When it was lunchtime time Mirio, Nejire, and Tamaki tried to sit by you, but you kept moving away or trying to make a barrier so no one would go near you. But since your powers were so weak now, they easily broke it and sat with you over and over again.  You finally gave up and let them sit next to you, and Mirio started talking to you, and you never answered a question or asked them anything. You were quiet and stared at your food and refused to eat it. You weren't picky, just too depressed to eat. You would go through four-day stretches without eating sometimes and wish that it would kill you.

You couldn't take the joy that was around you, and the heaviness of your heart made it feel like it was going to fall out of your chest. Tamaki noticed you weren't eating and wondered if it was stress-related. He was going to ask, but you would never answer him.

"She hasn't talked in years, I don't think she will start now," Tamaki said, making them look at her shocked.

"Two years? Why?" Nejire asked.

"Right, Valkery sounds fimlar. Oh, I know where that name is from. That monster two years ago. No help, and you and your friend crushed it! It was great work," Mirio said with a bright smile.

"One thousand lives lost... not good work. It was never good enough; it cost the life of another hero. He stopped it, not me. I froze to put all my power in my sword, and yet he pushed me out of the way to save me," you wrote on a notepad and threw it at him.

You got up and left your food behind. You sat by yourself as far away from them as possible under a tree. You could feel yourself weakening more, which you gladly accepted. You had a plan now because you couldn't live like this any longer. All you wanted was your best friend, but that was never going to happen, so you were going to make it happen the easy way.

Tamaki came by you as you were sitting under a tree. He sat your food next to you and then sat on the other side of the tree.

"Life is hard. It's never fair, and if I lost Mirio, I would never be the same. He made me want to be better. He was like a warm ray of sunshine to me when I first moved here. Ever since he talked to me, I looked up to him. I can't imagine how you feel, but I don't think it's your fault. You didn't push your friend in the way to say yourself. You didn't kill all those people. You tried to save them when no one else could be there. You will never get over it as long as you carry the blame for it. Forgive yourself first if you can, it will be the hardest thing you can ever do but you will be able to once when the time is right. You need something to fight for. Everyone does. Your friend died for you, so fight for you. It will be hard, and loss changes people and everything about them, but you made me want to be a hero too.

It took me a while to realize who you were. You used to be in magazines a lot, but always with a smile and wing so beautiful and bright. You may think you lost everything, but you will have people now who will always have your back. No matter what you will. You just have to learn to trust us; it will be hard, but you will be able to hopefully. Take all the time you need, we will be here," he said as you sighed weakly.

How could you forgive yourself? It was like forgiving the villains for what they did. The bell rang, and he came from behind the tree to help you up. You didn't know if you should take his hand or not, then Mirio and his other friend came over to you.

They had weak smiles, and you looked into the clear plastic cup with water in it and saw your friend's face. You thought about it and took his hand even though you were still unsure. Your mind was in a fog most of the time until you ended up in class 1a with the three most powerful students in school.

Everyone seemed shocked and excited, but you were dull because you were like them once. But then things changed. Your heart was breaking seeing all the happy faces and them wanting to ask questions. Tamaki ended up facing the wall while you were being asked questions but ignoring them since you haven't talked in front of people in so long.

"What does your quirk do? Are you as strong as people say you are? What was it like fighting that monster two years ago? Is your armor permanently damaged because of the monster?"

You didn't know if they were asking you those questions or if it was all in your head, but you turned your back to them and saw Tamaki shaking in fear. He was trying to be your friend, so you needed to try to be his. You never had friends after you lost your best friend, so you were a bit rusty. But you know everyone was staring at him now because he was so shy.

You put a hand on him, then slowly got out of your right angel wing to cover him. Everyone was shocked but not for the right reason. Your wing wasn't as beautiful as it was this morning. It was brittle and cracked due to the pain you were feeling. A massive chunk of your wing broke off and penetrated the tile floor, making it stand up. Everyone looked at you shocked, and when Tamaki heard a thud, he looked at you and saw you in what was left of your armor.

You turned around and made your other wing appear. You made your broken sword appear as well as your shield that wasn't a shield anymore. Everyone was silent when they saw all the damage to your armor and your wings, then the burned handprint that was on your chest piece from your best friend. It had a perfect handprint from his blue glove that melted to your chest piece when he touched you to save you. Pieces of your armor crumbled and turned to smoke as you stood there covering Tamaki with your wing.

"Y/n, you don't have to do this," Tamaki said as you didn't say anything.

You looked at the ground in shame, almost as if your armor was cracking and falling away.

"Hey.....," Fat Gum said as he looked at you.

"Y/n hasn't spoken in years, Sorry, I should have warned you," he said as you made your wings go back and your armor disappeared.

Your wings went back, but it was sickening due to the sound of them cracking and your feathers snapping due to being so brittle. If only you had the will to fight, then you would be so beautiful again, but you lost that, and it was eating you alive.

Pieces of your wings fell to the ground and started to disappear like your armor did, making them confused and horrified.

"Will that grow back?!" Mirio asked.

You shook your head no because you didn't have the most basic need for it to return. All you felt was pain now, and all you needed to feel was love, maybe the will to make it come back, but you wanted it to hurt. You wanted to not be able to your powers again because you didn't feel like you deserved them.

You went on patrol with your superhero suit on because it was required. It was part of a test which you didn't participate in for two years. Lots of people hated you for what happened that day. If you died, maybe things would have been different, but everyone just wanted someone to blame.

"Thanks for letting me join! Normally, first years don't get to go on patrol!" Kirishima said as you looked around a bit shocked no one recognized you.

"Not a problem, you seemed eager to start, and this should be easy, but things can go bad very fast, so be on your toes," he said as you stood near Tamaki.

"I'm sorry for your loss, by the way, and also, sorry your quirk is broken. Do you know why you two were the only ones there?" Kirishima asked as you said nothing but looked at the lights trying to think of something to fix your wing, but nothing made you happy.

"She hasn't spoken since then, not to anyone. If she did know, I don't think she would be with us," Tamaki said as Mirio smiled.

"She will have to say something one day! I want to be there when you say your first word. I'm so excited!" He said as he went off to his sector to patrol.

"I am too. Don't worry. Y/n everything will be fine," Nejire smiled as she went off to explore her sector.

Kirishima and Tamaki were talking while you walked quietly beside them and Fat Gum. You were starting to feel people staring at you, but you ignored it the best you could.

"Murder! Someone screamed at you, and a hotdog was thrown at you.

You didn't bother to stop it from hitting you, and when it hit you, Kirishima looked at you shocked.

"Hey everyone! It's that lovely girl who calls herself a hero! She's back after hiding herself! Go fucking die you bitch! You killed a thousand people with no remorse!" A man screamed, making everyone look at you and get away from you as far as possible.

"Hey! She didn't kill anyone to leave her alone!" Kirishima yelled as mustard got all over your hair.

"Red Riot, it's hard for people to get over things. Sometimes, people will hate you even if you try to do the right thing. People like that can't let things go," Fat Gum said as a car came speeding towards your group, so you pushed them all out of the way, and you got hit hard.

You were sent flying into another car and tipped it over on its side, breaking one of your wings off completely and then shattering the rest of your armor.

"Y/n!" Tamaki panicked as guys with guns came into view.

You lay there as it started raining and looked up at the sky sadly. You tried to get up, but a mob was forming around you that wanted your blood.

"Murder!" A woman yelled as food was being thrown at you.

"My son died because of you!" A man yelled as you were hit with a bat, breaking your second wing completely off.

"You should go kill yourself for what you did!"

"You are no better than the villains!"

"Go to hell you demon bitch!"

"We will make sure justice is done from you killing all those people and Blue Speed!"

"Do you even care he died because of you?!"

"You sacrificed another hero to live!"

Water, paint, fish blood, and guts were dumped on you things from food to rocks were Bing thrown at you and people were hitting you with baseball bats.

"Glad we got that settled! We need to get Y/n!" Kirishima said as they tied up the last of the bad guys.

Police officers quickly were being called to the area and were rushing past them.

"Oh my god, y/n," Tamaki said as Fat Gum saw the massive hard surrounding you.

It was like you were a villain. The crowd was so thick that no cars could pass by, and everyone was screaming slurs at you and hitting you while you were being beaten up with bats. It was pure chaos as police cars were trying to control the crowd, but no one was listening. They were angry about something that happened two years ago.
It wasn't even your fault, but you were being blamed for it, and that was one of the reasons you couldn't let go. People started fighting the police as more and more came out to try to help control the crown.

Tamaki quickly used his powers to clear a path to get to you, and Fat Gum and Kirishima quickly went to your side.

"Y/n..." Kirishima said as he saw your wings were gone.

Your suit wasn't even a suit anymore because it was damaged by people ripping it apart and beating the hell out of you.

"Leave her alone right now! What the hell did she ever do to you?!" Kirishima yelled.

"She's a monster and deserves to die after letting over a thousand people die! Where was she when they needed saving? Off doing her nails or some bull shit!" A man growled.

"She didn't kill those people, and there was a shield she couldn't break through! She tried, but no one else could be there! She tried. Why can't you get over it? She tried! There wasn't anything else she could do, and Blue Speed was her best friend! He died saving her!" Kirishima said angrily.

"Some friend she is for letting him die. One thousand thirty-five people died, and it's your fault," a man said as if you were going to get hit again, but Kirishima stopped him from hitting you making people start hating on him as well.

"Stop it now!" Tamaki yelled in a microphone he took from an officer.

"Y/n, are  you alright?" Fat Gum asked as you refused to leave the ground.

You pushed him away even though he tried to help you, and when Kirishima tried, you pushed him away to make sure they wouldn't get hated on as much as you did.

Tamaki came to you after the crowd cleared, and he saw your broken wings on the ground. You just wanted to stay there because you weren't worth the trouble. Tamaki took off his cloak and put it on you, then sat next to you without saying a word. You tried to take it off, but then he made a tentacle wrap around you, so you couldn't take it off unless you were strong. But you couldn't. Stains started to appear on it as it started sticking to the paint, making you feel horrible about yourself. You saw he was getting soaked in the pouring rain, and you looked down at the road.

"Why?" Kirishima asked.

"No heroes that day could get past that shield. Monsters were everywhere, but Y/n, Blue Speed, and all might have passed that shield. But the thing was it cost all might most of his power. They got there first, so they were going to handle it the best they could, knowing fully well they weren't going to make it. That shield leveled so many buildings and killed all those people. She was the only survivor after the fight. Somehow, that bad guy and blue speed disappeared or turned to ash. I thought, maybe... but I was wrong. They never did this to her ever," Fat Gum said as Tamaki got up and held out a hand to try to help you up, but you refused.

So, instead of waiting, he picked you up in his arms even though you tried to push him away. He wrapped tentacles around you so you wouldn't fight him. Tamaki was heartbroken and realized why you moved, but it wasn't good enough. No matter if your suit changed, people got wind and made sure you were hated. You haven't been in a hero costume in ages, but they still remember your wings. Now you were more broken them before which you didn't know was possible. Tamaki was on the verge of crying because he knew your wings wouldn't grow back and you were struggling and fighting yourself over and over again, trying to find answers. You never even tried to fight them because you felt like you deserved it. Plus, if you did fight them, all anyone would do was make it look like you were a bad guy. You needed someone, and even if he couldn't be a hero anymore, he was going to help you. He didn't want you to die. All you needed was a little bit of help. Maybe he could give it to you.