Dense black smoke travelled high in the sky. Fire crackled taking the whole car without anything behind. The distance sound of sirens passed through the air. I tried getting up but groaned to a pain in my arm. My body was shaken with terror that sank deeper into my bones. Shards of glasses from the car were stuck in my left arm. I sat up moving away from the burning car. Someone came into my mind and my head whipped around with worry.

“Amir” I called, my voice broken.

“Noor” I heard his urgent voice. I looked up to see him running to me, his eyes wide with worry and fear. He was shaking from horror. A bruise on his head.

“Are you okay?” he rushed down to hold me. When his arms went around me, I let out a painful cry. “What’s wrong?” he moved away placing a hand on my shoulder. His hand trembled against my shuddering shoulder. I looked back at the fire which flamed ardently.

“My arm” I whimpered.

“Amir Hussein Mashood” a voice came from somewhere. “Isn’t that a narrow escape?” We searched for where the voice was coming from. Just a feet away from me, Amir’s phone laid on the floor. He growled then picked it up.

“You crazy man” he snarled into the phone. His veins stretched against his skin with his shimmering eyes blazing with anger. A laughter which was callous coated with joy came through the phone. I looked at my husband who slammed his fist on the floor trembling with anger.

“She escaped it. Just in time she got out of the car. Imagine what would happen if she sat there” The man laughed.

“I won’t spare you Santino” Amir roared. My chest clomped seizing my breath for a moment. Santino laughed again. So it’s Santino. The crazy man planted a bomb in our car. How?

“That’s was exactly the same thing your father had said” The sound of sirens came closer. The heat from the burning fire and fear made us sweat. “I could have been happier if it had taken her away maybe you might take me serious. I will be so glad to see you end up in that mad house again”

“Santino!”

“Now let’s get to business” Santino’s voice became serious. “That’s just a warning. Get me what I want and you shall be free or you might not like my surprise next time” the phone beeped indicating the end of the call. Amir roared sending his phone flying across the lot.

The paramedics, police and fire service arrived. I could not even think properly. What I saw was just the fire that swallowed the car. My throat clenched together. If I had sat in that car a little bit longer, I would have been dead. Ya Allah! I exhaled shakily. A paramedic attended to me cleaning up my injuries. The pain in my arm was because I had dislocated my arm.

I was seated on the stretcher with an injured arm being treated to and a police officer asking me questions I could not even say a thing to. He gave up and walked to Amir who had his head buried into his hands. I gazed around the busy scene, from the police to the fire service putting out the fire, the paramedics, the reporters and people that had gathered around. A tear could not fall. I can’t cry. What I knew was I was near death.

“Go in” Amir led me into the living room. The injury on his head had been attended to. He had not followed me in instead he stayed back to see his friend. “Thank you Fawaz” I heard his voice as I halted in centre of the living room.

“It was nothing dear friend”

“How is Kanna (Sister in law) doing?”

“She is shaken” he sighed. Their voices were from a distance but getting their conversation was easy. The next thing he said was in Arabic. They spoke in Arabic until Fawaz left.

“Noor” Amir called.

I snapped my head to him. He exhaled, maybe a tired one but I knew there were lots in his mind. He dropped his jacket on the floor. The expensive material fell into a pool of white. Without a word leaving my lips, I looked away then loosened the scarf around my head. I let it slip to the floor too shaken to care about the pins I had thrown around and the scarf from getting dirty. His light steps echoed through the quiet expanse. I understood the silence. It was the beginning of what never wanted. The silence was eerie and it sent shots of terror through every fibre in my body. He halted few feet away from me near the side stool.

“Noor” his husky voice bounced across the wide expanse.

I raised my eyes to hold his. Those eyes of his that sat away from a well defines nose were nothing but hypnotizing gems that had their own charms and knew when to steal any form of sensibility from me. He moved his muscular body to me like he had a beat in his head, his steps graceful and almost measure. Emotions swam in his honey wheat eyes. They told me more than I wanted and I hoped mine gave him a message. Our eyes was a mirror that shows us the reflection of what was in our hearts and minds.

“Come here” He wrapped his arms around my body ensuring he does not pressed my injured arm. I felt his heartbeat. He was scared so was I. “I am sorry” he whispered into my ear.

“You did nothing wrong” Those were the first words I uttered since the explosion.

I locked my arms around him, holding him tighter as if I wanted him to feel what I was going through. He ran a soothing hand up and down my shaking back. Ya Allah, I don’t know if it helped. I shifted my palm over his back just to be met with something wet over his shoulder blade. It was unusual and I frowned at it.

“What’s wrong?” He asked noticing the way I stiffened against him. I moved away, my troubled eyes met his face. Gently, I removed my hand from his back to have a look at what had wet my hand. Red coated my slender fingers and soft palm. My eyes widened at what I was gawking at before I snapped my head up to look at Amir.

“Subhanallah” I gasped. “You are injured” I swirled to his back to have a view of the spot. When my finger grazed it, he hissed out in pain.

“I did not know. I felt no pain” he said while I was beginning to panic.

“Come here” I pulled him to the settee. In one swift moment, I pulled his vest off. I examined his injury. It was nothing deep but it seemed like something had cut him. “I will be back” I darted to the kitchen where I took the first aid box and dashed out. I flopped beside him.

His back stiffened at the contact of the cotton wool wet with methylated spirit on his back. My heart stomped in my chest with worry for him. He might not had let out a painful cry while I cleaned but I knew he was hurt.

“I am sorry” he apologised again with a very hoarse voice.

“Amir you…..” I began to speak but he cut me off.

“You have never live this life before. Look at where I got you now” I bandaged his injury. “I know you are scared Noor and I wish I could change everything from my father’s mistake to today” His voice was nothing but a whisper. It was such that only I could hear.

“Fear” I replied. “That’s what I feel Amir. I am scared. I could have die you know. That fire would have swallowed me” tears rushed into my eyes. “Ya Allah” I breathe out quavering gently.

He said nothing and I sealed my lips having nothing more to say. When I was through with cleaning his injury, I wrapped my arms around him and buried my head in his back. We needed relieve which was what we got from one another. There was nothing to say but there was so much to feel. There was something Santino kept in mine and my husband’s heart that day, something he had been trying to place in us, fear. I felt it twist my gut and leave behind images that might turn into nightmares. Unable to hold in any longer, I broke into tears in Amir back.

***

It was a rainy morning. Sheets of rain pounded against earth with powerful vivacity. The rain left behind a very cold atmosphere in the room. I wrapped myself in the thick blanket that made me cosy to the bed. I was glad I was not having an early class until noon. Every fibre in my body wanted the bed even though my body did not need rest. When I woke up to the gloomy beams of light that seeped in through the curtains, I met with an empty space next to me. Amir was out of bed.

I sighed turning over to my right where I gazed across the room. My vanity became an interesting thing to look at. The sound of the shower echoed quietly through the room. Amir had been in the bathroom for over the past few minutes I woke up. He stayed longer than usual. He got lot on his mind. His heart was heavy all because of what had been happening lately.

Last night when I had broken down into tears, he had held me into his arms and consoled me like a baby. He was guilty. He felt like everything was his fault especially the close to death experience I had. He carried me to the room where I had changed and gotten ready for bed. In darkness with our bodies tangled together, our hushed voices danced across the room with hearts as heavy as a rock. We tried cheering ourselves us even though the laughter we let out did not touch our hearts. We failed miserably at elevating our spirits. The passion, the feelings and emotions we had next in the comfort of our bed was only known by Amir and I.

It had begun to rain few minutes to 10:00pm the night before until Fajr the following morning. During Fajr, the heavy pounding became nothing but a drizzle. I had a nightmare which scared me and had woken me up. I took that as a chance to do my tahajjud.  I prayed to Allah, I praised him, I thanked him, I asked for his forgiveness and I prayed for my dead mother and Mi Jin. I did dua for my families and friends and most of all my beloved husband.

The bathroom door opened. In came the form of the man that had my heart skipping in my chest. He shut the bathroom. A white fluffy towel was wrapped around his formed waist leaving his wet upper body for me to admire. His dark hair fell back with water droplets dripping to his burly wet shoulders. He oozed out sexiness that made me smile and brought in a familiar feeling before I sat up in bed. He looked up to meet my eyes. I saw the smile that appeared on his face revealing the indents in his cheeks.

“Hey, how was your night?” he greeted pressing his wet lips to my forehead. He left tingles on the spot he caressed with soft fleshes I found sensual. I placed my hand faintly on his wet arm. Water marred my palm.

“Alhamdulillah, it was fine” I replied raising my eyelids to look at him.

“How are you feeling now?” he asked rubbing my arm faintly while he maintained an eye contact with me.

“Better” I replied my voice hoarse from sleep.

“I want to speak with you” he sat next to me grasping my hand in most gentle way ever. My eyes followed his movement. He sighed before he spoke. “This morning after you slept off, I spoke with a friend of mine. His name is Agent Luan Santos”

“Where is he from?” I frowned at the unfamiliar name.

“Brazil. He works for Interpol and is in charge of Santino’s case. Santino is nowhere to be found after they invaded his base in the outskirt of London. He had been on Santino’s case for almost six years”

“Santino is a hardened criminal” I mused. Amir nodded his head in agreement.

“We spoke about the explosion and all. We came to a conclusion” he paused and held my hand firmer. “We are hiring an extra bodyguard for you” My face twisted into a displeased frown. “You need it. This time both Ines and this bodyguard will go everywhere with you”

“I don’t want that” I snatched my hand from his.

“I know hayati but we have no choice”

“I have a choice” I rose to my feet. “I don’t want that. I can’t take another bodyguard. I had not taken care of one. How will I take care of two” I hissed, anger beginning to build up in me.

“Noor please” he begged as he stood up. “We don’t know what Santino is planning next. We don’t know what he might do”

“I still do not want one”

“Please” he took my hand, his eyes held my flaming eyes. “We need this. You need this. I can’t take the risk of what had happened to occur again. I can’t be with you all the time. We know this can’t stop Santino from coming closer to us but prevention is better than cure” His words got into me. I tried to understand but the images of having two bodyguards behind me all the time made me cringe. It was bad, so bad.

“I don’t want this” I squeaked.

“I know Noor” he brought me into his chest.

“I hate this” I complained holding unto him.

“I know. I hate everything too but what can we do?”

Amir left for work without eating. Why? Because we were fasting. It was something we do together not often but he fasts more than I do. Astaghfrihullah, I would say laziness do not make me fast most of the time. I invited Feyi over who came thirty minutes after I called her.

“That’s early” I said welcoming her into my beautiful abode.

“Wow” she looked around as if she had not been in my house before. “Your home smells nice”

“Thanks” I led her into the living room. In the living room, Sandra stood with her welcoming smile. “Oh Feyi” I gripped Feyi’s arm. “You did not meet Sandra last time. This is Sandra my housekeeper and a friend of mine” I introduced.

“Welcome ma’am” Sandra let out a hand.

“Hi” Feyi replied with her smile getting hold of her hand. “How are you doing?”

“Fine ma’am”

“Sandra, please help me with the snacks and drink I kept on the kitchen island. We shall be in the living room upstairs”

“Alright ma’am”

“I got so much gist for you Noor” Feyi babbled as we walked upstairs. “London has been amazing and I am so sorry for Mi Jin’s death. She was an amazing lady to be with”

“Thanks” I led her to a seat.

“I love this place” she said with happiness radiating from her face. “The décor is deluxe. Who designed the interior of your home?”

“Mahira” I sat next to her.

“Your husband’s cousin?” I nodded my head. Sandra walked in with a tray of snacks and drinks. I got to my feet to get them from her.

“Thanks” I said.

“My pleasure ma’am”

“If you know how amazing London has been for me, you will be awed. From the fashion weeks and other events, to the clubs and parties. I am having a blast” she jumped in her seat.

“Did you meet a guy lately?”

“A lot but I turned them off except one. He is British and we had a night stand” she cringed at her words. “I swear I did not know how that happened. I just woke up and knew something had happened the night before”

“It happens a lot. You are not the first”

“Wow, you won’t scold me for that”

“No” I nodded my head. As I poured out drink from the jug into a tumbler, I remembered my own one night stand. At least she remembered the guy. I can’t remember mine! I don’t know him and I can never remember him. The fact I got pregnant and aborted it was worse. Why will I judge her when I knew I did worse?

“Temi called me and we spoke a lot”

“She called me yesterday morning and it was a nice conversation” I smiled even though the memory of my past got into my heart.

“She misses us” Feyi placed her hands over her heart. “Don’t you have class?”

“I got class by noon”

We spoke for a long time until I wanted to leave for school. She kept me company and made me laugh with her jokes and unending gist. I dropped her off at her home before leaving for school in a Porsche Amir just got for me. School was boring. Every time I glanced at the space beside me, it reminded me of Mi Jin. The bubbly girl who made the class lively. Everyone loved her. Now all I had was Liza and other friends like the Indian girl Simran but I was closest to Mi Jin.

After my last class, I headed out of class with the aim to get home early and cook dinner before iftar.

“Good evening ma’am” I heard a familiar voice behind me.

“Nikolas” I called standing next to my car. He stood few feet away from me hands in his pockets.

“Well…..how may I help you?” I asked confused he used ma’am for me and we have never spoken before. “I am Noorie. Call me Noorie or Noor”

“Well, I will drive you home”

“Oh” I gasped. “Sorry, I have my car”

“The thing is” he moved closer, the corners of his lips twitching. I held my bag to my body and moved back to the car. “I am your new bodyguard”

“Excuse me?”

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