A/N: Content Warning: Christopher

Title taken from the song White Wedding by Billy Idol.

After the whole Friday Night Dinner, Lorelai grabbed Rory's arm to stop her from leaving. "Hey, hold on."

"What?" asked Rory, turning to Lorelai.

Lorelai asked, "What was that back there?"

"What was what?" asked Rory, confused.

"The whole holding a dress up to yourself?" asked Lorelai. "What was that?"

"Me admiring a dress?" replied Rory.

"That was so not admiring a dress," Lorelai pointed out. "That was you imagining wearing it while you marry Anthony."

"How would you know?" asked Rory.

Lorelai asked, "What is going on with you? Why are you being so crabby?"

"Because you're throwing wild accusations at me," Rory replied. "I was not fantasizing about marrying Anthony."

"Then what was that?" asked Lorelai. "Are you engaged and forgot to tell me like how you forgotten to tell me about Anthony's wrap-sheet and the fact that you slept with him and forgot to tell me."

"If I told you that he got busted for drug possession you – oh, I am so not having this conversation with you again," Rory replied, realizing that they were about to rehash last year's argument.

"Rory, just tell me if you're plan on marrying the guy," Lorelai said.

"I'm not going to marry him," Rory replied darkly.

"Oh, honey. Did he propose, and you turned him down and now you're regretting?" asked Lorelai.

"He did not propose to me," Rory replied.

"Then what? Do you want to marry him?" asked Lorelai.

Rory paused, "I would want to one day. Just not right now."

Lorelai asked, "Have you even discussed this with him?"

"No," Rory replied. "We can't get married. We're still in college, he works at a pizzeria during the summer, he still lives with his parents, and he can't decide if he wants to live in Florida or move to Hartford or New Haven, so it'll be cheaper for me to visit you, Grandma and Grandpa, and Stars Hollow, even though he loves Florida."

"Why are you so crabby?" Lorelai looked horrified, "Are you...?"

"I am not pregnant," Rory hissed at her. "I'm just annoyed at you for making a big deal out of nothing."

"I don't want to throw your life away by marrying him so young," Lorelai said.

The door to the house opened and Emily peered at them, "Is everything all right?"

Lorelai and Rory both plastered on fake smiles.

"Yeah, everything's fine," Lorelai lied.

"Well, all right then," Emily replied, going back inside.

Lorelai pointed at Rory, "We are not done here."

"I think we are because I just told you that you're making a big deal out of nothing," Rory told Lorelai.

There was a knock on the door, so Christopher went to answer. When he opened the door, he was surprised, "Emily. Wow. This is a surprise."

"May I come in?" asked Emily.

Christopher stepped to the side, "Yes, please come in." Emily walked in. "I didn't even know you knew where I lived."

"I know all kinds of things," Emily said, glancing around, "Obviously you have a maid."

"Yes, I have a maid-nanny combo," Christopher replied.

"Ah," Emily said, "How McDonald's of you." She looked at the TV, "There's a scratch on the TV."

"I put Thomas & Friends on for her and she threw her sippy cup at the TV for some reason," Christopher replied.

"Uh, can I get you something?" Christopher offered, "A tea, or coffee, or—"

"I'm fine, thank you," Emily said, looking at Gigi, "So, this is the child."

"Yes, this is Georgia," Christopher replied. "We call her Gigi."

"And her mother's still gone?" asked Emily.

"Yes," Chris replied. "She's in Paris."

"All right," Emily replied. "I'll come straight to the point, Christopher. Now, I have known you a long time. I watched you grow up. You were a charming boy. A weak, but charming boy. And to be completely honest, I never thought much of you. I still don't."

"Wow," replied Christopher. "That's great of you to come by and share that with me."

"However, that's not why I came here," Emily replied. "You are aware that Rory is in a relationship."

Christopher was surprised, "I did not know that."

"You didn't?" asked Emily surprised.

"She left that out when I saw her at Yale," Christopher replied. "Come to think of it, Lorelai didn't mention it either."

"Oh," Emily replied. "Well, they've been together a little more than a year at this point."

"Okay," replied Christopher. "That would've been great to know. Who's the guy?"

"It doesn't really matter," Emily replied. "I just wanted you to know that I'm worried about her moving fast with this guy of hers because when I was trying on wedding dresses, I saw her holding a wedding dress up to herself. I want you to put a stop to it."

Christopher started, "You want me to—?"

"I want you to tell Rory that she shouldn't throw Yale away just to become some housewife for her boyfriend while he goes to college instead," Emily replied.

"So you want me to break up Rory and her boyfriend?" asked Christopher.

"I don't want them to break up, don't be ridiculous." Emily said, "I just want someone to tell Rory that she shouldn't be thinking about marriage just yet when she's not even halfway through college yet. She hasn't even started on her career yet. And I would want to know if she's getting married unlike how Lorelai never told me she was engaged to Max. I don't want to find out from one of Rory's friends either. And Richard and I haven't even met Anthony's family, and I want to know Grave Robbing Uncle Lynn before Rory gets married."

"Grave Robbing Uncle Lynn?" asked Christopher, confused.

"Now is not the time, Christopher," Emily said. "We need to talk Rory out of marriage."

"Okay, okay," Christopher replied. "Hasn't Lorelai talked to Rory about it?"

"Oh, please, she's probably encouraging it." Emily added, "Lorelai's probably suggesting to Rory and Anthony to get married in Vegas by an Elvis impersonator just because she thinks it'll be hilarious!"

Christopher really couldn't tell Emily that she's probably overreacting and making a mountain out of a molehill. So, he said, "All right, I'll talk to her."

There was another 'Former Convicts Club' meeting, which meant helping Luke with his boat, which was parked in Lorelai's garage (and no, that wasn't a euphemism.)

However, Craig's dad, Brendan, was there to help, because he had actual experience with building a boat.

They were sanding the boat while Anthony drew fonts for Luke to pick out, because Anthony had some artistic talent, which he inherited from his mother.

"Hey, watch it," Craig said to Dave, "You're sanding down my area."

"What are you talking about?" Dave pointed, "This section is mine."

"Would you two shut up?" asked Jess.

"Children please," snapped Jessie. "You're going to give your father a headache."

"Who's our father?" asked Dave.

"Luke," Jessie replied.

Anthony asked, "Then what does that make Ethan?"

"Your other father," Jessie replied.

Craig asked, "And what does that make you?"

"Your mother," Jessie said.

"And what am I?" asked Elowen confused.

"The cool aunt," Anthony offered.

Jessie nodded and the sander that Luke had went flying out of the garage and onto the sidewalk.

"Whoa!" yelled Luke.

"Jeez, Luke," Ethan said. "You're supposed to sand the boat, not the sidewalk."

"Hi, Emily," Luke said to Emily. "I just – I didn't see you standing there. I'm just working on my boat, with my uh, fellow club members."

Emily seemed judgmental, "You're in a club? You're building a boat?"

"We're the Former Convicts Club," Jessie piped up.

Emily looked at each of them – Craig, Dave, Anthony (no surprise), Jess, Ethan, Luke, Elowen, Jessie, and Brendan... "All of you were in jail?"

"Not me," Dave said. "My only crime was secretly dating Lane. I'm just an honorary member."

"I've been arrested once or twice," Jess replied. Luke gave him a look, "Three times."

Emily looked at each of them.

"I'm not a part of anything," Brendan said. "I'm just helping out because I have actual experience in boat making, because my son here—" He clapped a hand on Craig's shoulder, "Was in juvie for six years. So I built a boat from scratch."

"Juvie?" asked Emily blankly, looking at the strange age difference between the two.

"Aiding and abetting a murderer," Craig said in a deep voice that startled Emily.

"I straight up murdered someone," Ethan stated.

"I hit a man with poultry because he smacked my ass," Jessie explained.

"I robbed banks," Elowen said.

"Drug possession, which hasn't changed since the last time I saw you," Anthony said.

"I, uh, hit a man because he pushed my girlfriend there, on the ground," Luke told Emily.

"So, you're all building a boat?" asked Emily.

"Yes," Luke said.

"Does it float?" asked Emily.

"I will make it float," Brendan said in a manner that made Dave inch away. Jess gave Brendan a strange look.

"At least you have a hobby," Emily replied. "As long as it keeps you all out of jail."

"I suppose," Elowen replied.

"Thank god for that, huh?" asked Luke.

"Idle hands and whatnot," Emily replied.

"The boat will float eventually," Luke replied. "Brendan will make sure of that."

"Oh, I'm sure he will," Emily replied.

Luke started "We just have to do a little more—"

"Well, I should get inside," interrupted Emily.

"Yeah, it's nice seeing you again," Luke said.

"Yes," Emily replied.

"Oh, and best wishes on your vow renewal," Anthony told Emily.

"Oh, you're doing a vow renewal?" asked Elowen.

"Yes," replied Emily.

"My mom always says 'good luck'," Jessie replied.

"Ooh, yeah, good luck," Elowen said. "Or best wishes."

"Best wishes," the others muttered.

"Why thank you," Emily replied. "How sweet for all of you to say." She looked at Anthony, "I'll see you tomorrow."

Anthony nodded, "Yeah."

Emily gave Brendan and Craig a look.

Brendan smiled, "My friend, Cynthia and I had him when we were ten."

"In a restroom stall at elementary school, no less," Craig added.

Emily said, "I'm going inside. I'll leave you to build your boat."

They waved her off and Emily went to the house.

When Emily knocked on the door, Lorelai answered it.

"Mom, great," Lorelai said. "Come on in. Okay, so, is that the dress?" She was rushing them.

Emily started, "Yes, yes—"

"Okay, well, let me take a look here," Lorelai said, taking the garment bag and going to the living room.

"Are you aware that there's a bunch of criminals building a boat in your garage?" asked Emily.

"One of those criminals is my boyfriend, Grandma," Rory defended.

Emily looked at Rory's shirt and had to do a double take. "Rory, go put on a different shirt, please."

Rory was confused, "What's wrong with the one I'm wearing?"

Lorelai spoke to Rory, "Honey, just go put on a less vulgar shirt for Grandma, okay?"

Rory got up and went to change shirts.

"Lorelai, you absolutely cannot let Rory marry Anthony," Emily started as soon as Rory left the room.

"Oh, Mom," Lorelai started. "I talked to her, and she's not getting married. She was just admiring a dress."

"That was not her admiring a dress," Emily replied. "Richard and I haven't even met this man's parents yet."

"I haven't either," Lorelai replied. "They're not getting because he still lives with his parents, he hasn't decided whether to stay in Florida or move to Hartford or New Haven so Rory can be closer to us..."

"Us?" asked Emily.

"Me, you, and Dad," Lorelai replied.

"Oh," Emily replied. "Well, that's nice of him to consider us while thinking of moving."

"Yeah," Lorelai replied.

Emily realized something, "They're going to move in together?"

"Maybe sometime down the road, I don't know," Lorelai replied.

Rory finally walked in wearing a different shirt that clearly showed how she felt at being told to change.

Emily asked Lorelai, "Where does she get these shirts at?"

"I have no clue," Lorelai replied.

Rory called Thea down to bring some food for Emily's surprise bachelorette party. It was a surprise because not even Rory and Lorelai knew they were going to host a bachelorette party.

Thea made chocolate raspberry cookie sandwiches and mini raspberry almond tarts.

For backup, she brought Georgia, Liberty, and Paris with her.

Lane, Kyon, Miss Patty and Babette were already there.

Eventually, Sookie arrived with potstickers.

Miss Patty, Babette, and Emily were drinking from blue cups when Lorelai came into the living room with Gypsy.

"Loo, everyone, it's Gypsy," Lorelai said.

"Gypsy!" Emily sounded drunk, "Gypsy's here! Everyone, Gypsy's here!"

Lorelai pointed, "Gypsy, that's Emily."

Emily said, "Come on, Gypsy." She patted the couch in between her and Babette, "Come over here and sit by me."

"Okay," Gypsy said, heading over while Babette moved to sit next to Liberty.

"I have to say, Lorelai, I am loving this drink," Emily said. "Have you ever had one of these, Gypsy?"

"I don't know," Gypsy replied.

"It's called a rum and coke," Emily replied.

"You know, you make look highbrow, Emily, but underneath, you're just a broad," Babette stated.

Rory walked in the living room, holding a plate.

"Did you hear that, Gypsy, I'm a broad," Emily said.

"If she keeps at it like this, Gypsy might start thinking that Emily's into her," Paris told Thea, who nodded.

"I always suspected that Gypsy might have a thing for Lorelai," Thea replied to Paris.

"How's it going?" asked Rory sitting next to Lane.

"Great," Lane replied.

"What are we doing here?" asked Kyon.

"I tried to explain it to her, but it's not working," Lane replied.

Rory spoke to Kyon, "We are throwing my grandmother a bachelorette party."

"But she is married," Kyon pointed out.

"Yeah, but they're doing it again," Rory replied.

"But why?" asked Kyon.

"Because they want to tell each other that they love each other all over again," Rory explained.

Kyon repeated, "But why?"

"Because they do," replied Rory.

"But why?" asked Kyon.

"Kyon, are you sixteen or six?" Paris snapped, "Because you look far to old to be this stupid."

"So, Emily, tell us about this party of yours tomorrow," Miss Patty urged.

"It's going to be fabulous," Emily said. "Isn't it, Lorelai."

"Ab fab, sweetie darling," Lorelai said, using a mock British accent.

"Isn't she hilarious?" Emily said, "I never have any idea what she's talking about, but she's so entertaining."

"That makes both of us," Thea muttered.

"Like a chimp," continued Emily. "Isn't she like a chimp, Gypsy?"

"Pleasemake your mother stop talking to me," Gypsy pleaded with Lorelai.

"If only I had that power," Lorelai replied.

"The party is going to be very, very big. Flowers everywhere, and my dress is incredible." Emily said, "The woman who made it is a genius."

Babette asked, "So, where's it going to be?"

"The Windsor Club," replied Emily.

"Ooh, fancy," said Sookie.

"Well, that ain't no toilet bowl," pointed out Babette.

Thea for some reason was reminded of Anthony talking to his brother over the phone, and the saying, 'No, Blake, why do you sound like you're talking in a toilet bowl?" and then proceeded to gargle water while talking in a bowl to mock his brother. Then it turned out Blake was sick. Anthony still mocked him, "I'm shitting a bowl," and then wished him to get better.

Thea wondered what it would be like if she had a brother.

"No, it certainly is not," Emily said. "It is the perfect place to have my perfect wedding. And what I had to go through to get it, let me tell you." She tried to take a drink, "Lorelai, the cup's empty!"

Lorelai went to refill Emily's cup.

Emily explained, "It was booked up two years in advance, and the Sheldrakes had the Rose Room. They were having a retirement party or something like that." Thea watched as Lorelai poured extra rum in Emily's cup. "And they simply refused to let us have the room. They were stubborn, and selfish, and now, after all the strings I pulled, they are across town at the Bluestone Club, with their piped-in music and their pornographic fountains."

"I need to see these porno fountains," Georgia whispered to Thea.

"I'm hoping water is shooting out of the woman's tits," Liberty added.

Paris asked, "Why does it have to be the woman's tits and not the man's?"

Thankfully Emily took their laughter as them laughing at her story.

"You go, Miss Gotti," Miss Patty said, shoving Emily's shoulder.

"I must say this is the best bachelorette party I ever had," Emily said.

Sookie said, "I really feel like we should play games or something."

"I'm up for a game of Clue," Paris chimed in.

"No," Georgia and Liberty said in unison, looking like they were getting flashbacks from how Paris took the game seriously.

"Or have naughty gifts like edible underwear or dirty-shaped pasta," Sookie added.

Thea needed to ask Sookie where to get edible underwear at because Sage and Aiden would really love that.

"Yeah, too bad—" Lorelai realized something, "Oh, oh!" She went to get something. "Just a sec."

"Where is she going?" Emily asked, "Gypsy, where is she going?"

Gypsy looked like she'd rather not be the receiving end of Emily's friendship.

"Aha!" Lorelai came back into the living room holding a box of pasta.

"What are you doing?" asked Sookie.

"No way," replied Rory.

"Where did you get that?" asked Sookie.

"You gave it to me," Lorelai replied.

"Oh, yeah," Sookie replied, giggling.

Lorelai handed Emily the box of pasta, "Mom, for you on your special night."

Emily took the box, "What's this?" Miss Patty looked at it and started laughing. Emily looked at the, "Oh my god!" She dropped the box on her lap, "Oh my god!"

They laughed at it.

Kyon asked Lane, "What are they laughing at?"

Lane picked up a plate and offered to Kyon, "Have a tater tot, Kyon."

Thea helped Rory clean up the dishes in the living room, sneaking glances at Babette who was passed out on the chair.

Lorelai came down the stairs and whispered, "My mother is fast asleep in my bed, clutching my Hello Kitty pillow, and yes, I have pictures."

"I cannot believe how much rum Grandma drank tonight," Rory replied.

"How much rum she drank?" asked Lorelai, opening up Emily's purse.

"Hey, that's Grandma's bag," Rory said, and Lorelai continued with pulling out a very thick looking binder. "What are you doing?"

Lorelai held up the binder, "I have no idea. I am drunk." She literally skipped into the kitchen.

"Hey!" Rory said, "Come back here with that." Rory and Thea followed Lorelai into the kitchen.

Rory closed the door to her room where Miss Patty was asleep. "What are you doing?"

Lorelai gasped, "There is no way I'm sitting next to Missy Hollerman."

"You can't just mess with a planner's seating chart," Thea told Lorelai as she picked up a sticker with her name on it.

"I'm just fine-tuning it," Lorelai replied. "Oh, the Ramseys' divorce must be legal by now. Time for a little reunion."

"You're evil and I'm going to tell," Rory told Lorelai.

"More like she's cruising for someone to get fired," Thea replied, horrified by what Lorelai was doing.

"Well, if you both tell, then I'm going to tell cousin Drew, aka the Power Spitter, that you both like him," Lorelai threatened.

Thea was disgusted, both at the thought of Lorelai telling Drew that, and at the fact that Lorelai was willing to resort to that just so she can screw around with the seating chart.

"You're mean," Rory said.
Lorelai hummed, and looked at the Huntzbergers who were seated at table seven. "Man, I'll say one thing for my parents, they certainly command a good turnout."

"Hey, do you think the Sheldrakes will be unhappy at the Bluestone Club?" asked Rory.
"Oh, I have no idea." Lorelai said, "However, I do know that Dinky Shaw is going to be sitting next to her ex-husband's daughter from his second marriage. This is the daughter whose conception caused the second marriage. And everybody should bring an extra roll of film."

"Seems mean," Rory said. "Getting them kicked out like that. Seems mean."

"Seems Gilmore," Lorelai started.

Rory started, "Mom—"

"Rory, this is how it works in my parents' world. Trust me, the Sheldrakes are busy screwing someone at the Bluestone out of something as we speak," Lorelai said.

"If you say so," Rory said.
Lorelai said, "These people live in a universe where they feel entitled to get what they want, when they want it, and they don't care who's in their way. I hate that world. Vapid. Selfish. It's like that Life and Death Brigade you wrote about."

Thea was thinking that it was explained Lorelai.

"What do you mean?" asked Rory.

"You know, like a bunch of selfish rich kids, the children of entitlement, blowing off school. Drinking for days. Spending thousands on a stupid and potentially dangerous stunt, knowing full well that they're not going to get in trouble, 'cause Daddy is important. They're all the same."

"They're not all the same," Rory said. "Anthony is part of that world and he's not like that. Logan and his friends may be like that, but Anthony isn't like them."

"Yeah, because the greatest gift Anthony's dad ever gave him was kicking him out of the house," Lorelai replied. "And he learned that the real world has consequences when you break the law and don't have money to buy your way out."

"That is a mean thing to say even if Anthony agrees with you," Rory replied. "And just because you have money, that doesn't automatically make you a jerk. His family isn't like that."

"I know," Lorelai replied. "I didn't mean it like that." She sighed, "So new subject?"

"Yeah, new subject," Rory replied.

"Hey, I wonder if my mother would notice if she and Dad were suddenly at different tables," Lorelai said. Rory gave a look, "Okay."

Thea hung out in the dressing room to prepare for the vow renewal.

Lorelai walked in with her hands behind her back and pulled out the necklaces to show Emily, "Which one do you want?"

"That one." Emily pointed at one, "The other for my birthday."

Rory came over to look and took the necklace. She gasped, "Look at that. It's so fancy."

"Your grandfather has perfect taste in necklaces and earrings," Emily said. "It's very important to find a man who can pick out your jewelry."

"Way ahead of you," Thea said, glancing down at her necklace, that Sage and Aiden bought her.

"Yeah," Rory said, messing with an earring that Thea assumed Anthony had his aunt send to Rory.

"Oh, those are nice," Lorelai said, reaching for Rory's ear.

Rory slapped her hand away, "Stop."

Lorelai headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" asked Emily.

"Uh, to give Dad back the necklaces," Lorelai said.

"Hang your dress up first," Emily told her.

"Oh," Lorelai said, going to get her garment bag.

Rory grabbed her garment bag, "I'm going to go change."

"Great," Lorelai said. "Come back as Thora Birch."

Emily sat down at the vanity, "Oh, Lord, look at that. Pierre has his work cut out for him today."

Thea thought Emily looked fine.

"Stop it, Mom," Lorelai said. "You look gorgeous."

Emily asked, "Lorelai, Thea, why am I doing this?"

Lorelai held up the necklace.

"Oh, yes," Emily said. "It is pretty, isn't it?"

"It's pretty freakin' awesome is what it is," Lorelai said.

"And you love Grandpa Richard," Thea added.

"Oh my god, I'm so nervous, I haven't eaten a thing all day," Emily added.

"Do you want me to whip up a little pasta for you, Mom?" joked Lorelai.

"Stop that," Emily told her. "Maybe I should a Seconal."

Thea went to the dressing room that Rory was in and knocked on the door, "Rory, what the hell is a Seconal?"

"Barbiturates," Rory replied. "Anthony said he used to cram barbiturates down his throat when he went on his two-week drug binges."

"How that man is even alive is astounding," Thea stated in horror.

"Lisette will be here to do your hair any minute," Emily was telling Lorelai.

"My hair is already done," Lorelai said.

"Don't worry, she can fix it," Emily replied.

For a weird moment, Thea wondered if Lisette was Bob the Builder.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that," Emily said. "I'm just so nervous, I can't think."

"Why are you nervous?" asked Lorelai.

Emily exclaimed, "I'm getting married!"

"For the second time," Lorelai pointed out. "Mom, it's a pretend wedding. J.Lo has them all the time!"

"Well, it certainly feels like a real wedding," Emily explained. "After all, we've been separated for months. I'd almost forgotten what it was like to have a man around the house. Oh, god, I missed him. It's a wonderful thing to have a husband, a partner, somebody who's always there. Oh, Lorelai, don't you think you'll ever want to be married?"

"Well, um—" Lorelai smiled, "Actually, I do."

Emily seemed shocked, "Well, that's nice." She looked at Thea, "How about you?"

"I'm not legally allowed to marry two men," Thea replied.

Rory walked out of the dressing room wearing a suit. "Best man in the house!"

"Best woman," Thea corrected. "Best lady?"

Emily went over to Rory, "Oh my goodness, Rory, you absolutely look adorable!"

"Say, aren't you the culture Queer Eye guy?" asked Lorelai.

"Ignore her, you look dashing," Emily said.

"Yeah, now go buy me a pair of those earrings Anthony gave you," Lorelai joked.

"I like it," Rory replied.

"Hey, it's not fair that she gets to dress like that," Lorelai replied.

"You dress is beautiful," Emily told Lorelai.

"Yeah, but she gets to wear, like, a costume," Lorelai said. "Can't I dress like your maid? It'll be whimsical and I can wear flats."

"Go give the necklaces back to your father," Emily told Lorelai.

"You so like her better," Lorelai said.

"You just realized that?" asked Thea.

Lorelai took off.

"What about you, Rory?" Emily asked, "Would you like to get married?"

"One day," Rory replied in a distracted manner.

Thea went into the dressing room to change into her dress.

Thea had to stand next to Emily during the wedding.

"Maybe you all be seated, please," the judge said. They sat down. "I have known Richard and Emily Gilmore for twenty years now. I know them to be two of the most formidable opponents the world has ever seen. They complement each other. They defend each other. They were made for each other. And today, in front of friends and family, Richard and Emily have chosen once again to say to each other, 'I choose you.' How many of us in a lifetime even get chosen once for something we really want?"

Thea looked at Sage and Aiden who were in the audience, who were clearly looking at her. She smiled at them and looked at Rory, who was looking at Anthony who was looking back at her.

The judge continued speaking, "Richard and Emily, will you please face each other. Please repeat after me. 'I, Richard Gilmore...'"

"I, Richard Gilmore..." Richard started.

Thea noticed the back door open, and Christopher walked in. She felt horrified.

"Hey, so where's that kid of ours?" asked Christopher.

"Uh," Lorelai started, scanning the hall for any signs of Rory. She finally found Rory at table five having a conversation with Anthony. Rory was messing with Anthony's hand.

She went over to the table with Christopher following.

"I'm just saying, he wasn't dead, just covered in blue frosting," Rory was telling Anthony.

Lorelai asked, "Hey, Rory, can I talk to you for a second?"

"So, Rory, who's your friend?" asked Christopher.

"This is Anthony," Rory told Christopher. "He's my boyfriend." Rory spoke to Anthony, "Anthony, this is my dad, Christopher." She leveled a glare at Christopher, "Play nice."0

Christopher looked at Anthony and that at Rory, who took off with Lorelai. There was a clear age difference. He sat down at the table, "So, Tony, can I call you Tony?"

"No," replied Anthony.

"So, Tony, how old are you?" asked Christopher.

"Twenty-seven," Anthony replied, annoyed at being called Tony.

Christopher grimaced at the thought of what? An eight-to-seven-year age gap? Well, he can overlook that. Emily clearly thought highly of Anthony, so he must come from money.

Christopher asked, "Have you ever considered marriage?"

"I can't get married," Anthony replied. "I still live with my parents."

"You do?" asked Christopher, shocked and a little amused at the thought of this grown man still living with his parents.

"You have no idea how hard it is to find a place that will accept you with a drug possession charge," Anthony told Christopher.

"Drug possession?" asked Christopher shocked. What was Lorelai thinking letting this guy date Rory?

"I was addicted to heroin for four years," Anthony explained. "One of my housemates was murdered and I called the police. They showed up and decided to arrest us for drug possession. I took the fall to keep my other three housemates from getting arrested. Got eighty years. Added five more years for stabbing a child rapist in the eye."

Maybe Christopher could overlook that. Anthony seems like he has a good head on his shoulders. Lorelai, Emily, and Richard accepted him after all.

"So, how many boarding schools have you been kicked out of?" asked Christopher.

"Never been to boarding school," Anthony replied.

"Oh, so you've been expelled?" asked Christopher.

"No," Anthony replied.

"Suspended?" asked Christopher.

"No," Anthony replied.

"How many private schools have you gone to?" asked Christopher.

"Just the one," Anthony replied. "It was K through 12."

Christopher was confused, "Then what did you do for fun?"

Anthony said, "I once got drunk at a party when I was sixteen and called my dad to come pick me up. He did while I was trying to act normal. To keep the conversation going, I asked him if he was still a virgin. He looks at me with pain in his eyes and says, 'You make me wish I was one.'"

"You drive a motorcycle?" asked Christopher, thinking of Dean.

"No," Anthony replied. "I don't like motorcycles. My former housemate owned a Harley Davidson, and I really didn't enjoy riding a motorcycle. Especially with the way she drove it. She would just casually put one foot in front of her. Sometimes she drove while sitting sideways. Thought she was going to die driving like that."

There was a weird silence.

Christopher stared because good god this man who whole other breed of man. "So...what music do you listen to?"

"All kinds," Anthony replied. "Metal and rock mostly, but country music is my all-time favorite."

"Yeah, I'll be right back," Christopher said, getting up from his chair. He went over to Rory and Lorelai, who were standing with Jason. Christopher pointed at Rory, "Okay, I can overlook the age difference. I can overlook the whole 'former addict who was convicted for drug possession' thing. But I can't overlook the fact that he willingly listens to country music."

Rory looked slightly insulted, "You know, some country music isn't that bad."

Christopher couldn't believe Rory would say something like that to him. "Are you sure you're my daughter?"

Rory just gave Christopher a dark look and walked away.

Christopher watched Rory say something to Anthony and kissed him a little forcefully as if to prove a point to Christopher considering the glare she threw Christopher's way. "You approve of this guy?"

"She seems a lot happier with Anthony than she ever did when she was Dean," Lorelai replied, watching as Rory dragged Anthony up to dance with the others. "And all that matters to me is her being happy."

Lorelai watched as it looked like Thea, Sage, and Aiden were trying to do some tango dance together, getting strange looks when Sage and Aiden ended up dancing together.

"What is going on with those three?" asked Christopher confused.

"She's been dating for the past four years," Jason told Christopher, aghast at how Christopher didn't know. "Where have you been?"