The chapters get better and way more interesting as they go on, I promise.

Millie's POV

We were all sitting in a circle, playing board games and card games. Right now we are playing cards against humanity. I've laughed a lot, which is good. I like laughing. It just doesn't happen too often.

We played monopoly, which took HOURS. I think Sophia won. Caleb fell asleep halfway through, and Noah was just sitting there eating bags and bags of popcorn. Skinny bitch.

"I say we do like a circle secret confession," Lilia said, and the boys groaned.

"We're not girls, Lil. We don't do girl talk." Finn said, and the guys agreed.

"You just have to do 1 confession or 1 secret, it can be fun or sad or whatever you want it to be." Sophia said, and Sadie nodded.

They agreed, but they were kind of forced against their will. The girls are scary when the guys don't agree.

"Okay I'll go first," Caleb said, and smiled. Oh no, here we go.

"My sophomore year I made out with Sadie in a closet inside the school," he said, and the boys laughed.

"That's not true you idiot, now say an actual secret or we will skip you," Sadie said, laughing.

"I like white girls," he said, and I rolled my eyes. Always something with girls.

"Me too," Gaten said, and we laughed.

"Okay well one time our freshman year, Millie and I thought it would be fun to pull an all nighter, so we snuck out and walked around the neighborhood, and that weird dude who lives down the street had his blinds up so we could see him and his girlfriend full on just having sex from his front window," Sadie said, and the guys laughed. The girls were disgusted.

"It was bad," I said, and Sadie and I laughed.

"Finn, your turn." Lilia said, and Finn shrugged his shoulders. Finn doesn't really have secrets, does he?

"One time I tried to kill my brother," he said, completely serious.

"Are you serious?" Noah asked, and Finn nodded.

"I was mad at him when I was little so I put bleach in his drink but I was a fucking moron and didn't read that it was alcohol, so he just got in trouble for drinking," He said, and the guys laughed.

"You're a fucking psychopath, finn." Maddie said, the first time she's spoken. She doesn't talk much, she lets the others talk. Kind of like me.

"Yeah I know," he said. Everyone told me it was my turn. I mean, I guess I can share this.

"In sophomore year, Kyra cheated on me with an 8th grader," I said. Yes, I had a girlfriend. Yes, I am bisexual. Leave the story now if you're going to complain. It doesn't really affect the story in any way whatsoever.

"Damn, I thought she just broke up with you. Not that she cheated on you with an 8th grader. That's kinda stupid though, you're amazing mil," Lilia said, and everyone agreed.

"Thanks guys, but it was a while ago, I'm over it," I said, and they continued on.

-

Soon everyone got a mini room and fell asleep. Maddie and Lilia connected their rooms, I just kept mine to myself. The other side of me was Finn, and he probably doesn't want to share a room.

I crawled over and got across Gatens room and Finns room, and got to mine. It was quiet. I like quiet.

But sometimes, quiet can be troubling for me. I've kept in my anxiety all day, and now it's about to just flow out of me. It was around 3am, so everyone was asleep. I just couldn't sleep. I started to overthink, and that led to me feeling like I couldn't breathe. I've never really experienced this before. Is it the medication?

My hands started to shake and I couldn't breathe, and I felt like I was dying. I didn't know what to do. I started to cry, but very quietly, because I don't want to wake anyone up.

I was trying to control it, but it was just getting worse. I heard someone move in one of the rooms, so I tried to keep quiet.

"Millie? You okay?" I heard someone whisper. It obviously was Finn, considering he was right next to me.

"I'm okay," I whispered back, but my voice was too shaky to even understand what I said. I heard Finn lift up the blanket that was the wall between us, and moved his head to my side to check on me. He saw what was happening, and moved into my little room.

"Can you give me your hands?" He whispered, sitting up, and I gave them to him, and he took them and sat me up as I was trying to control my breathing.

"It's okay, just breathe Mills. I'm right here, okay? You're not alone." He whispered and I nodded. He was trying to calm me down. This has probably happened to him before.

After around 10 minutes, I started to settle down.

"Can I lay down?" I whispered, and he nodded. I laid on my side towards the way he was sitting, and he laid down on his stomach, half in my room and half in his. He just moved the blanket a bit.

"I can stay here until you fall asleep or if that happens again if you want me to," he said, and I nodded. I felt more relaxed. I felt okay.

"I'm gonna try and sleep, Finn." I said, and he nodded.

"Okay. Goodnight Mills. I'll be here if you need me okay?" He said, and I nodded.

"Thank you, Finn. Why are you still up?" I asked, and he shrugged.

"I don't sleep that well." He said, and I nodded.

"Try and go to sleep too. You need sleep. Goodnight Finn, thank you." I said, and closed my eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled, relaxing.

"Goodnight Millie."

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Do you all like this book so far? I know you can't really tell right now, but I promise it gets better. I'll update soon! Love you all.