they never replaced it according to some boys who go there now," Aiden said.

"And they stole a sink," Sage added.

"And the fire exit sign," Thea finished.

"There were also the wooden slates for the bleachers," Aiden added.

"Oh, right, I forgot about that," Thea replied.

"And Madison doing PCP for the first time and got carried out of the school foaming at the mouth," Thea said.

"Someone rolled toilet paper that was on fire, down the hallway," Sage said.

"Those two girls who got in a fight over a boy, and one of the girls punched the principal in the balls and while he was on the ground in pain, the girl elbowed dropped him because she had nothing left to lose," Thea said.

"The gym teacher's lesbian sex photos that got copied and pasted all over the school," Aiden replied.

"The guy who threw the scissors at Brittany, nearly taking out her eye, and she smeared blood on the walls of the hallway," Thea added.

"Mr. Hammond who threw an annoying kid out of an open window and the kid's parents were threatening to sue the school if they didn't reinstate Mr. Hammond," Sage said.

"That kid who did magic mushrooms and ran naked through the courtyard and had to be tackled by a security guard," Aiden said.

"That couple that broke up in my cooking class, and the girl who threatened her ex with a hot oven rack and she got a microwave thrown right in her face," Thea replied.

"The guy who got stabbed in the neck with a pencil in the locker room," Aiden said.

"Mr. Fisher who made me take a note to another teacher and I read it in the hallway, and it said, 'check out the ass on this guy.'" Sage said. "And I realized that he usually sent out girls to deliver notes and those notes probably said a lot worse."

"That one girl who threw a pen into another girl's eye," Thea said and looked at the others who just flat out looked horrified.

"And here I thought the wildest thing that happened at my school was that one girl that started giving birth in biology and the teacher made us gather around her to watch the 'gift of life'," Anthony said. "Or the English teacher who had a collection of street signs and ended up starting a sign-stealing ring that involved one hundred students who just wanted to give her more signs for her collection."

"The worst thing that happened to me was some guy throwing a Taco Bell burrito at me from his car when I was walking home from school," Blake said. "He yelled something at me, but I don't know what it was."

"Who's Craig?" asked Finn.

"A mutual friend of ours," Sage said.

"He did six years in juvie," Aiden added.

"Dare I ask what he do?" asked Logan.

"He abetted and abided a murderer," Anthony said.

"He lied to police, saying that his baby-sitter was with him watching a movie when she went out and killed her abusive ex-boyfriend with her friends. He was ten," Thea explained.

"You know a lot of criminals," Juliet pointed out.

"Not really," Thea replied.

Aiden started, "Elowen who robbed banks, my dad who straight up murdered my mother when I was eight."

"Your dad killed your mom?" asked Logan shocked.

"Yeah," Aiden replied.

"Why?" asked Colin.

"I don't want to talk about it," Aiden replied.

Logan asked, "Was it just out of the blue?"

"He doesn't have to tell you shit, Logan," Thea warned. "Back off."

"All right, I'm sorry," Logan replied.

They went back to eating.

After eating, Blake passed a fortune cookie to Anthony and opened his.

"Okay, the night's young," Logan said. "Where are we going next?"

"I don't think I can move," Rory said.

"You're full?" asked Juliet.

"I'm full," replied Rory.

"Is it fabulous?" asked Juliet.

"You know, Juliet, it doesn't suck," replied Rory.

Anthony asked Blake, "What does your fortune say?"

"Mine says 'Don't panic'," Blake tossed it to the side, "Nice Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy reference."

"I never read that book," Rory said. "Is it any good?"

"I don't know," Blake replied. "I never finished it."

"The worst book I ever read was Wizard's First Rule," Sage replied. "I'm never forgiving Todd for making me read it. I threw that book out the window."

"I read a few chapters of that book and had my dad catch that book on fire," Blake told him. "Organic Chemistry was what made me become an accountant," Blake said.

"I remember reading the Scarlet Letter while walking during my junior year in high school. The ground woke me up," Anthony said.

"My aunt and uncle sent me to bible camp once." Aiden said, "The only part I liked was when Jesus wanted to eat a fig, but it wasn't the right season, so he cursed the tree while his disciples watched. I had this mental image of Jesus shaking his fist at a tree."

"Sarah, Plain and Tall," Thea said.

"Thanks for reminding me that book existed," Juliet said.

"I remember my fourth-grade teacher reading it out loud to us and I remember hating it," Rosemary replied.

"Let's go to the Alligator Lounge," Finn suggested.

"Yes. Perfect. I think it's best than sitting around, discussing what boring books we have read." Logan said, "It has Zydeco music. You'll love this place."

Blake gave Logan a look, like "are you fucking kidding me?"

Sage leaned over and whispered to Thea, "The hell is Zydeco music?"

"I have no clue," Thea replied.

And since Sage was right there, he kissed Thea on the cheek. So, Aiden kissed Thea on her other cheek.

"What are you looking at?" Blake asked Finn, noticing that Finn was staring at them like a weirdo.

"What do you say, Marty?" Logan asked, "You up for a little Cajun craziness?"

"I'm too old for this shit," Blake replied.

"How old are you?" asked Juliet.

"Twenty-six," Blake replied.

"That's not old," Logan replied.

"Okay, I got it," Colin said. "Everybody owes seventy-five bucks. Pony up, please, so we can get the hell out of here."

"Seventy-five?" asked Marty.

Thea didn't blame him. Even that sounded like a lot to her.

"I got you three," Logan said to Rory, Anthony, and Blake.

Blake gave Anthony a look and Anthony slightly tilted his head. Realization dawned on Blake, "Oh, okay. Cool."

Colin was confused, "Did you two just have an entire conversation based off of looks alone?"

"Yeah," Blake replied.

"I thought that was a twin thing," Colin replied.

"I think it's a thing for any siblings that are close," Anthony replied.

Rory looked at Marty, "Are you okay? Do you have enough?"

Marty started, "Uh, I don't—"

"Hey, don't sweat it man," Logan cut in. "I can cover you, too."

"No thanks," Marty replied.

"It's not big deal," Logan insisted. "I invited you. My treat."

"It's okay," Marty was saying, getting up. "I just need to find an ATM. I'll be right back." He walked off.

Rory started, "Marty—"

"An ATM," Colin sneered. He snickered, "My, how quaint."

Anthony asked, "Then how do you get money if you don't use an ATM?"

"His money just materializes on his bedside table because ATMs are for us peasants," Sage stated.

Thea was surprised to hear Finn muffle a laugh.

"I'll be right back," Rory said.

Anthony was confused, "Where are you going?"

"I think I remember seeing a bank across the street, so I'll go catch Marty," Rory said.

"Okay," replied Anthony.

Rory took off.

Logan asked Anthony, "You're okay with letting her be alone with a guy who has a crush on her?"

"I trust Marty way more than I trust Dean," Anthony replied.

"Who the hell is Dean?" asked Logan.

"Long story," Aiden replied.

Logan said, "I think we got time."

"He was Rory's high school boyfriend. She should tell you about it," Thea pointed out.

"I had a few run-ins with him," Anthony replied. "Meeting him was like eating ice and mint at the same time while getting burned from your hot shower water."

"For maximum pain, add orange juice to that mixture immediately after brushing your teeth," Blake told Anthony.

Thea was pretty sure that they were masochists and then remembered that Anthony allowed Rory to strangle him during sex. Apparently, Rory was not into that.

"Should give him doughnuts but instead of crème or jelly filled, put Siracha in it instead," Blake replied. "Or better yet, have one have Siracha in it while the others are fine. Say that whatever happened is water under the bridge and just walk away."
Colin asked Blake, "Are you okay?"

"I had these two friends, who never met each other. I told them both that the other is a bit deaf and I spent three minutes watching them shout at each other, before they realized that I'm an asshole," Blake said to Colin.

Anthony just started laughing, "That's hilarious."

Rory and Marty thankfully returned with money.

"So, the Alligator Lounge?" asked Logan.

"I'm glad I'm getting on a plane tomorrow just so I can avoid that," Blake stated.

"I have plans," Thea said.

"What are your plans?" asked Finn.

"Them," Thea motioned to Sage and Aiden, "They're my plans."  

Finn looked like he was going to say something but didn't. Sage narrowed his eyes at him.

When Thea, Sage, and Aiden got to the dorm room, Thea changed into edible underwear.

Needless to say, Sage and Aiden loved it.