Waking up to the warmth of a new day with the feeling of happiness and no fear of some man out there to get us anymore was terrific. I sat on the built in bench of the window, legs crossed at my ankles with my back against the wall. The sky was tainted, no longer the depth of dark. Nightfall was yet to give in to light but I could see the sea of discolouring grass that spread out and the vibrant autumn flowers. The hammock in between the trees swung gently to the morning breeze that propelled. It was a new day, new feeling, new life and a new overwhelming glee. I felt the delight simmering in me that I could not contain it and had to show it on my vibrant face. I had spoken to my family who were so happy I was back to my normal self. Raihana had asked if Amir and I were good again. Were we? I was still angry at him but I gave her a positive reply.

Amir had woken me up for Fajr. We prayed but that does not mean I had forgiven him. I had made him know before he showed me his smile and acted like nothing was wrong between us. After I had shut him up with an attitude, he had walked out of the room and I had not seen him since then. The delight I had had not made me fall back to sleep so I had decided to watch the sun rise over the horizon and witness the beginning of a new day.

The rusty leaves of the trees shone like they were smeared with gold. Inflamed rays of the rising sun kissed the sky, its tinges shed light on every cleft of the spread. It splattered the bank of cloud beams of cerise which was enthralling, inciting me to look intently into the soaring sun. I called Zoya bhabi using the house's telephone, the new mother who was glad to hear from me said something about my number not reachable and I lied about misplacing my phone after I switched it off. That reminds me. I lost my phone and my entire bag the day before when I was kidnapped. Now, I had to get another one.

"Good morning habibti" I heard his voice which I turned my head to. He had a tray in hand. His face painted with a very vibrant smile. His smile had always been beautiful, something I could not resist. Now that I felt nothing but anger at him, it had not gotten into me.

"What is so good about the morning?" I ridiculed whipping my head back at what stole my breath away. I had not seen his face but I was sure my reply must have stung him because he had not said a word.

"Well, everything" he replied stopping next to me. "You are here, hale and hearty. We are privileged to witness another day and a beautiful morning. So what's not good about the morning?"

"I said it last night Amir" I still had my eyes on the sky. "I am in no mood for your cheesy words. You have done so much for them to get into me" I shot him a quick glare then looked away. He was silent again.

"I made breakfast" he broke his silence. I scorned at his words.

"You can't cook Amir. You know nothing about the kitchen and household chores" I turned to look at him.

"Well, I can always try right?" he tried to force a smile on his face that had turned gloomy. Gone was the vibrant smile.

"You won't get it" I held his eyes.

"You can always check what I tried to make" he tried to convince.

"It will be of no use. It won't be good anyways"

"How about you check it out before you judge?"

"Then let's see what you have"

He laid the breakfast out on the table in the reading crook. I observed from where I sat, ready to see what he had tried to make. When he opened the first dish, my eyes went wide. What? A laughter left my lips so hard that it kept rolling none stop until I felt the tears in my eyes.

"Wh...wha...." I tried to talk but laughed harder. He pursed his lips then slumped into the armchair of the reading crook. "What is this Amir?" I pointed at the half done egg in the plate.

"Omelette" he said opening the next dish. Nearly burnt bread gawked at me. Laughter rolled out again. My legs fell from the bench as I laughed harder. He sat, gazed at me laugh until I stopped. "Are you done?" He asked clearly displeases.

"If this" I looked at the half done egg that was flat but torn and nearly burnt. "Was omelette dear husband then no one, not even you would eat it. And if this was called a toast, then I will never eat bread"

"I tried though"

"I had said it before. You won't get it so why waste your effort in the kitchen?" I shrugged.

Perky sunrays splashed into the room through the windows. The sky had turned bright. A new day had finally arrived. I saw a bird fly out of a tree into the brilliant firmament. His shoulders slumped before he sat well, dropped his hand in between his separated thighs then exhaled heavily. I looked away back to what hypnotized me.

"I know I had done wrong Noor" he said. Something had made me look at him, maybe the sadness that coated his voice. "I could have done better than that" he raised his head. His eyes met mine. It would be a lie if I had said those gorgeous pair had not made my heart flip but I had not let them soften my resolve to make him regret. "I had thought it was the best I could do to protect you. He was going to have you. I said it before he sent pictures of you. I had panicked wondering what I could do to prevent him from succeeding"

"And you thought sending away and trying to break me was the best thing you could do" I snarled at him.

"Noor, I am sorry" His eyes held sincerity. "I regret everything. Your absence from here made things hard. When I came back home, I came back to cheerfulness with memories in every corner but when you left, I came back to despair with sadness every corner. Everything reminded me of you. At one point, I could not take in the separation. I wanted you back but Santino was still there"

"You are a crazy man Amir" Tears gushed into my eyes as I rose to my feet. "Of all things and ideas, you thought the best was to break me and make my heart ache. Your words and attitude seemed so deliberate but whatever the reason was does not justify your actions"

"I am sorry" he stood up then walked over to meet me. "I am sorry"

"Oh, sorry can't make me any better. Do you know how it felt to be away from you?"

"Yes"

"Really?" I snorted. "You know the pain? The ache that got worse? If you had known what I went through Mr Hussein, then you would be running back to meet me"

"I did"

"A lie will make it worse Amir"

"I did Noor. I really did. I came to Nigeria to take you back" he stepped closer. "But I could not. I just can't because I felt they were watching me. I would lead them to you" he reached out to hold my hands

"Don't lay a hand on me!" I warned flinching back. He exhaled once again.

"Noorie please" He dropped to his knees making my eyes go wide. "Please don't do this. Don't push me away" a tear broke free from his gland. "I know I have done wrong. The feeling, I understand everything. Please Noor, I am sorry" he raised his head to look at me. Two lone tears fell. Stupid man! He knows I can't stand that and he was doing it. He made his eyes gaze into mine so that I could see what was in his heart and mind. "I was lonely without you. I felt the ache, the distance between us made things worse. I was scared for your safety. Your messages made it worse. I knew I was doing wrong but what choice did I have? When you came back, standing there by the door" he exhaled more tear streaming down his face. "It had skipped, hard and stumped. It had been long since I saw you. Should I say you were prettier? I had the urge to rush to you, hug you and hold you tight but I knew what was at risk. Please, punish me the way you want but don't push me away. It breaks me" A tear rolled down my face.

"Ya Allah!" I muttered looking at him. My eyes unblinking glared harder. This was what he wanted me to feel right. I moved to him, my gaze stony. He held my eyes, weak and maybe tired. I can't tell.

"You idiot" I sent my palm to his shoulder. "Do you know the impact of what you did? You broke me. You made me cry. You gave me sleepless nights. I wanted to come back. I wanted to be with you but you kept pushing me away. Do you know how heart breaking your attitude was? And you expect me to jump into your arms when you say sorry?"

"I am sorry Noor. Really sorry" He caught my wrists.

I was already a water work mess. His eyes held mine as though he wanted me to see the window to his heart and mind. I seized my wrist from his hold, slumped to the floor and broke into tears. My wails filled the room. I felt the comforting warmth around my juddering body. He held me close, repeated his apologises as I wept harder. Amir Hussein Mashood succeeded in breaking my walls.

"Here" his voice was very hoarse when he handed me a box of tissue. I glared at him, removed a tissue from the box and blew my running nose. I repeated the process but this time, the tissue was meant to wipe my tears. He got hold of my wrist before I could. "May I?"

"I don't need your help" I turned away. I heard him release a heavy breath.

"Are you still annoyed at me?" His voice was low. I looked at him, got to my feet and padded to the bathroom.

How would I be angry after breaking the walls around me? I was vexed at myself for giving in so quickly. I thought I would be able to keep on with the act but he broke my walls. Crazy man! When I walked into the bathroom, I turned around to look at him. His eyes were on me.

"I hate you Amir Hussein Mashood!" I screamed at him then shut the door hard.

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